And I Will Revel In This Symbiotic Relationship (Girl Meets World/Sense8 Fusion)
Title: And I Will Revel In This Symbiotic Relationship
Author: chicafrom3
Rating: PG
Fandom: Girl Meets World
Characters: Riley Matthews, Maya Hart, Farkle Minkus, Lucas Friar, Zay Babineaux, Isadora Smackle, (minor assorted pairings)
Summary: The thing Riley learns really quickly is that people can adjust to anything.
(Or: Riley, Maya, Farkle, and Lucas are a sensate cluster, and one day they wake up.)
Author's Notes: [Cut for length/light spoilers]This is a fusion with the Netflix series Sense8. It borrows the concept of sensate clusters and associated worldbuilding, but no other plot elements. For purposes of fluff, Whispers and his organization or any like it are not included.
Lucas has been aged down a year and all of the main four now have the same birthday. The Matthews family still lives in Philadelphia, the Friars are still in Austin, and while Maya and Farkle both live in New York City they've never met.
Otherwise, I've done my best to keep character backgrounds and personalities as close to canon as possible, given the AU.
Title is shamelessly stolen from an otherwise unrelated Declan Bennett song.
Additional, slightly more spoilery notes at the end.
Riley Matthews is fourteen years, three months, and twelve days old. She lives in Philadelphia with her mom (a lawyer named Topanaga), her dad (a history teacher named Cory), and her little brother (a lovable pain in the neck named Auggie). Her grandparents live just a couple streets away with her uncle Josh, who's only three years older than Riley is. She has another uncle and two aunts, but Uncle Eric lives in New York State and Aunt Morgan lives in California and nobody ever seems very sure where Aunt Nebula is at any given moment.
Riley is in the eighth grade at John Adams Junior High. She has lots of friends, but not a best friend; she likes a few boys, but she's never been in love. She gets good grades, but she's not at the top of the class; she's well-liked, but not the most popular; she's in drama club and book club and astronomy club and every year she tries out for cheerleading and every year she doesn't make the list. She thinks she has a pretty good life, all things considered.
And then one day, as she's half-dozing through a particularly boring math class, a man appears next to the teacher's desk, and no one else sees him.
Riley doesn't say anything, because she's about sixty percent sure that she's dreaming, but she stares at him, trying to figure out what's going on.
She doesn't know who he is, but something in her head says she should recognize him.
He sees her, and smiles a relieved smile, and then he's gone.
***
Farkle Minkus's dad is worried that his son had a psychotic episode, so Farkle bites his tongue and stops talking about the strange (but not-strange) man on the subway, the man in the black leather jacket despite the heat, who smiled like he'd been looking for Farkle specificially. The man nobody else saw, even when Farkle pointed him out.
He's preoccupied, anyway. The SHSATs are coming up and he's not sure he's ready and if he blows it he's definitely not getting into Bronx Science. And he's had this horrible migraine for days now, which isn't making prepping any easier.
And (and this is the part he won't tell his dad, because he doesn't want another round of psychiatric appointments right now) sometimes everything seems inexplicably wrong. He gets up in the morning to brush his teeth and doesn't recognize the face in the mirror. When he's sitting in the cafeteria working through a math proof, he looks up and for a moment can't remember where he is or how he got there or who the people around him are. One day, he's walking home after school from the subway stop and suddenly can't remember the rest of the route, can't even remember how he got to New York City.
He's lived in Manhattan his whole life.
The episodes never last longer than a minute or so, but they worry him anyway. He knows just enough psychology to know that his symptoms more-or-less match up to some kind of depersonalization disorder, and he knows enough about himself to know that he's not going to tell anyone that. Sometimes depersonalization disorders are serious, chronic problems that follow people for life, but sometimes they're just temporary responses to stress. He's been under plenty of stress. Once he gets into Bronx Science he'll be fine.
So nobody needs to know that he might be going crazy.
***
When the migraine finally breaks, Maya Hart almost cries.
Partly because it's just such a relief to be free of the pain. It's been constant and awful and all she's wanted to do is crawl under a blanket and hide from everything. And now it's finally gone, and she can breathe easily again.
The other part of it, of course, is that her mother's started talking about taking her to a doctor to get checked out, and Maya knows they can't afford that. They can barely afford the rent on the tiny little apartment they moved into after the divorce.
Now she can tell her mom she's okay, and their money problems won't get worse because of her.
She hopes the disorientation will go away with the migraine, but it doesn't. If anything, it gets worse. She overreaches, trying to get things from the top shelf, expecting to be taller than she is. She calls her mom "Mama" and can't explain where that came from. She forgets her favorite English teacher's name; her grilled cheese sandwich tastes like cherry pie; she aces her algebra test, which is probably a good thing except that she didn't study for it at all and when she goes over it later she doesn't understand any of her answers or where she got them or why her sevens don't look like her sevens.
She's kind of scared, not that she'd ever admit it to anyone.
One day she goes into her room to get a new sketchbook and sees a tall brown-haired girl she doesn't know sitting on her bed, brushing her hair and counting the strokes, and Maya blurts out, "How did you get in my room?" but she doesn't even reach the end of the sentence before the girl disappears and her room is empty, and Maya believes she is losing her mind.
***
Lucas Friar tells his best friend Zay, because he tells Zay everything. Zay says it sounds like Lucas is going crazy. Lucas says that isn't helpful.
Zay hugs him and tells him it'll be okay, it's probably just stress and worry about their potential upcoming expulsion to be decided the next day.
Lucas is trying not to think about that. He knows he deserves expulsion. He regrets the fight -- but he couldn't let Zay get hurt, couldn't let those jerks talk shit about him, and he still doesn't know what else he could have done. So he just hugs Zay back and suggests checking in on the horses.
The meeting the next day doesn't go well. They're not expelled, but they are suspended, and this is their last warning. One more incident and they're out. Lucas's father isn't happy, and Lucas is miserable, and the guys who were torturing Zay haven't been punished at all, and basically life would suck even without the whole "potentially losing his mind" thing.
And then, as he's walking down to the pastures to say hello to Delilah, his favorite palomino, someone slams into him from behind and shouts, "Hey, Farkle, watch where you're going!"
Lucas doesn't know what a Farkle is, but it sounds like an insult, and he's had a rough day already. This was supposed to be time to himself, when he could destress and be alone with the horses. So his temper snaps.
He turns, catches the guy under the chin, and shoves him back until he's pinned against the nearest wall, and some part of Lucas's brain notices that he's in a crowded subway station and not outside in a pasture but he's too angry to pay attention.
"What did you say to me?" he snarls in the punk's face.
"Hey," the punk says, surprised, "I was just kidding around, Farkle."
He still says 'Farkle' with a sneer, and Lucas is not placated. He applies increasing pressure on the punk's throat. "You wanna try that again?"
The punk began to choke, clawing at Lucas's grip on his throat, and his expression reminds Lucas of Tony -- Tony who called Zay names, Tony who's still in the hospital, Tony whose mother looked at Lucas with hate -- and, shocked at himself, he lets go and takes a step back.
And just like that he's alone in the pasture, breathing hard. No punk calling him weird names. No subway station.
Oh, God, he really is going crazy.
***
When Riley sees the blonde girl again her heart skips a beat.
She's babysitting Auggie while her parents go out on their monthly date night gag ew. Auggie's watching Mr. Googly on the DVR and Riley is doing her homework at the kitchen table like the good girl she is, and when she looks over to check on her brother the blonde girl is sprawled on the couch drawing with intense focus in a cheap sketchbook.
When Riley catches her breath, she blurts out, "Who are you? What are you doing here?"
The girl almost falls off the couch. She's pretty, Riley notices with a mix of admiration and envy, and she wears ripped jeans and a Rolling Stones tee with the kind of effortless cool Riley will never, ever be able to accomplish, and she says, "What the hell are you doing in my apartment?"
"Your apartment? This is our house."
"Listen," the blonde girl warns, holding her sketchbook up like a weapon, "The guy across the hall used to be a boxer and if I yell he'll be over here in like ten seconds and you'll be really sorry you broke in here -- "
"There's nobody across the hall," Riley says patiently, because even if the blonde girl is crazy that's okay and she doesn't deserve to be talked down to, "This isn't an apartment. It's a house. Teresa's family lives across the street." To prove it she gets up and opens the door and gestures grandly at the front yard.
Auggie gets up and pulls on her shirt and when she looks down at him he says, "Riley, who are you talking to?"
"That g -- " She cuts herself off.
The couch is empty, and there's no trace of the blonde girl anywhere in the house.
She checks. The back door is still locked from the inside.
***
After the incident on the subway -- that's what Farkle's dad calls it, "the incident on the subway" -- most of the school bullies leave him alone. They spread rumors that he's crazy, but it's not like he was super popular before, anyway. Smackle rolls her eyes and suggests that they're projecting.
He doesn't tell her what really happened. She asks, but he just says that he fought back for a change and they backed down, and that fits Smackle's view of the world well enough that she just nods and lets it go.
The truth is, when he thinks back, he thinks that they're probably right and he probably is crazy.
Because what he remembers is a tall sandy-haired boy, a boy who looked an awful lot like Farkle's idea of the perfect teenager, a boy who probably could do magazine covers or whatever, had grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him away from Trent. And then the tall sandy-haired boy had shoved Trent up against the wall and started to strangle him as Trent panicked and his friends didn't know what to do --
And then the tall sandy-haired boy was gone without a trace, and Farkle was the one with his arm pressed against Trent's throat.
The going story is that they pushed him too far and he snapped and this is really why schools should do more to enforce anti-bullying regulations, and Farkle's just going with that because it will sound better on a college application than "psychotic break" or "Dissociative Identity Disorder".
He does some research. Professionals are continually disagreeing with each other about whether or not naturally-occurring DID even exists. So he probably doesn't have that, even if that's the most sensible explanation for the boy who fought off Farkle's tormenters.
Anyway, it didn't feel like a psychotic episode or like multiple personalities. (Which probably just loaned credence to that particular theory. Didn't they always say that crazy people don't know they're crazy?) It felt like the boy had rescued him.
It felt like they were going to see each other again.
***
Maya draws the brown-haired girl a few times, just because the kid has a ridiculous smile and drawing it makes Maya smile.
There's not a whole lot to smile about for Maya, right now. Her mom's lost another waitressing job, and her dad's child support checks haven't come in for a while, and she's probably going to fail history. Not to mention the whole "probably having a nervous breakdown" thing.
