let's call it love.
spring, 2007 :
-talulah gosh
-the aislers set (dude, healrumpy, thx for inadvertently reminding me that the vernal equinox is a mere three weeks away!)
-sleater-kinney
-the spinanes? can i deal with this? wtf, i liked them first!
-papas fritas
-and?
thinking, so.
in the winter, i tend to dress like your stereotypical hobo and i listen to country music.
in the spring, i favor really adorable dresses and black anklets (socks)/shoes and i listen to tweepop (and sleater-kinney. oh god, ever since the first time i heard "get up").
in the summer, i wear shorts to work and i listen to a lot of riot folk.
in the fall, in the fall...electro, i guess, is semi-consistent. but i don't like fall. i don't like fall "fashion", i don't get excited about wearing sweaters, and i generally get really depressed and really apprehensive about the coming winter and i nearly have a panic attack come september first (um, i think i have actually talked about this in this journal in past years or something!) and the whole "concept" is just Not For Me. so i don't think about it a lot and i can't come up with any really concrete examples.
but, like, i'm pretty sure my point is that i am a creature of habit. i don't usually think about it, i guess, (except sometimes i do) but i behave pretty seasonally.
sleater-kinney is so good. i keep remembering/forgetting this. i saw their almost-last show. it made me cry. i am a wimp. they are tough. i don't know if the woods is my favorite, because it didn't used to be my favorite and i didn't even like it that much the first time i heard it but then i totally Got Over Myself and listened to it on repeat continuously on my way to/from ballet. and now it makes me air drum more than anything. i am having a the woods kinda-dance party alone(?) in my livingroom. well, my cat is here. he is sitting on my lap now. i think he went to sleep and i can't get up because he is cute. but earlier, he was rocking out with me to "wilderness" because he is great and has great taste in music and ladies. shit, sleater-kinney. we should be girlfriends and go to prom.
alison got back the boks her friend dan borrowed from her eeeeeeeeeeeons ago, so now i am borrowing them. i am reading the monkey wars right now, and it is basically destroying my love for science, which is really sad because i totally love science(s). but dude, i am Not About animal testing. see also, how i am Not About douchebag scientists who talk a big game about how animal testing is Really Important For Saving Lives And Stuff but actually don't give two shits about Saving Lives, they are just interested in how the brain works so they do all kinds of crazy monkey brain surgery that necessarily involves killing monkeys. okay. i get it. i am not completely stupid and yeah, there are obviously human medical applications here, but don't try to play this off as altruistic when you clearly said that the only reason you (personally) are doing this is because you want to know how brains work. i get it. you are curious. that's why you're a scientist. don't worry, guy, it makes sense. but then, when you kill a bunch of animals and a.r. kids call you on it, don't think you can get all disingenuous and "confused" about why anyone would be against this Totally Important research that Obviously Will Save (human) Lives!!! you fucking disgust me and i have no respect for you and i wish someone would take a scalpel to your fucking hippocampus. choke on a bag of dicks, stuart zola-morgan. two conclusions i have come to about me versus animal research (non-human primates in particular): first, i know it sounds like a real dumb kid thing to say, but the thing that bothers me the most about primate research is that no one bothers to ask them if they want to be experimented on. honestly, i'm not an idiot. so much time is spent on determining whether apes and monkeys can truly learn/understand/use human language. and it's pretty well-documented that they can (i am talking about american sign language here, just in case anyone thinks i'm a complete lunatic). so what are the implications of this? well, for one thing, it quite neatly removes one excuse scientists (and eighteenth century imperialists!) have found it really convenient to lean on: the language barrier. i mean, obviously there's no way to ask animals if they want to be experimented on at the discretion of people who don't care about their quality of life. except there sort of is, maybe, and i am not envisioning Really Deep Conversations about the nature of Teh Soul or, like, whatever. but if nothing else, it might make for an interesting experiment: see how well non-human primates can comprehend their own mortality. see how far the self-preservation instinct stretches. i'm sure that someone, somewhere, must