so numb
I keep finding more and more crap about my Dad, and not good things either. It's making my whole fuckin world fall apart right now and it hurts. When your father figure becomes this whole new person to you it's an unsettling feeling.
I've dealt with shit pertaining to him for my whole life and I want it to be over. No new suprises no more outbreaks..he is on meds now but it haunts me for life that he use to go off the deep end. Eventually it led to being in a mental hospital and he got help. A year ago we found out he was bi-polar, then last month he overcame alcohol which started being a problem.. Apparently he has OCD and it's not like counting how many chips are in a bag or anything. He gets obessesed with shit and can't stop doing whatever it is. I should be supportive I have been supportive but right now I can't do that.
I know his life was fucked up that he has major issues but as I get older it's harder to deal with it's harder to keep forgiving and forgetting.
Does this make me less of a person or the lesser person??
I've dealt with shit pertaining to him for my whole life and I want it to be over. No new suprises no more outbreaks..he is on meds now but it haunts me for life that he use to go off the deep end. Eventually it led to being in a mental hospital and he got help. A year ago we found out he was bi-polar, then last month he overcame alcohol which started being a problem.. Apparently he has OCD and it's not like counting how many chips are in a bag or anything. He gets obessesed with shit and can't stop doing whatever it is. I should be supportive I have been supportive but right now I can't do that.
I know his life was fucked up that he has major issues but as I get older it's harder to deal with it's harder to keep forgiving and forgetting.
Does this make me less of a person or the lesser person??