Second Floor Common Room, Friday Afternoon

[arsenicmauls]

In the semester that she'd been here, Gert had learned that there were basically two reasons to be in a common room: to watch a bad movie or to try to pawn bagels off on people. Today, shockingly, was an example of neither.

No, today she had Chinese food to give away (seriously, what was it with the delivery guys in this town and bringing way more

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[batwaffles]

Honestly, bears. Just because Stephanie wasn't surprised by class involving the big Bat-boss busting out bear battles, it didn't mean she wasn't going to shake her head a little.

Seeeeeeeeeriously, masked man, lighten up a bit, will ya?

. . . ha, like that was going to happen.

Anyway. A workout of her own after class (because hanging around the ol' Bats always made her feel like she'd better make sure she wasn't slacking off on her training) and a shower later, she ventured common-room-ward in hopes of finding food.

"And here we have the standard food source of the Fandom High student," she intoned in a bad imitation of David Attenborough, very documentary narrator-like, "the excess amounts of takeout. Scientists have yet to determine the cause behind this common phenomenon, but we do know for certain that it occurs most often in dorm common rooms."

She dropped the accent and perched on the back of a couch. "Translation: that is for sharing, I hope, right?"

Stephanie was a dork.

[arsenicmauls]

"Yeah, go nuts," Gert said. "My guess is the delivery guys in this town are so used to teenagers' preferred portion sizes that they get a little overeager from time to time. In no way is this a lunch special for one person."

[batwaffles]

"See, I had a working theory that it's a preventative measure. As in, maybe they think it's a fair exchange to give us all this extra food so they don't have to deal with hordes of hungry high-schoolers actually invading their establishments," Stephanie remarked, helping herself to a plate and some chow mein, and ooo, dumplings. "I've met us. I wouldn't blame them, really."

[arsenicmauls]

"You know, that's interesting," Gert said thoughtfully. "We are kind of the worst." All teenagers were, really. "Kind of a 'no, really, order in, we'll make it worth your while' kind of thing. It's smart, 'cause everyone would rather not have to leave the dorms to get food."

[batwaffles]

Yeah, Stephanie didn't have the highest opinion of her own age group. Her old high school had been much worse, though.

"And we're more likely to keep ordering food if we keep getting extra, I think?" She chewed on the end of her fork in thought. "Besides, we share, other people like it, they order from there the next time they get hungry . . . it's like some kind of diabolically clever scheme."

[arsenicmauls]

Gert sort of hated all age groups. She was well-adjusted like that. Though if she had to choose, she guessed that in general, teenagers were better than the alternatives.

"Pretty decent marketing," Gert summed up. "Enticing without being sneaky and manipulative. I guess that's how to do it."

[batwaffles]

"Or," Stephanie added, holding up her fork, "it's so sneaky and manipulative we don't realize it is."

[arsenicmauls]

"Well, we kind of just nailed what they're doing," Gert pointed out. "So unless there's another layer, with, like, addictive stuff in the food or something, it seems like we're pretty aware of it."

She paused. "Not that our classmates are necessarily on the same page, I guess, if we're using a broader 'we.'"

[batwaffles]

"I guess the question is, if we're aware of it, do we actually care if we're playing right into their hands?"

She didn't seem like she did.

Also, it probably said something that Stephanie finally glanced over at Old Lace and, without pausing to WTF at the presence of a dinosaur, asked, "Oh, hi there. Who are you?"

Or, you know, just that she'd been in Fandom for a while.

[arsenicmauls]

Old Lace poked her head up and leaned over to sniff lazily at Stephanie's hand. "This would be the dinosaur who was forbidden from helping me beat up a bear today," Gert introduced. "Her name's Old Lace, she's a deinonychus, and she won't bite off your hand if you want to pet her."

[batwaffles]

"Ah, yeah. That one," Stephanie said, nodding sagely and reaching out to pat Old Lace on the head. "Yeah, I had a feeling that question was gonna come up a few times in class."

She paused in her deinonychus-petting to ask, "So, is there a rule about not feeding her people-food?" Seemed like a thing to check on.

[arsenicmauls]

Hi, Steph, Old Lace wanted to be your best friend now. There was happy panting and everything.

She was basically a puppy, but cold-blooded and more predatorial.

"Not really, if she'll eat it," Gert shrugged. "As long as it's meat, she'll be fine. Nothing from this Chinese place is gonna be any worse for her than squirrels and deer."

Hopefully.

"So how'd you get stuck with the TA gig, anyway?"

[batwaffles]

Oh, well, in that case. Stephanie took a dumpling off her plate and held it out for Old Lace.

Dear Cass, how are you? I made friends with a dinosaur today, but how's life back in good ol' Gotham?

"Oh, you know." She shrugged. "The Batman tells you you're going to be his TA, you do it. He's not a guy you mess with."

A pause for a mouthful of chow mein, and she continued. "He looks out for my city. Well -- not this version of him, exactly, but any baddies who want to mess with Gotham City better get through the big Bat first. He's got --" She made a showy jazz-hands gesture to illustrate fanfare, or something like it. "The reputation to end all reputations."

[arsenicmauls]

"Ugh. Sorry your city's stuck with him." That was maybe a little bit of a weird response, but Gert was a little weird. As a person. "Half of the rest of the faculty's from my world, but they don't put me on bear-finding duty or anything."

She paused. "You're not in charge of finding bears for him, are you?"

[batwaffles]

"Oh, no no no. No bear-finding duty for me." A horrible thought occurred to Stephanie. "Yet."

She was frowning a bit, though. She might butt heads with Batman sometimes, but he was still Batman.

"I'm not sorry," she said immediately. "Gotham probably wouldn't even exist any more without him."

[arsenicmauls]

"Is he that good?" Gert sounded dubious. "Or does he only think he's that good and spend tons of money on grappling hooks and cowls and stuff to make everyone else think so too?"