Hideaway
Hideaway Chen/Lay 3451w. Pg-13
Yixing is clingy, but Jongdae is used to it.
unbeta'd. Wow. A fic not written for an exchange what a wild ride I can't believe. (I started this months ago but finally finished it yes hello)
Yixing is clingy. He always has been; grabbing Jongdae’s hands as they talk, invading his personal space while they watch movies, or wrapping his arms around Jongdae’s waist while he tries to make coffee in the morning.
Jongdae is used to it. In fact he secretly takes pleasure in every little time Yixing pays extra attention to him, storing away each moment in his mind for later, feline smile growing wider with every touch, every warm look thrown his way.
Yixing also likes taking pictures. Photos of Jongdae cooking, photos of Jongdae reading, sometimes even capturing him sleeping; draped over the couch cushions, drool escaping the corners of his mouth.
Jongdae is used to this too, and insists on Yixing taking photos with him, and of him. Sometimes Jongdae sneaks pictures of Yixing in return. Photos of him lost in thought, or lost in nothing at all. Photos of him dancing, photos of him fixing Jongdae’s failed attempts at cooking, photos of Yixing curled up in his egg chair, hand trailing on the floor.
The apartment they share is a studio apartment, open and sunny, but lacking in privacy. They each are granted one room to themselves, separated by blinds they’ve hung. Jongdae’s are simple, dark colours. Yixing calls him boring, but Jongdae likes to call himself simple. Yixing’s are colourful, with intricate patterns and adorned with beads. Jongdae calls Yixing a “goddamned hippie”, but Yixing just responds by poking him on the nose and saying creativity has no labels.
They don’t have a lot of rules, except one rule they both share. Do not enter each other’s private space unless granted express permission. Jongdae isn’t sure why they have this rule, considering him and Yixing have been friends since they were obnoxious 12-year-olds, but Yixing insists.
Jongdae doesn’t mind really, his only reason for being upset at first is that he can no longer hop into Yixing’s bed and cuddle his best friend on rainy days, but they have the guest bed for that, conveniently placed in the middle of the apartment in front of the television, where they’ve spent many weekends feeling extra single, sharing each other’s warmth, Yixing sobbing into Jongdae’s shirt while watching A Walk To Remember.
Jongdae you don’t understand, SHE’S DEAD AND HE LOVED HER.
Moments like this are Jongdae’s favourites. He revels in the snuggly afterglow of Yixing’s movie breakdowns, when the older boy is sleepy, burrowing deeper into Jongdae’s arms under their thick mickey mouse blankets.
Jongdae swears they are not dating. They are manly best friends that happen watch romantic comedies, and cuddle, and take naps together, and play with each other’s hair while listening to the soft pelting of the rain against the windows. Totally platonic.
It’s one night, when Jongdae is lounging on the guest bed flipping through re runs of bad tv shows and Yixing practically falls through the door, absolutely wasted, that Jongdae realizes he might have a not-so-small crush on the other boy.
Yixing pauses in the middle of the room, seeming lost for a second, until he spots Jongdae sitting on the guest bed, looking mildly amused, but also concerned. If Jongdae thinks Yixing is clingy normally he has clearly underestimated the other, as Yixing jump lands onto him, Jongdae just barely managing to catch Yixing before he ends up getting crushed.
“Jongdae, my pretty dongsaeng, my lovely best friend, I love you.” Jongdae blushes furiously as Yixing’s arms wrap around his waist, and he nearly chokes on his own saliva when he feels hands slip underneath his shirt. It’s only then, that he realizes Yixing isn’t alone, and he glances over to the nervous looking boy standing at the door who is licking his lips and eyeing Jongdae with something that looks like distaste.
Jongdae blinks rapidly, and hastily reaches down to pry Yixing’s hands from hips, where the boy has started to rub distracting circles into them, head resting on his back, murmuring slurred words in Mandarin that he can’t understand.
“Thanks for, uh, bringing Yixing home. I hope he wasn’t too much of a hassle?” Jongdae starts, blush still on his face, not making eye contact with the boy. Who is actually very pretty, Jongdae almost admires Yixing’s taste for a second, before jealousy overcomes him, and he frowns. “I know he can be really clingy when he’s drunk and-”
“Are you two dating? I only see one bed.” The boy cuts Jongdae off harshly, voice coming out clipped and dangerous. Which really doesn’t work because the boy doesn’t look dangerous. In fact with his fluttery eyelashes, and pursed lips, he looks like a rather cute deer.
