"My apologies for the lack of class last week, guys. If any of you actually spent the time studying... I'd be very surprised. I wouldn't've. But then, I'm a depressed, semi-alcoholic novelist who can't publish a novel and is forced to make ends meet as a high school English teacher."
"You may be completely unsurprised to learn that I will not be renewing my contract for this summer or next fall. This will be our last class together."
"Anyway, your final projects are due. Please make your presentation based on your written final project." [
from the Syllabus]
"I will post your grades as soon as they are completed."