But whatever. Paper's cheap and there's always plenty of pencils around the apartment. And the brown-haired girl, hallucination or not, makes her smile.
She goes down to the corner bodega to pick up milk, which they're out of again, and she runs smack into the man in the black leather jacket.
He's not wearing the leather jacket, he's wearing a flannel shirt, but she recognizes him anyway and almost screams.
She doesn't scream. She's Maya Hart. But almost.
He smiles at her, the same relieved smile of recognition as the first time she saw him, and he says, "Maya. I'm so glad to see you. Can we talk?" And then: "We can sit somewhere public."
She knows she should say no. She knows she should call a cop or her mom or the bodega owner. She says, "Let me drop this off at home and I'll meet you at the Americana Diner." It's usually pretty crowded this time of day, and while her mom's working on the other side of the borough right now enough of her coworkers will be around to keep an eye on Maya to make sure nothing bad happens.
But she doesn't get the feeling anything bad is going to happen.
The man nods, and lets her go, and when she's put the milk away at home and run to the Americana he's waiting for her at a table near the front.
He tells her a story.
It explains everything and nothing.
***
Lucas plays sick and stays in bed for the first couple days of his suspension. He's pretty sure his mama knows he's not actually sick, but she thinks he needs a break from the fallout from the Tony situation. She's not totally wrong.
Zay comes by daily to bring any gossip and just to talk; Asher and Dylan call to make sure he's okay and to keep him updated on the schoolwork he's missing. His mama makes him cinnamon toast and fresh orange juice. His father doesn't talk to him. It's pretty okay.
On the third day he goes for a walk and he ends up somewhere he's never been before.
Somewhere that's not in Texas.
The street is crowded and there are people everywhere. He doesn't know where he is, but he feels okay. He feels like he's comfortable here.
Most of the people don't seem to see him, they just walk right past. But one, a girl his age with long brown hair, stops and stares at him, and he feels like he knows her, too.
She leaves the adults she's standing with -- her parents, he feels instinctively -- and comes over to him.
"Hi," she says.
"Hey," he says, and can't stop smiling.
She smiles back, a big ridiculous smile that he loves immediately. "Hi."
"Hey." They both laugh; she ducks her head and he looks around in amazement and says, "This isn't Texas."
"It's Philadelphia. Pennsylvania," she adds.
"I know where Philadelphia is!" He stares up at the buildings surrounding them, even more amazed now. "Is the Liberty Bell near here? I always wanted to see it!"
She laughs at him, but not meanly, and says, "That's on the other side of the city! I'll show you sometimes."
"Awesome."
"Where are you?" she asks, and through her eyes he sees the pasture he was walking through, a few of the horses nearby. So he tells her about Texas and introduces her to Delilah and a few others. She's awed by how much he knows about them.
As long as the conversation lasts, both of them forget to find it strange.
***
The thing Riley learns really quickly is that people can adjust to anything. Even this, whatever 'this' is, stops being weird and starts being her life.
The boy in Texas is Lucas. He wants to be a veterinarian and his face glows when he talks about horses. The pretty blonde girl is Maya, and she's in New York. She's an artist, but she gets embarassed about letting Riley see her sketches, even though they're always amazing. The other boy is in New York, too; his name is Farkle, and he knows everything, and he can always make Riley laugh.
She's never met any of them, but she knows them better than anyone else.
For the first time, she feels like she's got best friends.
Maya's never had a best friend either, and she loves showing Riley around Brooklyn and all her favorite hangouts. She even takes a weekend to show Riley all the New York touristy landmarks like the Statue of Liberty and Coney Island. (Riley loves the Cyclone coaster. She makes Maya ride it with her three times, and when they get off they're both laughing and staggering a little and nobody glances twice at the blonde girl giggling to herself.) In return Riley shows Maya around Philadelphia. They go to all the art museums and galleries and Riley excitedly talks about the day she'll see Maya's art hanging on the walls (and Maya doesn't say anything, but she blushes and Riley knows she likes the idea, too).
Lucas and Farkle already have best friends. Lucas tells Zay about the people in his head, and Zay cracks that he's probably nuts after all but he's always sweet when Lucas tells him that Riley is there with them. Riley likes Zay; he's funny and brash and charming and he's crazy about Lucas. But who wouldn't be?
Farkle's best friend is Smackle. At first Riley tries to call her Isadora instead, because what kind of name is Smackle to call a person, but Farkle insists that Smackle hates her first name so eventually Riley resigns herself to it. Smackle is at least as smart as Farkle, maybe even smarter, and she's tough and steady and, like Zay, not as self-confident as she pretends to be, which Riley can empathize with. Also, she has a massive crush on Farkle, which Farkle refuses to believe Riley or Maya about.
Farkle doesn't tell Smackle about the people in his head because he's afraid she'll tell his father and he'll end up hospitalized or something.
Riley can empathize with that, too. She wants to tell her parents about this amazing thing that's happening to her and how excited she is and how much she loves Maya and Lucas and Farkle and Zay and Smackle and Brooklyn and Manhattan and Austin, and she's pretty sure there's no way to say it that won't make them think she's making it all up.
***
Farkle figures that since he and Maya are in the same city, they should probably meet in the flesh already.
He's the one who's been slowly edging them out of whatever headspace it is that they all share -- Maya says that they're sensates, they're a cluster, they're irrevocably linked -- and establishing real-world connections. He's Skyped with Lucas, which was a wild experience because they were both popping back and forth between a Manhattan penthouse and an Austin horse farm all through the call. He emails Riley cute pictures of kittens and puppies and bunnies and gets excited emojis and punctuation marks in return. He texts Maya regularly even though she never texts him back.
It reassures him, to know that they're all really there. He has hard evidence of their existence outside of his head. He's not crazy after all.
But Maya's just a borough away. They could go get lunch and ride the subway together and he could introduce her to Smackle like a real flesh-and-bone friend. Then he could talk about her casually, without having to make up "this person I met on the internet" stories to explain it.
Maya doesn't want to meet him in person.
He'd feel hurt by that, except their sensate connection means that he can feel her embarrassment every time he pops in on her in her Brooklyn apartment or how intimidated she feels looking around his parents' penthouse. He doesn't know how to explain that he doesn't care about money without making it worse for her. He knows the reason he can afford not to care about money is because he's got it.
But the point is Maya's got all kinds of stuff that he doesn't. Boldness. Self-assurance. Artistic skill. An amazing way with sarcasm. Quick one-liners always on hand. A mom who'd do anything for her.
Farkle's crazy about Maya's mom. And Lucas's mom. And both of Riley's parents. It's not that he doesn't love his own parents, and it's not that they don't love him -- certainly neither of them would ever cut him out of their lives the way Maya's father did with her -- but they're not exactly warm, demonstrative people. They don't hug him the way Topanga Matthews hugs Riley, or make warm chocolate chip cookies for him when he's feeling bad the way Anna Friar makes for Lucas, or work sixteen-hour shifts and then come home and help him with homework the way Katy Hart does without fail for Maya.
But Maya just sees the shiny new laptop Farkle's parents bought him for Easter and the tiny bouquet of Hershey's Kisses her own mom got her, and she feels bad, and Farkle's not good enough at this to fix it for her.
Except sometimes, when he's really upset at the way his parents scream at each other and he goes and hides in his room, Maya walks down to the diner her mom works at and gives her a hug for no reason, and the way Katy's face lights up every time makes everything better for all of them.
***
Maya doesn't like admitting that she needs other people -- she prefers to think of herself as self-sufficient -- but the others in the cluster are very quickly becoming very important to her.
Riley is pretty much everything that Maya is not. She's excitable and high-strung and she puts everything out there -- you never have to wonder how Riley feels about you, because it's written all over her face. She believes the best in people. She believes in happy endings.
In anyone else, Maya would call that naïveté.
In Riley, it's a blessing, and somehow Riley's belief that she can fix things leads to them actually getting fixed. Maya doesn't know how she does it, but she loves her fiercely for it, and she will do anything to preserve Riley's belief in miracles.
And then there's Farkle, and he amazes Maya every day with how little she really understands him. He's so smart, smarter than anybody else she's ever met, and he wants things with an intensity and a focus that she has never, ever allowed herself. Wanting things gets her hurt. Wanting things gets Farkle motivated. And like Riley he loves them all with a clear-eyed faith that leaves Maya shaken, not sure she can live up to it.
And then there's Lucas. She thinks she and Lucas are the most alike, angry and protective and a little ashamed, and maybe that's why when he helps her out it's different than when he helps out the others. He's Farkle's bodyguard, driving off the bullies who try so hard to get under his skin; he's Riley's cheerleader, holding her hand and encouraging her when she needs it; but with Maya he's a guiding hand in a fight, an arm around her chest and a voice in her ear telling her to breathe and think and don't sink down to their level, Maya, that's what they want, you're better than that.
She needs them all, the three of them, and she doesn't know what she'd do without them.
She tries to pay them back -- gives Riley the confidence to go to school in a skirt she loves but is worried she'll be teased for, gives Farkle a snarky line to throw in the face of a too-aggressive competitor, holds Lucas's hand and counts to ten with him while he tries not to react to a classmate picking a fight.
She doesn't think she gives them anything close to what they give her.
But she tries.
***
Zay gets jumped and Lucas isn't there.
It's the weekend and they had plans to meet up for lunch but one of the horses was foaling and Lucas knew Zay would understand. So he wasn't there.
And Zay was jumped, by some of Tony's jerk friends.
Zay's mom calls Lucas's mama. She's crying through the phone call. Lucas's mama hangs up and she doesn't look like she's doing much better but she tells Lucas that Zay's in the hospital and his mom will keep them updated but he can't have visitors right now.
Lucas wants to protest that he's not a visitor, he's family, but instead he nods mutely and goes to bed early.
In Philadelphia, Riley cries on her mother's shoulder and won't explain why. In Manhattan, Farkle surprises his parents by breaking a dinner plate against the table and then running to his room. In Brooklyn, Maya goes for a run, trying to escape the fear stalking on her heels.
In Austin, Lucas doesn't sleep.
When Zay is let out of the hospital, Lucas's mama drives him over to the Babineaux house to see him. Zay's worn out, bandaged up, lying in bed, and Lucas sits next to him and chatters meaninglessly until Zay tires out, because if their roles were reversed Zay would do it for him.
By the time Zay's asleep, though, they're all there, Maya wordless for once with an arm around Lucas's neck, Farkle leaning against him providing new potential topics when Lucas loses his train of thought, and Riley . . .