Jongdae sits up straight hurriedly, trying to remove the very intoxicated Yixing from him, but he only clings tighter, whimpering into Jongdae’s sleeve and his frown deepens.
“No, no we’re not dating. I’m just his best friend and roommate. This is the guest bed, we have separate beds..” Jongdae trails off when the boy by the door takes a step forward and peers down at him sceptically.
“Oh really? Just best friends?” The good looking boy huffs. “Because we were on a date and the entire time this kid just keeps talking about someone named ‘Jongdae’ and how much he appreciates Jongdae and wow! Jongdae. And then he gets fucking wasted and starts crying and tells me to bring him home so he can see his Jongdae. So I really don’t believe your story, but you can tell Yixing not to call me for another date because he’s obviously got his priorities right in front of him.”
Jongdae just dumbly sits in shock, mouth agape, unsure of what to say, and watches as the boy turns on his heel, and stomps out of their apartment, slamming the door behind him. Jongdae deflates, a mix of emotions going through his head as he registers what just happened. He’s trying to figure out how to apologize to Yixing in the morning for accidentally ruining his date, when said boy licks his ear, and Jongdae lets out a loud, surprised yelp and shoots away from his friend on the bed.
“What the fuck Yixing did you just lick me?”
Yixing crawls across the bed to where Jongdae is sitting looking scandalized, and pillows himself into Jongdae, putting his head on his chest, and Jongdae’s heart is beating fast, too fast, and he hopes Yixing is too drunk to notice, too drunk to remember.
Jongdae carefully pries the extremely out of it Yixing off him to put him to bed, but Yixing is stubborn, and clings tighter.
“Let’s sleep together tonight.” Yixing is slurring his words badly, and Jongdae isn’t sure is he’s even coherent enough to know what he’s saying, so he relents, helping Yixing change into a comfortable shirt. Which happens to belong to him -since Yixing still won’t let him in his room even while this intoxicated- and tucks his best friend into the guest bed, before climbing in next to him.
Jongdae tries to keep some distance on the queen size bed from Yixing, but his best friend has other plans, climbing on top of Jongdae and curling up like a kitten, tucking himself into Jongdae’s chest, murmuring something in Chinese that Jongdae doesn’t understand.
Jongdae sighs, resigning himself to his fate, and drifts off to sleep, heart still beating loud enough he feels the neighbours can probably hear it.
-
Jongdae can’t figure out why he’s so warm, but he doesn’t really care, snuggling into the arms encircling him, starting to doze off again before he remembers that he has arms encircling him and Jongdae panics because oh my God he’s cuddling with his best friend turned crush in a way more intimate way than they usually cuddle.
Jongdae tries to wriggle himself out of Yixing’s arms, knowing the other boy probably doesn’t remember last night, and he really, really doesn’t want to explain why they’re sleeping together on the guest bed. He shouldn’t be this panicked, they cuddle all the time while watching movies, they used to have “sleepovers” all the time, but something feels different this time, and Jongdae wasn’t harboring an awful crush (maybe more) all those times.
Yixing tightens his arms around Jongdae the second he tries to make his escape, and murmurs something into his shoulder that Jongdae doesn’t quite catch.
Jongdae twists in Yixing’s hold and presses flat palms to his chest finally finding success in pushing him away, and Yixing whines and pouts into a pillow, looking up at Jongdae pitifully.
“How hungover are you?”
Yixing’s only response is a drawn out moan of pain, and Jongdae sighs, giving up, and stalks off to the kitchen area of their studio apartment, making sure to complain the entire way.
“Jongdae why am I home? And why did we sleep in the guest bed?”
Yixing sounds confused, and a little put out, and Jongdae wonders how much he actually remembers from the remainder of his date, and after arriving home.
“Your date dropped you off, and then you wouldn’t let me go to bed, and insisted we cuddle, and now here we are.” Jongdae’s voice is clipped, and guarded and he really hopes Yixing doesn’t ask what his date said.
“Did I ruin my date?”
Jongdae makes the mistake of turning around to look at Yixing, and nearly runs over to comfort him because the boy looks ridiculously adorable and ridiculously sad and confused, and Jongdae’s heart is tugging in his chest.
The light from the bay window is hitting Yixing perfectly, lighting his face up, and highlighting his features, and even though his hair is disheveled, and his mouth is pouting, and his clothes are wrinkled, Yixing looks beautiful.
Instead of answering the question, Jongdae whips out of his phone and snaps a picture of Yixing, grinning at his work, and turns back to stove where he’s frying eggs, sunny side up, just the way he knows Yixing likes them.
