01; missing you runs too deep, kangin/leeteuk !au (1/?)
Missing You Runs Too Deep, (Kangin/Leeteuk)
PG-13
mostly mafia!au, but you get a side whore!au and school!au as well.
Summary: It has been five years since Leeteuk vanished from Kangin’s life. This is a story about their past, the present, and their future. This is a story about love and heartbreak, about facing up to reality, about how ‘moving on’ and ‘letting go’, although often preceding each other, are two entirely different things.
a/n: i know this pairing receives a lot of wank, but bear with me and give it a try, please. i tend to get distracted often so god knows if i'll complete this. it isn’t meant to be a long story, but we’ll see where that goes. i might branch out to different pairings as the story progresses, but that depends on whether i manage to successfully weave them in. every chapter will have something of the present, and maybe an excerpt from the past. they will be labelled accordingly, so don’t worry. i apologise if that makes it confusing, but as mentioned in the summary, this story isn’t just about the present; the past plays an integral role as well, because really… it’s the past that defines who we are.
* anonymous commenting is enabled, IP-logging is off, so go ahead and spit out all the dirt you can find about this story, it’ll help me tremendously.
.intro
(Did you know? That despite it being five fucking years since I’d last seen you, I still think about you so often that it’s as though you’ve never left. On the fifteen of every February, I still buy a box of chocolates with champagne to go with and leave it under the bench of that old park. On the first of every July, I still make a sloppy, hand-written card for you and post it to your old mailing address. On the seventeen of every December, I buy another anklet for the both of us. Are you surprised? Do you perhaps pity me?
Well darling, on every one of those nights, I go to the same bar we’d met in, pick a girl there to bring back and proceed to fuck her senseless, so you can take back that sympathy.)
Their love story has never been one of head-over-heels romance. It starts out cliché enough: Park Jungsoo being every teacher’s favourite student and heading the school council, and Kim Youngwoon being the school’s bad boy, the one who brings down the school’s reputation. Jungsoo is the one you would see studying in the library until dusk, the one with immaculate attire and extremely neat handwriting. Youngwoon is the one you would see ‘looking for a pen’ through the keyhole of the girl’s bathroom. Jungsoo is the one who has never broken a school rule in his life and Youngwoon is the one who… to put simply, breaks every school rule in a week.
The important thing though, is that this Jungsoo, the one with straight A’s, the one who has his life planned out for him, the one who envisions himself with a loving wife by his side (163cm, eyes that would curve into half-moons when she laughs) in the future, falls in love with Kim Youngwoon.
And this Youngwoon, the one with straight F’s, the one who never really gives a damn about his future, the one who thinks commitment is a terrifying issue, he loves Jungsoo back with all his heart.
.chapter one (winter, 2009)
[Jungsoo.]
It is late by the time he gets back to his room. Loosening his tie, he shrugs off his jacket, draping it over a desk chair before looking around the tastefully furnished hotel room without much appreciation. Just as he is about to cross over to draw the curtains close, he gets interrupted by the ringing of the door.
“Room service,” a voice rings out.
Letting a small smile grace his usually impassive face, he strides towards the doorway corridor of his executive room. “Finally,” he thinks. Now, he can at least get a decent night’s rest. It is his fault for not bringing his sleeping pills, but that does not matter anymore. He started depending on them five years ago, and he has absolutely no idea how he still managed to forget them.
“Must be my failing memory,” he muses and smiles inwardly - Heechul will have a field day when he gets back from his business trip. In fact, he can already hear the taunting voice mocking him with its usual gleeful mirth.
To his surprise, when he pushes open the door, there is no one. Immediately, his hackles rise. Years of experience has taught him to be wary and be on the lookout for something amiss. In fact, being constantly alert has been ingrained into him. Looking around carefully, he narrows his eyes and tries to detect any heavy breathing or telltale signs that will give away a person on the prey. However, even with every one of his senses on the alert, he is unable to detect anything. Shaking his head, he gives the hallway one final, sweeping look before turning around to head back to his room. It could just be kids, he reasons. Kids were annoying creatu-
He does not manage to complete his train of thought before an elbow gives a sharp, precise jab on one of his nerve points.
Leeteuk’s world goes black.
.excerpt (winter, 2003)
[Jungsoo.]
“I’m bored, humour me.”
Glancing at Youngwoon, who has unceremoniously pushed Jungsoo’s bag away from the chair next to Jungsoo and dumped himself on it, he frowns.
“Open your books and actually study for once, maybe then you’ll find out that the world is actually much more interesting than what you perceive it to be, and life wouldn’t be so boring anymore,” he snaps as he bends to the side to retrieve his bag. He had been in the middle of a particularly hard algebraic equation and was close to solving it when Youngwoon disrupted his train of thoughts. Naturally, he is none too pleased about that.
