put the water's roughening surface to sleep
jongdae/jongin & junmyeon/sehun & chanyeol/jongdae; pg13; fluff-like (YES, ALL OF THEM); basically just a hell lot of AUs; total ~2300
unbeta'd and rushed pls don't kill me all of these are trash, they're all for tlist thank you for putting up with my shit yo
princes (are not supposed to be prince-like) for chansoos
jongdae/jongin; g; fluff; prince!au; ~860
jongdae’s stuck here, in the ball, where people are chattering and drinking and eating and having fun, while junmyeon is out in the library to discuss business with the other rulers. this is exactly why jongdae does not like being a prince.
he’s dragged by baekhyun (“come on, you look so sullen!” his bodyguard had whined) to a group of princes, and so now, he’s in front of one, attempting not to be rude.
it’s only common courtesy that jongdae greets the prince of some northwestern-kingdom-whatever with a bow and a smile. if he can do whatever he wants, then well, he would have banned everyone from entering the castle and attempting to socialize, but he’s no king. junmyeon, his brother, is.
“pleasure to meet you,” jongdae offers the prince a tight-lipped smile - not too forced but not too carefree, to show his unwillingness to talk more after this. “prince, uh?”
instead of being offended (jongdae has lost count of people that reacted like that - prince kibum of the east is a prime example), the prince laughs, brilliantly. “i’m not that well-known, so i’m not really surprised that you don’t know me,” he offers his hand, and jongdae hurries to shake it. “prince kim jongin of the northwestern kingdom. pleasure to meet you, too, prince jongdae.”
jongdae has now changed his mind because of that brilliant smile.
he really does want to talk to this prince of the northwest, because, as he quotes from junmyeon, he ‘needs more friends’ and has to try ‘to not sulk’ - and, according to baekhyun, needs to ‘don’t be your genitals’ - and the prince seems really, really nice.
nice, not like prince kibum of the eastern kingdom (okay, well, prince kibum has so much more good qualities than his vanity to offer, but first impressions are the ones that stick the most).
“uh,” jongdae waves his hands awkwardly (he’s still flatly refusing to be called a prince since junmyeon was a king), “please just call me jongdae. i, um, am anxious when people start calling me with ‘prince’. i’m not prince-like, like, at all.”
jongin stares at jongdae.
jongdae averts his gaze to the marble floor and starts to twiddle his thumbs - a habit that he had picked since he was a kid from his caretaker. the thrum of the piano and violin serves as background music, a white noise, but jongdae is painfully aware of the awkwardness slipping inside their bones.
“there’s nothing in this world that can be categorized as ‘prince-like’,” jongin suddenly says, tone serious, and jongdae looks up in bewilderment. “a prince may act noble and act all-around-righteous, but there are so many princes that had gone the wrong way, and they’re still princes. you may think you don’t act like a prince should do, but i think you’re doing wonderfully.”
jongdae tries to say a thank you, but it comes out as kind of a choked sob.
“i, uh, thanks.”
jongin smiles - a wide and comforting one, as if saying, i don’t know what you’ve experienced, but i just want to say that i’m here to support you - and jongdae thinks that it’s almost blinding. “don’t worry - “
a scandalized gasp erupts from the crowd and everything stops - the music, the dance, and jongin’s smile. in the middle, there’s the queen of the northwest - kim minseon, highly intoxicated, lewdly kissing the king of the south, park chanyeol - and jongin, finally realizing what the cause is, sighs, shaking his head.
jongdae chuckles lamely at the scene.
“she’s tainting her reputation even more,” jongin mutters beside him, and starts to take a step before he apparently remembers something and turns to jongdae - smiling sheepishly, so radiant, so hopeful, and so not jongdae-like.
he freezes, because he has a feeling that he is one of the few people that has received jongin’s beautiful and perfect and ethereal smile.
“um, we’ll still be here for some weeks because of that business thing king junmyeon has been talking about, and - “ jongin bites his lips, scratching his cheek. “and i’m hoping that we’ll be able to talk more? like, someday?”
the scandalous and hurried whispers are back, but jongdae heeds to attention to it, because the prince of the northwestern kingdom and everything beautiful in life wants to see him.
not anyone, but him, kim jongdae, the forgotten spare of the northern kingdom - for the first time, not junmyeon.
