Really really bad fiction...
Sure enough, next morning, after a light breakfast, Hayley moved off to her study, and sat cross-legged on the floor, with the bag of books beside her. She settled in, then moved the bag over until it was in her lap, and started to rummage through it, looking for that one title the other mother had been after. 'The Princess and... and... What was that title?' she thought to herself, finding no less than three 'The Princes and' titled tales in her bag of strikingly similar children's books. 'Well, I guess I'll just have to read all three...' she mused to herself, plucking 'The Princess and the Golden Staircase' from the pile, because it looked shorter, and was on top. The first thing she read was the title, "The Princess, and the Golden Staircase." she said, grimacing at herself, thinking 'I sound weird, my baby girl is going to think I'm weird, why am I doing this again? It's weird and wrong and not right and not normal, and whyyy?' But, she took a moment, and shook herself, forcing a more confident tone, or trying to.
"The Princess and the Golden Staircase." she read, running her fingers along the title on the cover of the book, before opening it. The artwork was actually quite nice, clear and crisp, in pastel shades. There was the princess, in a beautifully flowing princess like kind of gown, of the palest purple, and long white gloves on her long slender hands, and dainty heeled slippers on her delicate feet, with a pretty little rose bud mouth, and wide blue eyes, and flowing locks of the finest blonde. Hayley grimaced, and ran her hand through her own mousy brown hair. Such unrealistic images! Pretty, though, oh so pretty. Hayley shook herself yet again, she just kept getting carried away and that just wouldn't do, but somehow she continued to read. "Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a wise old king, and he had a beautiful wife, the most beautiful in all the land, to be his queen." Hayley grimaced at the wording, of course the king's wife would be the queen, what kind of story is this? Also, wise old king with a beautiful wife of child-bearing age? Robbing the cradle much? She shuddered, but continued, maybe the princess could redeem this story, though she rather doubted it, it was seeming less and less likely with every word she read.
"Where were we? Right. Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a wise old king, and he had a beautiful wife, the most beautiful in all the land, to be his queen. Life was good for the king and queen, though quiet, and lonely, until the day that the stork..." she trailed off, and looked downwards. "Look, kid, there's no such thing as a stork that delivers babies, midwives deliver babies, doctors deliver babies, but storks... Storks do not deliver babies." the mother to be chuckled softly, then added, "I'll explain when you're older. Way way older. Like, a hundred and three." before turning her attention back to the book, "Alright. Yes. Life was good for the king and queen, though quiet, and lonely, until the day that the stork blessed them... blessed them? Oh, come on... Alright... Until the day that the stork blessed them with a beautiful baby girl, named Cressida Oriana Golden Soul? Gah, that's a stupid name, this is a stupid book, forget this!" she shook her head, closing the book with a decisive snap and stuffing it back into the bag. Cressida Oriana Golden Soul? Man, where do you even start with a name like that? Stupid book. She could write something better... Wait, she could write something better! That was a brilliant idea!
"The Princess and the Golden Staircase." she read, running her fingers along the title on the cover of the book, before opening it. The artwork was actually quite nice, clear and crisp, in pastel shades. There was the princess, in a beautifully flowing princess like kind of gown, of the palest purple, and long white gloves on her long slender hands, and dainty heeled slippers on her delicate feet, with a pretty little rose bud mouth, and wide blue eyes, and flowing locks of the finest blonde. Hayley grimaced, and ran her hand through her own mousy brown hair. Such unrealistic images! Pretty, though, oh so pretty. Hayley shook herself yet again, she just kept getting carried away and that just wouldn't do, but somehow she continued to read. "Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a wise old king, and he had a beautiful wife, the most beautiful in all the land, to be his queen." Hayley grimaced at the wording, of course the king's wife would be the queen, what kind of story is this? Also, wise old king with a beautiful wife of child-bearing age? Robbing the cradle much? She shuddered, but continued, maybe the princess could redeem this story, though she rather doubted it, it was seeming less and less likely with every word she read.
"Where were we? Right. Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a wise old king, and he had a beautiful wife, the most beautiful in all the land, to be his queen. Life was good for the king and queen, though quiet, and lonely, until the day that the stork..." she trailed off, and looked downwards. "Look, kid, there's no such thing as a stork that delivers babies, midwives deliver babies, doctors deliver babies, but storks... Storks do not deliver babies." the mother to be chuckled softly, then added, "I'll explain when you're older. Way way older. Like, a hundred and three." before turning her attention back to the book, "Alright. Yes. Life was good for the king and queen, though quiet, and lonely, until the day that the stork blessed them... blessed them? Oh, come on... Alright... Until the day that the stork blessed them with a beautiful baby girl, named Cressida Oriana Golden Soul? Gah, that's a stupid name, this is a stupid book, forget this!" she shook her head, closing the book with a decisive snap and stuffing it back into the bag. Cressida Oriana Golden Soul? Man, where do you even start with a name like that? Stupid book. She could write something better... Wait, she could write something better! That was a brilliant idea!