Over to his right, Youngwoon’s eyes widen. “Whoa, what’s wrong with you? I swear, studying too hard all the time has gotten to your brain. Do you even know the meaning of sitting back and relaxing? Life’s too short to spend the whole time buried into books, darling,” Youngwoon says, grabbing Jungsoo’s hands and staring at him seriously.
Jerking his hand out of Kangin’s grip, Jungsoo ignores him and crushes the paper in front of him, opting instead to start over on a new sheet of paper.
Withdrawing his hands from the table, Youngwoon leans back and sighs. “Okay, fine. Ignore me if you want to. Just answer some questions of mine, and then you’re free to continue being a nerd, okay?”
Chewing on his pen thoughtfully, Jungsoo tries his best to ignore Youngwoon, focusing his attention on the algebraic question instead. However, Youngwoon’s next words blows Jungsoo off.
“Are you a prostitute?”
Snapping his head up to stare at Youngwoon, he gasps, “What? No! Of course not!”
Grinning easily, Youngwoon props his elbows on the table, before leaning his head on his palms and staring at Jungsoo innocently. “Oh well. You’re hot, so I figured you could be one.” Smirking, Youngwoon continues, “Would you ever consider a one-night stand then?”
“No!”
“Pity. It’s fine though, I figured you were a romantic anyway,” Laughing, he ignores Jungsoo’s outraged expression and brings his nails to his lips to chew thoughtfully on them, pondering frown on his face.
“Go ahead and do your work, the rest of the questions aren’t that bad now.”
Jungsoo stares at Youngwoon suspiciously, before saying in a wary tone, “You’d better mean that.” Upon receiving a somewhat innocent nod from Youngwoon, he wrinkles his nose at Youngwoon, before trying to focus on his work once again. He really has to get these questions done.
“Do you know how to cycle?”
“...Nope.”
“That’s alright. I could have you as a passenger hugging me, I guess. Ever stolen a bike?”
And so the endless tirade of questions, ranging from normal ones to outrageous ones, goes on, with Jungsoo saying a bored ‘no’ to every question. Eventually, it gets to the point where he replies a ‘no’ automatically.
“Would you consider going out with me?” Youngwoon grins and bats his eyelashes to the auburn, messy strands of Jungsoo’s hair - because he is too absorbed in his work to bother looking at Youngwoon while he speaks.
“No,” is the instantaneous reply.
“Are you straight?”
“No - What?”
Laughing and punching the air gleefully, Youngwoon leans in and whispers huskily, “So… Why won’t you consider going out with me?”
Brushing his lips against Jungsoo’s cheeks, Youngwoon straightens and stretches, grin still on his face as he saunters off without waiting for a reply, missing the slight flush on Jungsoo’s cheeks.
(winter 2009)
[Jungsoo.]
When Leeteuk awakens, it is to the feeling of an almost trembling finger caressing the planes of his angular face and the tingling, unnerving sensation of being watched. As he slowly regains his senses, Leeteuk remembers how he’d opened the hotel door and got knocked cold. Fuck, he curses inwardly. How had he gotten so careless?
Although he barely stirs or moves a muscle upon awaking, his perpetrator seems to know he is awake. The finger withdraws, but the sensation of being watched remains. For a minute, there is no sound except for the steady breathing of Leeteuk and the stranger, but that changes soon enough.
“Open your eyes,” A rough baritone orders from several feet away. It seems like the man has moved.
Leeteuk’s eyelids flutter once and snap open. Pupils dilating to focus better in the dim light, his gaze sweeps across the same hotel room he checked in to, before focusing on the back of a sturdy figure by the window.
Shifting his splayed body to a less vulnerable position, Leeteuk asks warily, “Who are you, and what do you want?” Even as he says that, his eyes flicker to the door, judging the distance between him and the door. At the same time, his mind does a mental check, running through a list of possible people he might have offended bad enough to warrant a visit from. He comes up with a blank.
“Well Leeteuk, I want a couple of things - you’ll know them eventually. As for my identity… you’ll know in a second.” Turning around, a smirk appears on the cold face of the stranger. “As for now, though, I want you.”
At the sight of the man, Leeteuk’s heartbeat stutters, and for the briefest of seconds, his mask drops.
.end of chapter one
chapter two preview: It is late autumn when Park Jungsoo, head of the student council, meets Kim Youngwoon, head of the group-of-people-you-will-meet-in-alcoholic’s-anonymous-or-jail-if-you-don’t-study-harder. At that time, Jungsoo doesn't know who Youngsoon is, yet. The first thing he sees is Youngwoon’s back, and the next thing he knows, that back is moving away from him. Fast.
