In the Dark
"When I walk out this door, I walk out alone and in the dark"
Thats a quote from Ray, and I find it true most days.
Some days I feel like I am trapt in darkness with only a foot of light on all sides to guide me. What choice i have made lay behind me, the ability to change the present on the left and right, and the chance to change the future ahead of me.
I am not afraid of the dark, but lonelyness yes.
No one wants to be alone, no one wants that
What to do is the question.
I have been asked a couple of times to lay on the backbunner. To stay in the background until the foreground is done unfolding. For someone like me, a person of action, thats very hard to swallow.
Asked to let my love, my future, my thoughts, my feelings, my everything....just wait.
I know that patience is a virtue, but I can be patient with everything else, but this no.
So, It has cost me some relationships...it has cost me some time, it has cost me a lot.
Looking back at it, I know I was wrong to force things that couldnt be force. I know I should have just waited in the shadows until (if ever) my number was pulled.
You live, You learn, You die...
I have just recently come to realize some of the wrongs in the past. I have done my best over the last couple of months to correct them. Calling people I should haved called, Making right to people I have wronged, Forming relationships that I threw away....
Once a man ask for forgiveness, he is forgave and never judged again....
New, Every entry comes with a quote
"Inside of Insanity is sanity" - Holton Saxon
Thats a quote from Ray, and I find it true most days.
Some days I feel like I am trapt in darkness with only a foot of light on all sides to guide me. What choice i have made lay behind me, the ability to change the present on the left and right, and the chance to change the future ahead of me.
I am not afraid of the dark, but lonelyness yes.
No one wants to be alone, no one wants that
What to do is the question.
I have been asked a couple of times to lay on the backbunner. To stay in the background until the foreground is done unfolding. For someone like me, a person of action, thats very hard to swallow.
Asked to let my love, my future, my thoughts, my feelings, my everything....just wait.
I know that patience is a virtue, but I can be patient with everything else, but this no.
So, It has cost me some relationships...it has cost me some time, it has cost me a lot.
Looking back at it, I know I was wrong to force things that couldnt be force. I know I should have just waited in the shadows until (if ever) my number was pulled.
You live, You learn, You die...
I have just recently come to realize some of the wrongs in the past. I have done my best over the last couple of months to correct them. Calling people I should haved called, Making right to people I have wronged, Forming relationships that I threw away....
Once a man ask for forgiveness, he is forgave and never judged again....
New, Every entry comes with a quote
"Inside of Insanity is sanity" - Holton Saxon