Riley crawls into bed next to Zay and puts her head down on his chest, feather-light not to cause him more pain, and matches her breathing to his until they all doze off.
When Lucas wakes up, he's lying in bed next to Zay, and it feels like everything's going to be okay.
***
Riley wants to be a princess. She wants to be a cheerleader. She wants to pass Mrs. Grady's biology class. She wants an ice-cream cone. She wants the Phillies to win the Series. She wants Pluto to be considered a planet again. She wants to see space for herself one day. She wants to play Juliet, or Ophelia, or both. She wants glitter pens. She wants Maya's mom to get a good job that she likes and that pays well enough that Maya won't frown and skip lunch to save money, and she wants Maya to be a famous artist. She wants Lucas to walk away from fights without get angry at himself, and she wants Lucas to be a veterinarian who sees newborn animals every day. She wants Farkle's parents to stop screaming at each other, and she wants Farkle to have the courage to admit to his father that he wants to audition for musicals even if it interferes with his schoolwork. She wants Zay to be okay and to stop picking fights and to be happy with himself and to get into that dance program he hasn't admitted to Lucas he applied to. She wants Smackle to confess her feelings to Farkle and for everything to work out with them and for Smackle to feel comfortable in her own skin without needing to be defensive about it. She wants everyone to recognize how amazing everyone Riley loves is and love them the way they deserve.
Riley wants to fix everything for everyone.
Her mom says she gets that from her dad. Her dad says it's not a bad thing, but she should know that some things aren't fixable, and some things people have to fix for themselves.
Riley knows that. But she wants so much.
Riley can't be a princess. She gets rejected from the cheerleading squad year after year. She scrapes by in biology with a B-. The Phillies lose the Series again. Pluto is a dwarf planet and nobody else cares. She's probably not going to be an astronaut. Emily Ryan plays Juliet, and Sarah Laurents plays Ophelia, and Riley plays Juliet's nurse and runs the light board for Hamlet. Maya's mom keeps waitressing at three different diners and barely scraping together enough to cover the bills. Lucas is angry whether he hits the jerks or not. Farkle's mother shouts that she wants a divorce and throws her ring across the room. Zay's mouth runs away with him, and he thinks he's tougher than he is. Smackle beats Farkle at chess and invites him to share a smoothie and doesn't breathe a non-platonic word to him. Maya's teachers tell her how disappointed they are in her schoolwork, and Maya doesn't say a word in response.
She doesn't get an ice cream cone, but she gets a bowl of ice cream, and that's almost as good. And her mom buys her glitter pens with the rest of her back-to-school supplies. And she goes for long walks with Lucas, through Philadelphia city streets and down backroads around Austin at the same time, and they talk about school and the future and how to be there for Zay, and she lets Maya draw her and they giggle about stupid but wonderful stuff together and they visit museums and thrift stores together and learn about art and history and their place in the world, and she helps coax Farkle into going to an audition for Pippin and cheers from the sidelines when he gets a callback.
Maybe she can't have everything she wants. But she can be there for the people she cares most about, and that's worth something, too.
***
Farkle gets into Bronx Science.
It doesn't feel as good as he thought it would (and he insists to himself the fact that the Pippin casting announcement was posted and he's not on it has nothing to do with it), but he celebrates anyway, because he's worked towards it for so long. Anyway, Zay Babineaux has been prounced 100% fit again by a doctor and Katy Hart got a small part in a big movie and Joshua Matthews got his acceptance letter to his dream school NYU, so a celebration seems in order.
Smackle shows up in a dress and nail polish and a nervous smile and for the first time he wonders if maybe Riley and Maya are right about how she feels. She got into Bronx Science, too, so as far as he's concerned it's her party every bit as much as his.
Maya shows up in jeans and a Hello I Rep Brooklyn t-shirt and she's really there, in person, visible to everyone, and Farkle's mom asks, "Who's your new friend?" and he's so excited to see her that he hugs her before he can stop himself.
To her credit, she hugs him back briefly before pushing him in Smackle's direction and introducing herself to Farkle's mom.
Riley and Lucas are there too, but not in the flesh and he can't introduce them to his mom or Smackle. That's okay. It's not like they could just fly across the country on a whim. He's just glad they're there.
It's a pretty decent party, all things considered.
Everyone's happy, which makes Farkle happy.
He sneaks a moment outside to talk to Riley and Lucas without attracting side glances from his mom or Smackle, gets hugged by both of them, and when he goes back inside Maya is deliberately shutting him off from their connection while talking to Smackle in a low, conspiratorial voice.
Is Smackle blushing?
This is probably not a good sign.
For the first time it occurs to Farkle that introducing his best real-world friend to the people in his head might not be quite as great an idea as he thought it was.
At the end of the evening Maya hugs him goodbye and plants a butterfly kiss on his cheek. She hugs Smackle, too, and blows her a kiss, and thanks his mom for including her.
And when Maya's on the subway back to Brooklyn, thinking about the homework she hasn't done and deliberately not thinking about when LaGuardia Arts will get back to her about the portfolio the other three pushed her to put together and submit, Smackle takes a deep breath, thanks Mrs. Minkus for hosting them, and then asks Farkle if he'd like to join her this weekend for a movie and perhaps a smoothie.
He's so surprised, he says yes.
***
Maya's favorite thing about this whole sensate thing might be Riley's family.
It's just that she didn't think families like the Matthews even really existed. Riley's parents go out on date nights and hold hands and kiss in the kitchen before going to work. Her dad turns everything into a lesson, and his lessons are always positive, always a way of guiding his kids to be the best possible people they can be. Her mom fights with everything she has for her children's rights to live and flourish in a world that will be better for them. Her brother draws pictures on the walls and carries his favorite stuffed toy all over the house and crawls into Riley's bed when he has a bad dream. They have game nights and movie nights and whenever Riley has a bad day someone's around to help her feel better or just to listen.
It's like something out of a TV show.
And Riley is always there.
Maya loves Riley's family, and she loves Riley.
She's never been to Philadelphia, but she knows that Matthews house like the back of her hand. She knows how many steps it is to Riley's room, how it's possible to swing out of the window in Riley's room right into the treehouse her uncle Eric built for her when she was seven, how there's always something chocolate in the fridge and Mrs. Matthews is continually trying to grow roses along the front walk but never succeeding.
The cover story is that they all met on the Internet. A forum for middle school students, and they bonded in a discussion and now they chat and email each other and sometimes call, and it's not the best cover story ever but it means that sometimes Maya can tell her mom about something Riley's dad said, or something one of Lucas's horses did, or Farkle's various schemes for power. But it's not enough to explain how intense the connection between them is.
So when Riley's heart is broken -- when a boy she knows spreads rumors that she slept with him and people she thought were her friends begin calling her a slut and giggling behind her back -- and she doesn't tell her parents because she doesn't want to upset them and she cuts the cluster off because she doesn't believe that they can fix this for her (because Riley is the one who fixes people, not the one who is fixed), Maya doesn't even try to explain it to her mom.
Instead she leaves a note on top of the envelope from LaGuardia that she's pretty sure is her acceptance letter and she runs away from home for the first time in her life.
Farkle 'borrows' his dad's credit card and smuggles it out to her. He'd go too, but his dad would chase after him in the way that they both know her mom can't afford to chase after her.
She buys a bus ticket and rides a Greyhound to Philadelphia along with a class trip. The teachers give sporadic history lessons, and she falls asleep with her head on her bookbag.
When she wakes up she's in Philadelphia. The guy unloading luggage from the bus asks if she's ever been to the city before, and when she admits she hasn't he looks concerned and asks if someone's meeting her.
But Maya doesn't need his concern. She knows exactly where she's going.
There's about a million missed calls on her phone from her mom, who's probably having a panic attack, and Maya feels really bad about that but it'll be easier to call her after she's made sure Riley's okay, so she walks all the way to the Matthews house. It's raining by the time she gets to the front door and knocks.
Riley's mom answers. She's just as beautiful and fierce and spectacular in person as she is through Riley's eyes, and Maya can't catch her breath, because it's real now.
"Are you here to see Riley?" Mrs. Matthews repeats, and when Maya still can't answer she turns away and calls, "Riley? I think there's someone here for you."
Riley comes down the stairs, dragging her feet, not at all her usual sunshine and glitter self, and then she sees Maya and freezes.
Maya holds her breath.
Mrs. Matthews looks between her daughter and the soaking wet blonde in the Hamlet t-shirt and says, "She's a friend of yours, isn't she?" and that breaks the spell. Riley flings herself down the stairs and into Maya's arms and then they're wrapped up in each other so tightly it's hard to tell where one begins and the other ends, and Riley is sobbing: "Maya, Maya, you're here, you're really really here."
Maya hangs on for dear life and prays that this moment will last forever.
***
The moment Riley opens herself back up to the cluster, Lucas is doing homework at Zay's with Asher and Dylan. And then a part of his mind that has been dark and empty and cold bursts into sunshine and he has to excuse himself for some air so he doesn't have to explain to the guys why he's about to start crying.
Zay, the only person in Lucas's life who knows what's been going on, follows him out. "So Riley's back?"
Lucas nods, half of himself in a bedroom in Philadelphia.
"She okay?"
"Yeah." He inhales deeply, then hugs Zay, because he can. "We're all okay."
Zay hugs him back. "Tell her I'm here for her, too."
"I will." He does.
He wishes he could be there in person. If only one of them can be, Maya's the best choice -- if Riley needs a flesh-and-blood friend right now, she needs a girl friend and not a guy friend -- but he wishes anyway.
Everything about this whole sensate thing is amazing and he wouldn't trade it for the world. It's given him these three incredible people as part of his life, and the ways they've helped each other -- from driving off Farkle's bullies to getting Maya into the high school she deserves to this thing with Riley to so many others -- are innumerable, and it's been hardly any time at all in the grand scheme of things. He's seen the Liberty Bell with Riley, the Empire State Building with Farkle, Brooklyn Bridge with Maya. He's shown them all Austin; they've watched foals being born with him, they've gone to Zay's defense with him, they've encouraged him to hold his temper and chase his dreams. Before it started he wouldn't have believed it could be real; now he can't imagine going through life without them.
He can't imagine how he would've survived if Riley had never let them back in.
***
Riley's mom is literally the best.
It takes her a minute to actually understand that one of Riley's alleged internet-friends has come all the way from New York to Pennsylvania just because Riley is upset, and another minute to understand why Riley is upset.
