Run
Wow...I don't even know what to say anymore. I'm so unbelievably happy! I finally did something for myself for once it and it all turned out perfect...maybe this means something. I guess maybe I'll do that more often rather than trying to fix everyone else's life and failing...even though there's nothing that I could've done in the first place. But I'm finally happy and I that's all that matters. There's no words for how happy I am...it's just so...weird, but in a good way. It's like I don't even have anything to think about anymore but being happy and I just can't help but smile about it...and with how much I think about it...I smile all the time. It really scares me sometimes not having everything to think about...but then I know that it's all for the better. He's really that perfect "nice" guy for me too...someone that I've only dreamt of. Even though he said he'd love me if I kept with the drugs and alcohol...he'd rather I quit them. But with how happy he makes me...I don't need the drugs or alcohol to make me happy anymore. I'm already happy, so why ruin it? I've promised him to quit and it really doesn't bother me to say it...I'm actually quite proud of it. I finally realized that I don't need any of that shit anymore...I've got what I've always wanted and I'm not going to give it up over stupid things that only last a few hours. I really don't even know what to type...it's great. It really is. I love you Chris...so much!!!<3333