yeah, it's the people who think they are well-adjusted when they're not who are the ones in trouble. it looks as if the OP has acknowledged the situation, so good for him/her.
Word. A lot of people I know have actually discovered what they want to do and where they want to be, life and careerwise, through fandom, and fandom is a part of their lives even though they're constantly living it up left right and center. I myself would not be studying what I am right now, were it not for fandom widening my field of interests.
Yeah, but for some people, it's like an addiction? I know I can drink the occasional beer and it's no problem, but people with real alcohol issues don't always have that luxury: it's either abstinence or dependence. For someone who is truly over-invested in fandom, getting out completely is a very healthy thing to do.
Why let social status and "real life" limit your happiness? I mean, is some amount of escapism really that awful, if you honestly prefer it to the alternatives?
And what exactly is wrong with staying a nerd, anyway?
First of all, I'd like to wish you good luck. I do hope that you find what you're looking for.
However, fandom did not make you a loser. The problem is not that you were participating in fandom, it was that you were withdrawing from real life. And until you figure out what you were hiding from, I don't think you're going to get better.
Yep, this right here. But I think the OP is taking a good first step, to remove hirself from the thing that was distracting them from what their core issues are, and get down to the business of figuring out why it was so easy for them to withdraw so completely from real life. Anything that's fun and pleasurable can be used to distract yourself from the things that scare you, not just fandom.
I'm weirdly tempted to call troll here just because that's such a stereotype of BNFness, but the way you express it is so quirky I think it must be for real. Best of luck, OP. But...speaking personally, I can have an emotionally and mentally full life and still participate in fandom. I guess it's a matter of balance. Truth, it's not like quitting fandom can magically give someone a busy real life with lots of friends to love on. It can give you more time and mental space to meet people and whatnot, sure, but it can't magically turn you into Social Girl if that's not who you really are.
I have a pretty successful real life by most people's standards and still feel like comic book guy. :(
You just gotta do what makes you happy, OP. Of course I am a giant anonymous hypocrite, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't do whatever makes you happy. Real life, geekery, or some balance of the two. Happiness is not a waste.
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And what exactly is wrong with staying a nerd, anyway?
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However, fandom did not make you a loser. The problem is not that you were participating in fandom, it was that you were withdrawing from real life. And until you figure out what you were hiding from, I don't think you're going to get better.
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Good luck, OP.
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You just gotta do what makes you happy, OP. Of course I am a giant anonymous hypocrite, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't do whatever makes you happy. Real life, geekery, or some balance of the two. Happiness is not a waste.
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