“Do you want hashbrowns with this?”
Jongdae doesn’t get an answer, and he doesn’t need to turn around to know that Yixing is probably sitting with his arms crossed, giving him that look that Yixing has when he’s slightly pissed off. Jongdae sighs.
“Okay, I ruined your date, or maybe you did, or maybe we both did. I don’t know, I’m sorry.”
He hears Yixing shuffle out of bed and over to the kitchen, and he keeps his eyes on the cooking food, biting his lip nervously.
Jongdae jumps a little when he feels a pair of arms wrap around his waist, and a chin rest on his shoulder, and he can feel heat rising to his cheeks, and his heart pound in his chest, even though this is normal, something Yixing does everyday.
Jongdae actually drops his spoon when he hears Yixing’s voice directly in his ear, low with sleep, quiet and inviting.
“Lu Han was boring anyways, I’d rather be here with you.” Yixing mutters, draping himself over Jongdae, and he huffs with the dead weight, trying to maneuver with his roommate attached to him. He tries not to let Yixing’s words affect him, but his stomach is fluttering and he bites his lip, panicking slightly.
“What do you mean?”
“I’d rather spend my sad, hungover morning with my best friend rather than some pretty boy who knows nothing about art and only talks about his korean ex.” Yixing mumbles into his shirt, and Jongdae sighs, prying him off and leading him back to the bed.
“Go back to sleep, Xing. I’ll wake you when the food’s ready okay?” Jongdae says, and he can’t help but to reach out a hand and run it through Yixing’s hair, smiling softly at the tired, content sigh the other releases, and Jongdae wants to crawl in bed with him, fit himself back in the warm embrace he woke up in.
But he stops himself, finishing the eggs and hashbrowns and bring the small tv tray over to Yixing, sitting himself next to the boy, flitting through channels absentmindedly, and he glances over confused when Yixing hasn’t taken a bite.
The boy is staring at his food, pouting a little, looking lost, and Jongdae taps him on the shoulder, calls his name quietly, and Yixing starts, blinks at him, and Jongdae giggles.
“You okay there? I didn’t make this food for it go cold you know.”
“Jongdae, you seem off. Did I do something last night to upset you? I’m sorry if I did and I just don’t remember-”
“No, no you didn’t it’s fine. I just feel bad.” Jongdae panics, cutting Yixing off, and he sees the other raise a brow, obviously not believing him, but Jongdae is grateful when Yixing drops the subject chewing thoughtfully on his hashbrowns.
Yixing doesn't bring it up again, and Jongdae nearly forgets about his weird mood, nearly forgets about what happened, until a month later when he's lounging on the guest bed, watching some shitty tv show about brides, and he catches sight of a piece of paper on the ground.
This makes Jongdae frown a lot because he prides in their apartment being spotlessly clean, despite Yixing's habit of leaving piles of clothes everywhere, and he flops out of bed and onto the floor, not even bothering to stand up as he scoots himself across the sleek wood to reach the paper.
Which isn't even a paper at all, but a small polaroid, of himself no less. Jongdae quirks his head at it, and he recognizes the photo as one Yixing had taken the other day while they were watching some home improvement show, telling Jongdae that he'd looked really cute with his mouth hanging open, absorbed in how to paint your child's room. (Jongdae just really likes home improvement shows.)
Jongdae smiles at the photo, and at his silly facial expression, and he wonders why Yixing has this printed out, and why it's sitting on the floor, and he stands up to return it to Yixing's room, but he stops in his tracks.
He's not exactly allowed to go in Yixing's room, and he's never really thought past this rule, never really considered sneaking in, but his mind has been filled with nothing but Yixing lately, filled with nothing but dimpled smiles and warm hands curled around his waist, and he can't help himself this time.
Jongdae runs over to lock the door just in case Yixing comes in while he's snooping, hoping that the sound will alert him and give him more time, and he steps past the guilt and into his curiosity, drawing past the curtain to Yixing's small private space.
Jongdae nearly drops the photo still in his hands in shock, and he gapes open mouthed at the curtains, which are covered with polaroid photos, prints and drawings. All of himself. Every single photo that Yixing has ever taken of Jongdae is on the walls, each one squiggled with a little emoji, or a little bit of Chinese word, and Jongdae is taken aback, and he sits down on the bed, taking in every single one, wishing he'd paid attention to his Chinese classes when he can't read the little notes on and in between the photos.
He's so caught up in his discovery that he doesn't hear the lock turn, and doesn't hear the door close to signal Yixing's return, and he almost falls off the bed when Yixing pulls open the curtain and freezes dead, staring at Jongdae with an unreadable look.
