In your eyes, part 1
Title: In Your Eyes (1/?)
author : colbchella
pairings: Jon/Stephen
rating: R for language
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
I'm walking over to his office to give him the best news I can possibly give him. No words can explain how unbelievably proud and happy I am for him, but a part of me feels sad to the fact that things won't be the same anymore.That made me feel guilty as hell and I keep telling myself that I was being stupid, which I knew I really was.
As I approached his office I just invited myself in, we stopped knocking a long time ago.
There he was, my best friend, Stephen Colbert, crouched on his desk and working on his piece for tonight's show.
As I approached his desk I couldn't help but give a sad smile, but I quickly snapped out of it.
Stephen heard my footsteps and lifted his head up; as soon as he saw that it was me he shot me one those killer smiles of his, "What's up Jonny Stew?"
I grinned at one of the many nicknames he came up with for me.
"Umm, we gotta talk. You got a second?"
Stephen looked worried all of a sudden, "Yeah of course, what's up?"
"Jeez you don’t have to look so grim. What am I, the bearer of bad news?"
Stephen laughed. "Well you were the one who told me firefly got cancelled. But seriously, you've got a funny look on your face that I can't quite read."
"Didn’t know you were a mind reader", I said
"It is one of my many skills, but you know me I don’t like to boast, especially when I'm around insecure people." Stephen smirked.
"You calling me insecure?" I asked.
"Did I say you? You think everything is about you don't you, Stewart? Hate to be the "bearer of bad news" here, but it's not. You're just not that interesting." Stephen kept his face straight, waiting for me to break first. And as usual I was the one to break first. I giggled and looked at him as his straight face was replaced by a satisfied smile.
"Mission accomplished," he said, as he always did whenever he got me to break first.
"Yeah so, back to our main subject, brace yourself. You ready, Colbert?"
"Pshtt, I was born ready, Stewart."
I laughed. "Asshole, stop getting into character when you don’t have to be. You really are unbelievable."
Stephen laughed, "Sorry, he gets in my head sometimes you know. So spill the beans Stewbug."
I looked straight at him and gave him the biggest smile, "We’re giving you your own show."
Stephen turned his head to favor his left side, obviously thinking that he didn’t hear that right."Come again?"
"We're giving you your own show."
Stephen's face was blank. "Are you serious?"
"Yeah, Ben and I pitched the idea to the network and they loved it.They're giving you the eleven thirty timeslot." Something weird was happening to Stephen's face. It was as if he was trying to smile but is overcome with shock, so he had this weird twitch going on. I kept grinning like an idiot. "Are you having a seizure? Say something."
"Jon, I… I don’t know what to say. Are you fucking serious?"
He looked at me as if I was going to break, waiting to just let him on the joke, a very cruel joke I might add.
I walked over to his side of the desk and put my hand on his shoulder. I looked him straight into his eyes and said, "Yeah, I'm fucking serious. It's yours if you want it. I'm really proud of you, Stephen."
Stephen started grinning like an idiot, matching my idiotic grin. He put his hands in his hair and the look on his face was priceless. It's like he couldn’t believe it. And soon enough he said it, he stood up, "Jon, I can't believe this. Holy shi… this is fucking awesome. Ha! Fucking unbelievable! I'm gonna have my own show?!"
"You're gonna have your own show!"
Just then Stephen hugged me; he wrapped his arms around me and held me close. I clapped my hand on his back. I was never a very touchy guy, but Stephen was, and he never made me feel uncomfortable. On the contrary, it always felt nice and I couldn't help but return the gestures.
"I'm so proud of you, buddy. You deserve this. You've worked your ass off all these years and you finally got what you deserve."
Stephen pulled away from me, tears of joy forming in his eyes, smiling his ass off. He couldn't stop smiling. Usually whenever Stephen got excited he'd be jumping off the walls and driving us all crazy. But I can see it on his face that this news was that big that it just left him weak, ridden with shock mostly, he couldn't do anything but smile hysterically. I watched him closely as I saw him slowly snapping back to reality.
