Fic: A Matter of Trust (Clark/Lex)
Title: A Matter of Trust
Author: Hils
Rating: PG
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Words: 3,497
Summary: Set between Arrival and Mortal. Clark discovers the downside of being human
Written for 10_hurt_comfort. The prompt was ‘sick’. Thanks to danceswithgary for the beta
Clark feels the flames licking higher, scorching his skin, destroying him slowly and painfully. His parents, Chloe, Lana and Lois are all there, watching him and laughing. He wants to die so the pain will be over, but he knows this will never end because he is in hell.
He wakes with a start, the horror of the dream still gripping him, but the heat on his body no less intense. He wipes a trembling hand over his clammy forehead and takes a shaky breath. Now that his eyes have adjusted, he can see the dim orange light of the dawn filtering though his window and with it comes the dull pain in his head that has been constant for the last few days. He coughs and that makes his head hurt even worse. For a moment, he wishes he would die. Unfortunately, now that he’s human, it’s a distinct possibility. He’s never been sick before and has no idea how his body is going to handle it. His mom doesn’t seem concerned, assuring him that it’s just a bad cold and that he’ll be back on his feet in no time. She can’t know for sure though. No one can.
He closes his eyes and tries to will away the pounding in his head, with little success. His parents will be awake soon and Lana will be over a few hours after that. They will then all fuss over him, doing all they can to make him feel better while at the same time smothering him to the point where he thinks he will go insane. Just thinking about it makes his head hurt ten times more than it was a few minutes ago.
He has to leave. The realisation comes quickly, as if it has always been in his head, only it never occurred to him to look for it. With it comes the knowledge of where he can go to get some peace. It’s his home away from home.
He throws back the covers, relishing the cool air on his skin for a few seconds before he starts to shiver. Getting up isn’t easy and takes several attempts. Once he’s on his feet, he decides forgo getting dressed as he just doesn’t have the energy, and instead pulls on a robe and his boots.
Staggering out of his room and down the stairs, he hopes he’s managing to be quiet. His head feels all fuzzy and he can’t hear properly, but he’s determined now. He climbs into his truck and starts the engine. As he drives down the track, he hopes he will still be welcome at his destination.
* * *
Standing outside the gates of the mansion, Clark feels like he could cry. The cold is biting into him now and he aches and is exhausted. A robotic voice through the intercom has told him in no uncertain terms to come back at a more reasonable hour when Lex will be awake. He can’t go back home, and he doesn’t have his powers to circumnavigate Lex’s security system like he used to. He is alone with nowhere to go.
He climbs back into the truck to wait and the next thing he knows, Lex’s hand is on his shoulder, gently shaking him awake.
“Clark? Are you ok?”
Clark shakes his head. “I’m sick,” he whimpers pathetically.
Those two small words hurt his throat so much he can actually feel the tears stinging his eyes. Lex is looking at him with concern and right now, all Clark wants to do is bury his face in Lex’s warm chest and let Lex make it all better. Lex always knows how to make it better.
Sure enough, Lex places a cool hand on Clark’s forehead, causing Clark to sigh happily and lean into the touch.
“Clark, do your parents know you’re here?”
He manages to shake his head, not wanting to talk any more than is necessary at this point. Lex nods and then firmly but gently helps Clark out of the truck, wrapping strong arms around him when he staggers.
“Come on, I’ll call your parents and let them know where you are. They’ll be worried.”
“I don’t want to go home,” Clark whispers. It still hurts his throat but less than normal talking does.
They’re walking towards the mansion now, and Lex is taking most of Clark’s weight. He doesn’t seem to mind especially, which gives Clark hope that coming here was the right thing to do.
“Did you have a fight with them?” Lex asks as he opens the door and guides them inside.
Clark shakes his head. “No. I just…needed to see you. I’ll go if you want me to though.”
Lex gives a resigned sigh, as though he were acting against his better instincts “No, it’s okay. You’re welcome to stay here until you’re feeling better. Come on, I’ll get you settled in bed and let your parents know where you are before they call the police.”
