Sinning Twice - Shou x Hiroto,more to come - Prologue
Title: Sinning Twice
Chapters: Prologue
Author: fallen_am_i
Genre: Romance, Dramma,angst (?),some fluff maybe,some supernatural stuff
Warnings: No beta,incest,MxM relationgship. For this chapter : mention of character's death T-T
Rating: PG-13 for now
Pairing: Shou x Hiroto,Saga x Shou (just a mention), more to come
Synopsis: We all have many duties... There are some that have only one, that's their meaning in life. what happens when one of them does a terrible mistake?When he has to pay for that?
Disclaimer: I own the story only...
" Hey, Sagacchi... "
" Hmmm? "
" Do you believe in angels? "
They were outside, in Shou's garden. It was the first snow of the year, so beautyfull and white... The boys couldn't just stay in the house...They both loved snow so much, so they decided to enjoy it as much as they could. After an hour running around and shouting in mere happiness,and a lot of snowballs falling into their faces, they lied down on on the soft, yet cold ground.
" What are you talking about Shou - chan? " The small boy beside him clenched his fists. " We are ten now, we are not children to belive in such silly things! "
" Oh realy? " The taller boy with the wide eyes blushed, his cheek now coloured even redder than they were before because of the cold. " Then why did you make one with the snow? "
A hand with red gloves showed boldly the snow around Saga's hands and legs. It formed a figure with green - brown, due to the ground, wings.
" Ah, that.. " It was Saga's turn to blush. He turned his head away from Shou, his eyes now fixed on a large snowman who was tilting on the left - Saga insisted it needed more snow there and Shou couldn't dissagree with his bossy friend. " It just felt fun. "
Shou rolled his eyes. Saga was allways like that since he turned ten. He stopped believing in Santa, witches, magical creatures, generaly anything that helped imagination to stay alive. He kept saying he was a man now, and men don't cry, no believe in fairytales. Well, according to Shou, Saga was just an idiot doing so, but he couldn't do anything about the other's strong wil. So he kept dreaming away and imagining for both of them.
" Well, i belive in them, Saga! "
" No wonder... "
" Shut up! " Shou jumped up and moved his hyper self close to Saga. " My mom says they exist and i believe her! She told me yesterday that everyone in this world " he raised his hands in a big,open embrace towards the sky to show he was serious, " has an angel of his own, who guards him and takes care of him! "
He let a wide grin on his cute face and his imagination to travel far away in the sky, where some angels -his angel too, along with Saga's one- were looking at earth, for the people they were protecting. They were so beautyfull in Shou's mind, radiand, and wise, and -
" You are such a baby, Shou... " Saga shooked his head in desperation. " Grow up! Such things don't exist! "
" They do! " Shou stood up, now vissily angry with his friend. His face had the same red colour as his gloves, or even redder, and Saga could swear he saw smoke comming out of Shou's ears. " They keep us alive and healthy! "
" Oh? " Saga took his i-am-smarter-than-you-look, raising a brow on the other boy. He had a brilliant though. " Then why do people die? "
Shou though about it a bit, furrowing his brows as he unconsioussly rubbed his chin.
" Ummm, I guess when people grow old, angels take them to the sky, to keep them company... "
" No! Not the granies and grampas! " Saga rubbed his temple, losing his patience. " Why do young people die Shou? Kids, like you and me? "
Shou put his brain at work. He wanted to answer back at Saga, to show him that he was mistaken this time. But he found no answer, not one he liked at least.
" Well? " Saga crossed his arms, pressuring Shou to give an answer. Victory was mirrored insidehis eyes, he knew Shou couldn't say something smart again.
The taller boy entwined his fingers behind his back. He used to do that when he felt cornered.
" I-I don't know yet... "
" Ha! " Saga laughed, pointing his index finger at him. " Either they don't do their job right those... angels of yours, or... they just don't exist! Admitt it! "
Shou pouted. He hated when Saga won over something he liked. He was so proud of himself and many other things that were making Shou angry. He turned his back to the other boy, who bursted laughing.
" You are so mean, Sagacchi! "
Saga laughed even harder. Shou was always like that, innoscent and kind, sensitive. He could easily cry but he was allways there for his friends. So, Saga had promissed to himself that he wouldprotect him forever. He went closer to Shou, grabbing his wrist gently.