PG-13
mostly mafia!au, but you get a side whore!au and school!au as well.
Summary: It has been five years since Leeteuk vanished from Kangin’s life. This is a story about their past, the present, and their future. This is a story about love and heartbreak, about facing up to reality, about how ‘moving on’ and ‘letting go’, although often preceding each other, are two entirely different things.
a/n: i know this pairing receives a lot of wank, but bear with me and give it a try, please. i tend to get distracted often so god knows if i'll complete this. it isn’t meant to be a long story, but we’ll see where that goes. i might branch out to different pairings as the story progresses, but that depends on whether i manage to successfully weave them in. every chapter will have something of the present, and maybe an excerpt from the past. they will be labelled accordingly, so don’t worry. i apologise if that makes it confusing, but as mentioned in the summary, this story isn’t just about the present; the past plays an integral role as well, because really… it’s the past that defines who we are.
* anonymous commenting is enabled, IP-logging is off, so go ahead and spit out all the dirt you can find about this story, it’ll help me tremendously.
.intro
(Did you know? That despite it being five fucking years since I’d last seen you, I still think about you so often that it’s as though you’ve never left. On the fifteen of every February, I still buy a box of chocolates with champagne to go with and leave it under the bench of that old park. On the first of every July, I still make a sloppy, hand-written card for you and post it to your old mailing address. On the seventeen of every December, I buy another anklet for the both of us. Are you surprised? Do you perhaps pity me?
Well darling, on every one of those nights, I go to the same bar we’d met in, pick a girl there to bring back and proceed to fuck her senseless, so you can take back that sympathy.)
Their love story has never been one of head-over-heels romance. It starts out cliché enough: Park Jungsoo being every teacher’s favourite student and heading the school council, and Kim Youngwoon being the school’s bad boy, the one who brings down the school’s reputation. Jungsoo is the one you would see studying in the library until dusk, the one with immaculate attire and extremely neat handwriting. Youngwoon is the one you would see ‘looking for a pen’ through the keyhole of the girl’s bathroom. Jungsoo is the one who has never broken a school rule in his life and Youngwoon is the one who… to put simply, breaks every school rule in a week.
The important thing though, is that this Jungsoo, the one with straight A’s, the one who has his life planned out for him, the one who envisions himself with a loving wife by his side (163cm, eyes that would curve into half-moons when she laughs) in the future, falls in love with Kim Youngwoon.
And this Youngwoon, the one with straight F’s, the one who never really gives a damn about his future, the one who thinks commitment is a terrifying issue, he loves Jungsoo back with all his heart.
.chapter one (winter, 2009)
[Jungsoo.]
It is late by the time he gets back to his room. Loosening his tie, he shrugs off his jacket, draping it over a desk chair before looking around the tastefully furnished hotel room without much appreciation. Just as he is about to cross over to draw the curtains close, he gets interrupted by the ringing of the door.
“Room service,” a voice rings out.
Letting a small smile grace his usually impassive face, he strides towards the doorway corridor of his executive room. “Finally,” he thinks. Now, he can at least get a decent night’s rest. It is his fault for not bringing his sleeping pills, but that does not matter anymore. He started depending on them five years ago, and he has absolutely no idea how he still managed to forget them.
“Must be my failing memory,” he muses and smiles inwardly - Heechul will have a field day when he gets back from his business trip. In fact, he can already hear the taunting voice mocking him with its usual gleeful mirth.
To his surprise, when he pushes open the door, there is no one. Immediately, his hackles rise. Years of experience has taught him to be wary and be on the lookout for something amiss. In fact, being constantly alert has been ingrained into him. Looking around carefully, he narrows his eyes and tries to detect any heavy breathing or telltale signs that will give away a person on the prey. However, even with every one of his senses on the alert, he is unable to detect anything. Shaking his head, he gives the hallway one final, sweeping look before turning around to head back to his room. It could just be kids, he reasons. Kids were annoying creatu-
He does not manage to complete his train of thought before an elbow gives a sharp, precise jab on one of his nerve points.
Leeteuk’s world goes black.
.excerpt (winter, 2003)
[Jungsoo.]
“I’m bored, humour me.”
Glancing at Youngwoon, who has unceremoniously pushed Jungsoo’s bag away from the chair next to Jungsoo and dumped himself on it, he frowns.
“Open your books and actually study for once, maybe then you’ll find out that the world is actually much more interesting than what you perceive it to be, and life wouldn’t be so boring anymore,” he snaps as he bends to the side to retrieve his bag. He had been in the middle of a particularly hard algebraic equation and was close to solving it when Youngwoon disrupted his train of thoughts. Naturally, he is none too pleased about that.
