[for cameron] even I'm getting tired of useless desires

[fallen_ancient]

Late afternoon in her study, Morgan glanced over her shoulder at the shelves of Arthurian romances the bookshelf had seen fit to provide and she had kept. Her eyes closed, lips pursed with an irritation she rarely expressed in public. Between the false histories of her life - and not a true one to be found - and Cameron's behavior, she had more

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[sgmitchell]

He really wasn't in the best mood. The team had lost, he was going to hear about it from Austin, Zack, and Crichton. The alcohol had been poor, and...he was still on the island. That was reason enough to be irritated.

He was out of things to do for the day, and frankly he was exhausted. If Morgan had been at the game, he hadn't seen her. That was just fine with him. She probably would have been...congratulating Crichton or something. He wasn't about to consider what she'd been doing instead of watching the game. It wasn't his business, and she wasn't a cheerleader. She'd been pretty abundantly clear about that much.

He wasn't scowling so much as grimacing when he entered the hut. She wasn't there. His expression barely turned to thoughtfulness as to where she might have been, when she left the study.

Well, at least she used it, right?

A month ago, he'd have remarked on the food she'd missed. Tonight, he opted instead for a simple "There's leftovers in the kitchen."

[fallen_ancient]

She had not expected him to be home, and despite her mood, his presence initially shaped her lips into a half-curve of a smile. Yet by the time he had given her that sour look and spoken, it had retreated like the sun behind the clouds.

"As ever," she answered without stopping her forward motion toward the door, and coincidentally him. "However, I am not presently hungry."

[sgmitchell]

Oh...damn her and her magically appearing and vanishing smiles. It wasn't a fair thing to feel a stab of...regret, or whatever it chose to be today. He'd already lost the game to Crichton.

"And when would you get the chance to get anything to eat during the game? The kitchen had to be full preparing and cleaning up after the party."

[fallen_ancient]

Stopping when she had reached him, Morgan gave him an appraising look. Nothing had changed, and if anything he seemed more irritable than he had been. She had been right to seek to leave, and continued winding her shawl about her shoulders.

"I did not say that I had eaten. Only that I was not hungry." That she reverted to the lack of contractions perhaps proved the full measure of her own displeasure.

[sgmitchell]

What right did she have to be cold to him? He'd gone along with what she'd wanted. He'd let her do her own thing and chase after the whole island. What more could she want?

"Where are you going?" He gave another sour frown. "It's not like you have to worry about an excuse for a midnight rendezvous, Morgan."

[fallen_ancient]

Morgan leaned up to kiss him on the cheek as she always did when she left, but it was entirely perfunctory.

"I love you, Cameron. I have no liaisons planned, nor do I intend any." She stepped away, not stiff or angry, merely not wishing to engage his sulking further. "I am merely going out."

[sgmitchell]

Sometimes, he wondered if she knew what that word meant. Maybe he had less experience, but he was pretty damn sure they didn't speak English in Atlantis. As such, that gave him a bit more personal a knowledge of the inflections of the words--something he'd realized with just a second language. Let alone...500th, or whatever it must have been.

Any other night, he'd have left it at that. It wasn't like he was incapable of sleeping on his own, despite what it might've appeared. Tonight, he'd used up all of his good sportsmanship on the game.

"Generally, 'I love you' doesn't accompany leaving when said object of affection enters a room." His voice was sharp, but he shook his head quickly, bringing up a hand to wave off what would inevitably become a philosophical debate. "But you know...that doesn't matter. You wanna be alone, I'll go. I'm sure I'll still be on the island when I become interesting enough to interact with again."

[fallen_ancient]

Turning, Morgan pressed her shoulders to the door and folded her hands at her waist. She exhaled slowly, feeding her rising fury to her inner pool.

"I happened to be leaving when you arrived, and it is common to tell the object of one's affection that they are loved upon departure, doubly so here where I might disappear at any moment." She glanced along her nose at him. "Do not put this on me, Cameron. You are the one who has been avoiding me. You are the one who has chosen not to come home. You are the one who has turned your back to me in your sleep."