Jongdae scrambles off the bed, shoving the polaroid into Yixing’s hands, and shut himself in his own private area, heart pounding in his chest furiously, shoving a fist in his mouth to stop an anxiety filled squeal from coming out.
Jongdae is kind of worried Yixing is angry with him, but he's mostly just thinking about the photos lining the curtained walls of Yixing's room, and why they're there.
He thinks of what Yixing's date had said about him pining for his roommate all evening, and he thinks of Yixing's drunk cuddling, and Yixing seeming nervous during breakfast, and he wonders if maybe his feelings are reciprocated. Of course that's just wishful thinking. Why would Yixing, his perfect best friend, go for someone like him? Jongdae's seen the boys he's into, and he doesn't measure up to that, is content just being Yixing's roommate and friend.
He's so lost in his worries and thoughts that he again doesn't hear Yixing approach and he glances up wide-eyed when the curtain around him carefully opens, and Yixing's face pops through, and Jongdae relaxes a little when Yixing doesn't look angry, doesn't look like he's about to start yelling or something.
For a while they just stare at each other, Jongdae nervously gulping and Yixing looking slightly lost, still gripping the polaroid in his hands, fidgeting slightly, folding and unfolding a corner. Jongdae coughs, bringing Yixing out of his trance, and the other boy frowns, eyes watering slightly and Jongdae panics because this is something he never wants to see Yixing do ever, and he jumps up, taking a step forward but Yixing stops him.
"Can I sit down and explain?" Yixing's voice is small, almost timid, and Jongdae feels a pang of guilt for having caused this, for giving Yixing a reason to cry and need to explain. Jongdae is curious to know why there are photos of him all over the walls, but the explanation he gets is not what he's expecting, completely opposite to what he thinks the reason is.
"Jongdae there was a reason I didn't want you going in there, and I'm sorry I made that rule, and I'm sorry you did go in there, and I understand if you think I'm totally creepy and you want to kick me out and get a new room mate, it's just that-"
"Why would I kick you out? You're my best friend Yixing. Maybe you just wanted to start a photography project or something." Jongdae interrupts, not wanting to burden his friend, not wanting Yixing to push himself, but he holds on to a sliver of hope, unconsciously leaning forward, a movement not missed by Yixing, who seems to stop breathing for a split second.
"I don't want to start a photography project." Yixing continues, getting quieter with each word, and Jongdae swallows, moves his hand to reassuringly pat Yixing's shoulder, but stops himself, limply hanging an awkward hand in mid-air. "It's just I like you a lot and I have for a while, even before we moved in together actually, and I'm sorry I thought I could distract myself by pretending to be clingy or by going on dates but it didn't work, and I didn't wnat you to find out this way."
Jongdae can practically feel his heart leaping out of his chest, and he smiles, curling his awkward hand around Yixing's hand instead pulling the boy forward and Yixing yelps in confusion, refusing to make eye contact with him. Jongdae reaches out, tilting Yixing's chin up so they make eye-contact, and he smiles again, pausing when he gets a bout of unsureity.
"But I like you too silly." He says, curling a hand around the back of Yixing's neck, pressing their lips together gently, lovingly, and he can feel Yixing relax, can feel lips move against his, and Jongdae is pleased by this turn of events, and he grins as his roommates lips part to invite him in.
-
They never really discuss the photo thing, and Jongdae takes to hanging up his own polaroids of Yixing all over his curtains - on the outside where everyone can see them much to Yixing's embarrassment - and Yixing continues to be just as clingy, even more so now, and Jongdae finds himself being pushed down into soft blankets by plush lips quite a lot, but he really doesn't mind.
They end up discarding their private rooms completely when they realize they spend a lot more time in the guest bed, and they still watch bad romantic comedies, and Yixing still cries at sad movies. And really, nothing has changed between them besides the addition of kissing and maybe some naked cuddling, and some other more intense cuddling activities.
Jongdae supposes he really should thank Lu Han for dropping Yixing off that night, and should really thank Yixing for his forgetfulness bringing them together, and when he grins about it one night, curled up under the ugly Disney blankets and Yixing sleepily asks him what's so funny, he just kisses his boyfriend on the nose and tells him that he's just thinking about Lu Han and wine, much to Yixing's confusion.
When Jongdae wakes up to the warmth from his side gone, and the smell of hashbrowns drifting through the air he's brought back to that morning a while back, and he smiles that secretive smile, padding over to Yixing to wrap arms around his waist and bury his nose in his neck. He could really stay here forever.
