came to a conclusion that this is PURE illusion
Damn after reading giz journal...I just feel like typing away..hahah okay that and the whole fact my group isn't really meeting right now and I dont feel like doing a paper..and I've already went on myspace and aim and email and contemplated seeing if friendster still existed I came to my last point on the whole internet... my el jay
It feels so long since things collapsed and rebuilding is still going on..I've learned that there are some things beyond reason you'll never comprehend or people for that matter...you try to stay in denial but after some moments of clarity you realize that you're better off..or maybe that what ur in denial about..that u are better off..cause it doesnt feel like it sometimes..
every little aspect around me continues to just amaze me..how cruel I could be..and i dont mean to others but to myself..we toture ourselves..over everything..over the why's and how come's when in the end no one fuckin knows or if there is even a grain of truth in what we discover.
sometimes i feel really good..and other days not so fine and dandy but like the little quote of I'm having a bad day but I'm still living..
and no quite contrary to what u think all this ramble isn't about him
its always been about me and my hang ups and realizing I could give a shit to what do's and don'ts we should follow afterwards cause honestly no one gets it and one day past the stupid shitty side of college..ill look back and realize no one ever knows what do to do after
and u know whats funny after all my drama starting since who knows high school till now..i look back and its funny how as jaded and cycnical i wish i became or the front i show sometimes...I never give up hope on having better days ahead..cause after one single night in senior year and having that gift to just wake up the next day..I realized nothing in life if worth that feeling or thinking..
i like pouring out my thoughts into a lower traffic rated blog hah..
It feels so long since things collapsed and rebuilding is still going on..I've learned that there are some things beyond reason you'll never comprehend or people for that matter...you try to stay in denial but after some moments of clarity you realize that you're better off..or maybe that what ur in denial about..that u are better off..cause it doesnt feel like it sometimes..
every little aspect around me continues to just amaze me..how cruel I could be..and i dont mean to others but to myself..we toture ourselves..over everything..over the why's and how come's when in the end no one fuckin knows or if there is even a grain of truth in what we discover.
sometimes i feel really good..and other days not so fine and dandy but like the little quote of I'm having a bad day but I'm still living..
and no quite contrary to what u think all this ramble isn't about him
its always been about me and my hang ups and realizing I could give a shit to what do's and don'ts we should follow afterwards cause honestly no one gets it and one day past the stupid shitty side of college..ill look back and realize no one ever knows what do to do after
and u know whats funny after all my drama starting since who knows high school till now..i look back and its funny how as jaded and cycnical i wish i became or the front i show sometimes...I never give up hope on having better days ahead..cause after one single night in senior year and having that gift to just wake up the next day..I realized nothing in life if worth that feeling or thinking..
i like pouring out my thoughts into a lower traffic rated blog hah..