But then she kicks into high gear. She calls Maya's mom (who is in full-blown hysterics by then) and calms her down and promises that she and Riley's dad will personally deliver Maya back to her, safe and sound, as soon as the girls have worked out what they need to work out, and Maya takes a few minutes to reassure her mom that she's fine, it honestly was her idea, she'll be back soon, she didn't want to upset her but she really had to get to Riley right away.
Riley doesn't let go of Maya all through that phone call. She's afraid that if she does Maya will go back to just being in her head again.
Once Katy Hart believes her little girl is safe and coming home soon, they all get off the phone and Riley's mom tells Maya that was a really dumb, reckless thing to do, and Riley's dad says, "Yeah, Topanga, you definitely never ran away from Pittsburgh to Philadelphia just to see me," and Riley's mom doesn't blush but she does let the subject drop.
Besides, even though they don't know about the sensate link, they can all see that Riley and Maya's bond is real and it matters and separating them right now, when Riley needs Maya most, would just be unfair.
That night, Riley loans Maya her favorite pajamas and they make popcorn and they watch Red Planet Diaries and fall asleep on the couch. It's not that much different from other movie nights they've had since the cluster woke up, except now Maya's really really here and in the morning she'll still be here even if one of them gets distracted.
It's basically the best night ever.
***
Farkle decides to tell Smackle.
It's kind of an impulse decision. Maya is in Philadelphia with Riley, Lucas has Zay, and, well, he thinks it might be nice to have someone outside the cluster who knows him.
She thinks he's joking, at first, so Lucas calls her from Texas to confirm it, and she still thinks it's a prank. But Lucas describes with perfect accuracy what she's wearing right now, and Zay's in the background yelling "say hello to your headmates for me", and Maya and Riley text a selfie of themselves from Riley's phone with an emoji kiss and the message "HE'S NOT PRANKING YOU WE'RE PSYCHICALLY LINKED".
Once she's convinced it's true, she wants to start running tests, and he has to really push the "this is a secret I'm trusting you with" angle before she reluctantly agrees that she doesn't need brain scans and DNA testing. She still has a bunch of questions about how visiting works, how it's different from sharing, how they're conncted when they're not actively visiting or sharing, how . . .
He doesn't have a lot of answers for her, but between the four of them they manage to satisfy her for the moment.
It's a relief, honestly, to have someone he can talk to about things, and not have to pretend that Maya is just somebody he talked to on the internet or Riley is just somebody a thousand miles away he's never met or Lucas is just a guy in Texas who wouldn't like him if they really knew each other. Somebody who knows how important they all are, and how linked.
Smackle asks if they know about her. Farkle tells her the truth: they all know her, and they all love her, because he does.
She's quiet for a while after that.
***
Maya has to go home when the weekend is over, but she feels better and Riley feels better and everything's out in the open and it was worth it. The Matthews pack up the family car and drive her out to New York, because they're the kind of ridiculous people who will do that for a fourteen-year-old girl they've just met.
They meet up with Maya's mom at the Americana. She looks awful -- she's been crying and her eyes are all red and swollen -- but she smiles when she sees her daughter and Maya feels terrible but doesn't know how to fix it.
But Riley does; she steps neatly into Maya's body and wraps her arms around Katy Hart and says, "I'm sorry, Mom, I'm okay, I promise," and Maya's mom melts. Maya takes over for herself again but doesn't let go of the hug until her mom does; then she looks up and sees Riley smiling brilliantly at them both.
Riley likes fixing things.
Farkle shows up not long after, out of breath and with Smackle in tow, and Riley throws herself into his arms enthusiastically. Riley's dad squints at them with a vaguely perplexed expression; Riley's mom puts an arm around his waist and asks Maya's mom if she minds if the kids hang out for a bit before they go back to Philadelphia.
It's the first time three of them have been in the same physical place at the same time. They cram into a booth, leaving a space for Lucas so he won't feel left out all the way in Texas, and tell Smackle all about the Philadelphia weekend; they talk about LaGuardia Arts and Bronx Science and the public high school Riley will be attending in the fall, and about Lucas's new volunteer work with a veterinary clinic. They talk about anything and everything and nothing, and it's perfect.
***
Lucas hates being so far away from everyone else.
He loves Texas, and he loves the farm, and he's sure he wouldn't be very happy without his mother and the horses and Zay and everything, but with Farkle and Maya hanging out in person all the time and Riley having met them both in the flesh now, he feels a little bit on the outside.
He tries not to show his jealousy, because it's not their fault, but it's hard to keep secrets from people who can feel everything you're feeling.
So they go out of their way to make sure he feels included. Maya tags along during all his chores, even though she's a city girl to the core and can't resist calling him Ranger Roy whenever she sees him with a horse. Farkle always arranges to do his homework with Lucas, even though his assignments are lightyears ahead of Lucas's. And Riley --
Riley's the best of them at multitasking. She has no problems being at home, talking to her brother about his day at school, and being in Austin, going for a ride with Lucas, and being in Brooklyn, giggling with Maya over their favorite TV show, and being in Manhattan, advising Farkle on where to take Smackle for their weekly date, all at the same time and without ever dropping a conversational thread.
Lucas can't do that. He can do his real-world life and be with one of the others wherever they are without getting confused, but no more than that. Farkle's admitted that he's the same. Maya has, with practice, worked herself up to being able to juggle three places at once with only occasional lapses. But Riley can handle all three of them plus her own life without even thinking about it.
Even when Lucas knows Riley is everywhere else, too, he never feels like she's giving him less than all of her attention.
But Lucas's favorite moments are when all four of them get together, wherever that happens to be. The treehouse outside Riley's window is a favorite spot, but it's just as nice in Farkle's favorite bakery, or the subway station near Maya's apartment, or the pasture behind Lucas's house.
It doesn't really matter where they are, in the flesh or in their minds. He just likes all of them being together.
***
The summer passes for Riley in a blur. Part of that is prepping for high school -- a whole new school, full of people who hopefully won't be awful like the people at her middle school she once thought were her friends -- and part of it is the cluster.
Now that Riley's parents know a little bit more about how important Maya and Farkle and Lucas and everyone is (they still don't know the whole story; Riley is still trying to build up her courage to tell them, because she's never kept any major secrets from them ever but how do you tell your parents something like this?) it's easier to explain why she's sometimes excited or devastated about things happening a thousand miles away, and how she's always knowledgeable about events in New York and Texas that haven't made it to the Philly papers yet.
Zay gets into advanced classes at the local ballet school and Riley dances around the Friars' living room with him and Lucas in celebration. Farkle auditions for another musical -- a community theatre production of Into The Woods -- and gets cast this time, as Jack, and Riley holds his hand while he tells his parents. Maya gets in and out of trouble on almost a daily basis and Riley is right there with her every time, leading Lucas to make a crack about good friends bailing you out of jail but best friends sitting in the cell next to you.
Riley is living four lives at once and she can't imagine her life any other way.
The week before she starts classes as a high school freshman, she and Auggie and their parents drive Uncle Josh to New York to see him settled in at school. He's excited and nervous and thrilled to be striking out on his own, and though he doesn't admit it he's clearly happy that his brother and his family are making the trip to help him out.
It takes Lucas a lot of begging but he hasn't been in any trouble at all, all summer and even before that, not since Zay got jumped, and eventually his parents give in and Zay's parents give in and let the two of them take a two-day trip to New York City. Farkle and Maya and Smackle, of course, just have to hop on a subway.
It's the first time they're all together in the flesh and for the space of a heartbeat it's supremely, painfully awkward.
And then Zay smiles flirtatiously at Riley and calls her darlin', and Smackle stammers out a dumbfounded hello to Lucas that makes Farkle doubletake, and Maya pretends to swoon in Josh's direction.
"Hi, Uncle Josh," she says, batting her eyelids at him.
"I'm not your uncle," he tells her, bemused.
"Even better!" And then, to Riley, "I would be your aunt!"
"You're not going to be my aunt," Riley says, but she can't stop smiling.
Maya loops an arm through Josh's and says, "I know you're new to the city and I would just like to volunteer my services as tour guide anytime you like," and Josh laughs uncertainly like he's not sure how seriously to take her, and then Riley's dad chases them all out ostensibly to give Josh some room without soon-to-be-high-schoolers hanging around but really because he knows how much Riley wants to spend time with them.
"Interesting," Smackle says once they're out of earshot and heading towards this coffeehouse Farkle knows. "If Maya and Joshua did become romantically involved, would that be considered incest?"
"Yeah, Maya," Riley says.
Maya makes a face and leans her head on Riley's shoulder. "He's not my uncle."
"But you're psychically linked to his niece. If, for example, you kissed him and Riley happened to experience your feelings -- "
"Okay!" Riley declares, too loudly. "Let's change the subject now!"
The coffeehouse is New York all over and Riley loves it instantly. There's a couple of unoccupied sofas in one corner that they claim, though it takes a while to sort out seating arrangements; Riley ends up on one sofa sandwiched between Maya and Zay, with Lucas, Farkle, and Smackle on the other.
It's weird. When Maya came to see her in Philly, it had seemed to make the lines between them clearer, aside from a few brief moments; Riley had generally been very sure of what feelings were Maya's and which were her own. But here and now, with all four of them together, she's having a hard time sorting out which feelings and impulses are hers and which are someone else's. She puts her head on Zay's shoulder and doesn't know if it's because she felt like it or if it's because that's what Lucas would do. She twines her fingers with Smackle's and wonders if it's because that's what Farkle wants to do, only realizes a few moments later that she used Lucas's hand to do it. She answers the phone when Maya's mom calls to check in and doesn't know if the words come from herself or Maya or one of the boys.
It doesn't matter. She means it, wherever it's coming from.
Zay and Smackle both handle it great, even when one of them starts a sentence and another one finishes it, or they don't even bother finishing it out loud all because they forget they have to. Zay flirts indiscriminately with all of them, making Riley laugh and Maya roll her eyes with a smile and Farkle blush. Smackle is fascinated by their connection, tries to keep notes until Lucas coaxes her phone out of her hand and Farkle throws an arm around the two of them and then she forgets to treat them scientifically.
Riley thinks: If the rest of my life is exactly like this I will never have anything to complain about, and Maya squeezes her hand and smiles at her, and Riley knows she's thinking the same thing.
Additional author's notes: [Cut for length]The guy in the leather jacket is the cluster's "father", but otherwise he's not anybody. I considered making him someone from Boy Meets World but it ultimately felt like pushing the limits of coincidence a little too far.