Yixing is clingy, but Jongdae is used to it.
unbeta'd. Wow. A fic not written for an exchange what a wild ride I can't believe. (I started this months ago but finally finished it yes hello)
Yixing is clingy. He always has been; grabbing Jongdae’s hands as they talk, invading his personal space while they watch movies, or wrapping his arms around Jongdae’s waist while he tries to make coffee in the morning.
Jongdae is used to it. In fact he secretly takes pleasure in every little time Yixing pays extra attention to him, storing away each moment in his mind for later, feline smile growing wider with every touch, every warm look thrown his way.
Yixing also likes taking pictures. Photos of Jongdae cooking, photos of Jongdae reading, sometimes even capturing him sleeping; draped over the couch cushions, drool escaping the corners of his mouth.
Jongdae is used to this too, and insists on Yixing taking photos with him, and of him. Sometimes Jongdae sneaks pictures of Yixing in return. Photos of him lost in thought, or lost in nothing at all. Photos of him dancing, photos of him fixing Jongdae’s failed attempts at cooking, photos of Yixing curled up in his egg chair, hand trailing on the floor.
The apartment they share is a studio apartment, open and sunny, but lacking in privacy. They each are granted one room to themselves, separated by blinds they’ve hung. Jongdae’s are simple, dark colours. Yixing calls him boring, but Jongdae likes to call himself simple. Yixing’s are colourful, with intricate patterns and adorned with beads. Jongdae calls Yixing a “goddamned hippie”, but Yixing just responds by poking him on the nose and saying creativity has no labels.
They don’t have a lot of rules, except one rule they both share. Do not enter each other’s private space unless granted express permission. Jongdae isn’t sure why they have this rule, considering him and Yixing have been friends since they were obnoxious 12-year-olds, but Yixing insists.
Jongdae doesn’t mind really, his only reason for being upset at first is that he can no longer hop into Yixing’s bed and cuddle his best friend on rainy days, but they have the guest bed for that, conveniently placed in the middle of the apartment in front of the television, where they’ve spent many weekends feeling extra single, sharing each other’s warmth, Yixing sobbing into Jongdae’s shirt while watching A Walk To Remember.
Jongdae you don’t understand, SHE’S DEAD AND HE LOVED HER.
Moments like this are Jongdae’s favourites. He revels in the snuggly afterglow of Yixing’s movie breakdowns, when the older boy is sleepy, burrowing deeper into Jongdae’s arms under their thick mickey mouse blankets.
Jongdae swears they are not dating. They are manly best friends that happen watch romantic comedies, and cuddle, and take naps together, and play with each other’s hair while listening to the soft pelting of the rain against the windows. Totally platonic.
It’s one night, when Jongdae is lounging on the guest bed flipping through re runs of bad tv shows and Yixing practically falls through the door, absolutely wasted, that Jongdae realizes he might have a not-so-small crush on the other boy.
Yixing pauses in the middle of the room, seeming lost for a second, until he spots Jongdae sitting on the guest bed, looking mildly amused, but also concerned. If Jongdae thinks Yixing is clingy normally he has clearly underestimated the other, as Yixing jump lands onto him, Jongdae just barely managing to catch Yixing before he ends up getting crushed.
“Jongdae, my pretty dongsaeng, my lovely best friend, I love you.” Jongdae blushes furiously as Yixing’s arms wrap around his waist, and he nearly chokes on his own saliva when he feels hands slip underneath his shirt. It’s only then, that he realizes Yixing isn’t alone, and he glances over to the nervous looking boy standing at the door who is licking his lips and eyeing Jongdae with something that looks like distaste.
Jongdae blinks rapidly, and hastily reaches down to pry Yixing’s hands from hips, where the boy has started to rub distracting circles into them, head resting on his back, murmuring slurred words in Mandarin that he can’t understand.
“Thanks for, uh, bringing Yixing home. I hope he wasn’t too much of a hassle?” Jongdae starts, blush still on his face, not making eye contact with the boy. Who is actually very pretty, Jongdae almost admires Yixing’s taste for a second, before jealousy overcomes him, and he frowns. “I know he can be really clingy when he’s drunk and-”
“Are you two dating? I only see one bed.” The boy cuts Jongdae off harshly, voice coming out clipped and dangerous. Which really doesn’t work because the boy doesn’t look dangerous. In fact with his fluttery eyelashes, and pursed lips, he looks like a rather cute deer.
Jongdae sits up straight hurriedly, trying to remove the very intoxicated Yixing from him, but he only clings tighter, whimpering into Jongdae’s sleeve and his frown deepens.