“um, sure,” he squeaks (jongdae squeaked, his mind realizes in horror, this should never happen again), and jongin sends him a relieved grin and a nod before he bows and slips into the crowd, so lithely and leisurely like the castle is his own home.
the noise level of the room is now teetering on dangerously deaf-inducing.
he sees jongin pulling queen minseon out of the dance floor, the queen attempting to strangle her brother just because jongin wanted to save her - because jongin interrupted her uncomfortably hot and public make-out session with king chanyeol - apparently not realizing that the prince is her own sibling.
jongdae chokes on his drink, and afterwards, he has to calm down a panicked baekhyun that thought someone had laced jongdae’s drink with poison.
kittens and alcohol for lucelucetaliena
junmyeon/sehun; pg13; fluff; pet shop!au; ~880
when sehun enters the pet shop, he almost stares accusingly at the man in the corner - apparently not noticing the little ding of the door when he entered, still stocking up catfood and other pet snacks.
he can’t see the man’s face, but he knows that body posture well enough - too many shy kisses and nervous laughter and awkward i love yous are imprinted inside his mind, exchanged between them over a small shot of alcohol that poured like magic from the man’s grip.
“who are you?” he questions, loud enough to be heard from the entrance (almost a bit rudely, to be honest), but his voice is still soft and coaxing - a very distinctive trait from sehun, indeed - and when he says that, the man almost drops the can of catfood he has been holding.
“sehun!” the man awkwardly fumbles with the can, grinning sheepishly. “wow! it’s been - a very long time since we met, yeah? haha! wow! i - um, never thought you would see me here - i didn’t know you had a pet, yeah! that’s why!”
sehun can now clearly see his features, slick black hair with soft lips and bright eyes, and he narrows his eyes.
“junmyeon,” he says slowly. “i thought you worked as a bartender.”
the other waves his hands (flails, if you ask for sehun’s opinion) in an abstract motion, a blush creeping on his cheek. “being a bartender is - um! night-time job! being in a pet shop, though, is my day job! both are beautiful, and i like alcohol and animals too! both are cute! i love cute things!”
he blinks.
“you like,” sehun repeats - every word that junmyeon’s spilling is already ruining the image of a bespectacled young man with sharp intellectuality and zero tolerance for nonsense things, god - tone disbelieving. “you, um, like cute things. and you’re both a bartender and a pet shop caretaker.”
junmyeon laughs, but it sounds more like a whale dying. “haha! yeah! i’m - uh, i’m sorry that i never mentioned this to you, since uh - i never expected you to own a cat or dog or anything - i just thought it was completely pointless! i’m - i know we were supposed to share everything, but it’s a little bit embarrassing - i’m, sorry, haha, i’m rambling.”
the silence grows thick between them, with junmyeon fiddling with his work attire (it’s casual, sehun notes absentmindedly, there’s no horrendous aprons or stuff or slogans and logos imprinted on the shirt - it looks like a common casual attire), and sehun still taking all the information in, cans of pet food still unstacked in the box beside junmyeon’s seemingly tiny frame.
it’s junmyeon who talks first - it’s junmyeon who breaks the ice first, as always.
“do you even have a pet?”
sehun bursts into laughter. “no,” he shakes his head, an amused smile etched on his face. “no, no - i was wanting to adopt one.”
“you plan to adopt!” junmyeon almost trips over the canned food and sehun has to steady him. junmyeon, still laughing, tries to compose himself. “oh, this is so great - you’re not buying one! well, not that we have pets, anyway because liyin-noona absolutely loathes the prospect of selling cute kittens and puppies,” he blabbers on. “and you’re now buying things! for your pet! what do you want? a dog, a puppy, a cat, a kitten? wow - sehun and his pet!”
“who’s liyin-noona?” sehun abruptly asks.
junmyeon, though, doesn’t seem to get intimidated by sehun’s sharp tone or heavy stare. sehun does, infact, get jealous easily, and he himself has admitted it guiltily, too, a few times. “oh, don’t mind her,” junmyeon waves his hand, smiling, just to taunt sehun, who’s furrowing his eyebrows - he does that when he’s frustrated.