Riley will tell her parents about the cluster sooner rather than later but it didn't seem to fit into this fic. The Minkus parents, on the other hand, will probably never find out.
Author: chicafrom3
Rating: PG
Fandom: Girl Meets World
Characters: Riley Matthews, Maya Hart, Farkle Minkus, Lucas Friar, Zay Babineaux, Isadora Smackle, (minor assorted pairings)
Summary: The thing Riley learns really quickly is that people can adjust to anything.
(Or: Riley, Maya, Farkle, and Lucas are a sensate cluster, and one day they wake up.)
Author's Notes: [Cut for length/light spoilers]This is a fusion with the Netflix series Sense8. It borrows the concept of sensate clusters and associated worldbuilding, but no other plot elements. For purposes of fluff, Whispers and his organization or any like it are not included.
Lucas has been aged down a year and all of the main four now have the same birthday. The Matthews family still lives in Philadelphia, the Friars are still in Austin, and while Maya and Farkle both live in New York City they've never met.
Otherwise, I've done my best to keep character backgrounds and personalities as close to canon as possible, given the AU.
Title is shamelessly stolen from an otherwise unrelated Declan Bennett song.
Additional, slightly more spoilery notes at the end.
Riley Matthews is fourteen years, three months, and twelve days old. She lives in Philadelphia with her mom (a lawyer named Topanaga), her dad (a history teacher named Cory), and her little brother (a lovable pain in the neck named Auggie). Her grandparents live just a couple streets away with her uncle Josh, who's only three years older than Riley is. She has another uncle and two aunts, but Uncle Eric lives in New York State and Aunt Morgan lives in California and nobody ever seems very sure where Aunt Nebula is at any given moment.
Riley is in the eighth grade at John Adams Junior High. She has lots of friends, but not a best friend; she likes a few boys, but she's never been in love. She gets good grades, but she's not at the top of the class; she's well-liked, but not the most popular; she's in drama club and book club and astronomy club and every year she tries out for cheerleading and every year she doesn't make the list. She thinks she has a pretty good life, all things considered.
And then one day, as she's half-dozing through a particularly boring math class, a man appears next to the teacher's desk, and no one else sees him.
Riley doesn't say anything, because she's about sixty percent sure that she's dreaming, but she stares at him, trying to figure out what's going on.
She doesn't know who he is, but something in her head says she should recognize him.
He sees her, and smiles a relieved smile, and then he's gone.
***
Farkle Minkus's dad is worried that his son had a psychotic episode, so Farkle bites his tongue and stops talking about the strange (but not-strange) man on the subway, the man in the black leather jacket despite the heat, who smiled like he'd been looking for Farkle specificially. The man nobody else saw, even when Farkle pointed him out.
He's preoccupied, anyway. The SHSATs are coming up and he's not sure he's ready and if he blows it he's definitely not getting into Bronx Science. And he's had this horrible migraine for days now, which isn't making prepping any easier.
And (and this is the part he won't tell his dad, because he doesn't want another round of psychiatric appointments right now) sometimes everything seems inexplicably wrong. He gets up in the morning to brush his teeth and doesn't recognize the face in the mirror. When he's sitting in the cafeteria working through a math proof, he looks up and for a moment can't remember where he is or how he got there or who the people around him are. One day, he's walking home after school from the subway stop and suddenly can't remember the rest of the route, can't even remember how he got to New York City.
He's lived in Manhattan his whole life.
The episodes never last longer than a minute or so, but they worry him anyway. He knows just enough psychology to know that his symptoms more-or-less match up to some kind of depersonalization disorder, and he knows enough about himself to know that he's not going to tell anyone that. Sometimes depersonalization disorders are serious, chronic problems that follow people for life, but sometimes they're just temporary responses to stress. He's been under plenty of stress. Once he gets into Bronx Science he'll be fine.
So nobody needs to know that he might be going crazy.
***
When the migraine finally breaks, Maya Hart almost cries.
Partly because it's just such a relief to be free of the pain. It's been constant and awful and all she's wanted to do is crawl under a blanket and hide from everything. And now it's finally gone, and she can breathe easily again.
The other part of it, of course, is that her mother's started talking about taking her to a doctor to get checked out, and Maya knows they can't afford that. They can barely afford the rent on the tiny little apartment they moved into after the divorce.
Now she can tell her mom she's okay, and their money problems won't get worse because of her.
She hopes the disorientation will go away with the migraine, but it doesn't. If anything, it gets worse. She overreaches, trying to get things from the top shelf, expecting to be taller than she is. She calls her mom "Mama" and can't explain where that came from. She forgets her favorite English teacher's name; her grilled cheese sandwich tastes like cherry pie; she aces her algebra test, which is probably a good thing except that she didn't study for it at all and when she goes over it later she doesn't understand any of her answers or where she got them or why her sevens don't look like her sevens.
She's kind of scared, not that she'd ever admit it to anyone.
One day she goes into her room to get a new sketchbook and sees a tall brown-haired girl she doesn't know sitting on her bed, brushing her hair and counting the strokes, and Maya blurts out, "How did you get in my room?" but she doesn't even reach the end of the sentence before the girl disappears and her room is empty, and Maya believes she is losing her mind.
***
Lucas Friar tells his best friend Zay, because he tells Zay everything. Zay says it sounds like Lucas is going crazy. Lucas says that isn't helpful.
Zay hugs him and tells him it'll be okay, it's probably just stress and worry about their potential upcoming expulsion to be decided the next day.
Lucas is trying not to think about that. He knows he deserves expulsion. He regrets the fight -- but he couldn't let Zay get hurt, couldn't let those jerks talk shit about him, and he still doesn't know what else he could have done. So he just hugs Zay back and suggests checking in on the horses.
The meeting the next day doesn't go well. They're not expelled, but they are suspended, and this is their last warning. One more incident and they're out. Lucas's father isn't happy, and Lucas is miserable, and the guys who were torturing Zay haven't been punished at all, and basically life would suck even without the whole "potentially losing his mind" thing.
And then, as he's walking down to the pastures to say hello to Delilah, his favorite palomino, someone slams into him from behind and shouts, "Hey, Farkle, watch where you're going!"
Lucas doesn't know what a Farkle is, but it sounds like an insult, and he's had a rough day already. This was supposed to be time to himself, when he could destress and be alone with the horses. So his temper snaps.
He turns, catches the guy under the chin, and shoves him back until he's pinned against the nearest wall, and some part of Lucas's brain notices that he's in a crowded subway station and not outside in a pasture but he's too angry to pay attention.
"What did you say to me?" he snarls in the punk's face.
"Hey," the punk says, surprised, "I was just kidding around, Farkle."
He still says 'Farkle' with a sneer, and Lucas is not placated. He applies increasing pressure on the punk's throat. "You wanna try that again?"
The punk began to choke, clawing at Lucas's grip on his throat, and his expression reminds Lucas of Tony -- Tony who called Zay names, Tony who's still in the hospital, Tony whose mother looked at Lucas with hate -- and, shocked at himself, he lets go and takes a step back.
And just like that he's alone in the pasture, breathing hard. No punk calling him weird names. No subway station.
Oh, God, he really is going crazy.
***
When Riley sees the blonde girl again her heart skips a beat.
She's babysitting Auggie while her parents go out on their monthly date night gag ew. Auggie's watching Mr. Googly on the DVR and Riley is doing her homework at the kitchen table like the good girl she is, and when she looks over to check on her brother the blonde girl is sprawled on the couch drawing with intense focus in a cheap sketchbook.
When Riley catches her breath, she blurts out, "Who are you? What are you doing here?"
The girl almost falls off the couch. She's pretty, Riley notices with a mix of admiration and envy, and she wears ripped jeans and a Rolling Stones tee with the kind of effortless cool Riley will never, ever be able to accomplish, and she says, "What the hell are you doing in my apartment?"
"Your apartment? This is our house."
"Listen," the blonde girl warns, holding her sketchbook up like a weapon, "The guy across the hall used to be a boxer and if I yell he'll be over here in like ten seconds and you'll be really sorry you broke in here -- "
"There's nobody across the hall," Riley says patiently, because even if the blonde girl is crazy that's okay and she doesn't deserve to be talked down to, "This isn't an apartment. It's a house. Teresa's family lives across the street." To prove it she gets up and opens the door and gestures grandly at the front yard.
Auggie gets up and pulls on her shirt and when she looks down at him he says, "Riley, who are you talking to?"
"That g -- " She cuts herself off.
The couch is empty, and there's no trace of the blonde girl anywhere in the house.
She checks. The back door is still locked from the inside.
***
After the incident on the subway -- that's what Farkle's dad calls it, "the incident on the subway" -- most of the school bullies leave him alone. They spread rumors that he's crazy, but it's not like he was super popular before, anyway. Smackle rolls her eyes and suggests that they're projecting.
He doesn't tell her what really happened. She asks, but he just says that he fought back for a change and they backed down, and that fits Smackle's view of the world well enough that she just nods and lets it go.
The truth is, when he thinks back, he thinks that they're probably right and he probably is crazy.
Because what he remembers is a tall sandy-haired boy, a boy who looked an awful lot like Farkle's idea of the perfect teenager, a boy who probably could do magazine covers or whatever, had grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him away from Trent. And then the tall sandy-haired boy had shoved Trent up against the wall and started to strangle him as Trent panicked and his friends didn't know what to do --
And then the tall sandy-haired boy was gone without a trace, and Farkle was the one with his arm pressed against Trent's throat.
The going story is that they pushed him too far and he snapped and this is really why schools should do more to enforce anti-bullying regulations, and Farkle's just going with that because it will sound better on a college application than "psychotic break" or "Dissociative Identity Disorder".
He does some research. Professionals are continually disagreeing with each other about whether or not naturally-occurring DID even exists. So he probably doesn't have that, even if that's the most sensible explanation for the boy who fought off Farkle's tormenters.
Anyway, it didn't feel like a psychotic episode or like multiple personalities. (Which probably just loaned credence to that particular theory. Didn't they always say that crazy people don't know they're crazy?) It felt like the boy had rescued him.
It felt like they were going to see each other again.
***
Maya draws the brown-haired girl a few times, just because the kid has a ridiculous smile and drawing it makes Maya smile.
There's not a whole lot to smile about for Maya, right now. Her mom's lost another waitressing job, and her dad's child support checks haven't come in for a while, and she's probably going to fail history. Not to mention the whole "probably having a nervous breakdown" thing.
But whatever. Paper's cheap and there's always plenty of pencils around the apartment. And the brown-haired girl, hallucination or not, makes her smile.