“No, no we’re not dating. I’m just his best friend and roommate. This is the guest bed, we have separate beds..” Jongdae trails off when the boy by the door takes a step forward and peers down at him sceptically.
“Oh really? Just best friends?” The good looking boy huffs. “Because we were on a date and the entire time this kid just keeps talking about someone named ‘Jongdae’ and how much he appreciates Jongdae and wow! Jongdae. And then he gets fucking wasted and starts crying and tells me to bring him home so he can see his Jongdae. So I really don’t believe your story, but you can tell Yixing not to call me for another date because he’s obviously got his priorities right in front of him.”
Jongdae just dumbly sits in shock, mouth agape, unsure of what to say, and watches as the boy turns on his heel, and stomps out of their apartment, slamming the door behind him. Jongdae deflates, a mix of emotions going through his head as he registers what just happened. He’s trying to figure out how to apologize to Yixing in the morning for accidentally ruining his date, when said boy licks his ear, and Jongdae lets out a loud, surprised yelp and shoots away from his friend on the bed.
“What the fuck Yixing did you just lick me?”
Yixing crawls across the bed to where Jongdae is sitting looking scandalized, and pillows himself into Jongdae, putting his head on his chest, and Jongdae’s heart is beating fast, too fast, and he hopes Yixing is too drunk to notice, too drunk to remember.
Jongdae carefully pries the extremely out of it Yixing off him to put him to bed, but Yixing is stubborn, and clings tighter.
“Let’s sleep together tonight.” Yixing is slurring his words badly, and Jongdae isn’t sure is he’s even coherent enough to know what he’s saying, so he relents, helping Yixing change into a comfortable shirt. Which happens to belong to him -since Yixing still won’t let him in his room even while this intoxicated- and tucks his best friend into the guest bed, before climbing in next to him.
Jongdae tries to keep some distance on the queen size bed from Yixing, but his best friend has other plans, climbing on top of Jongdae and curling up like a kitten, tucking himself into Jongdae’s chest, murmuring something in Chinese that Jongdae doesn’t understand.
Jongdae sighs, resigning himself to his fate, and drifts off to sleep, heart still beating loud enough he feels the neighbours can probably hear it.
-
Jongdae can’t figure out why he’s so warm, but he doesn’t really care, snuggling into the arms encircling him, starting to doze off again before he remembers that he has arms encircling him and Jongdae panics because oh my God he’s cuddling with his best friend turned crush in a way more intimate way than they usually cuddle.
Jongdae tries to wriggle himself out of Yixing’s arms, knowing the other boy probably doesn’t remember last night, and he really, really doesn’t want to explain why they’re sleeping together on the guest bed. He shouldn’t be this panicked, they cuddle all the time while watching movies, they used to have “sleepovers” all the time, but something feels different this time, and Jongdae wasn’t harboring an awful crush (maybe more) all those times.
Yixing tightens his arms around Jongdae the second he tries to make his escape, and murmurs something into his shoulder that Jongdae doesn’t quite catch.
Jongdae twists in Yixing’s hold and presses flat palms to his chest finally finding success in pushing him away, and Yixing whines and pouts into a pillow, looking up at Jongdae pitifully.
“How hungover are you?”
Yixing’s only response is a drawn out moan of pain, and Jongdae sighs, giving up, and stalks off to the kitchen area of their studio apartment, making sure to complain the entire way.
“Jongdae why am I home? And why did we sleep in the guest bed?”
Yixing sounds confused, and a little put out, and Jongdae wonders how much he actually remembers from the remainder of his date, and after arriving home.
“Your date dropped you off, and then you wouldn’t let me go to bed, and insisted we cuddle, and now here we are.” Jongdae’s voice is clipped, and guarded and he really hopes Yixing doesn’t ask what his date said.
“Did I ruin my date?”
Jongdae makes the mistake of turning around to look at Yixing, and nearly runs over to comfort him because the boy looks ridiculously adorable and ridiculously sad and confused, and Jongdae’s heart is tugging in his chest.
The light from the bay window is hitting Yixing perfectly, lighting his face up, and highlighting his features, and even though his hair is disheveled, and his mouth is pouting, and his clothes are wrinkled, Yixing looks beautiful.
Instead of answering the question, Jongdae whips out of his phone and snaps a picture of Yixing, grinning at his work, and turns back to stove where he’s frying eggs, sunny side up, just the way he knows Yixing likes them.
“Do you want hashbrowns with this?”