“junmyeon-hyung.”
the older chuckles. “liyin-noona’s a childhood friend of mine - “ cue sehun’s scandalized gasp, “ - and the owner of this pet shop, don’t worry. she has jongdae as her boyfriend - remember him? see, i’m reserved only for you, okay? don’t get that jealous too easily, oh sehun.”
“i still don’t believe you are both a bartender and a pet shop caretaker.”
junmyeon huffs haughtily. “i’m the evidence of that, excuse,” he whispers indignantly, eyebrows raised in mock seriousness, and sehun, once again - junmyeon has never failed to do that, and sehun’s very grateful of that - laughs.
“let’s just buy the stuffs for our kitten and head to your place tonight.”
junmyeon hums in agreement, calling for someone named hongbin, apparently to take over his duties, because junmyeon has a very important customer to help - and when the said man appears out of the lockers, bangs falling over his right eye, he grins.
“that must be sehun,” he states to no one in particular, and sehun, not knowing who he is, looks at his boyfriend in question. “junmyeon-hyung spilled the beans about you when liyin-noona had her birthday party here and i spiked his drink.”
junmyeon’s glare must be murderous, because hongbin slinks away, almost immediately, to complete junmyeon’s job.
---
“wait, i just realized - did you say our kitten?”
“yes, junmyeon-hyung, our kitten.”
i would suck (the soul out of) you for teddyescher
chanyeol/jongdae; pg13; idk how to genre; ~420 + ~140
it happens because of a dare. chanyeol and jongdae, that's what happened.
"come on," kyungsoo shoves him to the direction of jongdae, who's currently munching at a very gross-looking hamburger that chanyeol would spit and stomp at if he ever encounters anything like it. "you said you wanted to practice your english, yes? i need to record this for that dare - i still don't understand why luhan didn't want to be here. come on, the word dementor isn't that hard."
the word dementor rolls over kyungsoo's tongue so flawlessly that chanyeol is suddenly afraid.
he backs off weakly. "i can't do this," chanyeol wheezes. "if you can do it, i can't. it's a proven fact. and what if he doesn't like harry potter? what if he's not in the fandom? what if he doesn't understand the joke? kyungsoo, i'm not like you, i'm not naturally gifted with the talent to make english sound hot - "
"no one is not in the harry potter fandom," kyungsoo silences him, but he narrows his eyes at jongdae's form. "well, if he isn't in the fandom and likes twilight, i'm going to strangle his puny little body."
chanyeol mumbles a you're not helping, but he obediently shuffles to jongdae's direction when he hears the little click of the camcorder that's filming every part of his awkwardness and his discreet little crush to jongdae.
he takes a deep breath - quite closely to jongdae, he must say - but he still does not notice him.
"are you a dementor because you take my breath away," he says that quickly in one breath, slurring one word after another, and jongdae looks up, bewildered, grease still sticking out on his lips and chanyeol wants to first wash it off and then kiss him and his dry and chapped lips, moisture it with his own or something.
ew.
jongdae blinks, slowly, attempting to understand, when he suddenly laughs - a clear and beautiful sound in chanyeol's ears, shaking his head in amusement. "that was the cheesiest thing i've ever heard in my whole life of being a potterhead," he mutters, and chanyeol breathes a sigh of relief.
the other, though, is not done yet. jongdae wipes off the grease off his skin and turns to chanyeol, a wicked smile playing coyly on his lips, and he whispers to him, quietly but lewdly.
"and yes, maybe i am a dementor, because i want to suck you."
chanyeol lets out an incoherent string of curse words while luhan gives kyungsoo a thumbs up in the background.
[bonus first draft featuring harsh yifan and sambal belacan]
---
it starts off simple, really. chanyeol was just wanting to practice his english and he's bored out of his mind, and the only person available to entertain him was jongdae. he was reading tweets of a random twitter user, and his eyes scanned the word pick up lines. that's when he knew he found out the right one, and he prepares himself for the oncoming tweets.
"are you... sambal belacan," he squints his eyes, voice loud enough to make jongdae yank his earpiece out and make yifan peek out from his room, "because... you are hot."
yifan's tsk is too harsh for chanyeol's poor, poor heart. "what was that pronunciation," he comments rudely in korean, and chanyeol glares at him. "and what does sambal belacan even mean?"
