Is there no magic in hypocrisy left?
Can our children no longer be glad to know that their misdeeds are being judged by a man well-versed in vice? First, he can't be jolly about all his ho, ho, hos: http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,22761386-2,00.html;
Now, he's gotta be a role model and slim down, as if managing to slide down all the chimneys of the world in a scarlet and snow white suit without a smudge of ash on his ass wasn't enough: http://www.bostonherald.com/news/regional/general/view.bg?articleid=1047979.
What's next, no clay pipe 'cause of lung cancer? Should he get LASIK and lose the bifocals? Shave off the soup-catcher beard, for hygiene and professionalism? And I'll bet those boots are leather -- he should switch to greener gear and stop murdering cows for his footwear. Do the reindeer have health care? Are the elves unionized? And what about the OSHA standards at the North Pole?
Now, he's gotta be a role model and slim down, as if managing to slide down all the chimneys of the world in a scarlet and snow white suit without a smudge of ash on his ass wasn't enough: http://www.bostonherald.com/news/regional/general/view.bg?articleid=1047979.
What's next, no clay pipe 'cause of lung cancer? Should he get LASIK and lose the bifocals? Shave off the soup-catcher beard, for hygiene and professionalism? And I'll bet those boots are leather -- he should switch to greener gear and stop murdering cows for his footwear. Do the reindeer have health care? Are the elves unionized? And what about the OSHA standards at the North Pole?