" Come on, Shou-chan. Let's go play again... Where's your brother again? "
Shou wanted to be strict at the other boy, but Saga's joyfull smile had softened him before he even notice it. He followed him bouncing happily, squizing Saga's thin hand tightly...
"Oh, ignore him, he is mean too! He refused to join us! "
That was an image Shou treasured for the next years and kept it deep in his heart. It was the same image that ghosted his mind six years later, at his sexteen, when he lost something irreplaceable. Saga was right, angels don't exist. If they existed, Saga would be by his side the next year too, and the next, and the next. He wouldn't be hit by that car on the street, he wouldn't be on a coma for weeks... He wouldn't die... After that, he putted all of his beliefs about guardian angels in a small box and locked it somewhere deep in his heart, hoping that one day he would forget about it forever. He kept only the good memories he had with him, their freely playing around outside, the jokes they were playing Shou's brother for being so snobbish, when they were studying for tests and Saga was allways coppying from him... When he discovered jealousy for the first time, the time that he finaly comfessed to the boy with the wild heart, their first kiss... He wanted to smile when thinking about Saga, and surely Saga would want the same from him. But it din't last long. All those memories he buried, all the nightmares he forgot he once had, awakened one year after Saga's death...
* * *
" Please please please please please... Hear me.. "
For straight eight hours he stood there. He didn't move even an inch. The nurses tried to take him out of the room only to discover how mad Shou could become when in rage. After a lot of angry shouts and screams, doctors let him be and he stayed there loyally. He didn't eat, didn't sleep. He even refused to go to the toilet untill he knew everything would be fine. Closing his ears, he shouted loudly to himself the song Hiroto liked so much. He did everything to ignore the doctors and his parents talking. They knew nothing! Hiroto wouldn't leave him, he would be fine... Fine...
Leaning his head to his youngrer brother's lap, he took a frail hand and kissed it genlty, keeping it warm. Hiroto would wake up soon, his hands should be warm. He kissed Hiroto's cold forehead desperately, hot tears streaming down his cheek, falling on his brothers lips.
" Critical condition... No... No! They are lying! Pon, please, wake up! " His hands cupped the ivory face, moving it softly. " Wake up, Pon, please... Don't leave me too..."
Angels didn't exist, he learned that in the hard way. He had no hope, no miracle to believe in, he had nothing. He was feeling alone in this cruel world. His whispers and pleads where sounding inside the room, along with their mother's cries. Hiroto's weak heart was beating slowly, not like healthy people's hearts, but at least it was something that was keeping Shou's sanity. Lying close to his brother's bed, Shou closed his eyes slowly. The rythm was steady, perfect for a sweet lullaby, to keep nightmares away... For just a tiny bit at least...
The calm beating fastened. Shou's lullaby turned into a nasty nightmare as the fragille body beside him started to spasm violently. Shou jumped up, he was shaking from fear as he tried to calm Hiroto's body down.
" A doctor! Now! " His cries were painfull as he embracedhis younger brother protectively. Pleads, curses and prays were projected in his mind, asking angels, demons, God himself for help. Breathing on the same rythm as Hiroto's heartbeat, Shou felt loss of oxygen in his lungs. His body started to feel numb, but he didn't care.
" Pon, please... Wake up for me Pon, to see you again... You can fight it Pon! Please, fight it! "
Tears froze on his cheek when the heartbeating became a united tone, piercing Shou's ears and heart.
" No.. No! NO! "
Nurses came to give him injections so tjat he would calm down, but he drove them off. By that time the doctor came, finding the boy on his knees, his once beautyfull eyes red amd tired, wide from fear. He jumped up, grabbing the doctor by his robe.
" Please do something! " He pleaded with voice broke from the sobs. " You can do something about him, right? RIGHT? "
The doctor pushed him off softly and checked the other boy. He shooked his head regretfully. His lips tightened as he glanced at his watch.
" Time of death, two a.m. "
Shou lost his ability to breathe and move, as he plopped on his knees on the floor. He shooked his head in denial, all that was a lie, a joke. A tasteless joke... Shou's pleading screams pierced the walls. He was heared in the other side of the hospital as he spent tears of loss for the second time in his life. He ran on the bed, embracing the precious body with love, all the love Hiroto denied from him so many years...