Lex’s voice makes Clark’s body tingle with more than just the fever. Just being near Lex soothes Clark and enables him to relax. He allows Lex to get him settled in bed and tuck him in, before listening as Lex phones the farm.
“Yes, Mrs Kent. Clark’s here. He’s not well though, so I think it would be wise to let him stay here until he’s feeling a little better. He’s sleeping at the moment, so it’s probably best not to disturb him. It’s fine, he’s no bother. OK, bye.”
Clark smiles as Lex hangs up. “Thank you.”
Lex smiles in return and Clark finds it warms him. It’s been too long since they’ve been able to smile at each other and Clark has been worried that his latest talk in the ruins of the farm had lost Lex forever. He regrets a lot of things, but one of them is point blank lying to Lex as he had done then. Maybe it wasn’t too late to fix things between them.
There is wariness in Lex’s eyes now that he’s gotten over the initial shock of finding Clark. Wariness and distrust show as he leans over and places his hand on Clark’s forehead again.
“I didn’t think you ever got sick.”
Lex is giving him another chance, a chance to be honest as he’d failed to be last time. Clark wants to be, wants to tell him everything but he’s just so tired. He blinks sleepily at Lex who realises now isn't the best time for questions, and pulls the blankets up under Clark’s chin.
“Get some sleep, Clark. We can talk when you’re feeling better if you want.”
Clark nods and drifts.
* * *
When he wakes, in a tangle of sweat-dampened sheets, he can hear muted voices outside the bedroom door. His head is a little clearer now and he doesn’t need enhanced hearing to make out the words.
“He’s my boyfriend, Lex! You can’t keep him from me!”
Lana’s voice is high and shrill and it makes Clark’s headache flare up again.
Lex is talking now and Clark can tell he’s angry, even though his voice is as soft and smooth as it always is.
“I can assure you Lana, it is not my place to stand in the way of your relationship with Clark and that is not my intention. The fact is he’s not well and what he needs right now is rest with minimal disruptions.”
“I just want to sit with him for a while. I’m not going to disturb him. Now, are you going to let me in there or should I call the police?”
It takes an incredibly brave person to go up against Lex Luthor. Or, an incredibly stupid one. Clark isn’t sure which Lana is right now, but he does know he isn’t ready to see her yet. He has every faith that Lana will not get through that door while Lex is standing guard over it and that gives him comfort.
“By all means call the police,” Lex sounds amused now. “You’ll find that Clark came here willingly. Maybe you ought to think about why he did that.”
“I’ll believe that when I hear it from Clark himself.”
Lana is persistent, Clark has to give her that, but the noise is getting too much for him now. His head is starting to pound and he gets the feeling that Lana isn’t going to leave no matter what Lex says.
It takes a surprising amount of effort for him to swing his legs over the edge of the bed and even more effort to stagger to his feet. By the time he reaches the door, he is sweating from exertion as well as the fever and he fumbles to open it before stepping out into the hall.
Lex has his back to the door and Clark almost stumbles into him. The heated discussion Lex has been having with Lana comes to an immediate stop, and Lex quickly moves to wrap an arm around Clark’s waist to stop him from falling. Lana is at Clark’s side a fraction of a second later, anxious hands flitting over his face and chest.
“Clark? Are you okay? We were all so worried when you took off in the middle of the night like that.”
Clark has the decency to look a little sorry. “I didn’t mean for people to worry. I just had to get out of the house. I was so hot.”
Lana places a small hand on his forehead and Clark notices it doesn’t feel half as good as it did when Lex was doing it.
“Your fever’s still pretty bad,” Lana observes. “Do you want me to take you home? I’m sure your mom would be happier if you were back on the farm.”
Clark is starting to get the feeling that Lana doesn’t care about what makes him happy so long as she has someone to dote on. He can feel annoyance burning in his gut, and he realises he needs to leave before he says something he can’t take back.
“Actually, I’m feeling pretty tired. I think I’ll stay here a bit longer if Lex doesn’t mind.”
“I don’t mind at all.”
Lex’s voice is so close to Clark’s ear that he can feel the breath tickling his skin. It makes him shiver.
“Can you help me back to bed, please?”