She goes down to the corner bodega to pick up milk, which they're out of again, and she runs smack into the man in the black leather jacket.
He's not wearing the leather jacket, he's wearing a flannel shirt, but she recognizes him anyway and almost screams.
She doesn't scream. She's Maya Hart. But almost.
He smiles at her, the same relieved smile of recognition as the first time she saw him, and he says, "Maya. I'm so glad to see you. Can we talk?" And then: "We can sit somewhere public."
She knows she should say no. She knows she should call a cop or her mom or the bodega owner. She says, "Let me drop this off at home and I'll meet you at the Americana Diner." It's usually pretty crowded this time of day, and while her mom's working on the other side of the borough right now enough of her coworkers will be around to keep an eye on Maya to make sure nothing bad happens.
But she doesn't get the feeling anything bad is going to happen.
The man nods, and lets her go, and when she's put the milk away at home and run to the Americana he's waiting for her at a table near the front.
He tells her a story.
It explains everything and nothing.
***
Lucas plays sick and stays in bed for the first couple days of his suspension. He's pretty sure his mama knows he's not actually sick, but she thinks he needs a break from the fallout from the Tony situation. She's not totally wrong.
Zay comes by daily to bring any gossip and just to talk; Asher and Dylan call to make sure he's okay and to keep him updated on the schoolwork he's missing. His mama makes him cinnamon toast and fresh orange juice. His father doesn't talk to him. It's pretty okay.
On the third day he goes for a walk and he ends up somewhere he's never been before.
Somewhere that's not in Texas.
The street is crowded and there are people everywhere. He doesn't know where he is, but he feels okay. He feels like he's comfortable here.
Most of the people don't seem to see him, they just walk right past. But one, a girl his age with long brown hair, stops and stares at him, and he feels like he knows her, too.
She leaves the adults she's standing with -- her parents, he feels instinctively -- and comes over to him.
"Hi," she says.
"Hey," he says, and can't stop smiling.
She smiles back, a big ridiculous smile that he loves immediately. "Hi."
"Hey." They both laugh; she ducks her head and he looks around in amazement and says, "This isn't Texas."
"It's Philadelphia. Pennsylvania," she adds.
"I know where Philadelphia is!" He stares up at the buildings surrounding them, even more amazed now. "Is the Liberty Bell near here? I always wanted to see it!"
She laughs at him, but not meanly, and says, "That's on the other side of the city! I'll show you sometimes."
"Awesome."
"Where are you?" she asks, and through her eyes he sees the pasture he was walking through, a few of the horses nearby. So he tells her about Texas and introduces her to Delilah and a few others. She's awed by how much he knows about them.
As long as the conversation lasts, both of them forget to find it strange.
***
The thing Riley learns really quickly is that people can adjust to anything. Even this, whatever 'this' is, stops being weird and starts being her life.
The boy in Texas is Lucas. He wants to be a veterinarian and his face glows when he talks about horses. The pretty blonde girl is Maya, and she's in New York. She's an artist, but she gets embarassed about letting Riley see her sketches, even though they're always amazing. The other boy is in New York, too; his name is Farkle, and he knows everything, and he can always make Riley laugh.
She's never met any of them, but she knows them better than anyone else.
For the first time, she feels like she's got best friends.
Maya's never had a best friend either, and she loves showing Riley around Brooklyn and all her favorite hangouts. She even takes a weekend to show Riley all the New York touristy landmarks like the Statue of Liberty and Coney Island. (Riley loves the Cyclone coaster. She makes Maya ride it with her three times, and when they get off they're both laughing and staggering a little and nobody glances twice at the blonde girl giggling to herself.) In return Riley shows Maya around Philadelphia. They go to all the art museums and galleries and Riley excitedly talks about the day she'll see Maya's art hanging on the walls (and Maya doesn't say anything, but she blushes and Riley knows she likes the idea, too).
Lucas and Farkle already have best friends. Lucas tells Zay about the people in his head, and Zay cracks that he's probably nuts after all but he's always sweet when Lucas tells him that Riley is there with them. Riley likes Zay; he's funny and brash and charming and he's crazy about Lucas. But who wouldn't be?
Farkle's best friend is Smackle. At first Riley tries to call her Isadora instead, because what kind of name is Smackle to call a person, but Farkle insists that Smackle hates her first name so eventually Riley resigns herself to it. Smackle is at least as smart as Farkle, maybe even smarter, and she's tough and steady and, like Zay, not as self-confident as she pretends to be, which Riley can empathize with. Also, she has a massive crush on Farkle, which Farkle refuses to believe Riley or Maya about.
Farkle doesn't tell Smackle about the people in his head because he's afraid she'll tell his father and he'll end up hospitalized or something.
Riley can empathize with that, too. She wants to tell her parents about this amazing thing that's happening to her and how excited she is and how much she loves Maya and Lucas and Farkle and Zay and Smackle and Brooklyn and Manhattan and Austin, and she's pretty sure there's no way to say it that won't make them think she's making it all up.
***
Farkle figures that since he and Maya are in the same city, they should probably meet in the flesh already.
He's the one who's been slowly edging them out of whatever headspace it is that they all share -- Maya says that they're sensates, they're a cluster, they're irrevocably linked -- and establishing real-world connections. He's Skyped with Lucas, which was a wild experience because they were both popping back and forth between a Manhattan penthouse and an Austin horse farm all through the call. He emails Riley cute pictures of kittens and puppies and bunnies and gets excited emojis and punctuation marks in return. He texts Maya regularly even though she never texts him back.
It reassures him, to know that they're all really there. He has hard evidence of their existence outside of his head. He's not crazy after all.
But Maya's just a borough away. They could go get lunch and ride the subway together and he could introduce her to Smackle like a real flesh-and-bone friend. Then he could talk about her casually, without having to make up "this person I met on the internet" stories to explain it.
Maya doesn't want to meet him in person.
He'd feel hurt by that, except their sensate connection means that he can feel her embarrassment every time he pops in on her in her Brooklyn apartment or how intimidated she feels looking around his parents' penthouse. He doesn't know how to explain that he doesn't care about money without making it worse for her. He knows the reason he can afford not to care about money is because he's got it.
But the point is Maya's got all kinds of stuff that he doesn't. Boldness. Self-assurance. Artistic skill. An amazing way with sarcasm. Quick one-liners always on hand. A mom who'd do anything for her.
Farkle's crazy about Maya's mom. And Lucas's mom. And both of Riley's parents. It's not that he doesn't love his own parents, and it's not that they don't love him -- certainly neither of them would ever cut him out of their lives the way Maya's father did with her -- but they're not exactly warm, demonstrative people. They don't hug him the way Topanga Matthews hugs Riley, or make warm chocolate chip cookies for him when he's feeling bad the way Anna Friar makes for Lucas, or work sixteen-hour shifts and then come home and help him with homework the way Katy Hart does without fail for Maya.
But Maya just sees the shiny new laptop Farkle's parents bought him for Easter and the tiny bouquet of Hershey's Kisses her own mom got her, and she feels bad, and Farkle's not good enough at this to fix it for her.
Except sometimes, when he's really upset at the way his parents scream at each other and he goes and hides in his room, Maya walks down to the diner her mom works at and gives her a hug for no reason, and the way Katy's face lights up every time makes everything better for all of them.
***
Maya doesn't like admitting that she needs other people -- she prefers to think of herself as self-sufficient -- but the others in the cluster are very quickly becoming very important to her.
Riley is pretty much everything that Maya is not. She's excitable and high-strung and she puts everything out there -- you never have to wonder how Riley feels about you, because it's written all over her face. She believes the best in people. She believes in happy endings.
In anyone else, Maya would call that naïveté.
In Riley, it's a blessing, and somehow Riley's belief that she can fix things leads to them actually getting fixed. Maya doesn't know how she does it, but she loves her fiercely for it, and she will do anything to preserve Riley's belief in miracles.
And then there's Farkle, and he amazes Maya every day with how little she really understands him. He's so smart, smarter than anybody else she's ever met, and he wants things with an intensity and a focus that she has never, ever allowed herself. Wanting things gets her hurt. Wanting things gets Farkle motivated. And like Riley he loves them all with a clear-eyed faith that leaves Maya shaken, not sure she can live up to it.
And then there's Lucas. She thinks she and Lucas are the most alike, angry and protective and a little ashamed, and maybe that's why when he helps her out it's different than when he helps out the others. He's Farkle's bodyguard, driving off the bullies who try so hard to get under his skin; he's Riley's cheerleader, holding her hand and encouraging her when she needs it; but with Maya he's a guiding hand in a fight, an arm around her chest and a voice in her ear telling her to breathe and think and don't sink down to their level, Maya, that's what they want, you're better than that.
She needs them all, the three of them, and she doesn't know what she'd do without them.
She tries to pay them back -- gives Riley the confidence to go to school in a skirt she loves but is worried she'll be teased for, gives Farkle a snarky line to throw in the face of a too-aggressive competitor, holds Lucas's hand and counts to ten with him while he tries not to react to a classmate picking a fight.
She doesn't think she gives them anything close to what they give her.
But she tries.
***
Zay gets jumped and Lucas isn't there.
It's the weekend and they had plans to meet up for lunch but one of the horses was foaling and Lucas knew Zay would understand. So he wasn't there.
And Zay was jumped, by some of Tony's jerk friends.
Zay's mom calls Lucas's mama. She's crying through the phone call. Lucas's mama hangs up and she doesn't look like she's doing much better but she tells Lucas that Zay's in the hospital and his mom will keep them updated but he can't have visitors right now.
Lucas wants to protest that he's not a visitor, he's family, but instead he nods mutely and goes to bed early.
In Philadelphia, Riley cries on her mother's shoulder and won't explain why. In Manhattan, Farkle surprises his parents by breaking a dinner plate against the table and then running to his room. In Brooklyn, Maya goes for a run, trying to escape the fear stalking on her heels.
In Austin, Lucas doesn't sleep.
When Zay is let out of the hospital, Lucas's mama drives him over to the Babineaux house to see him. Zay's worn out, bandaged up, lying in bed, and Lucas sits next to him and chatters meaninglessly until Zay tires out, because if their roles were reversed Zay would do it for him.
By the time Zay's asleep, though, they're all there, Maya wordless for once with an arm around Lucas's neck, Farkle leaning against him providing new potential topics when Lucas loses his train of thought, and Riley . . .
Riley crawls into bed next to Zay and puts her head down on his chest, feather-light not to cause him more pain, and matches her breathing to his until they all doze off.