" Bring him back... " he whispered "I lost Saga, now Pon too... I can't stand it... " He looked maddly at the ceiling. " Whatever lives up there, please, give him back... Stop taking everyone i love away!!! "
It took some momments, only some mere momments. The annoying sound stopped completely. Shou couldn't understand why, but he grabbed Hiroto tighter. And then a strong spasm lifftd him up,along with Hiroto, as the latter took a large amount of oxygen in his lungs. Beeping started again, rapid at first but it got calmer as time passed. Tears covered Sou's eyes again, but this time their taste was sweet, for those tears were of happiness. Hiroto was there, alive.
" Omg! " he whispered, and then jumped to him, hugging him tight, afraid of losing him again. " Oh, Pon, you scared me so much! "
Hiroto didn't answer back. He looked shocked, surprised infront his older brother. He moved byt the bed's corner, getting away from Shou's grip.
" Pon, what's wrong? "
Hiroto reacted in Shou's full of worry tone. He touched his face everywhere, he ran a hand through his hair and examined his thin hands. Hiroto was terrified.
" Don't worry Pon, you were hurt in an accident but everything will be fine now... "
Shou leaned to touch Hiroto's shoulder encouragingly, but the boy shrugged again. His eyes widened, as if he saw some kind of ghost.
" Pon? " Shou wore a hurt expretion. " Are you... afraid of me? "
Before Hiroto could even react, their parents barged in the room, running on to him and hugging him. Shou hasitated at first, but then he went closer too. It was a happy momment for all of them...
But Hiroto didn't seem like that. All those faces and touches were scaring him, he couldn't react or scape. He was sad, really sad. And when his eyes met Shou, tears of regret ran on his face.
" Oh god " he whispered, low enough not to be heared " what have i done?... "
* * * * *
So, this is the prologue of my first multichapter... I wrote that 2 weeks ago but i wanted to make sure about what to do with it... So here it is,and i hope you'll like it :)
One more thing...This is going to get tricky! xD And... about he char death...Don't hit me hard please!!! :/ Remeber that Saga is my LOVE and we'll see what happens next... Comments are appreciated :3
Chapters: Prologue
Author: fallen_am_i
Genre: Romance, Dramma,angst (?),some fluff maybe,some supernatural stuff
Warnings: No beta,incest,MxM relationgship. For this chapter : mention of character's death T-T
Rating: PG-13 for now
Pairing: Shou x Hiroto,Saga x Shou (just a mention), more to come
Synopsis: We all have many duties... There are some that have only one, that's their meaning in life. what happens when one of them does a terrible mistake?When he has to pay for that?
Disclaimer: I own the story only...
" Hey, Sagacchi... "
" Hmmm? "
" Do you believe in angels? "
They were outside, in Shou's garden. It was the first snow of the year, so beautyfull and white... The boys couldn't just stay in the house...They both loved snow so much, so they decided to enjoy it as much as they could. After an hour running around and shouting in mere happiness,and a lot of snowballs falling into their faces, they lied down on on the soft, yet cold ground.
" What are you talking about Shou - chan? " The small boy beside him clenched his fists. " We are ten now, we are not children to belive in such silly things! "
" Oh realy? " The taller boy with the wide eyes blushed, his cheek now coloured even redder than they were before because of the cold. " Then why did you make one with the snow? "
A hand with red gloves showed boldly the snow around Saga's hands and legs. It formed a figure with green - brown, due to the ground, wings.
" Ah, that.. " It was Saga's turn to blush. He turned his head away from Shou, his eyes now fixed on a large snowman who was tilting on the left - Saga insisted it needed more snow there and Shou couldn't dissagree with his bossy friend. " It just felt fun. "
Shou rolled his eyes. Saga was allways like that since he turned ten. He stopped believing in Santa, witches, magical creatures, generaly anything that helped imagination to stay alive. He kept saying he was a man now, and men don't cry, no believe in fairytales. Well, according to Shou, Saga was just an idiot doing so, but he couldn't do anything about the other's strong wil. So he kept dreaming away and imagining for both of them.