"Jon, thank you. You really didn’t have to do this to me."
"Shut up. You really do deserve this. Everyone thinks so. As soon as we pitched the idea to the network they were ecstatic about it. I didn’t even have to talk much. They Okayed it on the spot. This is your big break, man. And you're gonna kill it."
"Jon… I… holy shit… my own show…"
I never got to see a speechless Stephen. It was adorable. "I didn’t know anything could shut you up. I should've told you this a long time ago whenever you drove us crazy with your lord of the rings shit."
"How long have you known about this?"
"About a week or so give or take. But I just got the official news now. You're gonna start in October, so we've got a good couple of months to plan this right. I'm the executive producer by the way, so I'm still your boss. I just wanted to make that clear so you still need to kiss my ass," I joked. "As soon as I heard I headed right over here."
"Sneaky bastard, didn't know you could keep a secret."
"Didn't know that when you said you had mind reading skills, you forgot to mention the part where you say that you lack it."
"That's what my character said Jon, not me."
"Stop using your character as a defense mechanism. It's no fun." I pouted.
Stephen laughed and hugged me again."I really don’t know how to thank you, Jon. I owe you everything."
I couldn’t help but smile. I pulled back from him. "Don't be ridiculous. I didn't do anything. Like I said, you deserve it. Just don’t screw it up."
"I won't."
"I know."
***
Later that night, the correspondents and I went to the usual bar next to work to celebrate Stephen's big news. Everyone was pretty much getting wasted and just enjoying themselves. I was standing by the bar waiting for our next round of drinks and I was staring at our table.
Everyone was happy, but Stephen was absolutely glowing. Samantha Bee was drunk off her ass and was trying to strip, but Rob Corddry stopped her. Steve Carell and Ed Helms were singing something to Stephen which I couldn't quite catch over the noise of the crowded
bar. As soon as they were done they both hugged Stephen, sandwiching him in between. Stephen pretended to wipe back a tear and I could see them all laughing. I couldn’t help but smile myself.
What will happen after Stephen's gone? Over the past couple of years, Stephen and I became best friends. We just understood each other so well, we bounced ideas off of each other, and Stephen was the only one who could make me feel better whenever I got so frustrated over work. I'm gonna miss all those late night writing sessions, eating Chinese food, and yeah as much as I hate admitting it, the tickle fighting.
But I know I can't be selfish about this. I have to be happy for him, I am happy for him. He doesn’t think he deserves his own show, but I know better, and he's gonna be amazing at it. But thinking about not being around Stephen all day long was not something I was looking forward to.
I kept staring at Stephen all the way across the bar. Whenever he smiled or laughed I felt myself smiling with him. There was something about Stephen and that charisma of his. He can always brighten up the room just by walking into it. He radiated that type of positivity and happiness whenever I was around him. Stephen looked up and saw me staring at him. He just smiled at me and I smiled back.
"If you guys don’t go and do it already you're gonna kill me"
Samantha Bee was standing next to me. I didn’t realize her walking away from the table and heading over me.
"I'm sorry?"
"You heard me, Stewart. It's about time you go and tell him how you really feel."
"And what's that, Sam?"
She rolled her eyes at me. "That you're in love with him."
I looked at her with surprise. I laughed at her stupid comment. "You are drunk off your ass, Sam."
"Oh please, just look at yourself right now. Staring at him with that love struck expression on your face. You're in love, dumbass."
"I am not in love with him, Sam. Stephen's my best friend. He's like a brother to me. He's the closest one I have in my life, but I'm not in love with him. Those gay innuendos were just for laughs, you know that. I'm not gay, and neither is Stephen."
"You're gay for Stephen."
"That doesn’t make sense."
"If you see how you guys look when you look at each other, it'll make sense. And I know Stephen feels the same way too you know."
