A tear for you from my selfish heart
What a week you know. I guess it started good. I had my homecoming dress, adam could go to homecoming, heather was gonna come and do my hair, keith had a girlfriend. Well... I still have my homecoming dress, adam can still go, i don't think heather is going to do my hair since she isn't coming because guys are fxckers and you know what girls are fxckers too, keith doesn't have a girlfriend now either. Do we just date someone to make them feel wonderful one moment and want to gauge their own eyes out the next. I was extremly upset last night, spent practically the whole time I talk to adam flipping out on him and then writing the poem i posted on livejournal. Brad tried to help me, he sugested such things that i have put in to consideration but am not ready in my head to go through with just yet. This weekend is awsome for everyone (kinda everyone)! Justine gets to go to Brads dance... now try and tell me that doesn't fxcking rock. Adam is being all social and going to helen's for a party?... or something along the lines of that matter. I myself will be at home. Maybe I can find something to do, I want to go to the movies. So I am kinda bored right now and as a result i am doing a survey i have NEVER done before. Brad you might like this one enough to put on your journal too. Oh yeah i am also gonna post a picture of my homecoming dress. I don't think it will be fun but i already bought the dress and then i have to dish out $40 for the tickets. Also picture day is Monday so my mom is paying for that. ALSO i am going to newyork through my english class which cost $75 by next week. Then towards the end of the year I am buying my class ring for about $150. I also have to buy a lacrose stick so i can play spring season $30. WHY IS SCHOOL SO FXCKING EXPENSIVE?
Oh well here is my dress, PLEASE coment what you think of it...
So here is the survey I promised...
Name: Courtney
Nickname: Court
Birthday: October 25
Birthplace: Newark, Delaware
=Now=
Current mood: a bit upset, a bit pissed off, bored, lonely, random, confussed... shall i continue?
Current music: None, unless the comercial for Cambell's Chunky Soup quallifies as music
Current taste: Dinner, parmasan noodles with hamburer mixed in
Current hair: All shaggy like, very pretty i have been told today :D
Current clothes: Blue jeans, black t-shirt, and grey hoodie
Current annoyance: If you know than you know, if you don't then you aren't meant to
Current smell: Dinner
Current thing I ought to be doin: Nothing, acctually have nothing to do.
Current windows open: The one i am updating on and my AIM express window... also the two front windows in my house and my mom and sisters and mine.
Current desktop picture: Plain light blue
Current favorite band: Control Freaks
Current book: Wicked and Tith
Current cd in stereo: The Ramones... I am searching for a cover song for my future band to use to start off with.
Current crush: My knowledge not yours...
Current favorite celeb: Johnny Depp
Current hate: I hate guys. I hate chicks. I hate the way i feel.
=Do I=
Smoke?: Nope
Do drugs?: Nope
Have sex?: Nope
Give oral sex?: Nope
Receive oral sex?: Nope
Have a dream that keeps coming back?: All of the time
Remember your first love?:Yes
Still love him/her?: I want to say yes
Read the newspaper?: Only on sundays
Have any gay or lesbian friends?: Yes
Believe in miracles?: No, you make your fate.
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: Depends on what you are staying faithful to.
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: I try to stay calm in any situation but I tend to lose my cool.
Consider love a mistake?: I don't think I do. Some of the things that happen to you through love may be a mistake though.
Like the taste of alcohol?: Yes
Have a favorite candy?: Yuppers.
Believe in astrology?: Yes.
Believe in magic?: Yes.
Believe in god?: I don't think I believe in the god you are refering to.
Have any pets: Yes.
Go to or plan to go to college: I plan to.
Have any piercings?: Yes.
Have any tattoos?: No.
Hate yourself: I don't hate myself but I hate the things I do, thinks i think and the way i look sometimes but never just myself.
Have an obsession?: OH YEAH... Laurie knows ; )
Have a secret crush?: I guess.
Do they know yet?: Yes.
Have a best friend?: I don't know.. if you want to fill the position tell me okay?
Wish on stars?: Yes. If the wishes come true is another question...