“Of course,” Lex replies and the last thing he sees as he is guided back into the bedroom is Lana’s outraged face. Then the door closes. He’ll talk to her later, when he’s feeling better, and try to explain. He’s not sure what he’s going to say, all he knows is he’s not ready to be away from Lex yet.
Instead of helping Clark back to bed, Lex eases him into a nearby chair and gestures to the sweaty, messed up sheets.
“I’ll have someone change those before you get back into bed. Are you okay there for a few minutes? Are you warm enough?”
Clark smiles as Lex wraps a blanket around his shoulders without even waiting for an answer before calling one of the maids to come and change the sheets. He’s missed this. Missed having his friend around and for once he doesn’t have to worry about keeping secrets from him.
Becoming human really is the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He catches hold of Lex’s hand and squeezes it gently.
“Thanks again, Lex. For everything.”
The smallest of smiles twitches at Lex’s lips but it may as well have been a beaming grin as far as Clark is concerned. He lets go of Lex’s hand as the maid comes in and changes the sheets with a speed that would have rivalled Clark’s if he still had his powers. She’s gone again, in what feels like seconds, and he’s alone with Lex again.
“Shall I help you into bed?” Lex’s voice is soft and low, and Clark shivers again. He’s suddenly struck by how wrong this whole situation is. He’d always told himself that his feelings for Lex were a result of his inability to date Lana and that he’d diverted them to Lex just so he had something to focus his raging hormones on. Now he has Lana, the girl he’s always wanted, and he sent her away so he could be alone with Lex. He wishes he could blame it on the fever but right now, everything seems perfectly clear. He loves Lex, and the fact that Lex is here taking care of him, even after everything that has happened, makes Clark think maybe Lex loves him too.
“Do you ever wish things were different between us?” he finds himself asking.
Lex takes a seat on the edge of the bed and stares at him, clearly trying to understand what Clark means.
“Well, that depends. If you’re asking whether I regret investigating you, then of course the answer is yes. Finding the truth was never worth losing your friendship.”
Clark shakes his head. “No, that’s not what I mean. We used to be so close. What happened to us?”
“Too many lies, Clark, on both sides. Of course, I miss what our friendship used to be, but you’ve made it clear that you don’t trust me and I don’t see that as much of an incentive to trust you in return. It’s not the ideal basis for a friendship. Wouldn’t you agree?”
Clark lowers his eyes, thankful that the fever has already caused his cheeks to flush. “It’s not just you, Lex. I’ve lied to everyone about so many things. I hated having to do it but it doesn’t really matter now.”
“It’s not too late, Clark,” Lex says gently. “If you would just trust me, I can show you that I’m worthy of that trust.”
Clark laughs, but it soon breaks off into a cough. Lex is at his side in an instant, rubbing a soothing hand over Clark’s back until the coughs die down.
“I’m okay,” Clark says when he’s able to breathe again. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, Lex. The big secret I’ve been trying to keep from everyone is gone.”
Lex frowns and takes a seat back on the bed. “Clark, you’re not making any sense.”
“I’m not human, Lex, or at least I wasn’t. I’m from a planet called Krypton that was destroyed not long after I was born. My parents sent me to Earth to keep me safe. I landed in the meteor shower, the one that lost you your hair and killed Lana’s parents. That’s just one of the many reasons I didn’t tell you. It’s my fault you’re bald.”
Lex seems to freeze where he’s sitting and Clark can almost see him trying to process all the information he’s just been presented with.
“Clark,” he finally says. “You can’t have been very old when this happened. I don’t think any sane person would hold you accountable for what happened to me and Lana’s parents.”
“There’s more,” Clark says sadly. “I had all kinds of special abilities. I was really strong, really fast, I could shoot fire out of my eyes, hear things from miles away. My parents told me to keep it a secret in case the wrong sort of person found out. Phelan did and he used it to blackmail me into doing what he wanted.”
There was another pause from Lex. “Is that what you see me as? The wrong sort of person?”
“No!” Clark shouts and has to stop to cough again. “It’s not like that. I didn’t tell any of my friends because I didn’t want to put them under that sort of pressure. It’s a huge secret to keep, Lex. Pete got tortured for it and I couldn’t stand the idea of something like that happening to someone else I care about.”