"He does?"
"Ofcourse he does! But you two can't get it through your thick skulls. Man up Stewart and go make a move!"
Before I can tell her how absolutely insane she sounds, Steve was right up my face. "Would you girls stop your chit chat and get the drinks?"
I looked around and saw that our drinks were indeed ready. Steve helped me with the drinks as we headed towards our table. As soon as the rest of the group saw us coming they cheered. The only empty chair was the one next to Stephen. I looked at Stephen and he was smiling at me. I smiled back but quickly looked away. All of a sudden I felt uncomfortable. What Sam was saying really stuck in my head but it was insane. I'm not in love with Stephen. I can't be. We're just really good friends. If I knew that Sam was talking out of her ass, then why did it get to me that much?
"I wanna give a toast to our man, Stephen Colbert!" Steve spoke up and snapped be back to reality. "Stephen, we worked together in Second City, I was kind of your mentor back then, and you looked up to me. You were so eager to learn and I can't blame you for it, I really was the king of improv. I was talented, sexy, and funny and everyone wanted to fuck me."
"You sure you weren't high on something back then, Steve? Who'd wanna fuck you?" Rob interrupted him. We all laughed.
"You're just jealous because I turned you down the first time we met, Corddry." Steve retorted.
"Oooooohhh!" We all yelled back. Rob was just about to say something, but Steve just continued on with his speech.
"As I was saying, I was amazing and everyone wanted to fuck me. I'm just that irresistible. Anyhow, Stephen, when I saw you work I knew you were gonna be the next Steve Carell. And I was okay with that. I knew I was destined for something bigger and better. I was gonna become a movie star. And when I do, I couldn’t ask for anyone better to take my place than you."
"I'm flattered, Steve." Stephen said.
"And then to my surprise we both landed a gig on the daily show. I was so happy to work with you again that I put my dreams of becoming a movie star on hold."
"Oh, Stevie you didn’t have to." Stephen said sarcastically. The rest of us laughed.
"No, it's okay. I wanted to. I thought this was a sign that you still needed me, and I was just honored. You looked up to me and you didn't wanna let me go! You were like that grown man who still lives with his parents. But now, you son of a bitch, you're leaving me!" Steve pretended to weep."You're leaving meee!"
We just couldn’t take it anymore. We all laughed, except for Steve, he really was the only one who can hold up his act for so long.
"How dare you? You think you're better than me? You just go up and leave? I sacrificed my career for you!" Steve was still ranting on and we were still laughing our asses off, wiping off tears of laughter. "So I raise my glass to Stephen, you have grown out of the cocoon, you may fly away now, and meet the other butterflies in the world, but I will hunt you down again, and tell your butterfly friends that you're a backstabber and you're just gonna leave them when you find someone better. I love you, man. To Stephen"
We all raised our glasses, still laughing "To Stephen."
Stephen was actually tearing up, and Steve hugged him. When he pulled away he ruffled Stephen's hair. "I know it's still gonna be a couple of months since you actually leave, but we're really gonna miss you, buddy."
"I'm gonna miss you guys too. Now I can't top Steve's speech but I do wanna say something. You have no idea how much all of you guys mean to me. For the past couple of years you've all been like family. I have no one here in New York besides you guys. Thank you for all your support and for everything you did for me all these years. I know it's difficult to pretend to enjoy me ranting about my lord of the rings obsessions, so I guess that’s why you never really tried to humor me, even though I sit and listen about you guys complaining about everything. But I especially really wanna thank Jon."
Stephen put his arm around me and I just wished that it was dark enough for them not to see me blush a bit. I knew Sam was trying to catch my eye but I didn't want to. I felt uncomfortable again and just stared at the ground.
"Um Stephen, I told you before you don’t have to thank me." I really wished he didn't. I never liked the attention I got.
