Being Single in US/Korean-American Society: A Rant
A summary of Korean-American culture through my eyes:
Everyone will graduate high school and get into a university. If you're in community college, you're going to transfer to a university.
In college, you're just studying rather than getting to know people around you. Though if you do get to know people, it's always the people who are just like you: Asians whose lives barely differ form yours.
You will have at least one girlfriend/boyfriend before you graduate college. Korean is wonderful, but neighboring countries are good too.
After you graduate and get a job, you get married somewhere down the line (preferably before or around 30).
Anyone who doesn't follow this timeline is a "deviant" or "abnormal".
I've been called "abnormal" and had someone ask if I had any personality disorders through my mother because I'm 25 and I haven't had a boyfriend or dated.
Everyone is expect to follow this formulaic "successful life" even though people say it's not exactly heaven on Earth. People will complain about it or tell you all the bad things that's going on in whatever stage of their life, but then they expect you to be going through the exact same life they have.
No one says it, it's just expected. And if you don't follow it, we'll tell you what to do.
OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER.
(In case you forget :D)
Screw the "successful life". Screw American society and TV too.
If God wants me to be single for the rest of my life, my parents just have to suck it up and bear with the fact that I will be "unwanted", "abnormal" and "undesirable" until the end of time.
And 40-year-old virgin? Why is that a joke? Because you NEED to have sex to be a "grown-up"? I NEED to have sex to know something about life?There's more people having kids that shouldn't than people who aren't that should, anyways.
I'm tired of having TV and people rub into my face that something's wrong with me. I already know what's wrong with me and that the lack of a significant other or a sex life is not what's "wrong" with me.
What's wrong with me is that I should be dead but I'm alive.
That's why my life isn't subject to what people say or think about what's "good" and "normal". It's not mine. If it way, I'd be believing that I'm incomplete or flawed without a significant other in my life.
Since the one who saved my life says I'm good the way I am, with or without a boyfriend, that's good enough for me.
Everyone will graduate high school and get into a university. If you're in community college, you're going to transfer to a university.
In college, you're just studying rather than getting to know people around you. Though if you do get to know people, it's always the people who are just like you: Asians whose lives barely differ form yours.
You will have at least one girlfriend/boyfriend before you graduate college. Korean is wonderful, but neighboring countries are good too.
After you graduate and get a job, you get married somewhere down the line (preferably before or around 30).
Anyone who doesn't follow this timeline is a "deviant" or "abnormal".
I've been called "abnormal" and had someone ask if I had any personality disorders through my mother because I'm 25 and I haven't had a boyfriend or dated.
Everyone is expect to follow this formulaic "successful life" even though people say it's not exactly heaven on Earth. People will complain about it or tell you all the bad things that's going on in whatever stage of their life, but then they expect you to be going through the exact same life they have.
No one says it, it's just expected. And if you don't follow it, we'll tell you what to do.
OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER. AND OVER.
(In case you forget :D)
Screw the "successful life". Screw American society and TV too.
If God wants me to be single for the rest of my life, my parents just have to suck it up and bear with the fact that I will be "unwanted", "abnormal" and "undesirable" until the end of time.
And 40-year-old virgin? Why is that a joke? Because you NEED to have sex to be a "grown-up"? I NEED to have sex to know something about life?There's more people having kids that shouldn't than people who aren't that should, anyways.
I'm tired of having TV and people rub into my face that something's wrong with me. I already know what's wrong with me and that the lack of a significant other or a sex life is not what's "wrong" with me.
What's wrong with me is that I should be dead but I'm alive.
That's why my life isn't subject to what people say or think about what's "good" and "normal". It's not mine. If it way, I'd be believing that I'm incomplete or flawed without a significant other in my life.
Since the one who saved my life says I'm good the way I am, with or without a boyfriend, that's good enough for me.