Parents' Weekend Talent Show, Saturday evening
The place was set up and appropriately glittered, Cecil was in his very best tie and well-trimmed furry pants, there was plenty of food for before, after, and between, Foucault was guarding the punch bowl against spiking, and all the equipment was ready - now they just needed the people
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"Oh, and just in case anything deadly materializes, please don't forget to note where the nearest exit is," he added cheerfully. "Thanks!"
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There was a reason for that, Cecil. Dark Owl Records notwithstanding.
"So everybody please welcome Barry and Jeremy!"
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A gremlin bitten Barry and Jeremy.
Or at least in Jeremy's mind... George Fucking Michael and his glorious hair and tight jeans.
"Iiiiii don't want your freeeeeeedom!" George crooned as he stepped onto the stage. "I don't want to play around! I don't want nobody's baby! Part-time love just brings me down! I don't want your FREEEEEEEEEEEDOM!"
George spun around so his tight jeans and luscious bum were facing the audience. "You know why I don't want your freedom?" he asked the audience as his perfect wig-hair flipped this way and that.
I WANT YOUR SEX!
The music changed as George Fucking Michael began to gyrate and shimmy his glorious bum at the audience.
There's things that you guess
And things that you know
There's boys you can trust
And girls that you don't
There's little things you hide
And little things that you show
Sometimes you think you're gonna get it
But you don't and that's just the way it goes..George wiped his brow with one finger and tossed a bead of sweat out to his screaming admirers ( ... )
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And if anyone watching "Freddie" was curious about anatomy they might wonder if Freddie was naturally endowed or had an armadillo stuffed down his pants.
GIIIIIIIIIVE MEEEEE! YOUUUUUUUUUUR BOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDYYYYY!
For a dead guy, Freddie had quite a pair of lungs.
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And his marvelous singing of course.
I WANT YOUR SEX!
Yep. It's the medley of the century people.
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Oh and don't think Freddie hasn't noticed your marvelous bum, George Michael.
He was definitely noticing that body language.
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Oh yeah, Freddy! Let's boogie our bums over together and bump and grind them for the audience! They should love that!
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Aw, yeah! Bum bumping and grinding time! Two of the most famous bums in history right here people!
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Isn't wonderful how the lighting went with George Michael's perfect hair?
And now George Michael was strutting the stage with Freddie, occasionally grabbing Freddie's tank top and then pushing him dramatically away.
Well, I guess it would be nice if I could touch your body
I know not everybody has got a body like you
But I've got to think twice before I give my heart away
And I know all the games you play because I played them too
Oh, But I need some time off from that emotion
Time to pick my heart up off the floor
Oh, When that love comes down without devotion
Well, It takes a strong man baby
But I'm showing you the door
Because I've got to have faith
I've got to have faith
Because I've got to have faith
Faith
Faith
I've got to have-
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Yep. With Freddie's singing interruption the song had once again changed. Freddie was now strutting around with George Michael occasionally providing backup vocals.
I work hard every day of my life
I work till I ache my bones
At the end I take home my hard earned pay all on my own
I get down on my knees
And I start to pray
Till the tears run down from my eyes
Lord, somebody, ooh, somebody
Can anybody find me, somebody to love?
(He works hard)
Everyday, I try and I try and I try
But everybody wants to put me down
They say I'm goin' crazy
They say I got a lot of water in my brain
Got no common sense
I got nobody left to believe
Yeah, yeah yeah yeah
Oh Lord
Somebody, somebody
Can anybody find me, somebody toooooooooooooooo
Hmm. Freddie was having trouble hitting that higher register. Oh Dear.
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By grabbing Freddie's package and giving it a good squeeze.
That poor armadillo.
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LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!
Aw, yeah. Thank you for that lift George Michael!
The pair then went back to back as the finished the song....
Find me somebody to love
Find me somebody to love
Find me somebody to love
Can anybody find me somebody to love?
Find me somebody to love
Find me somebody to love
Find me somebody to love
"THANK YOU! THANK YOU! GOOD NIGHT FANDOM WE LOVE YOU!" Freddie shouted!
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Well. There was no way she could tear into Barry over signing her up for this thing right now. Or, well, she could, but it was totally possible that he'd do something like dance at her, and when Barry danced at her, it usually turned out poorly.
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