After meeting Tara and Dolf earlier at the Perk, Raven made her way to Groovy Tunes to see Jono. To talk. But the revelation of what Azar had done was crashing down on her, leaving her more of a wreck than she already had been. Was it even possible for her guilt to become stronger? Her goddess had used her friends.
She managed a nervous smile as she stepped into the store. "Hello, Jono," she called softly.
Jono glanced up from the abomination that was an entire box of Hanson CDs, trying not to look too much like he was contemplating lighting them on fire. He'd heard wonderful things about something that they did at the Pixie Dust with clothing that they didn't want, after all...
Oh. Oh, hello, there.
//G'day, luv,// he offered, only a tiny bit on the fidgety side. It was an improvement from yesterday, at least. He'd had some time to brace himself for whatever was going to come up in conversation, here.
"Is this a good time?" Raven asked. She moved into the store, but she was careful to keep her distance, even though she was aching for a hug. "I can come back later if it is not...."
//No, it's...// Jono gave the box a sour look, and then pushed it out of the way.
The bright orange CD cover was hurting his eyes. Yes. Because orange wasn't a colour that he could possibly be used to seeing on a regular basis. At all.
//It's fine.// Awkward. But fine. //Pull up a seat? Grab a... kitten.//
//Drowning in music that I swear t'God I didn't order,// Jono replied, lifting a shoulder a little bit. //But otherwise... not bad, I suppose.//
No worse than he'd ever been, anyhow. Not great, and just not terrible enough to be able to snark lightly about people who had been more successful in their musical careers than he would ever be.
"I saw Tara this morning," Raven said. She busied herself with giving Joni a kiss to hide the pain and guilt in her eyes. "I did not realize what Azar did to her." And now she was having a serious crisis of faith.
"She was my teacher for the first 13 years of my life," Raven said with the tiniest of flinches. "She is a goddess. I do not understand why she would do something like this."
To destroy Trigon, obviously. But she'd never known Azar to be so ruthless.
//Because it worked,// Jono replied, simply. And for all that he wanted to throttle Azar personally for it, at least there was that.
If it hadn't worked, then not only would that have been a horrible experience, but they'd probably all be dead. Or worse.
//She's a goddess, luv. And we're just... mortals. We don't really hold equal footing with their sort. I can't imagine she'd view ruthlessness th'same way any of us ever would. Not if the ends have any chance of justifying th'means.//
"It did work," Raven said, nodding slightly. "Trigon is destroyed. I am all that remains of him now."
Until she found out about her retconned brothers, at least.
"I just do not know how I can pray to Azar now, knowing how she hurt my friends," she went on. "But that is something I must discover for myself, I suppose. But...I am angry, too." Angry that her friends had been used, angry that she had been used by the goddess. If Azar had had this master plan, she'd never shared it with Raven and had used her like a pawn almost as much as Trigon or Sebastian had.
Jonothon nodded, looking down at the counter, wrinkling his nose at the box of 98 Degrees that he had been avoiding the hell out of, and then looking up again.
//I'd be worried, if you weren't at least a little,// he admitted.
If Raven wasn't angry at Azar over this, odds were high that he'd be more angry, probably irrationally at everything, to make up for that.
"She did not ask Tara, nor allow her to explain to you and the others," Raven said miserably. Joni had settled in her lap, kneading her leg as Raven pet her. "Nor did she ever explain to me what her intentions were. I feel used, and I never expected Azar to make me feel that way."
//Good and evil never were so black and white,// Jono noted, softly. //It wasn't just you, and us. It was all of Azarath.//
Like the entire existence of the place was simply to prime enough souls to prepare for the destruction of Trigon. Jono didn't know for certain if that was the case, but just thinking about it made him feel ill.
"And now Azarath is gone," Raven murmured. It still hadn't really hit her yet. She'd been exiled from her home since she'd come to Fandom, but it was still there. Now it wasn't.
"And I no longer feel Azar with me. Perhaps she is gone as well. Though I could not feel her before...before all this began." She wasn't sure if it was her father's power that blocked her connection to her goddess or if it had been something else entirely.
She managed a nervous smile as she stepped into the store. "Hello, Jono," she called softly.
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Oh. Oh, hello, there.
//G'day, luv,// he offered, only a tiny bit on the fidgety side. It was an improvement from yesterday, at least. He'd had some time to brace himself for whatever was going to come up in conversation, here.
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The bright orange CD cover was hurting his eyes. Yes. Because orange wasn't a colour that he could possibly be used to seeing on a regular basis. At all.
//It's fine.// Awkward. But fine. //Pull up a seat? Grab a... kitten.//
Joni had found Raven's ankles already.
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She shifted Joni to one arm so she could sit down and adjust her skirt. Awkward? She'd have some of that, too. "How are you today?" she asked.
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No worse than he'd ever been, anyhow. Not great, and just not terrible enough to be able to snark lightly about people who had been more successful in their musical careers than he would ever be.
Damn them.
//... You?//
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//Azar is a bit of a piece of work,// he noted, his tone far more carefully neutral than his mindset, on that topic.
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To destroy Trigon, obviously. But she'd never known Azar to be so ruthless.
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If it hadn't worked, then not only would that have been a horrible experience, but they'd probably all be dead. Or worse.
//She's a goddess, luv. And we're just... mortals. We don't really hold equal footing with their sort. I can't imagine she'd view ruthlessness th'same way any of us ever would. Not if the ends have any chance of justifying th'means.//
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Until she found out about her retconned brothers, at least.
"I just do not know how I can pray to Azar now, knowing how she hurt my friends," she went on. "But that is something I must discover for myself, I suppose. But...I am angry, too." Angry that her friends had been used, angry that she had been used by the goddess. If Azar had had this master plan, she'd never shared it with Raven and had used her like a pawn almost as much as Trigon or Sebastian had.
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//I'd be worried, if you weren't at least a little,// he admitted.
If Raven wasn't angry at Azar over this, odds were high that he'd be more angry, probably irrationally at everything, to make up for that.
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Like the entire existence of the place was simply to prime enough souls to prepare for the destruction of Trigon. Jono didn't know for certain if that was the case, but just thinking about it made him feel ill.
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"And I no longer feel Azar with me. Perhaps she is gone as well. Though I could not feel her before...before all this began." She wasn't sure if it was her father's power that blocked her connection to her goddess or if it had been something else entirely.
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Sorry, Raven. Jono thought that your goddess was a bit of a worthless bint.
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