Can people really change?
Okay so I can't sleep.
Soooo much has happened within a month. So much pain, anger, and betrayal. All the lies and heartache I went through would probably be too much for one person to take. I'm surprised I made it out alive. I was a fool and was proven a fool by so many people. Mostly by the one I cared about most. I should have known. The moment I saw her, I knew she was trouble. He swore. Over and over. And I believed him. Like an idiot. I defended him. Like an idiot. I would have never guessed in a million years.....after all our history.....everything....that he would do this to me. Right after our "anniversary". I've seen his dark side. I've seen his true colors. He became everything I truly hate. I still don't completely understand why he did this. I did nothing to deserve it. Nothing.
Through recently (or after I found out), there has also been so much love. The love I should have had in the first place. It's sad I had to go through hell for him to realize it. He's being his old self again. It's like as if nothing ever happened. Although of course I can never forget it. He says he's serious this time. Well I'm not sure what to believe. Actions speak louder than words. So far so good I guess. Ugh, it's not fair. It really isn't. Can people really change? I want to believe it. I want to soooo bad. It's been a month. And obviously it still hurts.
It will always hurt. I know this. But I want to at least try to get over it. I want to try and be happy. People do it all the time right? It's just real hard. Ha! I should have kicked her ass the moment she step foot in my home. That bitch needs to pay. Of course that's just my anger talking. And my immature side is wanting revenge. But what kind of person does this? I'm not just talking about her. Ughhhh whatever. I'm ganna try to get some sleep. Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully things will get better. Nite.
Soooo much has happened within a month. So much pain, anger, and betrayal. All the lies and heartache I went through would probably be too much for one person to take. I'm surprised I made it out alive. I was a fool and was proven a fool by so many people. Mostly by the one I cared about most. I should have known. The moment I saw her, I knew she was trouble. He swore. Over and over. And I believed him. Like an idiot. I defended him. Like an idiot. I would have never guessed in a million years.....after all our history.....everything....that he would do this to me. Right after our "anniversary". I've seen his dark side. I've seen his true colors. He became everything I truly hate. I still don't completely understand why he did this. I did nothing to deserve it. Nothing.
Through recently (or after I found out), there has also been so much love. The love I should have had in the first place. It's sad I had to go through hell for him to realize it. He's being his old self again. It's like as if nothing ever happened. Although of course I can never forget it. He says he's serious this time. Well I'm not sure what to believe. Actions speak louder than words. So far so good I guess. Ugh, it's not fair. It really isn't. Can people really change? I want to believe it. I want to soooo bad. It's been a month. And obviously it still hurts.
It will always hurt. I know this. But I want to at least try to get over it. I want to try and be happy. People do it all the time right? It's just real hard. Ha! I should have kicked her ass the moment she step foot in my home. That bitch needs to pay. Of course that's just my anger talking. And my immature side is wanting revenge. But what kind of person does this? I'm not just talking about her. Ughhhh whatever. I'm ganna try to get some sleep. Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully things will get better. Nite.