"found what it meant," jongdae says leisurely as he scrolls through his ipad. "some kind of spicy thing."
unbeta'd and rushed pls don't kill me all of these are trash, they're all for tlist thank you for putting up with my shit yo
princes (are not supposed to be prince-like) for chansoos
jongdae/jongin; g; fluff; prince!au; ~860
jongdae’s stuck here, in the ball, where people are chattering and drinking and eating and having fun, while junmyeon is out in the library to discuss business with the other rulers. this is exactly why jongdae does not like being a prince.
he’s dragged by baekhyun (“come on, you look so sullen!” his bodyguard had whined) to a group of princes, and so now, he’s in front of one, attempting not to be rude.
it’s only common courtesy that jongdae greets the prince of some northwestern-kingdom-whatever with a bow and a smile. if he can do whatever he wants, then well, he would have banned everyone from entering the castle and attempting to socialize, but he’s no king. junmyeon, his brother, is.
“pleasure to meet you,” jongdae offers the prince a tight-lipped smile - not too forced but not too carefree, to show his unwillingness to talk more after this. “prince, uh?”
instead of being offended (jongdae has lost count of people that reacted like that - prince kibum of the east is a prime example), the prince laughs, brilliantly. “i’m not that well-known, so i’m not really surprised that you don’t know me,” he offers his hand, and jongdae hurries to shake it. “prince kim jongin of the northwestern kingdom. pleasure to meet you, too, prince jongdae.”
jongdae has now changed his mind because of that brilliant smile.
he really does want to talk to this prince of the northwest, because, as he quotes from junmyeon, he ‘needs more friends’ and has to try ‘to not sulk’ - and, according to baekhyun, needs to ‘don’t be your genitals’ - and the prince seems really, really nice.
nice, not like prince kibum of the eastern kingdom (okay, well, prince kibum has so much more good qualities than his vanity to offer, but first impressions are the ones that stick the most).
“uh,” jongdae waves his hands awkwardly (he’s still flatly refusing to be called a prince since junmyeon was a king), “please just call me jongdae. i, um, am anxious when people start calling me with ‘prince’. i’m not prince-like, like, at all.”
jongin stares at jongdae.
jongdae averts his gaze to the marble floor and starts to twiddle his thumbs - a habit that he had picked since he was a kid from his caretaker. the thrum of the piano and violin serves as background music, a white noise, but jongdae is painfully aware of the awkwardness slipping inside their bones.
“there’s nothing in this world that can be categorized as ‘prince-like’,” jongin suddenly says, tone serious, and jongdae looks up in bewilderment. “a prince may act noble and act all-around-righteous, but there are so many princes that had gone the wrong way, and they’re still princes. you may think you don’t act like a prince should do, but i think you’re doing wonderfully.”
jongdae tries to say a thank you, but it comes out as kind of a choked sob.
“i, uh, thanks.”
jongin smiles - a wide and comforting one, as if saying, i don’t know what you’ve experienced, but i just want to say that i’m here to support you - and jongdae thinks that it’s almost blinding. “don’t worry - “
a scandalized gasp erupts from the crowd and everything stops - the music, the dance, and jongin’s smile. in the middle, there’s the queen of the northwest - kim minseon, highly intoxicated, lewdly kissing the king of the south, park chanyeol - and jongin, finally realizing what the cause is, sighs, shaking his head.
jongdae chuckles lamely at the scene.
“she’s tainting her reputation even more,” jongin mutters beside him, and starts to take a step before he apparently remembers something and turns to jongdae - smiling sheepishly, so radiant, so hopeful, and so not jongdae-like.
he freezes, because he has a feeling that he is one of the few people that has received jongin’s beautiful and perfect and ethereal smile.
“um, we’ll still be here for some weeks because of that business thing king junmyeon has been talking about, and - “ jongin bites his lips, scratching his cheek. “and i’m hoping that we’ll be able to talk more? like, someday?”
the scandalous and hurried whispers are back, but jongdae heeds to attention to it, because the prince of the northwestern kingdom and everything beautiful in life wants to see him.
not anyone, but him, kim jongdae, the forgotten spare of the northern kingdom - for the first time, not junmyeon.
