(no subject)
Well, its pretty evident right now that my feelings are still day to day. Last night, I could feel no pain. This morning and today well, is another story. I was told i would wake up each morning and feel better but, I cant say that has happened yet.
i cant believe so much happened over the fricking internet. We were together for over a year this time, and yet still broke up on the internet. I dont think thats going to sit well with me for quite some time. I was more than willing to go up there and was planning to tomorrow, like i had been all along. I wanted to talk about it. I know that we are over, but I still thought maybe it would do me good to really hear it, see her say it, know this is what she wants. But, of course im not going to get that chance now.
So instead of going up there, I guess im just going home. The only part that im not going to like, is having to go home and explain what happened to a hundred more people. I think i just want to be left alone, and everywhere i look, there is something that reminds me of her. It drives me crazy. I think im going to have to bring out the box again. Not because i hate her, but because if this is how it has to be, i cant be reminded of her all of the time.
What else is there to say? Im going to go and live my life without her, for as long as it takes. I keep on checking my phone, aim from time to time, even my mailbox, but by now i know better. She probably doesnt even read these anyway. Its hard to break old habbits, ill say that much. Im sure ill stop eventually. And ill live with the despiration conversations because eventually theyll be gone too. Man do i know this all too well, and i really thought we were past this.
For the record I’m tired
I’ve been running for days
But I can’t hide anymore
It's time to just settle here
The rain beats on my head
And I’m tired and cold
But I need shelter and sleep
so I can dream of a day when I return and I’m so bitter to you
I bet you left me out here
Along with the wolves
But I have a book on skills
To survive in the woods
Winters right around the bend and I’m scared
I’m planning for a storm that will blow the roof and doors off of every home
From here to LA
From here to LA
Should I follow you here
But I don’t know you like that
Should I give you my keys
And see if you will come back
This time
i cant believe so much happened over the fricking internet. We were together for over a year this time, and yet still broke up on the internet. I dont think thats going to sit well with me for quite some time. I was more than willing to go up there and was planning to tomorrow, like i had been all along. I wanted to talk about it. I know that we are over, but I still thought maybe it would do me good to really hear it, see her say it, know this is what she wants. But, of course im not going to get that chance now.
So instead of going up there, I guess im just going home. The only part that im not going to like, is having to go home and explain what happened to a hundred more people. I think i just want to be left alone, and everywhere i look, there is something that reminds me of her. It drives me crazy. I think im going to have to bring out the box again. Not because i hate her, but because if this is how it has to be, i cant be reminded of her all of the time.
What else is there to say? Im going to go and live my life without her, for as long as it takes. I keep on checking my phone, aim from time to time, even my mailbox, but by now i know better. She probably doesnt even read these anyway. Its hard to break old habbits, ill say that much. Im sure ill stop eventually. And ill live with the despiration conversations because eventually theyll be gone too. Man do i know this all too well, and i really thought we were past this.
For the record I’m tired
I’ve been running for days
But I can’t hide anymore
It's time to just settle here
The rain beats on my head
And I’m tired and cold
But I need shelter and sleep
so I can dream of a day when I return and I’m so bitter to you
I bet you left me out here
Along with the wolves
But I have a book on skills
To survive in the woods
Winters right around the bend and I’m scared
I’m planning for a storm that will blow the roof and doors off of every home
From here to LA
From here to LA
Should I follow you here
But I don’t know you like that
Should I give you my keys
And see if you will come back
This time