“I’d have done anything to protect you, Clark.”
He smiles. “I know. But I’m glad you didn’t have to.”
“You described your abilities in the past tense,” Lex observes.
“Yeah, something happened to me. My biological father did something to me as punishment for not training with him. He took away my powers. I’m just a regular guy now.”
Lex tenses. “Are there more like you here? Those people from the latest meteor shower are related to you?”
Clark sighs. “No, but they wanted me to join them and take over the world with them. They’re gone now. You don’t need to worry about it. Honestly, could you really see me taking over the world?”
He smiles, trying to ease Lex’s fears of a possible alien invasion. It works, and Lex chuckles. “What would be your first rule as world dictator? Compulsory eating of apple pie after dinner?”
Clark grins. “Nah, compulsory eating of pancakes for breakfast.”
The both laugh for a moment until Lex sobers. “So, your powers? Are they permanently gone?”
Clark shrugs. “I don’t know. I think so.”
“I think when you’re feeling better you should let me run some tests. It sounds as though you don’t really know what’s happened to you so we don’t know how your body is adjusting. It’s not a good sign that you’ve become sick so soon after becoming human. We don’t know how your immune system can handle human illnesses and-“
“We?” Clark interrupts. “You want to help me after all the lies I told you? All the secrets I kept?”
“I told you, Clark. Trust me and I’ll show you I’m worthy of being trusted.”
“I thought you’d be mad at me,” Clark mumbles.
“Mad? No. I'm sad that you didn’t feel able to tell me about this sooner, but at the same time I understand why you were so cautious, especially after what happened with Phelan.”
Clark sags in his seat, suddenly feeling beyond tired as the barrier of his secret is removed from between him and Lex. He has his friend back, finally.
“Come on,” Lex says, gently tugging Clark to his feet. “Get some rest and we can talk again later.”
Clark allows Lex to help him back to bed and tuck him in, a smile flickering across his lips as Lex brushes the damp hair out of his eyes.
“Lex?”
“Yeah?”
“Could you stay with me for a little while? Just until I fall asleep? I feel better having you nearby. Safe.”
Lex silently climbs onto the bed, laying on top of the covers beside Clark, but not touching him. He’s rigidly still and Clark worries for a moment that his request was too much.
“No one has ever told me they feel safe with me,” Lex finally says after agonising minutes of silence.
Clark rolls onto his side to look at Lex, whose eyes are fixed firmly on the ceiling. “I trust you, Lex. You kept Lana away from me, didn’t you? She usually gets her own way, you know.”
Lex chuckles again and turns his head to face Clark so that their faces are mere inches apart from each other “Why are you here, Clark? For the whole time I’ve known you all you wanted was Lana Lang, and today you just sent her away like it was nothing.”
“I’m here because I want to be here,” Clark replies softly. “With you.”
He closes the gap between them and kisses Lex softly, only vaguely aware that his breath probably isn’t the freshest in the world after days of being sick. Lex doesn’t seem to mind though, as he deepens the kiss and allows his tongue to slip into Clark’s mouth. Clark almost whimpers when Lex pulls back a few moments later.
“Today is just full of surprises, isn’t it?” Lex says with a lazy smile, which causes Clark to grin.
“I was kind of going to save that secret for another time,” Clark replies as he snuggles close to Lex and allows his eyes to drift shut.
“How about I share one with you, then,” Lex suggests, pressing a kiss to Clark’s forehead. “I’ve been in love with you since the first day we met, when you saved my life. Alien or human, Clark, I don’t care. I love you for who you are, not what you are.”
Clark’s eyes are open again now and he’s staring at Lex as though he’s some sort of fever-induced hallucination. “You really love me?”
Lex nods. “I do.”
Clark smiles and rests his head back on Lex’s chest. “That’s good, because I love you too.”
Lex runs his fingers through Clark’s hair and Clark feels like he could purr. “It works out well for both of us then.”
“Yeah.”
Clark drifts off to sleep with Lex still stroking his hair. He feels warm, safe and loved.