"Oh, Jonny boy, you're always so modest. But I just wanted to say that if it weren't for Jon, I wouldn't have gotten this. I learned a lot from you and it is all because of you. Sorry Steve."
Everyone laughed and I giggled. Steve said something but I was too distracted with Stephen's arm around me, Stephen being so close to me, damn you Sam.
"So, thank you. And I'm gonna thank you every day until you finally change your mind and know that all this happened because of you, to Jon."
"To Jon!" Everyone cheered. Stephen drew me closer and planted a kiss on my check. I tried to look up for a moment and met Sam's eyes. She was clearly giving me the I-told-you-so look. I couldn't take all this pressure that sprung upon me. As I wanted to stand up and make an excuse to get out of there, Ed stood up "Let's get this fucking party started! Shots!"
Everyone cheered. I stood up and Stephen withdrew his arm from me. He gave me a confused look. I stared at those big brown eyes of his and at that moment everything changed for me. I had this sudden urge to jump on him and kiss the life out of him. Maybe it was just the booze talking, but I knew I had to get out of there.
"I have to go. I don’t feel so good."
Everyone started protesting and I heard someone booing but I couldn’t concentrate on anyone besides Stephen. What the fuck, Jon? Get it together. I didn’t know if I was being paranoid but I saw something in Stephen's eyes too. As if some realization dawned upon us all of a sudden. He didn’t say anything. As I said goodbye to the group, they all protested, but I didn’t care. I was too distracted and I heard Sam telling them to let me go.
I walked out of the bar and I tried to relax. What the fuck happened back there? I can blame it on the booze but I know I didn’t drink that much. I can blame it on Sam but that still didn’t make sense why all of a sudden I wanted to jump Stephen's bones.
I started walking; maybe a walk could clear my head a bit. I walked into the alleyway and stopped. Christ, I could really use a cigarette now. I turned around to buy a pack from across the street, and suddenly stopped.
That's when I saw him, Stephen. Fuck me, something horrible is gonna happen. I'm gonna do something that I'll regret for the rest of my life, I can feel it.
author : colbchella
pairings: Jon/Stephen
rating: R for language
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
I'm walking over to his office to give him the best news I can possibly give him. No words can explain how unbelievably proud and happy I am for him, but a part of me feels sad to the fact that things won't be the same anymore.That made me feel guilty as hell and I keep telling myself that I was being stupid, which I knew I really was.
As I approached his office I just invited myself in, we stopped knocking a long time ago.
There he was, my best friend, Stephen Colbert, crouched on his desk and working on his piece for tonight's show.
As I approached his desk I couldn't help but give a sad smile, but I quickly snapped out of it.
Stephen heard my footsteps and lifted his head up; as soon as he saw that it was me he shot me one those killer smiles of his, "What's up Jonny Stew?"
I grinned at one of the many nicknames he came up with for me.
"Umm, we gotta talk. You got a second?"
Stephen looked worried all of a sudden, "Yeah of course, what's up?"
"Jeez you don’t have to look so grim. What am I, the bearer of bad news?"
Stephen laughed. "Well you were the one who told me firefly got cancelled. But seriously, you've got a funny look on your face that I can't quite read."
"Didn’t know you were a mind reader", I said
"It is one of my many skills, but you know me I don’t like to boast, especially when I'm around insecure people." Stephen smirked.
"You calling me insecure?" I asked.
"Did I say you? You think everything is about you don't you, Stewart? Hate to be the "bearer of bad news" here, but it's not. You're just not that interesting." Stephen kept his face straight, waiting for me to break first. And as usual I was the one to break first. I giggled and looked at him as his straight face was replaced by a satisfied smile.
"Mission accomplished," he said, as he always did whenever he got me to break first.
"Yeah so, back to our main subject, brace yourself. You ready, Colbert?"
"Pshtt, I was born ready, Stewart."
I laughed. "Asshole, stop getting into character when you don’t have to be. You really are unbelievable."