have asked their research animals these questions, mustn't they have? but if this is the case, no one's talking about it. at least not that i have heard. the second thing i have realized is actually more personal and was sparked off by the offhand comment that Of Course Non-Human Animals Don't Have Rights, You Plebe! Rights Are The Product Of Civilization And Non-Humans Don't Have Civilization! Go Plant Some Hemp And Leave Science To Not-You!!! um. you may or may not recall it, but as i'm sure all of you know, i plan to go to library school someday. before that, i need a bachelor's degree in something, and that "something" is going to be sociology if i don't go insane and kill someone first because dammit social sciences simultaneously fascinate/enrage me. these things are related because what i really want to study is information. that is what i truly orgasm over. what does this have to do with animal rights? probably very little, except in my own solipsistic mind. gerhard lenski's measure of what makes a civilization "advanced" is the amount of information members of it can pass (and how they do it). i mean, i'm a little shaky on my lenski, but that's why we go to school, yeah? my point is this: i am kind of Really Down with this interpretation of "advanced" versus "primitive". and primates? clearly synthesize information really fucking well, even on human terms. they recognize relationships between letters and numbers, they retain knowledge over periods of time, THEY TEACH EACH OTHER THESE SKILLS. honest to god, chimps who have been taught sign language have taught it to their children. this is why i want to study sociology. at least part of the reason. this is why i want to study information. but, i mean, also because i am interested in human culture. or whatever. it's okay, i know no one read this. skimmed it at best. it's late. we're all tired.
i have been sporadically trying to learn french again. i have been looking up all the words i use on a regular basis. somehow, i feel this language is out of my reach, but i really would like to learn it. i don't know. i have been randomly saying things in hebrew lately. turns out i remember much more than i thought i did. sometimes, alison says something in french, which i understand, and then i'll answer her in german or hebrew. when i can't think of anything, i answer in english. whenever this happens, i get very excited and shout I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS! but i also don't kid myself, and i despair of ever carrying on a conversation in any language other than english. my memory retention is so shady that i'm lucky i have full grasp of even one language, and sometimes even this is debatable.
-talulah gosh
-the aislers set (dude, healrumpy, thx for inadvertently reminding me that the vernal equinox is a mere three weeks away!)
-sleater-kinney
-the spinanes? can i deal with this? wtf, i liked them first!
-papas fritas
-and?
thinking, so.
in the winter, i tend to dress like your stereotypical hobo and i listen to country music.
in the spring, i favor really adorable dresses and black anklets (socks)/shoes and i listen to tweepop (and sleater-kinney. oh god, ever since the first time i heard "get up").
in the summer, i wear shorts to work and i listen to a lot of riot folk.
in the fall, in the fall...electro, i guess, is semi-consistent. but i don't like fall. i don't like fall "fashion", i don't get excited about wearing sweaters, and i generally get really depressed and really apprehensive about the coming winter and i nearly have a panic attack come september first (um, i think i have actually talked about this in this journal in past years or something!) and the whole "concept" is just Not For Me. so i don't think about it a lot and i can't come up with any really concrete examples.
but, like, i'm pretty sure my point is that i am a creature of habit. i don't usually think about it, i guess, (except sometimes i do) but i behave pretty seasonally.
sleater-kinney is so good. i keep remembering/forgetting this. i saw their almost-last show. it made me cry. i am a wimp. they are tough. i don't know if the woods is my favorite, because it didn't used to be my favorite and i didn't even like it that much the first time i heard it but then i totally Got Over Myself and listened to it on repeat continuously on my way to/from ballet. and now it makes me air drum more than anything. i am having a the woods kinda-dance party alone(?) in my livingroom. well, my cat is here. he is sitting on my lap now. i think he went to sleep and i can't get up because he is cute. but earlier, he was rocking out with me to "wilderness" because he is great and has great taste in music and ladies. shit, sleater-kinney. we should be girlfriends and go to prom.