He feels better.
Author: Hils
Rating: PG
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Words: 3,497
Summary: Set between Arrival and Mortal. Clark discovers the downside of being human
Written for 10_hurt_comfort. The prompt was ‘sick’. Thanks to danceswithgary for the beta
Clark feels the flames licking higher, scorching his skin, destroying him slowly and painfully. His parents, Chloe, Lana and Lois are all there, watching him and laughing. He wants to die so the pain will be over, but he knows this will never end because he is in hell.
He wakes with a start, the horror of the dream still gripping him, but the heat on his body no less intense. He wipes a trembling hand over his clammy forehead and takes a shaky breath. Now that his eyes have adjusted, he can see the dim orange light of the dawn filtering though his window and with it comes the dull pain in his head that has been constant for the last few days. He coughs and that makes his head hurt even worse. For a moment, he wishes he would die. Unfortunately, now that he’s human, it’s a distinct possibility. He’s never been sick before and has no idea how his body is going to handle it. His mom doesn’t seem concerned, assuring him that it’s just a bad cold and that he’ll be back on his feet in no time. She can’t know for sure though. No one can.
He closes his eyes and tries to will away the pounding in his head, with little success. His parents will be awake soon and Lana will be over a few hours after that. They will then all fuss over him, doing all they can to make him feel better while at the same time smothering him to the point where he thinks he will go insane. Just thinking about it makes his head hurt ten times more than it was a few minutes ago.
He has to leave. The realisation comes quickly, as if it has always been in his head, only it never occurred to him to look for it. With it comes the knowledge of where he can go to get some peace. It’s his home away from home.
He throws back the covers, relishing the cool air on his skin for a few seconds before he starts to shiver. Getting up isn’t easy and takes several attempts. Once he’s on his feet, he decides forgo getting dressed as he just doesn’t have the energy, and instead pulls on a robe and his boots.
Staggering out of his room and down the stairs, he hopes he’s managing to be quiet. His head feels all fuzzy and he can’t hear properly, but he’s determined now. He climbs into his truck and starts the engine. As he drives down the track, he hopes he will still be welcome at his destination.
* * *
Standing outside the gates of the mansion, Clark feels like he could cry. The cold is biting into him now and he aches and is exhausted. A robotic voice through the intercom has told him in no uncertain terms to come back at a more reasonable hour when Lex will be awake. He can’t go back home, and he doesn’t have his powers to circumnavigate Lex’s security system like he used to. He is alone with nowhere to go.
He climbs back into the truck to wait and the next thing he knows, Lex’s hand is on his shoulder, gently shaking him awake.
“Clark? Are you ok?”
Clark shakes his head. “I’m sick,” he whimpers pathetically.
Those two small words hurt his throat so much he can actually feel the tears stinging his eyes. Lex is looking at him with concern and right now, all Clark wants to do is bury his face in Lex’s warm chest and let Lex make it all better. Lex always knows how to make it better.
Sure enough, Lex places a cool hand on Clark’s forehead, causing Clark to sigh happily and lean into the touch.
“Clark, do your parents know you’re here?”
He manages to shake his head, not wanting to talk any more than is necessary at this point. Lex nods and then firmly but gently helps Clark out of the truck, wrapping strong arms around him when he staggers.
“Come on, I’ll call your parents and let them know where you are. They’ll be worried.”
“I don’t want to go home,” Clark whispers. It still hurts his throat but less than normal talking does.
They’re walking towards the mansion now, and Lex is taking most of Clark’s weight. He doesn’t seem to mind especially, which gives Clark hope that coming here was the right thing to do.
“Did you have a fight with them?” Lex asks as he opens the door and guides them inside.
Clark shakes his head. “No. I just…needed to see you. I’ll go if you want me to though.”
Lex gives a resigned sigh, as though he were acting against his better instincts “No, it’s okay. You’re welcome to stay here until you’re feeling better. Come on, I’ll get you settled in bed and let your parents know where you are before they call the police.”
Lex’s voice makes Clark’s body tingle with more than just the fever. Just being near Lex soothes Clark and enables him to relax. He allows Lex to get him settled in bed and tuck him in, before listening as Lex phones the farm.
