snuggle bug
My parents had to go run errands this morning and they left my nephew with me. I was exhausted because I didn't sleep very well last night so I made him come and lay in bed with me. He is now sleeping cuddled up next to Nemo with his binky and I can honestly say that I have never felt more in love in my life. He is seriously the sunshine in my life. Ever since he was born, no matter how bad of a day I was having, this little monster has been able to make me smile. Being an Aunt is seriously the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me, and I can not wait until I have more nieces and nephews.
Things have been really good for me lately. School is definitely going in the right direction which I am super stoked about. The summer is sooo close that its making me so anxious. I can not wait to just go to the beach for a week. This summer is going to be a lot better than last summer. As much as I love working at Vitamin Water, it was so hard for me because I love being outside and sitting at a desk while its 80 something outside was just plain torture for me. The pepper is a much better situation for the summer. I'm gonna be playing on this co-ed softball team with my my friend Kati from work and her boyfriend. I am super excited about that too. Last summer was a huge learning experience for me. Ever since Mike and I broke up almost a year ago, I was really holding on to this like inside bitter guilt that was keeping me from really digesting what had transpired between us. In our relationship, it was like "an eye for an eye" type deal. I would do something wrong to him and he in return would hurt me back. There was no forgiveness or trust. Even though we did care about each other deeply, it was just something that we couldn't fix. A relationship can not work if there is no empathy. I will never regret any of my time spent with him. Even though we have had a rough past, I know that kid better than he knows himself, and if anyone deserves to find true happiness it is him.
I know that I have said this before but I believe so much that people come in and out of your lives when you really need them. Kristin, Jill and Corinne were there for me that summer when I was all alone. Kristin was here for me in the fall when I really needed a best friend. Things have changed and situations have put distance between us. For a while I was angry, bitter and felt betrayed, but the more I thought about it, the more I understood. Sometimes things happen in life, for whatever reason, that show you what you couldn't see before. I always thought that I needed someone to lean on, but for once I saw that I can stand on my own and I'll be alright. I am really trying my best to let go of the things that hurt me. I am sure that I have done things to hurt other people without really being aware of it. Everyone makes mistakes. Its only human. All of those people really helped me in a time of great need in my life and I am forever thankful for everything that ever did for me. I don't know if we will ever be close again but they will remain close to my heart.
I love when my trashy neighbor is outside on her cell phone talking about her scumbag boyfriend and yelling at her dog. She should hook up with my other creepy neighbor who loves to wear denim shorty shorts and trucker hats while dancing to Whitney Houston in his garage. I should sit outside more often because this is a lot better than any show on television. I hope we have a block party again this year, it would be a real shit show for sure. haha. I can't wait to be in love again. I mean I can because I am okay being single. I am enjoying it very much to tell you the truth. I guess just this weather makes me think of all the cute fun things to do when you have someone. Like going to the park on a walk, or going to the city and looking at museums, going for runs, getting ice cream, going to the beach, going for long drives, bbqing at shanners, laying in bed and just cuddling watching a mooovie, going on the swings at night and looking at the stars, going to the movies, pretttty much anything. ahaha. Its all stuff I can do on my own, but its just not as much fun. I think in my past relationships I had a habit of making things more difficult than they had to be. I don't enjoy things being complicated. A lot of the problems that I had in my life, were mostly in my head. Now that I've been sorting through them and working them out. Life seems to be a lot more enjoyable. That way you think really does reflect the way you live. I'm excited for what the future holds for me. I feel a lot of good things coming my way. I know that everything is going to be alright. I think after this semester is done I am going to get another tattoo on my other foot. I was actually telling my dad about my idea and he actually thought it was pretty good. I'm just taking things one day at a time. Im loving every second of it.
Things have been really good for me lately. School is definitely going in the right direction which I am super stoked about. The summer is sooo close that its making me so anxious. I can not wait to just go to the beach for a week. This summer is going to be a lot better than last summer. As much as I love working at Vitamin Water, it was so hard for me because I love being outside and sitting at a desk while its 80 something outside was just plain torture for me. The pepper is a much better situation for the summer. I'm gonna be playing on this co-ed softball team with my my friend Kati from work and her boyfriend. I am super excited about that too. Last summer was a huge learning experience for me. Ever since Mike and I broke up almost a year ago, I was really holding on to this like inside bitter guilt that was keeping me from really digesting what had transpired between us. In our relationship, it was like "an eye for an eye" type deal. I would do something wrong to him and he in return would hurt me back. There was no forgiveness or trust. Even though we did care about each other deeply, it was just something that we couldn't fix. A relationship can not work if there is no empathy. I will never regret any of my time spent with him. Even though we have had a rough past, I know that kid better than he knows himself, and if anyone deserves to find true happiness it is him.
I know that I have said this before but I believe so much that people come in and out of your lives when you really need them. Kristin, Jill and Corinne were there for me that summer when I was all alone. Kristin was here for me in the fall when I really needed a best friend. Things have changed and situations have put distance between us. For a while I was angry, bitter and felt betrayed, but the more I thought about it, the more I understood. Sometimes things happen in life, for whatever reason, that show you what you couldn't see before. I always thought that I needed someone to lean on, but for once I saw that I can stand on my own and I'll be alright. I am really trying my best to let go of the things that hurt me. I am sure that I have done things to hurt other people without really being aware of it. Everyone makes mistakes. Its only human. All of those people really helped me in a time of great need in my life and I am forever thankful for everything that ever did for me. I don't know if we will ever be close again but they will remain close to my heart.
I love when my trashy neighbor is outside on her cell phone talking about her scumbag boyfriend and yelling at her dog. She should hook up with my other creepy neighbor who loves to wear denim shorty shorts and trucker hats while dancing to Whitney Houston in his garage. I should sit outside more often because this is a lot better than any show on television. I hope we have a block party again this year, it would be a real shit show for sure. haha. I can't wait to be in love again. I mean I can because I am okay being single. I am enjoying it very much to tell you the truth. I guess just this weather makes me think of all the cute fun things to do when you have someone. Like going to the park on a walk, or going to the city and looking at museums, going for runs, getting ice cream, going to the beach, going for long drives, bbqing at shanners, laying in bed and just cuddling watching a mooovie, going on the swings at night and looking at the stars, going to the movies, pretttty much anything. ahaha. Its all stuff I can do on my own, but its just not as much fun. I think in my past relationships I had a habit of making things more difficult than they had to be. I don't enjoy things being complicated. A lot of the problems that I had in my life, were mostly in my head. Now that I've been sorting through them and working them out. Life seems to be a lot more enjoyable. That way you think really does reflect the way you live. I'm excited for what the future holds for me. I feel a lot of good things coming my way. I know that everything is going to be alright. I think after this semester is done I am going to get another tattoo on my other foot. I was actually telling my dad about my idea and he actually thought it was pretty good. I'm just taking things one day at a time. Im loving every second of it.