It was just the sort of evening that usually began with a disclaimer about strong personal convictions regarding a belief in the occult before fading serenely into darkness and the sound of frogs croaking pleasantly in the background.
It was also just the sort of evening that, by some twist of fate, would see a scary man in a skirt young woman in
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With a boombox.
"...is that a poodle skirt?" And a confused expression.
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And then, 'she' dropped her tone down to a more serious note. "I'm sorry I didn't believe you," 'she' stated.
Really, the car had run out of gas and all.
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"Oh god, are we gonna do this?"
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Cue the music...
"It's close to midnight and something evil's lurking in the dark." Deadpool nodded, oh so smug. Sure, he was much gravelier than Michael Jackson, but it was excellent.
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He was now wearing blue jeans and a denim jacket... Still with shoulder-pads... And his hair was in a glorious 80's updo.
It had something to do with the entire opening sequence being a movie. Really. Roll with it.
In any case, 'she' had her nose in the air and was pushing forward, trying to ignore him. Hrmph!
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Never mind that now!
"Under the moonlight, you see a sight that almost stops your heart!"
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... Seriously?
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She was, however, transfixed by the extravagant musical number. Why was Professor Algren wearing high-heeled shoes, and cooing at Professor Deadpool? How did the dance number come to be so very synchronized? Curiouser and curiouser, indeed. She drew closer, hoping to remain unseen, unable to look away.
Curiosity hadn't killed The Cat. It would be less kind to Alice.
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That was, until she was pulled out of her reverie by the unmistakable sound of footfalls, behind her. Very close. Alice, weren't you paying attention?
So many zombies, and she'd let her guard down. Such a pity, what a pretty, girl to die so young ...
Alice whirled around, holding her blade firmly. "You'll make no meal of me," she said harshly. "Go before I cut you into pieces."
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...
This one isn't much better.
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I wanna eat your spicy yummy brains, and I am not even a zombie.
ETA: In real life. As far as you know, anyhow.
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