Care about looks?: My own yes. others not as much.
=Love life=
First crush: His name was Micheal it was in the 2nd grade.
First kiss: 3rd grade playing truth or dare, William.
Single or attached?: Attached I supose.
Ever been in love?: I want to think so.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: It might exist for some people.
Do you believe in "the one?": I don't know.
Describe your ideal significant other: I can't, I don't know what my idea of my signifigant other is, but i hope one day when i wake up... he will be there.
=Juicy stuff=
Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: No.
Have you ever been intoxicated?: No.
Favorite place to be kissed?: Hmm i don't know if I was kissed then maybe I would.
Have you ever been caught "doing something?": Yes, but it wasn't that intense, it was just me kissing a guy when i wasn't supose to be dating.
Are you a tease?: No.
Shy to make the first move?: No, but i don't think I will anymore.
=Word association=
Rubber: Ducky
Rock: Paper, Scisors
Green: Day ::purrs, Billy Joel Armstrong..::
Wet: Slip and slide
Cry: My worst past time.
Peanut: An offspring of a peanut plant
Hay: Scare crows
Cold: Alcohol
Steamy: NOT my life (haha)
Fast: 145mph
Freaky: Deaky
Rain: Tears
Bite: ME!
fuck: You
Blow: Away
Religion: None
--APPEARANCE:--
Hair: Orangey brown.
Eyes: Blue grey.
Height: 5'6.5"
--LAST THING YOU:--
Bought: A can of Code Red Mountain Dew
Ate & Drank: Dinner described as above and milk
Read: A paper in biology
Watched on tv: Full Hose
--EITHER / OR:--
club or houseparty: I am not invited to either... hah
beer or cider: Neither
drinks or shots: Drinks i guess
cats or dogs: Dogs
single or taken: Taken
pen or pencil: Pencil
gloves or mittens: Gloves but my kool ones that have no finger tips
food or candy: Candy
cassette or cd: CD
coke or pepsi: Coke
this or that: That
--WHO DO YOU WANT TO:--
kill: I don't want to kill anybody
get really wasted with: Myself, drinking away the time...
look like: Morticia Addams
be like: I don't know
avoid: Most people
--LAST PERSON YOU--
talked to: My dad
hugged: Laurie
instant messaged: Brad
kissed: Gawsh i don't remember
--WHERE DO YOU--
eat: Where there is food...
cry: Anywhere I need too
wish you were: Not here
--HAVE YOU EVER...--
Dated one of your best friends? No
Loved somebody so much it makes you cry? No
Drank alcohol? Yes
Done drugs? No
Broken the law? Don't think so.. or have I?
Run away from home? No
Broken a bone? No
Played Truth Or Dare? Yes
Kissed someone you didn't know? No
Been in a fight? Yes
Come close to dying? In my own way yes
--WHAT IS:--
The most embarrassing CD in your collection?: Oh god this is easy, the Usher CD i found in the back of my closet while cleaning... it is still in the wraper haha
Your bedroom like?: Blan, all white and balck and clear
Your favorite thing for breakfast? If i eat it is usually the breakfast sandwich at school
Your favorite restaurant?: None
--RANDOM QUESTIONS--
What's on your bedside table?: I have my desk next to my bed so 80% of my room is on it.
What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night?: I don't
What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie?: Tru Confessions
If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?: I wouldn't.
What is your biggest fear?: Getting killed
What feature are you most insecure about?: I hate my arms, I am not sure why
Do you ever have to beg?: Yes
Are you a pyromaniac?: I can be at times
Do you have too many love interests?: Maybe ; )
Crushes? ... oh yeah!
Do you know anyone famous?: Yes
Describe your bed: White bed sheets, two comforters, 3 blankets, three pillows and my baby wolf.
Spontaneous or plain?: Spontaneous all the way
Do you know how to play poker?: Yes
What do you carry with you at all times?: Myself
How do you drive?: Imaginary
What do you miss most about being little?: Tons and odles of things.
Are you happy with your given name?: Yes
How much money would it take to get you to give up the Internet for one year?: More than you can offer.