alison got back the boks her friend dan borrowed from her eeeeeeeeeeeons ago, so now i am borrowing them. i am reading the monkey wars right now, and it is basically destroying my love for science, which is really sad because i totally love science(s). but dude, i am Not About animal testing. see also, how i am Not About douchebag scientists who talk a big game about how animal testing is Really Important For Saving Lives And Stuff but actually don't give two shits about Saving Lives, they are just interested in how the brain works so they do all kinds of crazy monkey brain surgery that necessarily involves killing monkeys. okay. i get it. i am not completely stupid and yeah, there are obviously human medical applications here, but don't try to play this off as altruistic when you clearly said that the only reason you (personally) are doing this is because you want to know how brains work. i get it. you are curious. that's why you're a scientist. don't worry, guy, it makes sense. but then, when you kill a bunch of animals and a.r. kids call you on it, don't think you can get all disingenuous and "confused" about why anyone would be against this Totally Important research that Obviously Will Save (human) Lives!!! you fucking disgust me and i have no respect for you and i wish someone would take a scalpel to your fucking hippocampus. choke on a bag of dicks, stuart zola-morgan. two conclusions i have come to about me versus animal research (non-human primates in particular): first, i know it sounds like a real dumb kid thing to say, but the thing that bothers me the most about primate research is that no one bothers to ask them if they want to be experimented on. honestly, i'm not an idiot. so much time is spent on determining whether apes and monkeys can truly learn/understand/use human language. and it's pretty well-documented that they can (i am talking about american sign language here, just in case anyone thinks i'm a complete lunatic). so what are the implications of this? well, for one thing, it quite neatly removes one excuse scientists (and eighteenth century imperialists!) have found it really convenient to lean on: the language barrier. i mean, obviously there's no way to ask animals if they want to be experimented on at the discretion of people who don't care about their quality of life. except there sort of is, maybe, and i am not envisioning Really Deep Conversations about the nature of Teh Soul or, like, whatever. but if nothing else, it might make for an interesting experiment: see how well non-human primates can comprehend their own mortality. see how far the self-preservation instinct stretches. i'm sure that someone, somewhere, must have asked their research animals these questions, mustn't they have? but if this is the case, no one's talking about it. at least not that i have heard. the second thing i have realized is actually more personal and was sparked off by the offhand comment that Of Course Non-Human Animals Don't Have Rights, You Plebe! Rights Are The Product Of Civilization And Non-Humans Don't Have Civilization! Go Plant Some Hemp And Leave Science To Not-You!!! um. you may or may not recall it, but as i'm sure all of you know, i plan to go to library school someday. before that, i need a bachelor's degree in something, and that "something" is going to be sociology if i don't go insane and kill someone first because dammit social sciences simultaneously fascinate/enrage me. these things are related because what i really want to study is information. that is what i truly orgasm over. what does this have to do with animal rights? probably very little, except in my own solipsistic mind. gerhard lenski's measure of what makes a civilization "advanced" is the amount of information members of it can pass (and how they do it). i mean, i'm a little shaky on my lenski, but that's why we go to school, yeah? my point is this: i am kind of Really Down with this interpretation of "advanced" versus "primitive". and primates? clearly synthesize information really fucking well, even on human terms. they recognize relationships between letters and numbers, they retain knowledge over periods of time, THEY TEACH EACH OTHER THESE SKILLS. honest to god, chimps who have been taught sign language have taught it to their children. this is why i want to study sociology. at least part of the reason. this is why i want to study information. but, i mean, also because i am interested in human culture. or whatever. it's okay, i know no one read this. skimmed it at best. it's late. we're all tired.
i have been sporadically trying to learn french again. i have been looking up all the words i use on a regular basis. somehow, i feel this language is out of my reach, but i really would like to learn it. i don't know. i have been randomly saying things in hebrew lately. turns out i remember much more than i thought i did. sometimes, alison says something in french, which i understand, and then i'll answer her in german or hebrew. when i can't think of anything, i answer in english. whenever this happens, i get very excited and shout I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS! but i also don't kid myself, and i despair of ever carrying on a conversation in any language other than english. my memory retention is so shady that i'm lucky i have full grasp of even one language, and sometimes even this is debatable.