AAAAAAAAAAARGH!
i am at the point of tears because i'm so frustrated and angry and just...ugh! i cannot stand it. i'm totally being a bitch to everyone and it makes me feel even worse, because i'm not mad at any of my friends, but i take it out on them rather than go to the source. but i can't go to the source, because i don't know what it is!
but i have one reason, and a good reason, for being pissed off and frustrated. here's my issue that i know for a fact is ONE reason i feel like shit. it's long so brace yourself.
within the past 4 days i've made a whole bunch of money through babysitting, and payday was on friday. so anyway, my brother had his friends over and i was either not home or i was on the computer, far away from where my room is. well, on sunday i had $39 in my purse, and when i went get my money out so i could go shopping, i found only $14. ok, i bet you're thinking i just misplaced my money and it wasn't all put in my purse. but that's the thing, i borrowed $10 to my brother earlier that day making my money count go from $49 to $39, i even counted after making the deduction.
i was missing one 20 and one 5.
then today, after my brother left with those SAME FRIENDS, i went upstairs to make sure all my money was in my purse where i had left it, (it was then at $39 again because i got $20 yesterday). and ya know what i found? $14 again. WHAT THE HELL?! now, i don't want to tell my dad because i don't want anybody to get in trouble and i hate yelling matches between my dad and anybody, because he scares me when he yells. and i don't want to place the blame on any one person or persons, but come on! the SAME people come over and leave, and my HARD EARNED money has vanished from inside MY purse?
and it wouldn't piss me off so much, but i do actually work for my money, i babysit (and that is hard work because i hate little kids and takes an effort for me to play with them and not just send them to their room), and i have a paper route (yes a paper route ). unlike my brother and his one friend (who i suspect is stealing from me) who don't work for their money. his friend mooches off of her boyfriend, and my brother gets an allowance for doing absolutely nothing. also, going through my purse?! i think it's horrible for anybody to go through a girl's purse, it's my personal space and no one needs to know what i keep in it or anything (though i have nothign to hide).
i hate confronting people.
so my question is, what should i do? i've already talked to my brother and he said that he'll talk to her, but i doubt he will, he'll forget. but like i said, i can't confront people...i just can't. and also as i said, i really don't want to tell my dad. but today i was so angry i was at the point of tears. i was thinking of writing a note to her and leaving it in open view in my brother's room so that she can see it when she comes back over tonight.
i've also decided to cut my brother off from all money that i would usually and gladly lend to him, even knowing that i'll probably never get paid back.
there's one of my problems.
another is that i feel like i've been abandoned by all of my friends. i mean, we hang out and stuff, but i always feel like i can't talk to them. i don't know. i just need to be away..i wish there was a way i could get away from everything for a while. i think i need to be put in a room by myself for a week with no human contact, just my cd player and cds, a fridge full of fruit, and a bed. that's all i need. just a week away from people. too bad that's an unrealistic fantasy.
but i have one reason, and a good reason, for being pissed off and frustrated. here's my issue that i know for a fact is ONE reason i feel like shit. it's long so brace yourself.
within the past 4 days i've made a whole bunch of money through babysitting, and payday was on friday. so anyway, my brother had his friends over and i was either not home or i was on the computer, far away from where my room is. well, on sunday i had $39 in my purse, and when i went get my money out so i could go shopping, i found only $14. ok, i bet you're thinking i just misplaced my money and it wasn't all put in my purse. but that's the thing, i borrowed $10 to my brother earlier that day making my money count go from $49 to $39, i even counted after making the deduction.
i was missing one 20 and one 5.
then today, after my brother left with those SAME FRIENDS, i went upstairs to make sure all my money was in my purse where i had left it, (it was then at $39 again because i got $20 yesterday). and ya know what i found? $14 again. WHAT THE HELL?! now, i don't want to tell my dad because i don't want anybody to get in trouble and i hate yelling matches between my dad and anybody, because he scares me when he yells. and i don't want to place the blame on any one person or persons, but come on! the SAME people come over and leave, and my HARD EARNED money has vanished from inside MY purse?
and it wouldn't piss me off so much, but i do actually work for my money, i babysit (and that is hard work because i hate little kids and takes an effort for me to play with them and not just send them to their room), and i have a paper route (yes a paper route ). unlike my brother and his one friend (who i suspect is stealing from me) who don't work for their money. his friend mooches off of her boyfriend, and my brother gets an allowance for doing absolutely nothing. also, going through my purse?! i think it's horrible for anybody to go through a girl's purse, it's my personal space and no one needs to know what i keep in it or anything (though i have nothign to hide).
i hate confronting people.
so my question is, what should i do? i've already talked to my brother and he said that he'll talk to her, but i doubt he will, he'll forget. but like i said, i can't confront people...i just can't. and also as i said, i really don't want to tell my dad. but today i was so angry i was at the point of tears. i was thinking of writing a note to her and leaving it in open view in my brother's room so that she can see it when she comes back over tonight.
i've also decided to cut my brother off from all money that i would usually and gladly lend to him, even knowing that i'll probably never get paid back.
there's one of my problems.
another is that i feel like i've been abandoned by all of my friends. i mean, we hang out and stuff, but i always feel like i can't talk to them. i don't know. i just need to be away..i wish there was a way i could get away from everything for a while. i think i need to be put in a room by myself for a week with no human contact, just my cd player and cds, a fridge full of fruit, and a bed. that's all i need. just a week away from people. too bad that's an unrealistic fantasy.