[Day 220: well]
Well, however tomorrow goes is how it'll go.
I think it's starting to go back to that feeling I got during the summer program where I was just like screw it, I don't care how it goes, and did everything last minute and barely practiced my speeches. I know I shouldn't be like that, and I should actually practice, but when it comes down to it, I guess I don't care about looking stupid, because I feel stupid everyday haha. At least I'll have a powerpoint to work off of. I really wish I had the courage and ability to just have some simple outline, not a script, and just say what I want in Japanese. One guy in my class even has his notes written down in English and he translates as he goes. Aughh that's the difference between someone who speaks to their immediate family members in Japanese and someone who doesn't. >_<
I keep saying that I won't use a script that I'll follow line by line, but I always lose confidence right before and end up bringing the script just in case. And then of course I end up looking at it constantly to try to not mess up. Hahhh.... well depending on my practice before bedtime I might try to just use the powerpoint and some bullet points to help me out. My grammar will probably go to crap, but if I can get better confidence then all the better. D:
And it's pretty much a given that I'll fail my kanji quiz. I'm actually probably going to get a B or lower this term just because I've been doing badly on quizzes. I never seem to have time to study. Or I've been too lazy and haven't had enough time to make real flash cards [because there are a billion kanji each time] so I don't study properly.
Anyway I'm sick of talking about this. Let's just get tomorrow done with and then I can enjoy Friday afternoon at the guest house and then actually have the weekend to work on homework.
I think it's starting to go back to that feeling I got during the summer program where I was just like screw it, I don't care how it goes, and did everything last minute and barely practiced my speeches. I know I shouldn't be like that, and I should actually practice, but when it comes down to it, I guess I don't care about looking stupid, because I feel stupid everyday haha. At least I'll have a powerpoint to work off of. I really wish I had the courage and ability to just have some simple outline, not a script, and just say what I want in Japanese. One guy in my class even has his notes written down in English and he translates as he goes. Aughh that's the difference between someone who speaks to their immediate family members in Japanese and someone who doesn't. >_<
I keep saying that I won't use a script that I'll follow line by line, but I always lose confidence right before and end up bringing the script just in case. And then of course I end up looking at it constantly to try to not mess up. Hahhh.... well depending on my practice before bedtime I might try to just use the powerpoint and some bullet points to help me out. My grammar will probably go to crap, but if I can get better confidence then all the better. D:
And it's pretty much a given that I'll fail my kanji quiz. I'm actually probably going to get a B or lower this term just because I've been doing badly on quizzes. I never seem to have time to study. Or I've been too lazy and haven't had enough time to make real flash cards [because there are a billion kanji each time] so I don't study properly.
Anyway I'm sick of talking about this. Let's just get tomorrow done with and then I can enjoy Friday afternoon at the guest house and then actually have the weekend to work on homework.