Why, hello there,
fandomjunkies watchers. Long time, no see. Will and I have been having some pretty crazy lives the past few months (crazier than usual, yes), so that's our lame excuse for no fic for so long. During this time, we missed FJ's one year anniversary. So, happy belated brithday, little comm of ours. If there's anything anyone wants to see coming out of FJ anytime soon, let us know. I, at least, have some downtime coming up and would love to spend it working on fandomy things instead of devoting my entire life to Victorian-era literature (oh, IB English, you silly little course). Thanks for reading. :)
Title: Futile
Author:
callieachFandom: Bones
Prompt: 003. Futile
Character/Pairing: Angela/Jack
Rating: PG-13 (maybe heavier at the end)
Word Count: 975
Summary: The differences between giving up and giving in.
Authors Notes/Disclaimer: For
100_prompts. Nothing you recognize is mine. There are sort-of-spoilers in here for the current season, just so you know.
I'm still taking requests for use of words from
this prompt table. Pick a word that doesn't have a hyperlink and I'll write you some Jack/Angela fic (of your choice of genre, if you like). Simple as that.
She runs the Angelator again and again, the result is just shy of conclusive. She changes a variable or two and tries again. The results of this run can go one way or the other, just like all the rest. She rubs her forehead, wishing she could focus just a little bit better.
There’s a rapping on her doorframe; she jumps involuntarily, then sends an “Enter” over her shoulder without turning around.
She changes another variable and when she looks up again, there he is, standing on the opposite side of the image.
“Hi.” She gives him a quick half-smile. “Need something?”
Jack takes a breath. “We should talk.”
Angela slowly releases a mouthful of air. “Right now?”
For a moment, he looks as if he’s simply going to walk away, then he draws himself up a little taller and replies in the affirmative.
Sensing seriousness, she shuts down the Angelator and turns on her office lights. She thinks about moving to the couch; instead, they both stay where they are.
“Okay. Talk,” she tells him.
“I realize I’m holding a bit of a double standard, here, since we never hid our relationship when we were together, but I really think you should show some sensitivity when it comes to talking about your romantic and sexual adventures in the workplace.”
“Can I point out some flaws in that statement of yours?”
“Feel free.”
“One, you’re not my boss, remember? You could be, but you, like the rest of us, are under Cam, who can reprimand my topic choices as she sees fit. Two, you’re right, that is a double standard, especially since that was never an issue before we started seeing each other. Three, I cannot believe you just accused me of lacking sensitivity.”
He meets her eyes for the first time in a long time and she finds she has to look away. “One, I’ve already talked to Cam about it and she told me that’s the way you are and if I had a problem with it, I could talk directly to you. Two, it has always bothered me, Angela. I just knew you were as out of my league as all the scumbags you brought around, so I couldn’t say anything. Three, I’m not judging your disposition as a whole, but I would really appreciate some consideration of my feelings.”
“One, you knew that this wouldn’t work. Don’t try to tell me you didn’t,” she adds quickly, her voice getting louder. “Two, sure, a couple of them were lousy partners, but that’s why they’re in my past. So are you, so, by your own reasoning, you still shouldn’t be bringing this up. Three, I am thinking of your feelings, Hodgins. I can’t stop thinking about you.” Now she’s practically yelling at the space just to the right of his head, still unwilling to meet his eyes. “I’m trying to make this easier, to go back to the way we were. If, before, I could tell you about my dating habits and you would just roll your eyes or say inappropriate things, than I should be able to do that now.”
For a few long seconds, Jack simply stares at her. Then, quietly, he asks, “Do you hear yourself? Numbered arguments? Reversed arguments? Honestly thinking that we could just go back to the way we were when we first met?”
“No.”
“’No’, what, Angela?”
“No, I didn’t honestly believe we could just go back. I knew I couldn’t. I couldn’t ignore our first kiss, how could I ignore every other kiss? But I hoped we could go back. I hoped I was wrong and that we could just forget what it was like to be with each other.”
“I don’t think I could ever forget you.”
“I know. That’s why I’m trying so hard to pretend I’m forgetting you. Because if one of us forgets, we can pretend it didn’t matter, and it’ll be easier to move on.”
“Do you want to forget?”
“No, it was the happiest time of my life. But I need to forget, Jack. I need to move on.”
Even though she’s looking down now, she can still sense him moving toward her. “But why? Who says that we have to move on? Who says that we can’t last forever?”
“Nothing lasts forever.”
“Then let us be the first. Let us at least be not two of the millions who just give up. You’re a rebel, aren’t you? You should appreciate the challenge of outlasting everything you’ve ever known. Everything but love.”
“We’ve never had a shortage of love, Jack.”
“Then why did we give up?” he asks, tilting her chin up so their eyes meet. He gives her a grin. “Isn’t that all you need?”
“We broke up for a reason. Plenty of reasons, actually.”
“Name one.”
She’s acutely aware of the distance between them; she can feel the warmth of his breath on her cheeks and mouth; she can feel the gentle touch of his fingertips on her face; she can feel her heart racing in her own chest.
“I can’t,” she replies. This close, all she can do is remember the taste of his lips against her, the warmth of their bodies pressed together, and know how much she wants him.
It’s hard to say who kisses who.
The next moment, Angela is fumbling with the light controls, trying to darken the room, while Jack kisses his way from her mouth to her breasts, working on removing her shirt in the process.
As she leads him to the couch, she unbuttons his top and starts to tell herself that this’ll be the last time. Except now he’s kissing that spot on the top of her shoulder that he’s always used to tease her and she has to admit that trying to fight it would be futile.