Stephen laughed, "Sorry, he gets in my head sometimes you know. So spill the beans Stewbug."
I looked straight at him and gave him the biggest smile, "We’re giving you your own show."
Stephen turned his head to favor his left side, obviously thinking that he didn’t hear that right."Come again?"
"We're giving you your own show."
Stephen's face was blank. "Are you serious?"
"Yeah, Ben and I pitched the idea to the network and they loved it.They're giving you the eleven thirty timeslot." Something weird was happening to Stephen's face. It was as if he was trying to smile but is overcome with shock, so he had this weird twitch going on. I kept grinning like an idiot. "Are you having a seizure? Say something."
"Jon, I… I don’t know what to say. Are you fucking serious?"
He looked at me as if I was going to break, waiting to just let him on the joke, a very cruel joke I might add.
I walked over to his side of the desk and put my hand on his shoulder. I looked him straight into his eyes and said, "Yeah, I'm fucking serious. It's yours if you want it. I'm really proud of you, Stephen."
Stephen started grinning like an idiot, matching my idiotic grin. He put his hands in his hair and the look on his face was priceless. It's like he couldn’t believe it. And soon enough he said it, he stood up, "Jon, I can't believe this. Holy shi… this is fucking awesome. Ha! Fucking unbelievable! I'm gonna have my own show?!"
"You're gonna have your own show!"
Just then Stephen hugged me; he wrapped his arms around me and held me close. I clapped my hand on his back. I was never a very touchy guy, but Stephen was, and he never made me feel uncomfortable. On the contrary, it always felt nice and I couldn't help but return the gestures.
"I'm so proud of you, buddy. You deserve this. You've worked your ass off all these years and you finally got what you deserve."
Stephen pulled away from me, tears of joy forming in his eyes, smiling his ass off. He couldn't stop smiling. Usually whenever Stephen got excited he'd be jumping off the walls and driving us all crazy. But I can see it on his face that this news was that big that it just left him weak, ridden with shock mostly, he couldn't do anything but smile hysterically. I watched him closely as I saw him slowly snapping back to reality.
"Jon, thank you. You really didn’t have to do this to me."
"Shut up. You really do deserve this. Everyone thinks so. As soon as we pitched the idea to the network they were ecstatic about it. I didn’t even have to talk much. They Okayed it on the spot. This is your big break, man. And you're gonna kill it."
"Jon… I… holy shit… my own show…"
I never got to see a speechless Stephen. It was adorable. "I didn’t know anything could shut you up. I should've told you this a long time ago whenever you drove us crazy with your lord of the rings shit."
"How long have you known about this?"
"About a week or so give or take. But I just got the official news now. You're gonna start in October, so we've got a good couple of months to plan this right. I'm the executive producer by the way, so I'm still your boss. I just wanted to make that clear so you still need to kiss my ass," I joked. "As soon as I heard I headed right over here."
"Sneaky bastard, didn't know you could keep a secret."
"Didn't know that when you said you had mind reading skills, you forgot to mention the part where you say that you lack it."
"That's what my character said Jon, not me."
"Stop using your character as a defense mechanism. It's no fun." I pouted.
Stephen laughed and hugged me again."I really don’t know how to thank you, Jon. I owe you everything."
I couldn’t help but smile. I pulled back from him. "Don't be ridiculous. I didn't do anything. Like I said, you deserve it. Just don’t screw it up."
"I won't."
"I know."
***
Later that night, the correspondents and I went to the usual bar next to work to celebrate Stephen's big news. Everyone was pretty much getting wasted and just enjoying themselves. I was standing by the bar waiting for our next round of drinks and I was staring at our table.
Everyone was happy, but Stephen was absolutely glowing. Samantha Bee was drunk off her ass and was trying to strip, but Rob Corddry stopped her. Steve Carell and Ed Helms were singing something to Stephen which I couldn't quite catch over the noise of the crowded
bar. As soon as they were done they both hugged Stephen, sandwiching him in between. Stephen pretended to wipe back a tear and I could see them all laughing. I couldn’t help but smile myself.
