(no subject)
Nothing's going right.
Ryeowook burns his hands when he takes the cake out of the oven, and slices part of his finger off when chopping up the carrots.
"Fuck," he curses softly as he dumps the carrots into the pot and Jongwoon pops his head through the doorway.
"You going okay?"
"Peachy," Ryeowook mutters, hands clenched tight as he mixes some icing for the cake.
"Want help?" Jongwoon asks slowly, but Ryeowook shakes his head.
"I'll be done soon, just get everyone ready? Twenty minutes tops."
Jongwoon nods and disappears, and Ryeowook sighs, adding cocoa powder to the icing and testing the cake. Bit burnt, but he didn't have the time (nor the energy) to try again, and they'll appreciate it anyway.
The soup boils over and he rushes to turn the heat down before Kyuhyun pokes his head in.
"Are you alright?" he asks cautiously, just like Jongwoon did, and Ryeowook concentrates to keep a scowl from his face. His hands throb.
"Yeah, fine. Is everyone ready?"
"Almost..." Kyuhyun looks at him carefully, and Ryeowook's gaze softens.
"Sorry, just a bad day. Wanted to cook well for Youngwoon, you know, but."
"Not going well, I know the feeling."
Ryeowook nods, hip resting against the counter as he tests the soup and adds a pinch of salt.
"Need help?"
Ryeowook shakes his head. "Thanks."
"Okay, well everyone's almost ready. Just give a shout when you are."
Ryeowook nods, stirring the noodles around as Kyuhyun disappears again, and he sighs.
Well, he's at least putting good food on the table.
Dinner's quiet.
"It's good," Jongwoon says, smiling as he holds up a pair of chopsticks laden down with noodles.
Ryeowook smiles. “Thanks.”
Silence settles down again, comfortable.
Heechul clears his throat.
“So,” he starts, looking at them all. They’re all downcast.
“About tomorrow…”
Youngwoon starts and knocks over his glass, and Jungsu curses as it spills across his plate, onto his pants.
“Fuck, fuck, sorry, I’m so sorry Jungsu,” he blabbers as he grabs tissues and dabs.
“It’s okay, it’s fine, I got it.”
The rest of them stare at their plates in silence.
“Sorry,” Youngwoon whispers as he settles back in his chair, and none of them question what he means.
They know.
The next day is hard.
Even as Ryeowook wakes up, he has the sinking feeling in his chest and his hands bunch his bed sheets, tension in every part of his body.
He stumbles out of bed and makes breakfast, burning the beef and overcooking the rice, but none of them notice or seem to care.
He flings his chopsticks into the sink in disgust after they’re done, ready to wash up, but he bites his lips.
The one thing he’s good for here, and he can’t even do that for them before Youngwoon’s farewell.
“We’ll come around in the van to pick you up,” Jungsu says on the phone at ten, and he’s crying silently, face awash with tears.
Ryeowook makes a movement to hug him, but Kyuhyun moves his head just the tiniest bit, and Ryeowook lets his arms drop, biting his lip. Kyuhyun holds him instead as Ryeowook regulates his breathing, concentrating hard on keeping the tears in.
“Yeah, just get everything ready, don’t worry about it.”
Jongwoon approaches them carefully, face so worried, and Kyuhyun hands Ryeowook over as Jongwoon tightens his arms, the hug suffocatingly comforting.
“A few more hours,” Kyuhyun says softly, and that starts the tears, but it’s okay, because Ryeowook isn’t the only one.
Jungsu’s crying too, hands unsteady as he tries to put the phone back in its place, and Kyuhyun grabs it off him, putting it in place as he bites his lip, tears unshed but undeniably there, and Jongwoon has his hands tight against Ryeowook’s lower back, clenching the fabric there in a familiar way, trying to keep his emotions in but Ryeowook’s sobbing in the warmth of Jongwoon’s embrace, the sunlight telling him that everything will be okay when it won’t be.
Jongwoon cries. Ryeowook cries. Kyuhyun cries, but he’s careful.
Ryeowook feels drained as he settles back in the van, watching as Youngwoon disappears, and he closes his eyes. He feels a familiar presence on his left, Jongwoon’s head on his shoulder, and Ryeowook leans into it.
Kyuhyun climbs into the van next, settling on Ryeowook’s right as he takes one of Ryeowook’s hands and holds it tight.
“Sorry,” he whispers, voice hoarse as he tangles their hands together, and Ryeowook looks up to watch Kyuhyun’s face simply crumple, going from composed to a mess.
“It’s okay,” Ryeowook says as he moves, pushing Jongwoon’s head off and turning in his seat, hugging Kyuhyun awkwardly.
“It’ll be okay, it’s a good thing, this happening,” Jongwoon says as he tugs Kyuhyun’s hand from his face, trying to stifle the tears and the sobs.
“He’s gone,” Kyuhyun says, half choked up in a sob, and Ryeowook sighs, patting his head, Jongwoon stroking his hand.
“He’ll be back.”