“um, sure,” he squeaks (jongdae squeaked, his mind realizes in horror, this should never happen again), and jongin sends him a relieved grin and a nod before he bows and slips into the crowd, so lithely and leisurely like the castle is his own home.
the noise level of the room is now teetering on dangerously deaf-inducing.
he sees jongin pulling queen minseon out of the dance floor, the queen attempting to strangle her brother just because jongin wanted to save her - because jongin interrupted her uncomfortably hot and public make-out session with king chanyeol - apparently not realizing that the prince is her own sibling.
jongdae chokes on his drink, and afterwards, he has to calm down a panicked baekhyun that thought someone had laced jongdae’s drink with poison.
kittens and alcohol for lucelucetaliena
junmyeon/sehun; pg13; fluff; pet shop!au; ~880
when sehun enters the pet shop, he almost stares accusingly at the man in the corner - apparently not noticing the little ding of the door when he entered, still stocking up catfood and other pet snacks.
he can’t see the man’s face, but he knows that body posture well enough - too many shy kisses and nervous laughter and awkward i love yous are imprinted inside his mind, exchanged between them over a small shot of alcohol that poured like magic from the man’s grip.
“who are you?” he questions, loud enough to be heard from the entrance (almost a bit rudely, to be honest), but his voice is still soft and coaxing - a very distinctive trait from sehun, indeed - and when he says that, the man almost drops the can of catfood he has been holding.
“sehun!” the man awkwardly fumbles with the can, grinning sheepishly. “wow! it’s been - a very long time since we met, yeah? haha! wow! i - um, never thought you would see me here - i didn’t know you had a pet, yeah! that’s why!”
sehun can now clearly see his features, slick black hair with soft lips and bright eyes, and he narrows his eyes.
“junmyeon,” he says slowly. “i thought you worked as a bartender.”
the other waves his hands (flails, if you ask for sehun’s opinion) in an abstract motion, a blush creeping on his cheek. “being a bartender is - um! night-time job! being in a pet shop, though, is my day job! both are beautiful, and i like alcohol and animals too! both are cute! i love cute things!”
he blinks.
“you like,” sehun repeats - every word that junmyeon’s spilling is already ruining the image of a bespectacled young man with sharp intellectuality and zero tolerance for nonsense things, god - tone disbelieving. “you, um, like cute things. and you’re both a bartender and a pet shop caretaker.”
junmyeon laughs, but it sounds more like a whale dying. “haha! yeah! i’m - uh, i’m sorry that i never mentioned this to you, since uh - i never expected you to own a cat or dog or anything - i just thought it was completely pointless! i’m - i know we were supposed to share everything, but it’s a little bit embarrassing - i’m, sorry, haha, i’m rambling.”
the silence grows thick between them, with junmyeon fiddling with his work attire (it’s casual, sehun notes absentmindedly, there’s no horrendous aprons or stuff or slogans and logos imprinted on the shirt - it looks like a common casual attire), and sehun still taking all the information in, cans of pet food still unstacked in the box beside junmyeon’s seemingly tiny frame.
it’s junmyeon who talks first - it’s junmyeon who breaks the ice first, as always.
“do you even have a pet?”
sehun bursts into laughter. “no,” he shakes his head, an amused smile etched on his face. “no, no - i was wanting to adopt one.”
“you plan to adopt!” junmyeon almost trips over the canned food and sehun has to steady him. junmyeon, still laughing, tries to compose himself. “oh, this is so great - you’re not buying one! well, not that we have pets, anyway because liyin-noona absolutely loathes the prospect of selling cute kittens and puppies,” he blabbers on. “and you’re now buying things! for your pet! what do you want? a dog, a puppy, a cat, a kitten? wow - sehun and his pet!”
“who’s liyin-noona?” sehun abruptly asks.
junmyeon, though, doesn’t seem to get intimidated by sehun’s sharp tone or heavy stare. sehun does, infact, get jealous easily, and he himself has admitted it guiltily, too, a few times. “oh, don’t mind her,” junmyeon waves his hand, smiling, just to taunt sehun, who’s furrowing his eyebrows - he does that when he’s frustrated.