Jongdae doesn’t get an answer, and he doesn’t need to turn around to know that Yixing is probably sitting with his arms crossed, giving him that look that Yixing has when he’s slightly pissed off. Jongdae sighs.
“Okay, I ruined your date, or maybe you did, or maybe we both did. I don’t know, I’m sorry.”
He hears Yixing shuffle out of bed and over to the kitchen, and he keeps his eyes on the cooking food, biting his lip nervously.
Jongdae jumps a little when he feels a pair of arms wrap around his waist, and a chin rest on his shoulder, and he can feel heat rising to his cheeks, and his heart pound in his chest, even though this is normal, something Yixing does everyday.
Jongdae actually drops his spoon when he hears Yixing’s voice directly in his ear, low with sleep, quiet and inviting.
“Lu Han was boring anyways, I’d rather be here with you.” Yixing mutters, draping himself over Jongdae, and he huffs with the dead weight, trying to maneuver with his roommate attached to him. He tries not to let Yixing’s words affect him, but his stomach is fluttering and he bites his lip, panicking slightly.
“What do you mean?”
“I’d rather spend my sad, hungover morning with my best friend rather than some pretty boy who knows nothing about art and only talks about his korean ex.” Yixing mumbles into his shirt, and Jongdae sighs, prying him off and leading him back to the bed.
“Go back to sleep, Xing. I’ll wake you when the food’s ready okay?” Jongdae says, and he can’t help but to reach out a hand and run it through Yixing’s hair, smiling softly at the tired, content sigh the other releases, and Jongdae wants to crawl in bed with him, fit himself back in the warm embrace he woke up in.
But he stops himself, finishing the eggs and hashbrowns and bring the small tv tray over to Yixing, sitting himself next to the boy, flitting through channels absentmindedly, and he glances over confused when Yixing hasn’t taken a bite.
The boy is staring at his food, pouting a little, looking lost, and Jongdae taps him on the shoulder, calls his name quietly, and Yixing starts, blinks at him, and Jongdae giggles.
“You okay there? I didn’t make this food for it go cold you know.”
“Jongdae, you seem off. Did I do something last night to upset you? I’m sorry if I did and I just don’t remember-”
“No, no you didn’t it’s fine. I just feel bad.” Jongdae panics, cutting Yixing off, and he sees the other raise a brow, obviously not believing him, but Jongdae is grateful when Yixing drops the subject chewing thoughtfully on his hashbrowns.
Yixing doesn't bring it up again, and Jongdae nearly forgets about his weird mood, nearly forgets about what happened, until a month later when he's lounging on the guest bed, watching some shitty tv show about brides, and he catches sight of a piece of paper on the ground.
This makes Jongdae frown a lot because he prides in their apartment being spotlessly clean, despite Yixing's habit of leaving piles of clothes everywhere, and he flops out of bed and onto the floor, not even bothering to stand up as he scoots himself across the sleek wood to reach the paper.
Which isn't even a paper at all, but a small polaroid, of himself no less. Jongdae quirks his head at it, and he recognizes the photo as one Yixing had taken the other day while they were watching some home improvement show, telling Jongdae that he'd looked really cute with his mouth hanging open, absorbed in how to paint your child's room. (Jongdae just really likes home improvement shows.)
Jongdae smiles at the photo, and at his silly facial expression, and he wonders why Yixing has this printed out, and why it's sitting on the floor, and he stands up to return it to Yixing's room, but he stops in his tracks.
He's not exactly allowed to go in Yixing's room, and he's never really thought past this rule, never really considered sneaking in, but his mind has been filled with nothing but Yixing lately, filled with nothing but dimpled smiles and warm hands curled around his waist, and he can't help himself this time.
Jongdae runs over to lock the door just in case Yixing comes in while he's snooping, hoping that the sound will alert him and give him more time, and he steps past the guilt and into his curiosity, drawing past the curtain to Yixing's small private space.
Jongdae nearly drops the photo still in his hands in shock, and he gapes open mouthed at the curtains, which are covered with polaroid photos, prints and drawings. All of himself. Every single photo that Yixing has ever taken of Jongdae is on the walls, each one squiggled with a little emoji, or a little bit of Chinese word, and Jongdae is taken aback, and he sits down on the bed, taking in every single one, wishing he'd paid attention to his Chinese classes when he can't read the little notes on and in between the photos.
He's so caught up in his discovery that he doesn't hear the lock turn, and doesn't hear the door close to signal Yixing's return, and he almost falls off the bed when Yixing pulls open the curtain and freezes dead, staring at Jongdae with an unreadable look.
