Grasping my 30's
L's doctor recommended that she go to bed a little earlier so that she can transition into one, long nap. Well- this fucking sucks. She wakes up at 6 and I'm supposed to keep her up until 12. Oye.
My brother started dating again. I told him it is too soon. I get that he's still young-ish and he feels as though he wasted his 20's & 30's in a loveless marriage, but his impulsiveness worries me. I don't think he's actually sad about the divorce. I'm guessing he feels inadequate and now he's got to make up for lost time or something. His broken relationship is the reason i would NEVER encourage people to marry a hs sweetheart.
I don't know. On one hand, I'm so happy his ex is going to fade into the background. She was one of the shittiest people I've ever known. Their daughter is starting to kind of emulate her mother- so that's a bummer. At least there is hope for their son. He's a pretty good kid.
And now for something completely different!
I know we're all figuring out this 'mom' thing as we go along. No one is perfect. It really is everything people tell you it is. It's the hardest and most rewarding thing. I told myself (my plan-ney, controlling self) following a very good conversation with my father, that she will be who she is. I know that sounds stupid, but part (if not all) of her personality is a done deal. If she likes dolls and playing with clothes- who cares? People act as if a little girl adapting to some sort of gender role is some sort of shameful thing.
The truth is that you have no idea who your child will grow up to be. You hope that they'll be smart, kind and happy. Telling people that they are not nurturing, or feminine is implying that it's not OK to be either. I was insanely tom boyish. I grew up in a house full of boys. However, once i felt comfortable in my femininity (19+) i could let go a little bit and enjoy the fun parts of being a girl. These people that i speak of are loving and caring mothers. They just annoyed me with their comments. Obviously we know OUR kids better than anyone- but who they are has yet to be determined. I'm just not going to downplay or not embrace parts of my child's constantly changing likes and dislikes because i would prefer that they only do gender neutral or non-gender specific things. That's dumb. It's powerful to be a woman. I don't want her to not know that.
OK. I'm going to go run on the treadmill. I'm grateful for that thing and I'm honestly feeling better now that I'm back to working out 6 days a week- but running outside is sooooo much better. Too-da-loo!