“junmyeon-hyung.”
the older chuckles. “liyin-noona’s a childhood friend of mine - “ cue sehun’s scandalized gasp, “ - and the owner of this pet shop, don’t worry. she has jongdae as her boyfriend - remember him? see, i’m reserved only for you, okay? don’t get that jealous too easily, oh sehun.”
“i still don’t believe you are both a bartender and a pet shop caretaker.”
junmyeon huffs haughtily. “i’m the evidence of that, excuse,” he whispers indignantly, eyebrows raised in mock seriousness, and sehun, once again - junmyeon has never failed to do that, and sehun’s very grateful of that - laughs.
“let’s just buy the stuffs for our kitten and head to your place tonight.”
junmyeon hums in agreement, calling for someone named hongbin, apparently to take over his duties, because junmyeon has a very important customer to help - and when the said man appears out of the lockers, bangs falling over his right eye, he grins.
“that must be sehun,” he states to no one in particular, and sehun, not knowing who he is, looks at his boyfriend in question. “junmyeon-hyung spilled the beans about you when liyin-noona had her birthday party here and i spiked his drink.”
junmyeon’s glare must be murderous, because hongbin slinks away, almost immediately, to complete junmyeon’s job.
---
“wait, i just realized - did you say our kitten?”
“yes, junmyeon-hyung, our kitten.”
i would suck (the soul out of) you for teddyescher
chanyeol/jongdae; pg13; idk how to genre; ~420 + ~140
it happens because of a dare. chanyeol and jongdae, that's what happened.
"come on," kyungsoo shoves him to the direction of jongdae, who's currently munching at a very gross-looking hamburger that chanyeol would spit and stomp at if he ever encounters anything like it. "you said you wanted to practice your english, yes? i need to record this for that dare - i still don't understand why luhan didn't want to be here. come on, the word dementor isn't that hard."
the word dementor rolls over kyungsoo's tongue so flawlessly that chanyeol is suddenly afraid.
he backs off weakly. "i can't do this," chanyeol wheezes. "if you can do it, i can't. it's a proven fact. and what if he doesn't like harry potter? what if he's not in the fandom? what if he doesn't understand the joke? kyungsoo, i'm not like you, i'm not naturally gifted with the talent to make english sound hot - "
"no one is not in the harry potter fandom," kyungsoo silences him, but he narrows his eyes at jongdae's form. "well, if he isn't in the fandom and likes twilight, i'm going to strangle his puny little body."
chanyeol mumbles a you're not helping, but he obediently shuffles to jongdae's direction when he hears the little click of the camcorder that's filming every part of his awkwardness and his discreet little crush to jongdae.
he takes a deep breath - quite closely to jongdae, he must say - but he still does not notice him.
"are you a dementor because you take my breath away," he says that quickly in one breath, slurring one word after another, and jongdae looks up, bewildered, grease still sticking out on his lips and chanyeol wants to first wash it off and then kiss him and his dry and chapped lips, moisture it with his own or something.
ew.
jongdae blinks, slowly, attempting to understand, when he suddenly laughs - a clear and beautiful sound in chanyeol's ears, shaking his head in amusement. "that was the cheesiest thing i've ever heard in my whole life of being a potterhead," he mutters, and chanyeol breathes a sigh of relief.
the other, though, is not done yet. jongdae wipes off the grease off his skin and turns to chanyeol, a wicked smile playing coyly on his lips, and he whispers to him, quietly but lewdly.
"and yes, maybe i am a dementor, because i want to suck you."
chanyeol lets out an incoherent string of curse words while luhan gives kyungsoo a thumbs up in the background.
[bonus first draft featuring harsh yifan and sambal belacan]
---
it starts off simple, really. chanyeol was just wanting to practice his english and he's bored out of his mind, and the only person available to entertain him was jongdae. he was reading tweets of a random twitter user, and his eyes scanned the word pick up lines. that's when he knew he found out the right one, and he prepares himself for the oncoming tweets.
"are you... sambal belacan," he squints his eyes, voice loud enough to make jongdae yank his earpiece out and make yifan peek out from his room, "because... you are hot."
yifan's tsk is too harsh for chanyeol's poor, poor heart. "what was that pronunciation," he comments rudely in korean, and chanyeol glares at him. "and what does sambal belacan even mean?"
"found what it meant," jongdae says leisurely as he scrolls through his ipad. "some kind of spicy thing."