What color is your bedroom?: White, black and clear
What was the last song you were listening to?: "I just wana have something to do" -The Ramones
Have you ever been in a play?: Yes
Who are your best friends?: Who are you (do do do do do)
Do you talk a lot?: I think I do.
Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?: Not really
Do you think you're cute?: I do at times.
Do poor, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you? Not really
Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?: In a way, yes
Do you spend more time with your girlfriend, boyfriend, or your friends?: My friends becuase they seem to want to talk to me...
What is the first thing you think when you see two gay guys or lesbians holding hands?: I think they go out...
Ok I am going to sit here for my last ten minutes and tell myself that it is okay I haven't talked to my boyfriend. I love you all. Love me back?
*The unwinged angel*
Oh well here is my dress, PLEASE coment what you think of it...
So here is the survey I promised...
Name: Courtney
Nickname: Court
Birthday: October 25
Birthplace: Newark, Delaware
=Now=
Current mood: a bit upset, a bit pissed off, bored, lonely, random, confussed... shall i continue?
Current music: None, unless the comercial for Cambell's Chunky Soup quallifies as music
Current taste: Dinner, parmasan noodles with hamburer mixed in
Current hair: All shaggy like, very pretty i have been told today :D
Current clothes: Blue jeans, black t-shirt, and grey hoodie
Current annoyance: If you know than you know, if you don't then you aren't meant to
Current smell: Dinner
Current thing I ought to be doin: Nothing, acctually have nothing to do.
Current windows open: The one i am updating on and my AIM express window... also the two front windows in my house and my mom and sisters and mine.
Current desktop picture: Plain light blue
Current favorite band: Control Freaks
Current book: Wicked and Tith
Current cd in stereo: The Ramones... I am searching for a cover song for my future band to use to start off with.
Current crush: My knowledge not yours...
Current favorite celeb: Johnny Depp
Current hate: I hate guys. I hate chicks. I hate the way i feel.
=Do I=
Smoke?: Nope
Do drugs?: Nope
Have sex?: Nope
Give oral sex?: Nope
Receive oral sex?: Nope
Have a dream that keeps coming back?: All of the time
Remember your first love?:Yes
Still love him/her?: I want to say yes
Read the newspaper?: Only on sundays
Have any gay or lesbian friends?: Yes
Believe in miracles?: No, you make your fate.
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: Depends on what you are staying faithful to.
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: I try to stay calm in any situation but I tend to lose my cool.
Consider love a mistake?: I don't think I do. Some of the things that happen to you through love may be a mistake though.
Like the taste of alcohol?: Yes
Have a favorite candy?: Yuppers.
Believe in astrology?: Yes.
Believe in magic?: Yes.
Believe in god?: I don't think I believe in the god you are refering to.
Have any pets: Yes.
Go to or plan to go to college: I plan to.
Have any piercings?: Yes.
Have any tattoos?: No.
Hate yourself: I don't hate myself but I hate the things I do, thinks i think and the way i look sometimes but never just myself.
Have an obsession?: OH YEAH... Laurie knows ; )
Have a secret crush?: I guess.
Do they know yet?: Yes.
Have a best friend?: I don't know.. if you want to fill the position tell me okay?
Wish on stars?: Yes. If the wishes come true is another question...
Care about looks?: My own yes. others not as much.
=Love life=
First crush: His name was Micheal it was in the 2nd grade.
First kiss: 3rd grade playing truth or dare, William.
Single or attached?: Attached I supose.
Ever been in love?: I want to think so.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: It might exist for some people.
Do you believe in "the one?": I don't know.
Describe your ideal significant other: I can't, I don't know what my idea of my signifigant other is, but i hope one day when i wake up... he will be there.
=Juicy stuff=
Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: No.
Have you ever been intoxicated?: No.
Favorite place to be kissed?: Hmm i don't know if I was kissed then maybe I would.
Have you ever been caught "doing something?": Yes, but it wasn't that intense, it was just me kissing a guy when i wasn't supose to be dating.
Are you a tease?: No.