Over to his right, Youngwoon’s eyes widen. “Whoa, what’s wrong with you? I swear, studying too hard all the time has gotten to your brain. Do you even know the meaning of sitting back and relaxing? Life’s too short to spend the whole time buried into books, darling,” Youngwoon says, grabbing Jungsoo’s hands and staring at him seriously.
Jerking his hand out of Kangin’s grip, Jungsoo ignores him and crushes the paper in front of him, opting instead to start over on a new sheet of paper.
Withdrawing his hands from the table, Youngwoon leans back and sighs. “Okay, fine. Ignore me if you want to. Just answer some questions of mine, and then you’re free to continue being a nerd, okay?”
Chewing on his pen thoughtfully, Jungsoo tries his best to ignore Youngwoon, focusing his attention on the algebraic question instead. However, Youngwoon’s next words blows Jungsoo off.
“Are you a prostitute?”
Snapping his head up to stare at Youngwoon, he gasps, “What? No! Of course not!”
Grinning easily, Youngwoon props his elbows on the table, before leaning his head on his palms and staring at Jungsoo innocently. “Oh well. You’re hot, so I figured you could be one.” Smirking, Youngwoon continues, “Would you ever consider a one-night stand then?”
“No!”
“Pity. It’s fine though, I figured you were a romantic anyway,” Laughing, he ignores Jungsoo’s outraged expression and brings his nails to his lips to chew thoughtfully on them, pondering frown on his face.
“Go ahead and do your work, the rest of the questions aren’t that bad now.”
Jungsoo stares at Youngwoon suspiciously, before saying in a wary tone, “You’d better mean that.” Upon receiving a somewhat innocent nod from Youngwoon, he wrinkles his nose at Youngwoon, before trying to focus on his work once again. He really has to get these questions done.
“Do you know how to cycle?”
“...Nope.”
“That’s alright. I could have you as a passenger hugging me, I guess. Ever stolen a bike?”
And so the endless tirade of questions, ranging from normal ones to outrageous ones, goes on, with Jungsoo saying a bored ‘no’ to every question. Eventually, it gets to the point where he replies a ‘no’ automatically.
“Would you consider going out with me?” Youngwoon grins and bats his eyelashes to the auburn, messy strands of Jungsoo’s hair - because he is too absorbed in his work to bother looking at Youngwoon while he speaks.
“No,” is the instantaneous reply.
“Are you straight?”
“No - What?”
Laughing and punching the air gleefully, Youngwoon leans in and whispers huskily, “So… Why won’t you consider going out with me?”
Brushing his lips against Jungsoo’s cheeks, Youngwoon straightens and stretches, grin still on his face as he saunters off without waiting for a reply, missing the slight flush on Jungsoo’s cheeks.
(winter 2009)
[Jungsoo.]
When Leeteuk awakens, it is to the feeling of an almost trembling finger caressing the planes of his angular face and the tingling, unnerving sensation of being watched. As he slowly regains his senses, Leeteuk remembers how he’d opened the hotel door and got knocked cold. Fuck, he curses inwardly. How had he gotten so careless?
Although he barely stirs or moves a muscle upon awaking, his perpetrator seems to know he is awake. The finger withdraws, but the sensation of being watched remains. For a minute, there is no sound except for the steady breathing of Leeteuk and the stranger, but that changes soon enough.
“Open your eyes,” A rough baritone orders from several feet away. It seems like the man has moved.
Leeteuk’s eyelids flutter once and snap open. Pupils dilating to focus better in the dim light, his gaze sweeps across the same hotel room he checked in to, before focusing on the back of a sturdy figure by the window.
Shifting his splayed body to a less vulnerable position, Leeteuk asks warily, “Who are you, and what do you want?” Even as he says that, his eyes flicker to the door, judging the distance between him and the door. At the same time, his mind does a mental check, running through a list of possible people he might have offended bad enough to warrant a visit from. He comes up with a blank.
“Well Leeteuk, I want a couple of things - you’ll know them eventually. As for my identity… you’ll know in a second.” Turning around, a smirk appears on the cold face of the stranger. “As for now, though, I want you.”
At the sight of the man, Leeteuk’s heartbeat stutters, and for the briefest of seconds, his mask drops.
.end of chapter one
chapter two preview: It is late autumn when Park Jungsoo, head of the student council, meets Kim Youngwoon, head of the group-of-people-you-will-meet-in-alcoholic’s-anonymous-or-jail-if-you-don’t-study-harder. At that time, Jungsoo doesn't know who Youngsoon is, yet. The first thing he sees is Youngwoon’s back, and the next thing he knows, that back is moving away from him. Fast.