Third Floor Common Room: Thursday Afternoon
Done with classes for the week, Dor had slept in late and skipped breakfast entirely and missing lunch to boot.
So he found himself down at the common room with a large bowl of cereal where he sat and chatted with the furniture.
"Boy," he said with his mouth partially full of chocolate frosted sugar bombs. "People were sure cranky about the fire alarm last night."
The objects in the room all chuckled. "Well everyone's a bit more frustrated than usual these days," the chair mentioned and all the objects burst into laughter.
"Oh?" Dor asked innocently. "Why is that?"
"Because everyone is a little... frustrated. If you know what I mean," the lamp replied.
"Um. No," Dor said. "I don't. What do you mean?"
All the objects paused in the room and then died of laughter.
"What's so funny?" Dor asked.
"Nobody is getting any action," the sofa replied. "Do you know what I mean by that?"
Dor frowned. "No. What are you talking about?"
And the sofa began to tell a story. A story about a vampire and a girl in black leather pants. And the sofa's role in this particular story. And the actions that happened on said sofa.
In graphic detail
Dor should have left the room. He should have run. But the words just kept coming from the sofa and he just stared horrified as his innocence began to disappear in a few moments of Vampire/Alien raunchiness.
It didn't help that the other objects in the room started making rauchy sounds while the refrigerator hummed a porn soundtrack.
[Open! The couch is telling the NSFW story linked above from the way early days of FH. Dor's magic allows anyone to hear the story and all the sound effects the furniture are making.]
So he found himself down at the common room with a large bowl of cereal where he sat and chatted with the furniture.
"Boy," he said with his mouth partially full of chocolate frosted sugar bombs. "People were sure cranky about the fire alarm last night."
The objects in the room all chuckled. "Well everyone's a bit more frustrated than usual these days," the chair mentioned and all the objects burst into laughter.
"Oh?" Dor asked innocently. "Why is that?"
"Because everyone is a little... frustrated. If you know what I mean," the lamp replied.
"Um. No," Dor said. "I don't. What do you mean?"
All the objects paused in the room and then died of laughter.
"What's so funny?" Dor asked.
"Nobody is getting any action," the sofa replied. "Do you know what I mean by that?"
Dor frowned. "No. What are you talking about?"
And the sofa began to tell a story. A story about a vampire and a girl in black leather pants. And the sofa's role in this particular story. And the actions that happened on said sofa.
In graphic detail
Dor should have left the room. He should have run. But the words just kept coming from the sofa and he just stared horrified as his innocence began to disappear in a few moments of Vampire/Alien raunchiness.
It didn't help that the other objects in the room started making rauchy sounds while the refrigerator hummed a porn soundtrack.
[Open! The couch is telling the NSFW story linked above from the way early days of FH. Dor's magic allows anyone to hear the story and all the sound effects the furniture are making.]