Love?
Well.
Yesterday I went on my second date with Bekah. We went to Nan. It was much classier than I thought it would be, and much more expensive, and we were the only ones there. It was a little awkward, but not for too long: we started talking and everything was fine. We went to see Super 8. We held hands, got gelato, sat in the secret garden, sang "Suddenly Seymour", came back to my place, drank some wine, made out.
But it just wasn't very...it just didn't...she's just so passive, quiet. She doesn't seem to have a whole lot of passion about anything. Hm.
And she's just crazy about me. I fulfilled one of her dreams. She wanted to stay the night really bad, but she had to get home so her mom wouldn't worry.
Tomorrow I'm going to meet Callie again, with her sister and friends. I have this awful feeling she's going to be the same way. I'm actually more afraid I'll fall for her sister, haha.
How many hearts am I going to break before I find someone I can be happy with, even for a little while?
I think I realized what I did wrong, what I never said. Maybe I just can't move on because you cloud my head: every part of it. Did you know that? Well, I'm going to tell you. Soon. This was just some notion I created that would help me cope with it. But as I lie in bed and think about it, it grows on me. Like inception. I start rethinking the past. Every insult, every word, every glance. It just makes sense. Everything about it seems to make sense. I just want to be right about it, because I'm so sure--not just that I'm right: I'm sure that we just work really well together.
Sometimes I wonder if you are waiting, hoping for me to come back to you. Not just ask you to spend the night, to tell you how I really feel, how I've always felt, how no one else really meant anything to me: just you. I imagine that with every conversation we have, you try so, so very hard to conceal your feelings, but every now and then you slip: a smile, you lean in close, you stare a little too long.
How will you react when I finally tell you how I feel? We'll find out soon, I guess.
(Wow, this post is SOOO freaking emo. Just look at the title! Jeez.)
Yesterday I went on my second date with Bekah. We went to Nan. It was much classier than I thought it would be, and much more expensive, and we were the only ones there. It was a little awkward, but not for too long: we started talking and everything was fine. We went to see Super 8. We held hands, got gelato, sat in the secret garden, sang "Suddenly Seymour", came back to my place, drank some wine, made out.
But it just wasn't very...it just didn't...she's just so passive, quiet. She doesn't seem to have a whole lot of passion about anything. Hm.
And she's just crazy about me. I fulfilled one of her dreams. She wanted to stay the night really bad, but she had to get home so her mom wouldn't worry.
Tomorrow I'm going to meet Callie again, with her sister and friends. I have this awful feeling she's going to be the same way. I'm actually more afraid I'll fall for her sister, haha.
How many hearts am I going to break before I find someone I can be happy with, even for a little while?
I think I realized what I did wrong, what I never said. Maybe I just can't move on because you cloud my head: every part of it. Did you know that? Well, I'm going to tell you. Soon. This was just some notion I created that would help me cope with it. But as I lie in bed and think about it, it grows on me. Like inception. I start rethinking the past. Every insult, every word, every glance. It just makes sense. Everything about it seems to make sense. I just want to be right about it, because I'm so sure--not just that I'm right: I'm sure that we just work really well together.
Sometimes I wonder if you are waiting, hoping for me to come back to you. Not just ask you to spend the night, to tell you how I really feel, how I've always felt, how no one else really meant anything to me: just you. I imagine that with every conversation we have, you try so, so very hard to conceal your feelings, but every now and then you slip: a smile, you lean in close, you stare a little too long.
How will you react when I finally tell you how I feel? We'll find out soon, I guess.
(Wow, this post is SOOO freaking emo. Just look at the title! Jeez.)