Tuesday, May 29 - Period 3 - Advanced Beginner's Guide to just make something up, honestly
"We have done it!" cried one Jerry.
"We have found it!" shouted the other.
They were inside the Activities Area, running around in cheerful circles and flailing their arms. So, just like always, but with happy instead of panic.
"We have discovered the key to decoding the secrets of the universe!"
"It is here! It is ours! We have brought it to you, Jerry!"
"The Rosetta Stone!"
"The Extended Metaphor!"
"The Four for Old Times' Sake!"
"The Seattle Times!"
"The Times New Roman!"
"The Times Old Roman!"
"Behold!" Both Jerries swept their arms dramatically, revealing ...
... an orange-and-white kitten, lounging on a cushion, cheerfully eating a pen.
"THIS IS NO ORDINARY CAT!" cried one Jerry.
"This is ... THE ORACLE!" cried the other.
The Retarded Kitten Oracle yawned and set his chin on his paws. The wig-people were loud and it was his naptime.
"We have asked it many questions, Jerry."
"It always tells the truth!"
"It only tells the truth!"
"It cannot tell a lie!"
"It cannot lie down!"
The Retarded Kitten Oracle blinked a few times. Was it food time?
"For this month's issue of Investigative Abnormalities Weekly, you will be speaking directly with the Oracle. Ask questions about your future, the lottery, the fate of the world!"
"Ask questions about which microwaveable snack treat is transmitting pop songs into your mind."
"Ask questions about yourself, and be amazed at the results!"
The Retarded Kitten Oracle stuck his tongue out a little bit. He was having a good day. Every day was a good day when you were a Retarded Kitten.
"Now go! And report back! Have the files to us by six-thirty or you will be fired, Jerry!"
[OOC: OCD'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes ... OCD is up. Play on.]
"We have found it!" shouted the other.
They were inside the Activities Area, running around in cheerful circles and flailing their arms. So, just like always, but with happy instead of panic.
"We have discovered the key to decoding the secrets of the universe!"
"It is here! It is ours! We have brought it to you, Jerry!"
"The Rosetta Stone!"
"The Extended Metaphor!"
"The Four for Old Times' Sake!"
"The Seattle Times!"
"The Times New Roman!"
"The Times Old Roman!"
"Behold!" Both Jerries swept their arms dramatically, revealing ...
... an orange-and-white kitten, lounging on a cushion, cheerfully eating a pen.
"THIS IS NO ORDINARY CAT!" cried one Jerry.
"This is ... THE ORACLE!" cried the other.
The Retarded Kitten Oracle yawned and set his chin on his paws. The wig-people were loud and it was his naptime.
"We have asked it many questions, Jerry."
"It always tells the truth!"
"It only tells the truth!"
"It cannot tell a lie!"
"It cannot lie down!"
The Retarded Kitten Oracle blinked a few times. Was it food time?
"For this month's issue of Investigative Abnormalities Weekly, you will be speaking directly with the Oracle. Ask questions about your future, the lottery, the fate of the world!"
"Ask questions about which microwaveable snack treat is transmitting pop songs into your mind."
"Ask questions about yourself, and be amazed at the results!"
The Retarded Kitten Oracle stuck his tongue out a little bit. He was having a good day. Every day was a good day when you were a Retarded Kitten.
"Now go! And report back! Have the files to us by six-thirty or you will be fired, Jerry!"
[OOC: OCD'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes ... OCD is up. Play on.]