“Yes, Mrs Kent. Clark’s here. He’s not well though, so I think it would be wise to let him stay here until he’s feeling a little better. He’s sleeping at the moment, so it’s probably best not to disturb him. It’s fine, he’s no bother. OK, bye.”
Clark smiles as Lex hangs up. “Thank you.”
Lex smiles in return and Clark finds it warms him. It’s been too long since they’ve been able to smile at each other and Clark has been worried that his latest talk in the ruins of the farm had lost Lex forever. He regrets a lot of things, but one of them is point blank lying to Lex as he had done then. Maybe it wasn’t too late to fix things between them.
There is wariness in Lex’s eyes now that he’s gotten over the initial shock of finding Clark. Wariness and distrust show as he leans over and places his hand on Clark’s forehead again.
“I didn’t think you ever got sick.”
Lex is giving him another chance, a chance to be honest as he’d failed to be last time. Clark wants to be, wants to tell him everything but he’s just so tired. He blinks sleepily at Lex who realises now isn't the best time for questions, and pulls the blankets up under Clark’s chin.
“Get some sleep, Clark. We can talk when you’re feeling better if you want.”
Clark nods and drifts.
* * *
When he wakes, in a tangle of sweat-dampened sheets, he can hear muted voices outside the bedroom door. His head is a little clearer now and he doesn’t need enhanced hearing to make out the words.
“He’s my boyfriend, Lex! You can’t keep him from me!”
Lana’s voice is high and shrill and it makes Clark’s headache flare up again.
Lex is talking now and Clark can tell he’s angry, even though his voice is as soft and smooth as it always is.
“I can assure you Lana, it is not my place to stand in the way of your relationship with Clark and that is not my intention. The fact is he’s not well and what he needs right now is rest with minimal disruptions.”
“I just want to sit with him for a while. I’m not going to disturb him. Now, are you going to let me in there or should I call the police?”
It takes an incredibly brave person to go up against Lex Luthor. Or, an incredibly stupid one. Clark isn’t sure which Lana is right now, but he does know he isn’t ready to see her yet. He has every faith that Lana will not get through that door while Lex is standing guard over it and that gives him comfort.
“By all means call the police,” Lex sounds amused now. “You’ll find that Clark came here willingly. Maybe you ought to think about why he did that.”
“I’ll believe that when I hear it from Clark himself.”
Lana is persistent, Clark has to give her that, but the noise is getting too much for him now. His head is starting to pound and he gets the feeling that Lana isn’t going to leave no matter what Lex says.
It takes a surprising amount of effort for him to swing his legs over the edge of the bed and even more effort to stagger to his feet. By the time he reaches the door, he is sweating from exertion as well as the fever and he fumbles to open it before stepping out into the hall.
Lex has his back to the door and Clark almost stumbles into him. The heated discussion Lex has been having with Lana comes to an immediate stop, and Lex quickly moves to wrap an arm around Clark’s waist to stop him from falling. Lana is at Clark’s side a fraction of a second later, anxious hands flitting over his face and chest.
“Clark? Are you okay? We were all so worried when you took off in the middle of the night like that.”
Clark has the decency to look a little sorry. “I didn’t mean for people to worry. I just had to get out of the house. I was so hot.”
Lana places a small hand on his forehead and Clark notices it doesn’t feel half as good as it did when Lex was doing it.
“Your fever’s still pretty bad,” Lana observes. “Do you want me to take you home? I’m sure your mom would be happier if you were back on the farm.”
Clark is starting to get the feeling that Lana doesn’t care about what makes him happy so long as she has someone to dote on. He can feel annoyance burning in his gut, and he realises he needs to leave before he says something he can’t take back.
“Actually, I’m feeling pretty tired. I think I’ll stay here a bit longer if Lex doesn’t mind.”
“I don’t mind at all.”
Lex’s voice is so close to Clark’s ear that he can feel the breath tickling his skin. It makes him shiver.
“Can you help me back to bed, please?”
