What you do to me
So, I'm sitting here and someone near and dear to me was here and gone as quickly as he came. He'll be back eventually; but for now he's once again a thousand miles away. And it as usual has me thinking. It's about 2:20 right now, and my mind is running a marathon keeping me awake at night again. On top of that I have a major sunburn on the back of my neck and covering both of my arms; so not only am I sitting here lost in my own thoughts, I'm also in some serious pain. And that brings us to the topic of the evening.
It's an interesting thought to be honest. Our own minds are some of our worst enemies. We sit, lost in our thoughts. They tend to flow along the lines of love, money, life in general, and of course to our thoughts about those very close to us. These thoughts may always start as happy moments forever etched into our memories. But they quickly turn to the what if's, and that's where we fail to stop ourselves. From that point a downward spiral occurs, rushing us into a pool of thoughts that nearly always are without reason totally negative. We wonder if people are doing okay, and if we will ever see them again. We sit in our idle state staring off into open space, and realize that we know nothing about the what if's, and it's those if's that we worry so about. They toss into our common streams of thoughts concerns about how things could have been, or perhaps will be. We then lose memory and also our grasp on the present. We all do it, and if you say you don't then you're clearly a liar or a hopeless optimist. And if the latter is the case, please stop reading as I am hopelessly negative, and only deal in the realms of our deepest and often darkest thoughts.
Anyway, these thoughts come together and in the end make us wonder what after the if's have past; we could have done or could do, to exact the changes we have seen in our thoughts; or in many cases again...avoid them. But we cannot change the past, no matter how much that might hurt. We also cannot determine the future. We can pilot our own actions to the course we seek, however those of others we can only make speculations about. So you can never truly determine an outcome when it does not involve only yourself. And nothing in this world involves a single person. Yes, I'm sorry; you are not the center of all reality. So the thoughts continue, they tumble about with no fences to hold them in place; and once they reach their apex we become given manifest their darkest parts in our physical realm. Often times, this is depression, sometimes anxiety. At any rate, it's a change we did not desire; and though it may be temporary the more we give it focus the more it will show it's signs to us.
The point of all this? Next time you're having your thoughts wander aimlessly; write them down. Look at them when you're not alone in the dark; and maybe you'll realize just how silly your outrageous ideas are. Of course...if you're crazy you might not. But hell, we're all crazy to some degree. Don't let it rule your life, or the things you want might just get further and further away.
-Aloha =)
It's an interesting thought to be honest. Our own minds are some of our worst enemies. We sit, lost in our thoughts. They tend to flow along the lines of love, money, life in general, and of course to our thoughts about those very close to us. These thoughts may always start as happy moments forever etched into our memories. But they quickly turn to the what if's, and that's where we fail to stop ourselves. From that point a downward spiral occurs, rushing us into a pool of thoughts that nearly always are without reason totally negative. We wonder if people are doing okay, and if we will ever see them again. We sit in our idle state staring off into open space, and realize that we know nothing about the what if's, and it's those if's that we worry so about. They toss into our common streams of thoughts concerns about how things could have been, or perhaps will be. We then lose memory and also our grasp on the present. We all do it, and if you say you don't then you're clearly a liar or a hopeless optimist. And if the latter is the case, please stop reading as I am hopelessly negative, and only deal in the realms of our deepest and often darkest thoughts.
Anyway, these thoughts come together and in the end make us wonder what after the if's have past; we could have done or could do, to exact the changes we have seen in our thoughts; or in many cases again...avoid them. But we cannot change the past, no matter how much that might hurt. We also cannot determine the future. We can pilot our own actions to the course we seek, however those of others we can only make speculations about. So you can never truly determine an outcome when it does not involve only yourself. And nothing in this world involves a single person. Yes, I'm sorry; you are not the center of all reality. So the thoughts continue, they tumble about with no fences to hold them in place; and once they reach their apex we become given manifest their darkest parts in our physical realm. Often times, this is depression, sometimes anxiety. At any rate, it's a change we did not desire; and though it may be temporary the more we give it focus the more it will show it's signs to us.
The point of all this? Next time you're having your thoughts wander aimlessly; write them down. Look at them when you're not alone in the dark; and maybe you'll realize just how silly your outrageous ideas are. Of course...if you're crazy you might not. But hell, we're all crazy to some degree. Don't let it rule your life, or the things you want might just get further and further away.
-Aloha =)