When Lucas wakes up, he's lying in bed next to Zay, and it feels like everything's going to be okay.
***
Riley wants to be a princess. She wants to be a cheerleader. She wants to pass Mrs. Grady's biology class. She wants an ice-cream cone. She wants the Phillies to win the Series. She wants Pluto to be considered a planet again. She wants to see space for herself one day. She wants to play Juliet, or Ophelia, or both. She wants glitter pens. She wants Maya's mom to get a good job that she likes and that pays well enough that Maya won't frown and skip lunch to save money, and she wants Maya to be a famous artist. She wants Lucas to walk away from fights without get angry at himself, and she wants Lucas to be a veterinarian who sees newborn animals every day. She wants Farkle's parents to stop screaming at each other, and she wants Farkle to have the courage to admit to his father that he wants to audition for musicals even if it interferes with his schoolwork. She wants Zay to be okay and to stop picking fights and to be happy with himself and to get into that dance program he hasn't admitted to Lucas he applied to. She wants Smackle to confess her feelings to Farkle and for everything to work out with them and for Smackle to feel comfortable in her own skin without needing to be defensive about it. She wants everyone to recognize how amazing everyone Riley loves is and love them the way they deserve.
Riley wants to fix everything for everyone.
Her mom says she gets that from her dad. Her dad says it's not a bad thing, but she should know that some things aren't fixable, and some things people have to fix for themselves.
Riley knows that. But she wants so much.
Riley can't be a princess. She gets rejected from the cheerleading squad year after year. She scrapes by in biology with a B-. The Phillies lose the Series again. Pluto is a dwarf planet and nobody else cares. She's probably not going to be an astronaut. Emily Ryan plays Juliet, and Sarah Laurents plays Ophelia, and Riley plays Juliet's nurse and runs the light board for Hamlet. Maya's mom keeps waitressing at three different diners and barely scraping together enough to cover the bills. Lucas is angry whether he hits the jerks or not. Farkle's mother shouts that she wants a divorce and throws her ring across the room. Zay's mouth runs away with him, and he thinks he's tougher than he is. Smackle beats Farkle at chess and invites him to share a smoothie and doesn't breathe a non-platonic word to him. Maya's teachers tell her how disappointed they are in her schoolwork, and Maya doesn't say a word in response.
She doesn't get an ice cream cone, but she gets a bowl of ice cream, and that's almost as good. And her mom buys her glitter pens with the rest of her back-to-school supplies. And she goes for long walks with Lucas, through Philadelphia city streets and down backroads around Austin at the same time, and they talk about school and the future and how to be there for Zay, and she lets Maya draw her and they giggle about stupid but wonderful stuff together and they visit museums and thrift stores together and learn about art and history and their place in the world, and she helps coax Farkle into going to an audition for Pippin and cheers from the sidelines when he gets a callback.
Maybe she can't have everything she wants. But she can be there for the people she cares most about, and that's worth something, too.
***
Farkle gets into Bronx Science.
It doesn't feel as good as he thought it would (and he insists to himself the fact that the Pippin casting announcement was posted and he's not on it has nothing to do with it), but he celebrates anyway, because he's worked towards it for so long. Anyway, Zay Babineaux has been prounced 100% fit again by a doctor and Katy Hart got a small part in a big movie and Joshua Matthews got his acceptance letter to his dream school NYU, so a celebration seems in order.
Smackle shows up in a dress and nail polish and a nervous smile and for the first time he wonders if maybe Riley and Maya are right about how she feels. She got into Bronx Science, too, so as far as he's concerned it's her party every bit as much as his.
Maya shows up in jeans and a Hello I Rep Brooklyn t-shirt and she's really there, in person, visible to everyone, and Farkle's mom asks, "Who's your new friend?" and he's so excited to see her that he hugs her before he can stop himself.
To her credit, she hugs him back briefly before pushing him in Smackle's direction and introducing herself to Farkle's mom.
Riley and Lucas are there too, but not in the flesh and he can't introduce them to his mom or Smackle. That's okay. It's not like they could just fly across the country on a whim. He's just glad they're there.
It's a pretty decent party, all things considered.
Everyone's happy, which makes Farkle happy.
He sneaks a moment outside to talk to Riley and Lucas without attracting side glances from his mom or Smackle, gets hugged by both of them, and when he goes back inside Maya is deliberately shutting him off from their connection while talking to Smackle in a low, conspiratorial voice.
Is Smackle blushing?
This is probably not a good sign.
For the first time it occurs to Farkle that introducing his best real-world friend to the people in his head might not be quite as great an idea as he thought it was.
At the end of the evening Maya hugs him goodbye and plants a butterfly kiss on his cheek. She hugs Smackle, too, and blows her a kiss, and thanks his mom for including her.
And when Maya's on the subway back to Brooklyn, thinking about the homework she hasn't done and deliberately not thinking about when LaGuardia Arts will get back to her about the portfolio the other three pushed her to put together and submit, Smackle takes a deep breath, thanks Mrs. Minkus for hosting them, and then asks Farkle if he'd like to join her this weekend for a movie and perhaps a smoothie.
He's so surprised, he says yes.
***
Maya's favorite thing about this whole sensate thing might be Riley's family.
It's just that she didn't think families like the Matthews even really existed. Riley's parents go out on date nights and hold hands and kiss in the kitchen before going to work. Her dad turns everything into a lesson, and his lessons are always positive, always a way of guiding his kids to be the best possible people they can be. Her mom fights with everything she has for her children's rights to live and flourish in a world that will be better for them. Her brother draws pictures on the walls and carries his favorite stuffed toy all over the house and crawls into Riley's bed when he has a bad dream. They have game nights and movie nights and whenever Riley has a bad day someone's around to help her feel better or just to listen.
It's like something out of a TV show.
And Riley is always there.
Maya loves Riley's family, and she loves Riley.
She's never been to Philadelphia, but she knows that Matthews house like the back of her hand. She knows how many steps it is to Riley's room, how it's possible to swing out of the window in Riley's room right into the treehouse her uncle Eric built for her when she was seven, how there's always something chocolate in the fridge and Mrs. Matthews is continually trying to grow roses along the front walk but never succeeding.
The cover story is that they all met on the Internet. A forum for middle school students, and they bonded in a discussion and now they chat and email each other and sometimes call, and it's not the best cover story ever but it means that sometimes Maya can tell her mom about something Riley's dad said, or something one of Lucas's horses did, or Farkle's various schemes for power. But it's not enough to explain how intense the connection between them is.
So when Riley's heart is broken -- when a boy she knows spreads rumors that she slept with him and people she thought were her friends begin calling her a slut and giggling behind her back -- and she doesn't tell her parents because she doesn't want to upset them and she cuts the cluster off because she doesn't believe that they can fix this for her (because Riley is the one who fixes people, not the one who is fixed), Maya doesn't even try to explain it to her mom.
Instead she leaves a note on top of the envelope from LaGuardia that she's pretty sure is her acceptance letter and she runs away from home for the first time in her life.
Farkle 'borrows' his dad's credit card and smuggles it out to her. He'd go too, but his dad would chase after him in the way that they both know her mom can't afford to chase after her.
She buys a bus ticket and rides a Greyhound to Philadelphia along with a class trip. The teachers give sporadic history lessons, and she falls asleep with her head on her bookbag.
When she wakes up she's in Philadelphia. The guy unloading luggage from the bus asks if she's ever been to the city before, and when she admits she hasn't he looks concerned and asks if someone's meeting her.
But Maya doesn't need his concern. She knows exactly where she's going.
There's about a million missed calls on her phone from her mom, who's probably having a panic attack, and Maya feels really bad about that but it'll be easier to call her after she's made sure Riley's okay, so she walks all the way to the Matthews house. It's raining by the time she gets to the front door and knocks.
Riley's mom answers. She's just as beautiful and fierce and spectacular in person as she is through Riley's eyes, and Maya can't catch her breath, because it's real now.
"Are you here to see Riley?" Mrs. Matthews repeats, and when Maya still can't answer she turns away and calls, "Riley? I think there's someone here for you."
Riley comes down the stairs, dragging her feet, not at all her usual sunshine and glitter self, and then she sees Maya and freezes.
Maya holds her breath.
Mrs. Matthews looks between her daughter and the soaking wet blonde in the Hamlet t-shirt and says, "She's a friend of yours, isn't she?" and that breaks the spell. Riley flings herself down the stairs and into Maya's arms and then they're wrapped up in each other so tightly it's hard to tell where one begins and the other ends, and Riley is sobbing: "Maya, Maya, you're here, you're really really here."
Maya hangs on for dear life and prays that this moment will last forever.
***
The moment Riley opens herself back up to the cluster, Lucas is doing homework at Zay's with Asher and Dylan. And then a part of his mind that has been dark and empty and cold bursts into sunshine and he has to excuse himself for some air so he doesn't have to explain to the guys why he's about to start crying.
Zay, the only person in Lucas's life who knows what's been going on, follows him out. "So Riley's back?"
Lucas nods, half of himself in a bedroom in Philadelphia.
"She okay?"
"Yeah." He inhales deeply, then hugs Zay, because he can. "We're all okay."
Zay hugs him back. "Tell her I'm here for her, too."
"I will." He does.
He wishes he could be there in person. If only one of them can be, Maya's the best choice -- if Riley needs a flesh-and-blood friend right now, she needs a girl friend and not a guy friend -- but he wishes anyway.
Everything about this whole sensate thing is amazing and he wouldn't trade it for the world. It's given him these three incredible people as part of his life, and the ways they've helped each other -- from driving off Farkle's bullies to getting Maya into the high school she deserves to this thing with Riley to so many others -- are innumerable, and it's been hardly any time at all in the grand scheme of things. He's seen the Liberty Bell with Riley, the Empire State Building with Farkle, Brooklyn Bridge with Maya. He's shown them all Austin; they've watched foals being born with him, they've gone to Zay's defense with him, they've encouraged him to hold his temper and chase his dreams. Before it started he wouldn't have believed it could be real; now he can't imagine going through life without them.
He can't imagine how he would've survived if Riley had never let them back in.
***
Riley's mom is literally the best.
It takes her a minute to actually understand that one of Riley's alleged internet-friends has come all the way from New York to Pennsylvania just because Riley is upset, and another minute to understand why Riley is upset.