“Of course,” Lex replies and the last thing he sees as he is guided back into the bedroom is Lana’s outraged face. Then the door closes. He’ll talk to her later, when he’s feeling better, and try to explain. He’s not sure what he’s going to say, all he knows is he’s not ready to be away from Lex yet.
Instead of helping Clark back to bed, Lex eases him into a nearby chair and gestures to the sweaty, messed up sheets.
“I’ll have someone change those before you get back into bed. Are you okay there for a few minutes? Are you warm enough?”
Clark smiles as Lex wraps a blanket around his shoulders without even waiting for an answer before calling one of the maids to come and change the sheets. He’s missed this. Missed having his friend around and for once he doesn’t have to worry about keeping secrets from him.
Becoming human really is the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He catches hold of Lex’s hand and squeezes it gently.
“Thanks again, Lex. For everything.”
The smallest of smiles twitches at Lex’s lips but it may as well have been a beaming grin as far as Clark is concerned. He lets go of Lex’s hand as the maid comes in and changes the sheets with a speed that would have rivalled Clark’s if he still had his powers. She’s gone again, in what feels like seconds, and he’s alone with Lex again.
“Shall I help you into bed?” Lex’s voice is soft and low, and Clark shivers again. He’s suddenly struck by how wrong this whole situation is. He’d always told himself that his feelings for Lex were a result of his inability to date Lana and that he’d diverted them to Lex just so he had something to focus his raging hormones on. Now he has Lana, the girl he’s always wanted, and he sent her away so he could be alone with Lex. He wishes he could blame it on the fever but right now, everything seems perfectly clear. He loves Lex, and the fact that Lex is here taking care of him, even after everything that has happened, makes Clark think maybe Lex loves him too.
“Do you ever wish things were different between us?” he finds himself asking.
Lex takes a seat on the edge of the bed and stares at him, clearly trying to understand what Clark means.
“Well, that depends. If you’re asking whether I regret investigating you, then of course the answer is yes. Finding the truth was never worth losing your friendship.”
Clark shakes his head. “No, that’s not what I mean. We used to be so close. What happened to us?”
“Too many lies, Clark, on both sides. Of course, I miss what our friendship used to be, but you’ve made it clear that you don’t trust me and I don’t see that as much of an incentive to trust you in return. It’s not the ideal basis for a friendship. Wouldn’t you agree?”
Clark lowers his eyes, thankful that the fever has already caused his cheeks to flush. “It’s not just you, Lex. I’ve lied to everyone about so many things. I hated having to do it but it doesn’t really matter now.”
“It’s not too late, Clark,” Lex says gently. “If you would just trust me, I can show you that I’m worthy of that trust.”
Clark laughs, but it soon breaks off into a cough. Lex is at his side in an instant, rubbing a soothing hand over Clark’s back until the coughs die down.
“I’m okay,” Clark says when he’s able to breathe again. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, Lex. The big secret I’ve been trying to keep from everyone is gone.”
Lex frowns and takes a seat back on the bed. “Clark, you’re not making any sense.”
“I’m not human, Lex, or at least I wasn’t. I’m from a planet called Krypton that was destroyed not long after I was born. My parents sent me to Earth to keep me safe. I landed in the meteor shower, the one that lost you your hair and killed Lana’s parents. That’s just one of the many reasons I didn’t tell you. It’s my fault you’re bald.”
Lex seems to freeze where he’s sitting and Clark can almost see him trying to process all the information he’s just been presented with.
“Clark,” he finally says. “You can’t have been very old when this happened. I don’t think any sane person would hold you accountable for what happened to me and Lana’s parents.”
“There’s more,” Clark says sadly. “I had all kinds of special abilities. I was really strong, really fast, I could shoot fire out of my eyes, hear things from miles away. My parents told me to keep it a secret in case the wrong sort of person found out. Phelan did and he used it to blackmail me into doing what he wanted.”
There was another pause from Lex. “Is that what you see me as? The wrong sort of person?”
“No!” Clark shouts and has to stop to cough again. “It’s not like that. I didn’t tell any of my friends because I didn’t want to put them under that sort of pressure. It’s a huge secret to keep, Lex. Pete got tortured for it and I couldn’t stand the idea of something like that happening to someone else I care about.”