" Well, i belive in them, Saga! "
" No wonder... "
" Shut up! " Shou jumped up and moved his hyper self close to Saga. " My mom says they exist and i believe her! She told me yesterday that everyone in this world " he raised his hands in a big,open embrace towards the sky to show he was serious, " has an angel of his own, who guards him and takes care of him! "
He let a wide grin on his cute face and his imagination to travel far away in the sky, where some angels -his angel too, along with Saga's one- were looking at earth, for the people they were protecting. They were so beautyfull in Shou's mind, radiand, and wise, and -
" You are such a baby, Shou... " Saga shooked his head in desperation. " Grow up! Such things don't exist! "
" They do! " Shou stood up, now vissily angry with his friend. His face had the same red colour as his gloves, or even redder, and Saga could swear he saw smoke comming out of Shou's ears. " They keep us alive and healthy! "
" Oh? " Saga took his i-am-smarter-than-you-look, raising a brow on the other boy. He had a brilliant though. " Then why do people die? "
Shou though about it a bit, furrowing his brows as he unconsioussly rubbed his chin.
" Ummm, I guess when people grow old, angels take them to the sky, to keep them company... "
" No! Not the granies and grampas! " Saga rubbed his temple, losing his patience. " Why do young people die Shou? Kids, like you and me? "
Shou put his brain at work. He wanted to answer back at Saga, to show him that he was mistaken this time. But he found no answer, not one he liked at least.
" Well? " Saga crossed his arms, pressuring Shou to give an answer. Victory was mirrored insidehis eyes, he knew Shou couldn't say something smart again.
The taller boy entwined his fingers behind his back. He used to do that when he felt cornered.
" I-I don't know yet... "
" Ha! " Saga laughed, pointing his index finger at him. " Either they don't do their job right those... angels of yours, or... they just don't exist! Admitt it! "
Shou pouted. He hated when Saga won over something he liked. He was so proud of himself and many other things that were making Shou angry. He turned his back to the other boy, who bursted laughing.
" You are so mean, Sagacchi! "
Saga laughed even harder. Shou was always like that, innoscent and kind, sensitive. He could easily cry but he was allways there for his friends. So, Saga had promissed to himself that he wouldprotect him forever. He went closer to Shou, grabbing his wrist gently.
" Come on, Shou-chan. Let's go play again... Where's your brother again? "
Shou wanted to be strict at the other boy, but Saga's joyfull smile had softened him before he even notice it. He followed him bouncing happily, squizing Saga's thin hand tightly...
"Oh, ignore him, he is mean too! He refused to join us! "
That was an image Shou treasured for the next years and kept it deep in his heart. It was the same image that ghosted his mind six years later, at his sexteen, when he lost something irreplaceable. Saga was right, angels don't exist. If they existed, Saga would be by his side the next year too, and the next, and the next. He wouldn't be hit by that car on the street, he wouldn't be on a coma for weeks... He wouldn't die... After that, he putted all of his beliefs about guardian angels in a small box and locked it somewhere deep in his heart, hoping that one day he would forget about it forever. He kept only the good memories he had with him, their freely playing around outside, the jokes they were playing Shou's brother for being so snobbish, when they were studying for tests and Saga was allways coppying from him... When he discovered jealousy for the first time, the time that he finaly comfessed to the boy with the wild heart, their first kiss... He wanted to smile when thinking about Saga, and surely Saga would want the same from him. But it din't last long. All those memories he buried, all the nightmares he forgot he once had, awakened one year after Saga's death...
* * *
" Please please please please please... Hear me.. "
For straight eight hours he stood there. He didn't move even an inch. The nurses tried to take him out of the room only to discover how mad Shou could become when in rage. After a lot of angry shouts and screams, doctors let him be and he stayed there loyally. He didn't eat, didn't sleep. He even refused to go to the toilet untill he knew everything would be fine. Closing his ears, he shouted loudly to himself the song Hiroto liked so much. He did everything to ignore the doctors and his parents talking. They knew nothing! Hiroto wouldn't leave him, he would be fine... Fine...
Leaning his head to his youngrer brother's lap, he took a frail hand and kissed it genlty, keeping it warm. Hiroto would wake up soon, his hands should be warm. He kissed Hiroto's cold forehead desperately, hot tears streaming down his cheek, falling on his brothers lips.
