(no subject)
i feel as if i'm in a stalemate right now. life is good. and yet, i'm not driven, really. i think that i get so excited for the big events in my life that i view the normal, everyday ones as nothing or just fluff in getting to the big events. i wonder how to appreciate, and i mean truly appreciate, the little things. i'm afraid that i'll miss something really important that's hidden as an everyday thing. hmmm....
i want to get into something... hopefully when the E-Team starts, i'll be able to throw myself into that. hmmm....
i'm moving out of my mom's house today. that's going to be weird for both of us, but i think it will be for the best. cause then, there's nothing for her to complain about concerning me and my living situation. i'll be "free" from the constant nagging and feeling like a failure. cause it seemed, when i was living there, like i could never do everything right. ever. like whenever she'd call my name, i would dred it. that meant i did something wrong or forgot to do something, no matter how careful i was. but that's in the past.
that's one of my new things... i'm trying to put my past right where it belongs- in the past. i learned from it, and now it's time to keep it there. because my future life has no room for past mistakes and worries. case in point... Melissa and the whole anthony/henry issue. i talked to her yesterday:) i was so proud of myself:)
ok, off to move and do laundry.
loves all around,
Ryanne
i want to get into something... hopefully when the E-Team starts, i'll be able to throw myself into that. hmmm....
i'm moving out of my mom's house today. that's going to be weird for both of us, but i think it will be for the best. cause then, there's nothing for her to complain about concerning me and my living situation. i'll be "free" from the constant nagging and feeling like a failure. cause it seemed, when i was living there, like i could never do everything right. ever. like whenever she'd call my name, i would dred it. that meant i did something wrong or forgot to do something, no matter how careful i was. but that's in the past.
that's one of my new things... i'm trying to put my past right where it belongs- in the past. i learned from it, and now it's time to keep it there. because my future life has no room for past mistakes and worries. case in point... Melissa and the whole anthony/henry issue. i talked to her yesterday:) i was so proud of myself:)
ok, off to move and do laundry.
loves all around,
Ryanne