Shy to make the first move?: No, but i don't think I will anymore.
=Word association=
Rubber: Ducky
Rock: Paper, Scisors
Green: Day ::purrs, Billy Joel Armstrong..::
Wet: Slip and slide
Cry: My worst past time.
Peanut: An offspring of a peanut plant
Hay: Scare crows
Cold: Alcohol
Steamy: NOT my life (haha)
Fast: 145mph
Freaky: Deaky
Rain: Tears
Bite: ME!
fuck: You
Blow: Away
Religion: None
--APPEARANCE:--
Hair: Orangey brown.
Eyes: Blue grey.
Height: 5'6.5"
--LAST THING YOU:--
Bought: A can of Code Red Mountain Dew
Ate & Drank: Dinner described as above and milk
Read: A paper in biology
Watched on tv: Full Hose
--EITHER / OR:--
club or houseparty: I am not invited to either... hah
beer or cider: Neither
drinks or shots: Drinks i guess
cats or dogs: Dogs
single or taken: Taken
pen or pencil: Pencil
gloves or mittens: Gloves but my kool ones that have no finger tips
food or candy: Candy
cassette or cd: CD
coke or pepsi: Coke
this or that: That
--WHO DO YOU WANT TO:--
kill: I don't want to kill anybody
get really wasted with: Myself, drinking away the time...
look like: Morticia Addams
be like: I don't know
avoid: Most people
--LAST PERSON YOU--
talked to: My dad
hugged: Laurie
instant messaged: Brad
kissed: Gawsh i don't remember
--WHERE DO YOU--
eat: Where there is food...
cry: Anywhere I need too
wish you were: Not here
--HAVE YOU EVER...--
Dated one of your best friends? No
Loved somebody so much it makes you cry? No
Drank alcohol? Yes
Done drugs? No
Broken the law? Don't think so.. or have I?
Run away from home? No
Broken a bone? No
Played Truth Or Dare? Yes
Kissed someone you didn't know? No
Been in a fight? Yes
Come close to dying? In my own way yes
--WHAT IS:--
The most embarrassing CD in your collection?: Oh god this is easy, the Usher CD i found in the back of my closet while cleaning... it is still in the wraper haha
Your bedroom like?: Blan, all white and balck and clear
Your favorite thing for breakfast? If i eat it is usually the breakfast sandwich at school
Your favorite restaurant?: None
--RANDOM QUESTIONS--
What's on your bedside table?: I have my desk next to my bed so 80% of my room is on it.
What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night?: I don't
What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie?: Tru Confessions
If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?: I wouldn't.
What is your biggest fear?: Getting killed
What feature are you most insecure about?: I hate my arms, I am not sure why
Do you ever have to beg?: Yes
Are you a pyromaniac?: I can be at times
Do you have too many love interests?: Maybe ; )
Crushes? ... oh yeah!
Do you know anyone famous?: Yes
Describe your bed: White bed sheets, two comforters, 3 blankets, three pillows and my baby wolf.
Spontaneous or plain?: Spontaneous all the way
Do you know how to play poker?: Yes
What do you carry with you at all times?: Myself
How do you drive?: Imaginary
What do you miss most about being little?: Tons and odles of things.
Are you happy with your given name?: Yes
How much money would it take to get you to give up the Internet for one year?: More than you can offer.
What color is your bedroom?: White, black and clear
What was the last song you were listening to?: "I just wana have something to do" -The Ramones
Have you ever been in a play?: Yes
Who are your best friends?: Who are you (do do do do do)
Do you talk a lot?: I think I do.
Do you like yourself and believe in yourself?: Not really
Do you think you're cute?: I do at times.
Do poor, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you? Not really
Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?: In a way, yes
Do you spend more time with your girlfriend, boyfriend, or your friends?: My friends becuase they seem to want to talk to me...
What is the first thing you think when you see two gay guys or lesbians holding hands?: I think they go out...
Ok I am going to sit here for my last ten minutes and tell myself that it is okay I haven't talked to my boyfriend. I love you all. Love me back?
*The unwinged angel*