" Critical condition... No... No! They are lying! Pon, please, wake up! " His hands cupped the ivory face, moving it softly. " Wake up, Pon, please... Don't leave me too..."
Angels didn't exist, he learned that in the hard way. He had no hope, no miracle to believe in, he had nothing. He was feeling alone in this cruel world. His whispers and pleads where sounding inside the room, along with their mother's cries. Hiroto's weak heart was beating slowly, not like healthy people's hearts, but at least it was something that was keeping Shou's sanity. Lying close to his brother's bed, Shou closed his eyes slowly. The rythm was steady, perfect for a sweet lullaby, to keep nightmares away... For just a tiny bit at least...
The calm beating fastened. Shou's lullaby turned into a nasty nightmare as the fragille body beside him started to spasm violently. Shou jumped up, he was shaking from fear as he tried to calm Hiroto's body down.
" A doctor! Now! " His cries were painfull as he embracedhis younger brother protectively. Pleads, curses and prays were projected in his mind, asking angels, demons, God himself for help. Breathing on the same rythm as Hiroto's heartbeat, Shou felt loss of oxygen in his lungs. His body started to feel numb, but he didn't care.
" Pon, please... Wake up for me Pon, to see you again... You can fight it Pon! Please, fight it! "
Tears froze on his cheek when the heartbeating became a united tone, piercing Shou's ears and heart.
" No.. No! NO! "
Nurses came to give him injections so tjat he would calm down, but he drove them off. By that time the doctor came, finding the boy on his knees, his once beautyfull eyes red amd tired, wide from fear. He jumped up, grabbing the doctor by his robe.
" Please do something! " He pleaded with voice broke from the sobs. " You can do something about him, right? RIGHT? "
The doctor pushed him off softly and checked the other boy. He shooked his head regretfully. His lips tightened as he glanced at his watch.
" Time of death, two a.m. "
Shou lost his ability to breathe and move, as he plopped on his knees on the floor. He shooked his head in denial, all that was a lie, a joke. A tasteless joke... Shou's pleading screams pierced the walls. He was heared in the other side of the hospital as he spent tears of loss for the second time in his life. He ran on the bed, embracing the precious body with love, all the love Hiroto denied from him so many years...
" Bring him back... " he whispered "I lost Saga, now Pon too... I can't stand it... " He looked maddly at the ceiling. " Whatever lives up there, please, give him back... Stop taking everyone i love away!!! "
It took some momments, only some mere momments. The annoying sound stopped completely. Shou couldn't understand why, but he grabbed Hiroto tighter. And then a strong spasm lifftd him up,along with Hiroto, as the latter took a large amount of oxygen in his lungs. Beeping started again, rapid at first but it got calmer as time passed. Tears covered Sou's eyes again, but this time their taste was sweet, for those tears were of happiness. Hiroto was there, alive.
" Omg! " he whispered, and then jumped to him, hugging him tight, afraid of losing him again. " Oh, Pon, you scared me so much! "
Hiroto didn't answer back. He looked shocked, surprised infront his older brother. He moved byt the bed's corner, getting away from Shou's grip.
" Pon, what's wrong? "
Hiroto reacted in Shou's full of worry tone. He touched his face everywhere, he ran a hand through his hair and examined his thin hands. Hiroto was terrified.
" Don't worry Pon, you were hurt in an accident but everything will be fine now... "
Shou leaned to touch Hiroto's shoulder encouragingly, but the boy shrugged again. His eyes widened, as if he saw some kind of ghost.
" Pon? " Shou wore a hurt expretion. " Are you... afraid of me? "
Before Hiroto could even react, their parents barged in the room, running on to him and hugging him. Shou hasitated at first, but then he went closer too. It was a happy momment for all of them...
But Hiroto didn't seem like that. All those faces and touches were scaring him, he couldn't react or scape. He was sad, really sad. And when his eyes met Shou, tears of regret ran on his face.
" Oh god " he whispered, low enough not to be heared " what have i done?... "
* * * * *
So, this is the prologue of my first multichapter... I wrote that 2 weeks ago but i wanted to make sure about what to do with it... So here it is,and i hope you'll like it :)
One more thing...This is going to get tricky! xD And... about he char death...Don't hit me hard please!!! :/ Remeber that Saga is my LOVE and we'll see what happens next... Comments are appreciated :3