I..........
i failed! i failed failed failed!!!! i tried to get a job at the piano store and i couldnt get it because they wanted me to have sails experience....i dont. like i said before, i can play the piano but not as well as they would want me to. i always spend so much time imagining that i can play such great piano songs. i dream about it so much that i have begun to think it was true. i'm sad. i need a job. still. yep here i am, no job and very little piano skill. ok. i have to do something. i'm starting to be able to feel time go by and i have yet to get up and find something to do. i have to get a job. i miss my friend. i dont know if you know the one i'm talking about but i do. everyday i know who i'm talking about. and everyday goes by without me being allowed to talk to him. ALLOWED!!?? thats right. allowed. no phone calls, emails, aim, livejournal or myspace. today is his birthday and i dont even get to wish him happy birthday. i dont care how everyone else feels about it because no one cares how i feel about it. but i cant even call him. let me be honest when i say that i have indeed tried, i would have talked to him too but i guess his phone didnt work. i tried to email him but when i sent the message it didnt work. i tried to become his friend on myspace but he doesnt use it often i even tried to talk to him through livejournal but he doesnt use that very often either. people will be mad that i tried to talk to him. well fine!!!! i know how they feel but maybe they dont know how i feel. if they dont want to have anything to do with him then they dont have to. i was never and will never try to get them to talk to anyone they dont want to but i am entitled to have my friends. just because i'm friends with him doesnt mean they have to be. and just because they're not friends with him doesnt mean i cant be.i dont know if i'm feeling anger, sadness, frustration or if i'm feeling discontent so i have no idea what i'll put for my mood.