my window is very dirty
and sometimes all it takes is one weekend. a weekend of drinking, the kind where you think you're sober and then it hits you that you're just not. a weekend of running into people and watching growing pains movies and getting enough sleep. and a day of shopping and walking out in the wind and surprise phone calls that you run to answer after untangling yourself from a chair. and a ride home from someone who was nice enough to just offer. a rainbow outside your window that lasts long enough to get a picture of. the ability to download music again. phone calls that make me laugh rather than cry. i've had a good day, the first one in two weeks. it's so simple now that i read over it. but i've been calm. i haven't cried since thursday and sadly, that is a big deal. maybe (maybemaybemaybe) things are looking up, or at least starting to.