What will happen after Stephen's gone? Over the past couple of years, Stephen and I became best friends. We just understood each other so well, we bounced ideas off of each other, and Stephen was the only one who could make me feel better whenever I got so frustrated over work. I'm gonna miss all those late night writing sessions, eating Chinese food, and yeah as much as I hate admitting it, the tickle fighting.
But I know I can't be selfish about this. I have to be happy for him, I am happy for him. He doesn’t think he deserves his own show, but I know better, and he's gonna be amazing at it. But thinking about not being around Stephen all day long was not something I was looking forward to.
I kept staring at Stephen all the way across the bar. Whenever he smiled or laughed I felt myself smiling with him. There was something about Stephen and that charisma of his. He can always brighten up the room just by walking into it. He radiated that type of positivity and happiness whenever I was around him. Stephen looked up and saw me staring at him. He just smiled at me and I smiled back.
"If you guys don’t go and do it already you're gonna kill me"
Samantha Bee was standing next to me. I didn’t realize her walking away from the table and heading over me.
"I'm sorry?"
"You heard me, Stewart. It's about time you go and tell him how you really feel."
"And what's that, Sam?"
She rolled her eyes at me. "That you're in love with him."
I looked at her with surprise. I laughed at her stupid comment. "You are drunk off your ass, Sam."
"Oh please, just look at yourself right now. Staring at him with that love struck expression on your face. You're in love, dumbass."
"I am not in love with him, Sam. Stephen's my best friend. He's like a brother to me. He's the closest one I have in my life, but I'm not in love with him. Those gay innuendos were just for laughs, you know that. I'm not gay, and neither is Stephen."
"You're gay for Stephen."
"That doesn’t make sense."
"If you see how you guys look when you look at each other, it'll make sense. And I know Stephen feels the same way too you know."
"He does?"
"Ofcourse he does! But you two can't get it through your thick skulls. Man up Stewart and go make a move!"
Before I can tell her how absolutely insane she sounds, Steve was right up my face. "Would you girls stop your chit chat and get the drinks?"
I looked around and saw that our drinks were indeed ready. Steve helped me with the drinks as we headed towards our table. As soon as the rest of the group saw us coming they cheered. The only empty chair was the one next to Stephen. I looked at Stephen and he was smiling at me. I smiled back but quickly looked away. All of a sudden I felt uncomfortable. What Sam was saying really stuck in my head but it was insane. I'm not in love with Stephen. I can't be. We're just really good friends. If I knew that Sam was talking out of her ass, then why did it get to me that much?
"I wanna give a toast to our man, Stephen Colbert!" Steve spoke up and snapped be back to reality. "Stephen, we worked together in Second City, I was kind of your mentor back then, and you looked up to me. You were so eager to learn and I can't blame you for it, I really was the king of improv. I was talented, sexy, and funny and everyone wanted to fuck me."
"You sure you weren't high on something back then, Steve? Who'd wanna fuck you?" Rob interrupted him. We all laughed.
"You're just jealous because I turned you down the first time we met, Corddry." Steve retorted.
"Oooooohhh!" We all yelled back. Rob was just about to say something, but Steve just continued on with his speech.
"As I was saying, I was amazing and everyone wanted to fuck me. I'm just that irresistible. Anyhow, Stephen, when I saw you work I knew you were gonna be the next Steve Carell. And I was okay with that. I knew I was destined for something bigger and better. I was gonna become a movie star. And when I do, I couldn’t ask for anyone better to take my place than you."
"I'm flattered, Steve." Stephen said.
"And then to my surprise we both landed a gig on the daily show. I was so happy to work with you again that I put my dreams of becoming a movie star on hold."
"Oh, Stevie you didn’t have to." Stephen said sarcastically. The rest of us laughed.
