(no subject)
okay back i just need to vent i dont give a fuck anymore i am just now realizing that cant put on a front anymore i am sick and tired of shyt and hiding certain things about me yes i cut and yes it feels good no i am not as happy as i seem yes i usually cry myself to sleep at night when i am at my house no one cares about me the only good thing i have going right now is my apartment and graduation i dont fucking care about europe or the bahamas anymore i dont give a rats ass i dont even want to go anymore i dont care about school i am now talking to them and damn i dont know whats going on i dont know whats going thru our heads all i know is a am completely lost in this world without my i guess you could say the one i love and i dont know all i know is i am going out to my apartment tonight me and cindy are going to drink and probably get some other stuff and just get fucked up and not give a fuck about anyone or anything cuz thats how i feel right now and about ashton i dont know where we stand for a while i thought she actually did care but i guess i was wrong and i dont know if i am or not we are so cool one minute then the next minute she a nd i are fighting and yelling or she hangs up on me and i call her back yelling either way we always make up but we will always have problems no matter how mature we have gotten or how much alike or differ we are i think deep down inside we hate each other cuz i honestly dont like anything about her i cant stand her or her friends ( but her friends have nothing to do with it ) well we are talking right now and i am just lost with words well i guess i am going to go and get ready and to help everyone out no i didnt cut for me to cuty it takes more than just reading something i have no go now tho so i will update more later bye..........