Jongdae scrambles off the bed, shoving the polaroid into Yixing’s hands, and shut himself in his own private area, heart pounding in his chest furiously, shoving a fist in his mouth to stop an anxiety filled squeal from coming out.
Jongdae is kind of worried Yixing is angry with him, but he's mostly just thinking about the photos lining the curtained walls of Yixing's room, and why they're there.
He thinks of what Yixing's date had said about him pining for his roommate all evening, and he thinks of Yixing's drunk cuddling, and Yixing seeming nervous during breakfast, and he wonders if maybe his feelings are reciprocated. Of course that's just wishful thinking. Why would Yixing, his perfect best friend, go for someone like him? Jongdae's seen the boys he's into, and he doesn't measure up to that, is content just being Yixing's roommate and friend.
He's so lost in his worries and thoughts that he again doesn't hear Yixing approach and he glances up wide-eyed when the curtain around him carefully opens, and Yixing's face pops through, and Jongdae relaxes a little when Yixing doesn't look angry, doesn't look like he's about to start yelling or something.
For a while they just stare at each other, Jongdae nervously gulping and Yixing looking slightly lost, still gripping the polaroid in his hands, fidgeting slightly, folding and unfolding a corner. Jongdae coughs, bringing Yixing out of his trance, and the other boy frowns, eyes watering slightly and Jongdae panics because this is something he never wants to see Yixing do ever, and he jumps up, taking a step forward but Yixing stops him.
"Can I sit down and explain?" Yixing's voice is small, almost timid, and Jongdae feels a pang of guilt for having caused this, for giving Yixing a reason to cry and need to explain. Jongdae is curious to know why there are photos of him all over the walls, but the explanation he gets is not what he's expecting, completely opposite to what he thinks the reason is.
"Jongdae there was a reason I didn't want you going in there, and I'm sorry I made that rule, and I'm sorry you did go in there, and I understand if you think I'm totally creepy and you want to kick me out and get a new room mate, it's just that-"
"Why would I kick you out? You're my best friend Yixing. Maybe you just wanted to start a photography project or something." Jongdae interrupts, not wanting to burden his friend, not wanting Yixing to push himself, but he holds on to a sliver of hope, unconsciously leaning forward, a movement not missed by Yixing, who seems to stop breathing for a split second.
"I don't want to start a photography project." Yixing continues, getting quieter with each word, and Jongdae swallows, moves his hand to reassuringly pat Yixing's shoulder, but stops himself, limply hanging an awkward hand in mid-air. "It's just I like you a lot and I have for a while, even before we moved in together actually, and I'm sorry I thought I could distract myself by pretending to be clingy or by going on dates but it didn't work, and I didn't wnat you to find out this way."
Jongdae can practically feel his heart leaping out of his chest, and he smiles, curling his awkward hand around Yixing's hand instead pulling the boy forward and Yixing yelps in confusion, refusing to make eye contact with him. Jongdae reaches out, tilting Yixing's chin up so they make eye-contact, and he smiles again, pausing when he gets a bout of unsureity.
"But I like you too silly." He says, curling a hand around the back of Yixing's neck, pressing their lips together gently, lovingly, and he can feel Yixing relax, can feel lips move against his, and Jongdae is pleased by this turn of events, and he grins as his roommates lips part to invite him in.
-
They never really discuss the photo thing, and Jongdae takes to hanging up his own polaroids of Yixing all over his curtains - on the outside where everyone can see them much to Yixing's embarrassment - and Yixing continues to be just as clingy, even more so now, and Jongdae finds himself being pushed down into soft blankets by plush lips quite a lot, but he really doesn't mind.
They end up discarding their private rooms completely when they realize they spend a lot more time in the guest bed, and they still watch bad romantic comedies, and Yixing still cries at sad movies. And really, nothing has changed between them besides the addition of kissing and maybe some naked cuddling, and some other more intense cuddling activities.
Jongdae supposes he really should thank Lu Han for dropping Yixing off that night, and should really thank Yixing for his forgetfulness bringing them together, and when he grins about it one night, curled up under the ugly Disney blankets and Yixing sleepily asks him what's so funny, he just kisses his boyfriend on the nose and tells him that he's just thinking about Lu Han and wine, much to Yixing's confusion.
When Jongdae wakes up to the warmth from his side gone, and the smell of hashbrowns drifting through the air he's brought back to that morning a while back, and he smiles that secretive smile, padding over to Yixing to wrap arms around his waist and bury his nose in his neck. He could really stay here forever.