[ONE SHOT] When?
Title: When?
Author: colourheart ♥
Length: Oneshot
Parings: None?
Rating: PG-13
Genre: (idunnoe xD) angst
A/N: this is one of my REALLY early works. like from July x) comment please :] also there is no paring just you and i. so youcan imagine someon? i guess? xD (sorry D:) this story makes me feel pathetic. =/ and i really dun wanna post it up but ah well.
When?
July 7 - Midnight.
When did it get so hard? I thought to myself. I thought I could do this. I have to. I made the decision and here I am. It hasn’t even been a month, and I’m already breaking down.
June 30 - Flashback.
I didn’t even see you that day. But I left. No goodbyes, nothing. All you got was the ring you gave me and letter. One tat didn’t even say half the things I wanted it to. It was for the best for both of us if we never saw each other again. Please don’t think I left you because I have you. If you believe me then trust me when I say this. I love you more then you can ever imagine. It was hard for me, but some how I know its harder for you. Three times, it’s been broken, and you still love me no matter. I’m such an ass, but you probably don’t think that. You asked me once, why did I break up with you once, and again…and again. Well to tell you the truth. I don’t know either. You’re my everything, yet I treat you like…I don’t even know what. When you read the letter, I hope you forget me. Find someone that will love you more, and someone that will heal the wound I’ve made.
When I think back about what I said on the letter, I laugh. I laugh at how stupid I’ve been. I pushed you away, but now look. It’s killing me that you’re gone. Please come back, I think so often, but why would you. We can’t go back to what we had. I broke it already. We can’t even be friends, since I get jealous at every girl you’re with. I envy them, because they can be at ease with you. But, it’s this hate that clouds me. I can only see hate, I don’t see the look in your eyes when you look at me. They’re longing, longing for me, for us.
When I live now, it’s all a lie. I wear a mask to cover myself. Beneath this mask, is the me that I’m afraid of. It’s the reality. I put on a smile when I see people. So they don’t know that I’ve actually been crying. That I thought of suicide. That I can’t live without you.
It’s clear now. What I am. I’m more then just an ass. I’m a jerk for breaking your heart. I’m a coward. A coward for not being able to face you. To face love, and accept what we had. Mainly, I’m just me. A someone who’s ruthless, but deep down, I just want this to end. I just want you back.
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wow. this story sickens me now XD
comments please?
Author: colourheart ♥
Length: Oneshot
Parings: None?
Rating: PG-13
Genre: (idunnoe xD) angst
A/N: this is one of my REALLY early works. like from July x) comment please :] also there is no paring just you and i. so youcan imagine someon? i guess? xD (sorry D:) this story makes me feel pathetic. =/ and i really dun wanna post it up but ah well.
When?
July 7 - Midnight.
When did it get so hard? I thought to myself. I thought I could do this. I have to. I made the decision and here I am. It hasn’t even been a month, and I’m already breaking down.
June 30 - Flashback.
I didn’t even see you that day. But I left. No goodbyes, nothing. All you got was the ring you gave me and letter. One tat didn’t even say half the things I wanted it to. It was for the best for both of us if we never saw each other again. Please don’t think I left you because I have you. If you believe me then trust me when I say this. I love you more then you can ever imagine. It was hard for me, but some how I know its harder for you. Three times, it’s been broken, and you still love me no matter. I’m such an ass, but you probably don’t think that. You asked me once, why did I break up with you once, and again…and again. Well to tell you the truth. I don’t know either. You’re my everything, yet I treat you like…I don’t even know what. When you read the letter, I hope you forget me. Find someone that will love you more, and someone that will heal the wound I’ve made.
When I think back about what I said on the letter, I laugh. I laugh at how stupid I’ve been. I pushed you away, but now look. It’s killing me that you’re gone. Please come back, I think so often, but why would you. We can’t go back to what we had. I broke it already. We can’t even be friends, since I get jealous at every girl you’re with. I envy them, because they can be at ease with you. But, it’s this hate that clouds me. I can only see hate, I don’t see the look in your eyes when you look at me. They’re longing, longing for me, for us.
When I live now, it’s all a lie. I wear a mask to cover myself. Beneath this mask, is the me that I’m afraid of. It’s the reality. I put on a smile when I see people. So they don’t know that I’ve actually been crying. That I thought of suicide. That I can’t live without you.
It’s clear now. What I am. I’m more then just an ass. I’m a jerk for breaking your heart. I’m a coward. A coward for not being able to face you. To face love, and accept what we had. Mainly, I’m just me. A someone who’s ruthless, but deep down, I just want this to end. I just want you back.
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wow. this story sickens me now XD
comments please?