But then she kicks into high gear. She calls Maya's mom (who is in full-blown hysterics by then) and calms her down and promises that she and Riley's dad will personally deliver Maya back to her, safe and sound, as soon as the girls have worked out what they need to work out, and Maya takes a few minutes to reassure her mom that she's fine, it honestly was her idea, she'll be back soon, she didn't want to upset her but she really had to get to Riley right away.
Riley doesn't let go of Maya all through that phone call. She's afraid that if she does Maya will go back to just being in her head again.
Once Katy Hart believes her little girl is safe and coming home soon, they all get off the phone and Riley's mom tells Maya that was a really dumb, reckless thing to do, and Riley's dad says, "Yeah, Topanga, you definitely never ran away from Pittsburgh to Philadelphia just to see me," and Riley's mom doesn't blush but she does let the subject drop.
Besides, even though they don't know about the sensate link, they can all see that Riley and Maya's bond is real and it matters and separating them right now, when Riley needs Maya most, would just be unfair.
That night, Riley loans Maya her favorite pajamas and they make popcorn and they watch Red Planet Diaries and fall asleep on the couch. It's not that much different from other movie nights they've had since the cluster woke up, except now Maya's really really here and in the morning she'll still be here even if one of them gets distracted.
It's basically the best night ever.
***
Farkle decides to tell Smackle.
It's kind of an impulse decision. Maya is in Philadelphia with Riley, Lucas has Zay, and, well, he thinks it might be nice to have someone outside the cluster who knows him.
She thinks he's joking, at first, so Lucas calls her from Texas to confirm it, and she still thinks it's a prank. But Lucas describes with perfect accuracy what she's wearing right now, and Zay's in the background yelling "say hello to your headmates for me", and Maya and Riley text a selfie of themselves from Riley's phone with an emoji kiss and the message "HE'S NOT PRANKING YOU WE'RE PSYCHICALLY LINKED".
Once she's convinced it's true, she wants to start running tests, and he has to really push the "this is a secret I'm trusting you with" angle before she reluctantly agrees that she doesn't need brain scans and DNA testing. She still has a bunch of questions about how visiting works, how it's different from sharing, how they're conncted when they're not actively visiting or sharing, how . . .
He doesn't have a lot of answers for her, but between the four of them they manage to satisfy her for the moment.
It's a relief, honestly, to have someone he can talk to about things, and not have to pretend that Maya is just somebody he talked to on the internet or Riley is just somebody a thousand miles away he's never met or Lucas is just a guy in Texas who wouldn't like him if they really knew each other. Somebody who knows how important they all are, and how linked.
Smackle asks if they know about her. Farkle tells her the truth: they all know her, and they all love her, because he does.
She's quiet for a while after that.
***
Maya has to go home when the weekend is over, but she feels better and Riley feels better and everything's out in the open and it was worth it. The Matthews pack up the family car and drive her out to New York, because they're the kind of ridiculous people who will do that for a fourteen-year-old girl they've just met.
They meet up with Maya's mom at the Americana. She looks awful -- she's been crying and her eyes are all red and swollen -- but she smiles when she sees her daughter and Maya feels terrible but doesn't know how to fix it.
But Riley does; she steps neatly into Maya's body and wraps her arms around Katy Hart and says, "I'm sorry, Mom, I'm okay, I promise," and Maya's mom melts. Maya takes over for herself again but doesn't let go of the hug until her mom does; then she looks up and sees Riley smiling brilliantly at them both.
Riley likes fixing things.
Farkle shows up not long after, out of breath and with Smackle in tow, and Riley throws herself into his arms enthusiastically. Riley's dad squints at them with a vaguely perplexed expression; Riley's mom puts an arm around his waist and asks Maya's mom if she minds if the kids hang out for a bit before they go back to Philadelphia.
It's the first time three of them have been in the same physical place at the same time. They cram into a booth, leaving a space for Lucas so he won't feel left out all the way in Texas, and tell Smackle all about the Philadelphia weekend; they talk about LaGuardia Arts and Bronx Science and the public high school Riley will be attending in the fall, and about Lucas's new volunteer work with a veterinary clinic. They talk about anything and everything and nothing, and it's perfect.
***
Lucas hates being so far away from everyone else.
He loves Texas, and he loves the farm, and he's sure he wouldn't be very happy without his mother and the horses and Zay and everything, but with Farkle and Maya hanging out in person all the time and Riley having met them both in the flesh now, he feels a little bit on the outside.
He tries not to show his jealousy, because it's not their fault, but it's hard to keep secrets from people who can feel everything you're feeling.
So they go out of their way to make sure he feels included. Maya tags along during all his chores, even though she's a city girl to the core and can't resist calling him Ranger Roy whenever she sees him with a horse. Farkle always arranges to do his homework with Lucas, even though his assignments are lightyears ahead of Lucas's. And Riley --
Riley's the best of them at multitasking. She has no problems being at home, talking to her brother about his day at school, and being in Austin, going for a ride with Lucas, and being in Brooklyn, giggling with Maya over their favorite TV show, and being in Manhattan, advising Farkle on where to take Smackle for their weekly date, all at the same time and without ever dropping a conversational thread.
Lucas can't do that. He can do his real-world life and be with one of the others wherever they are without getting confused, but no more than that. Farkle's admitted that he's the same. Maya has, with practice, worked herself up to being able to juggle three places at once with only occasional lapses. But Riley can handle all three of them plus her own life without even thinking about it.
Even when Lucas knows Riley is everywhere else, too, he never feels like she's giving him less than all of her attention.
But Lucas's favorite moments are when all four of them get together, wherever that happens to be. The treehouse outside Riley's window is a favorite spot, but it's just as nice in Farkle's favorite bakery, or the subway station near Maya's apartment, or the pasture behind Lucas's house.
It doesn't really matter where they are, in the flesh or in their minds. He just likes all of them being together.
***
The summer passes for Riley in a blur. Part of that is prepping for high school -- a whole new school, full of people who hopefully won't be awful like the people at her middle school she once thought were her friends -- and part of it is the cluster.
Now that Riley's parents know a little bit more about how important Maya and Farkle and Lucas and everyone is (they still don't know the whole story; Riley is still trying to build up her courage to tell them, because she's never kept any major secrets from them ever but how do you tell your parents something like this?) it's easier to explain why she's sometimes excited or devastated about things happening a thousand miles away, and how she's always knowledgeable about events in New York and Texas that haven't made it to the Philly papers yet.
Zay gets into advanced classes at the local ballet school and Riley dances around the Friars' living room with him and Lucas in celebration. Farkle auditions for another musical -- a community theatre production of Into The Woods -- and gets cast this time, as Jack, and Riley holds his hand while he tells his parents. Maya gets in and out of trouble on almost a daily basis and Riley is right there with her every time, leading Lucas to make a crack about good friends bailing you out of jail but best friends sitting in the cell next to you.
Riley is living four lives at once and she can't imagine her life any other way.
The week before she starts classes as a high school freshman, she and Auggie and their parents drive Uncle Josh to New York to see him settled in at school. He's excited and nervous and thrilled to be striking out on his own, and though he doesn't admit it he's clearly happy that his brother and his family are making the trip to help him out.
It takes Lucas a lot of begging but he hasn't been in any trouble at all, all summer and even before that, not since Zay got jumped, and eventually his parents give in and Zay's parents give in and let the two of them take a two-day trip to New York City. Farkle and Maya and Smackle, of course, just have to hop on a subway.
It's the first time they're all together in the flesh and for the space of a heartbeat it's supremely, painfully awkward.
And then Zay smiles flirtatiously at Riley and calls her darlin', and Smackle stammers out a dumbfounded hello to Lucas that makes Farkle doubletake, and Maya pretends to swoon in Josh's direction.
"Hi, Uncle Josh," she says, batting her eyelids at him.
"I'm not your uncle," he tells her, bemused.
"Even better!" And then, to Riley, "I would be your aunt!"
"You're not going to be my aunt," Riley says, but she can't stop smiling.
Maya loops an arm through Josh's and says, "I know you're new to the city and I would just like to volunteer my services as tour guide anytime you like," and Josh laughs uncertainly like he's not sure how seriously to take her, and then Riley's dad chases them all out ostensibly to give Josh some room without soon-to-be-high-schoolers hanging around but really because he knows how much Riley wants to spend time with them.
"Interesting," Smackle says once they're out of earshot and heading towards this coffeehouse Farkle knows. "If Maya and Joshua did become romantically involved, would that be considered incest?"
"Yeah, Maya," Riley says.
Maya makes a face and leans her head on Riley's shoulder. "He's not my uncle."
"But you're psychically linked to his niece. If, for example, you kissed him and Riley happened to experience your feelings -- "
"Okay!" Riley declares, too loudly. "Let's change the subject now!"
The coffeehouse is New York all over and Riley loves it instantly. There's a couple of unoccupied sofas in one corner that they claim, though it takes a while to sort out seating arrangements; Riley ends up on one sofa sandwiched between Maya and Zay, with Lucas, Farkle, and Smackle on the other.
It's weird. When Maya came to see her in Philly, it had seemed to make the lines between them clearer, aside from a few brief moments; Riley had generally been very sure of what feelings were Maya's and which were her own. But here and now, with all four of them together, she's having a hard time sorting out which feelings and impulses are hers and which are someone else's. She puts her head on Zay's shoulder and doesn't know if it's because she felt like it or if it's because that's what Lucas would do. She twines her fingers with Smackle's and wonders if it's because that's what Farkle wants to do, only realizes a few moments later that she used Lucas's hand to do it. She answers the phone when Maya's mom calls to check in and doesn't know if the words come from herself or Maya or one of the boys.
It doesn't matter. She means it, wherever it's coming from.
Zay and Smackle both handle it great, even when one of them starts a sentence and another one finishes it, or they don't even bother finishing it out loud all because they forget they have to. Zay flirts indiscriminately with all of them, making Riley laugh and Maya roll her eyes with a smile and Farkle blush. Smackle is fascinated by their connection, tries to keep notes until Lucas coaxes her phone out of her hand and Farkle throws an arm around the two of them and then she forgets to treat them scientifically.
Riley thinks: If the rest of my life is exactly like this I will never have anything to complain about, and Maya squeezes her hand and smiles at her, and Riley knows she's thinking the same thing.
Additional author's notes: [Cut for length]The guy in the leather jacket is the cluster's "father", but otherwise he's not anybody. I considered making him someone from Boy Meets World but it ultimately felt like pushing the limits of coincidence a little too far.
Riley will tell her parents about the cluster sooner rather than later but it didn't seem to fit into this fic. The Minkus parents, on the other hand, will probably never find out.