[sgmitchell]

Cameron was actually pretty good at controlling his emotions, if you asked him. However, he still didn't have any...secret enlightened trick to make it all disappear. That one he hadn't accomplished yet. Frankly, he wasn't sure he wanted to.

Cameron made an annoyed sound, and waved a hand in frustration. "I am not avoiding you! Maybe you missed it, but I never did anything! You are the one who just wants a cozy place to stay at night! Forgive me if I'm cooperating."

Composure. He still...had a hairsbreadth of it. Desperate though it might have been, he still had a measure of control.

[fallen_ancient]

Morgan would not dignify his denial with a response. He had been avoiding her and well he knew it. There would be no arguments on that score and it mattered not at all, in any event.

Dangerously quiet, Morgan said, "You are not cooperating. You are burying your head in the sand. You do not want me as I am. In fact, I am not certain that you want me at all. Yet you persist in holding to me out of habit." One more time, she met his gaze. "I love you, but I will not stay with you only to make you miserable."

[sgmitchell]

He ground his teeth in irritation, glaring at the older woman for a few long moments, before finding the proper words to reply. Angry and tired he might be, but if he hadn't learned how to phrase irritation properly, he would have never made it to lieutenant colonel with an impeccable record.

"Don't tell me what I feel, Morgan. Everything I said before was and is true. But the Morgan I knew was just one brief whim among a thousand, wasn't it?" He clenched his fists at his sides briefly, before shaking his head.

Composure. It was important.

"I don't even know what you want from me, Morgan. You don't want to be seen in public with me, you don't want companionship, and now you say this isn't good enough, either. What do you expect me to do, Morgan?"

There might have been a tone of desperation in his voice, but it was restrained to the best of his abilities.

[fallen_ancient]

Chin tilting, her lips shaped themselves into a curve Merlin would have warned Cameron was not, no matter how it looked it, a smile. He had called it many things, from mulish, to righteous, to downright terrifying, depending on what came out of her mouth next.

"I am Ganos Lal, last Ancient to leave Atlantis. I am Morgan Le Fay, legendary sorceress. And I am, without fail, Morgan of New Atlantis, Tabula Rasa. I am yours, first and foremost, if you will act like the man I know you are and stop sulking."

And stop fabricating untruths about her behavior of late, but she knew that to be a product of his resentment, rather than anything that could not be rectified. "You ask me what I want. I want you to make a choice. If you want me enough to give me my freedom, then stop blaming me for exercising it. If you do not, then let me go and stop hurting both of us."

[sgmitchell]

Sulking...maybe. He certainly felt like sulking. Had anything been accomplished? She'd just presented another conflicting statement. He had his doubts about how well she knew him.

Things had certainly seemed much more simple a few months back.

"Right...the old...if you love them, let them be free? You're conveniently leaving out the part about them coming back." He brought up a hand to run over his face, before shaking his head. The mantra of 'composure' was not working as well as he'd hope. "I would. Without a second thought, I'd wait until the old rhyme finished. But it won't, will it? There'll never come a day where one human life is enough. It'll never be important enough for you to give a damn about football games or masque events. You're not the sun dress, picket fence person, and I wouldn't make you it."

His anger was perilously perched on the edge of a much less acceptable reaction. Certainly not around a person who didn't care to make a passing inquiry about which team won

[fallen_ancient]

Most of what he said made very little sense. He had taken her words and twisted them into a nightmare seeming of themselves, turning her into the uncaring monster Daniel so often painted her kind to be

[sgmitchell]

She just...kept giving him nothing. No fuel, and no hope. They retreaded the same territory, and neither of them seemed to understand what the other was saying. He assumed she was speaking sense, and he was just...not understanding it. And he knew what he was saying.

He was...tired in so many ways.

"Should I? Would we actually spend any time together?" It just wasn't worth the effort to continue the statement, when she wasn't going to answer it anyway.

He waved a hand out vaguely, and sighed. This...just wasn't working, was it? It was a splendid ending to a terrible day.

"Was there anything that wasn't just...a failed experiment? Anything more than heated nights and the odd 'have a good day, be back after dinner'? Is there any common ground here

[fallen_ancient]

He was being ridiculous. Sulking like a hurt child because he wanted his favorite toy all to himself and she did not want to be owned