"No, it's okay. I wanted to. I thought this was a sign that you still needed me, and I was just honored. You looked up to me and you didn't wanna let me go! You were like that grown man who still lives with his parents. But now, you son of a bitch, you're leaving me!" Steve pretended to weep."You're leaving meee!"
We just couldn’t take it anymore. We all laughed, except for Steve, he really was the only one who can hold up his act for so long.
"How dare you? You think you're better than me? You just go up and leave? I sacrificed my career for you!" Steve was still ranting on and we were still laughing our asses off, wiping off tears of laughter. "So I raise my glass to Stephen, you have grown out of the cocoon, you may fly away now, and meet the other butterflies in the world, but I will hunt you down again, and tell your butterfly friends that you're a backstabber and you're just gonna leave them when you find someone better. I love you, man. To Stephen"
We all raised our glasses, still laughing "To Stephen."
Stephen was actually tearing up, and Steve hugged him. When he pulled away he ruffled Stephen's hair. "I know it's still gonna be a couple of months since you actually leave, but we're really gonna miss you, buddy."
"I'm gonna miss you guys too. Now I can't top Steve's speech but I do wanna say something. You have no idea how much all of you guys mean to me. For the past couple of years you've all been like family. I have no one here in New York besides you guys. Thank you for all your support and for everything you did for me all these years. I know it's difficult to pretend to enjoy me ranting about my lord of the rings obsessions, so I guess that’s why you never really tried to humor me, even though I sit and listen about you guys complaining about everything. But I especially really wanna thank Jon."
Stephen put his arm around me and I just wished that it was dark enough for them not to see me blush a bit. I knew Sam was trying to catch my eye but I didn't want to. I felt uncomfortable again and just stared at the ground.
"Um Stephen, I told you before you don’t have to thank me." I really wished he didn't. I never liked the attention I got.
"Oh, Jonny boy, you're always so modest. But I just wanted to say that if it weren't for Jon, I wouldn't have gotten this. I learned a lot from you and it is all because of you. Sorry Steve."
Everyone laughed and I giggled. Steve said something but I was too distracted with Stephen's arm around me, Stephen being so close to me, damn you Sam.
"So, thank you. And I'm gonna thank you every day until you finally change your mind and know that all this happened because of you, to Jon."
"To Jon!" Everyone cheered. Stephen drew me closer and planted a kiss on my check. I tried to look up for a moment and met Sam's eyes. She was clearly giving me the I-told-you-so look. I couldn't take all this pressure that sprung upon me. As I wanted to stand up and make an excuse to get out of there, Ed stood up "Let's get this fucking party started! Shots!"
Everyone cheered. I stood up and Stephen withdrew his arm from me. He gave me a confused look. I stared at those big brown eyes of his and at that moment everything changed for me. I had this sudden urge to jump on him and kiss the life out of him. Maybe it was just the booze talking, but I knew I had to get out of there.
"I have to go. I don’t feel so good."
Everyone started protesting and I heard someone booing but I couldn’t concentrate on anyone besides Stephen. What the fuck, Jon? Get it together. I didn’t know if I was being paranoid but I saw something in Stephen's eyes too. As if some realization dawned upon us all of a sudden. He didn’t say anything. As I said goodbye to the group, they all protested, but I didn’t care. I was too distracted and I heard Sam telling them to let me go.
I walked out of the bar and I tried to relax. What the fuck happened back there? I can blame it on the booze but I know I didn’t drink that much. I can blame it on Sam but that still didn’t make sense why all of a sudden I wanted to jump Stephen's bones.
I started walking; maybe a walk could clear my head a bit. I walked into the alleyway and stopped. Christ, I could really use a cigarette now. I turned around to buy a pack from across the street, and suddenly stopped.
That's when I saw him, Stephen. Fuck me, something horrible is gonna happen. I'm gonna do something that I'll regret for the rest of my life, I can feel it.