“I’d have done anything to protect you, Clark.”
He smiles. “I know. But I’m glad you didn’t have to.”
“You described your abilities in the past tense,” Lex observes.
“Yeah, something happened to me. My biological father did something to me as punishment for not training with him. He took away my powers. I’m just a regular guy now.”
Lex tenses. “Are there more like you here? Those people from the latest meteor shower are related to you?”
Clark sighs. “No, but they wanted me to join them and take over the world with them. They’re gone now. You don’t need to worry about it. Honestly, could you really see me taking over the world?”
He smiles, trying to ease Lex’s fears of a possible alien invasion. It works, and Lex chuckles. “What would be your first rule as world dictator? Compulsory eating of apple pie after dinner?”
Clark grins. “Nah, compulsory eating of pancakes for breakfast.”
The both laugh for a moment until Lex sobers. “So, your powers? Are they permanently gone?”
Clark shrugs. “I don’t know. I think so.”
“I think when you’re feeling better you should let me run some tests. It sounds as though you don’t really know what’s happened to you so we don’t know how your body is adjusting. It’s not a good sign that you’ve become sick so soon after becoming human. We don’t know how your immune system can handle human illnesses and-“
“We?” Clark interrupts. “You want to help me after all the lies I told you? All the secrets I kept?”
“I told you, Clark. Trust me and I’ll show you I’m worthy of being trusted.”
“I thought you’d be mad at me,” Clark mumbles.
“Mad? No. I'm sad that you didn’t feel able to tell me about this sooner, but at the same time I understand why you were so cautious, especially after what happened with Phelan.”
Clark sags in his seat, suddenly feeling beyond tired as the barrier of his secret is removed from between him and Lex. He has his friend back, finally.
“Come on,” Lex says, gently tugging Clark to his feet. “Get some rest and we can talk again later.”
Clark allows Lex to help him back to bed and tuck him in, a smile flickering across his lips as Lex brushes the damp hair out of his eyes.
“Lex?”
“Yeah?”
“Could you stay with me for a little while? Just until I fall asleep? I feel better having you nearby. Safe.”
Lex silently climbs onto the bed, laying on top of the covers beside Clark, but not touching him. He’s rigidly still and Clark worries for a moment that his request was too much.
“No one has ever told me they feel safe with me,” Lex finally says after agonising minutes of silence.
Clark rolls onto his side to look at Lex, whose eyes are fixed firmly on the ceiling. “I trust you, Lex. You kept Lana away from me, didn’t you? She usually gets her own way, you know.”
Lex chuckles again and turns his head to face Clark so that their faces are mere inches apart from each other “Why are you here, Clark? For the whole time I’ve known you all you wanted was Lana Lang, and today you just sent her away like it was nothing.”
“I’m here because I want to be here,” Clark replies softly. “With you.”
He closes the gap between them and kisses Lex softly, only vaguely aware that his breath probably isn’t the freshest in the world after days of being sick. Lex doesn’t seem to mind though, as he deepens the kiss and allows his tongue to slip into Clark’s mouth. Clark almost whimpers when Lex pulls back a few moments later.
“Today is just full of surprises, isn’t it?” Lex says with a lazy smile, which causes Clark to grin.
“I was kind of going to save that secret for another time,” Clark replies as he snuggles close to Lex and allows his eyes to drift shut.
“How about I share one with you, then,” Lex suggests, pressing a kiss to Clark’s forehead. “I’ve been in love with you since the first day we met, when you saved my life. Alien or human, Clark, I don’t care. I love you for who you are, not what you are.”
Clark’s eyes are open again now and he’s staring at Lex as though he’s some sort of fever-induced hallucination. “You really love me?”
Lex nods. “I do.”
Clark smiles and rests his head back on Lex’s chest. “That’s good, because I love you too.”
Lex runs his fingers through Clark’s hair and Clark feels like he could purr. “It works out well for both of us then.”
“Yeah.”
Clark drifts off to sleep with Lex still stroking his hair. He feels warm, safe and loved.
He feels better.