Advanced Survivalism, Friday, Period 1
It probably wasn't something you would expect from a workshop in 'survivalism,' but the first lesson was actually taking place inside a normal classroom. The reason would be obvious about ten seconds after the bell rang. And that reason was because the teacher liked to make an entrance.
And that's exactly what he did, swinging through the window on his grapple line, arching upwards, and falling gracefully onto his desk, all while his cape billowed dramatically.
He was going to pay for that window.
"I'm Batman," he said, his voice almost a growl. This was his normal speaking voice, kids! Get used to it!
Batman rose to his full height as he stepped off the desk. Even though his cape draped over his entire body, not showing an inch of the gray costume underneath, he was clearly built. And the pointy cowl just made him seem taller as he paced in front of the class. "You're here to learn about surviving the worst, most bizarre, and possibly most typical of Fandom situations anyone could devise. You will be pushed. You will have to think on your feet. At times, you will have to rely on each other. If you can manage all of that, you'll learn something. If not, leave now."
He didn't even wait for anyone to leave before continuing. If they were going, they were no longer any of his concern. "You'll receive notice before class each week where to meet," Batman said. Once he was sure that everyone who was going to stay would, he pulled a key out of his utility belt, locked the classroom door, and put the key back. "Sometimes it will be in the Danger Shop where the lessons can be more elaborate. Other times, we'll go with something a little more practical."
Batman started to stalk toward a closet at the back of the room. "Today will be your typical first class introductions. Name, school year you'll be entering in the fall, relative experience with bizarre survival situations outside of Fandom. And because this is my class, you have to present yourself while dealing with a problem. And one of the most frequent problems I've encountered is homicidal clowns."
Batman opened the closet door and a stream of gremlins dressed as clowns rushed out. If the students let the gremlins get close enough, they might notice that their clown gloves kept them from clawing or grabbing and the makeup around their lips were actually part of a well-disguised mouth guard system that would make their teeth look threatening while keeping them from doing any damage. Yes, Batman made all of this himself. Look, Fandom didn't have crime to fight. His free time was astonishing.
Anyway, the students were in absolutely no danger, but they had no easy way of telling that at the moment.
Above any ruckus being caused by the charging gremlin clowns, Batman called out, "Stephanie Brown has been volunteered to be my TA. If you have any issues you'd like to discuss with her or myself, see us after class. In the meantime, start introducing yourselves and try to avoid gremlin bites."
[OOC: I'll still be largely out and about today in NYC, but may have time for SP on my iPad between things. Very little time, most likely.]
And that's exactly what he did, swinging through the window on his grapple line, arching upwards, and falling gracefully onto his desk, all while his cape billowed dramatically.
He was going to pay for that window.
"I'm Batman," he said, his voice almost a growl. This was his normal speaking voice, kids! Get used to it!
Batman rose to his full height as he stepped off the desk. Even though his cape draped over his entire body, not showing an inch of the gray costume underneath, he was clearly built. And the pointy cowl just made him seem taller as he paced in front of the class. "You're here to learn about surviving the worst, most bizarre, and possibly most typical of Fandom situations anyone could devise. You will be pushed. You will have to think on your feet. At times, you will have to rely on each other. If you can manage all of that, you'll learn something. If not, leave now."
He didn't even wait for anyone to leave before continuing. If they were going, they were no longer any of his concern. "You'll receive notice before class each week where to meet," Batman said. Once he was sure that everyone who was going to stay would, he pulled a key out of his utility belt, locked the classroom door, and put the key back. "Sometimes it will be in the Danger Shop where the lessons can be more elaborate. Other times, we'll go with something a little more practical."
Batman started to stalk toward a closet at the back of the room. "Today will be your typical first class introductions. Name, school year you'll be entering in the fall, relative experience with bizarre survival situations outside of Fandom. And because this is my class, you have to present yourself while dealing with a problem. And one of the most frequent problems I've encountered is homicidal clowns."
Batman opened the closet door and a stream of gremlins dressed as clowns rushed out. If the students let the gremlins get close enough, they might notice that their clown gloves kept them from clawing or grabbing and the makeup around their lips were actually part of a well-disguised mouth guard system that would make their teeth look threatening while keeping them from doing any damage. Yes, Batman made all of this himself. Look, Fandom didn't have crime to fight. His free time was astonishing.
Anyway, the students were in absolutely no danger, but they had no easy way of telling that at the moment.
Above any ruckus being caused by the charging gremlin clowns, Batman called out, "Stephanie Brown has been volunteered to be my TA. If you have any issues you'd like to discuss with her or myself, see us after class. In the meantime, start introducing yourselves and try to avoid gremlin bites."
[OOC: I'll still be largely out and about today in NYC, but may have time for SP on my iPad between things. Very little time, most likely.]