are you kidding me with this stuff?!
So, this all started because I found an auction on eBay where they had free samsung sync phones if you sign up for a two-year contract through their online wireless store. And I ordered two. And then they said that AT&T wanted a $1,000 deposit from me. And then I said "no thank you." And then they said "Oh well we will see if we can find you a similar plan at another carrier." And I was like "yeah, right."
And then just now they call me to be like, "Oh, we got you an account via Sprint with no deposit, and we are sending you two RAZR phones." Except I already said I wasn't me when I called, so I couldn't be like "No, you are not doing any such thing, you are giving me details and you are giving me the PHONES I RESEARCHED AND ORDERED, or NOTHING." I have no interest in getting suckered into phones I don't want and contracts I haven't studied through some extremely shady-ass affiliate marketing company. (True story: wirefly, aka the hilariously named TMI wireless, which pays people $40 for each free phone they fob off on someone. God only knows what kind of kickbacks they are getting from the cell phone companies, or how else they are making their shady moolah.) I told them to call back later. The really weird thing is that they wanted to know my email address. Like, you assholes have been emailing me all along. How did you lose my email address?
Seriously: how did the cell phone world get SO filled with crazy?
Meanwhile, Annie learned that I don't get a credit check or have to pay a deposit if she switches to a family plan and I get a line on it. And I still get a discount on the phone. So we are doing that, and I logged in as her and investigated and then had the following hilariously AT&Typical conversation with some chatroom representative:
Me: I went to change my plan and got to the page that says I can click "Add a line" to start the process to add a new line or a new FamilyTalk plan to my account. But when I clicked it, it just sent me to the page of available phones. When I selected one, it told me that that phone needed a plan and offered me a bunch of individual plans for it!
Me: How do I make it understand that I want to change to a FamilyTalk plan and add a line (two actually) and get phones for those lines?
Phil: Are you just trying to change your plan?
and then:
Phil: To add a line to your account, use the 'Log In' link in the upper right of the page. Once logged in you will see a link ‘add a line’ under 'Account Profile' on the left side of the page. Clicking this link will take you to a new page where you have a choice of ‘Adding a new Plan’ or ‘Add a Line to Family Talk’. If you only have one phone on an Individual plan and want only two phones total you will want to use the option to ‘Add a new Plan’ and choose any Individual plan and phone to complete the order online, then call Customer care once you have received your new device to change those to a Family plan.
Me: I am already logged in.
Me: And that's the link that I used
Phil: Choose any Individual plan and phone to complete the order online, then call Customer care once you have received your new device to change those to a Family plan
Me: wait a minute. Like I said, I want three phones total: I am trying to add two more phones and two lines to my account.
I finally got him to explain that we couldn't do this online. She has to call them to switch to a family plan, and THEN we can add phones to it online. Except that I'm not sure I believe him, since he also said that we have to sign up for an individual plan for each phone online and then change that when we activate the phones. Like, doesn't that sound like a total scam? Why wouldn't they let you just add a fucking line and pick a phone for it?
And then just now they call me to be like, "Oh, we got you an account via Sprint with no deposit, and we are sending you two RAZR phones." Except I already said I wasn't me when I called, so I couldn't be like "No, you are not doing any such thing, you are giving me details and you are giving me the PHONES I RESEARCHED AND ORDERED, or NOTHING." I have no interest in getting suckered into phones I don't want and contracts I haven't studied through some extremely shady-ass affiliate marketing company. (True story: wirefly, aka the hilariously named TMI wireless, which pays people $40 for each free phone they fob off on someone. God only knows what kind of kickbacks they are getting from the cell phone companies, or how else they are making their shady moolah.) I told them to call back later. The really weird thing is that they wanted to know my email address. Like, you assholes have been emailing me all along. How did you lose my email address?
Seriously: how did the cell phone world get SO filled with crazy?
Meanwhile, Annie learned that I don't get a credit check or have to pay a deposit if she switches to a family plan and I get a line on it. And I still get a discount on the phone. So we are doing that, and I logged in as her and investigated and then had the following hilariously AT&Typical conversation with some chatroom representative:
Me: I went to change my plan and got to the page that says I can click "Add a line" to start the process to add a new line or a new FamilyTalk plan to my account. But when I clicked it, it just sent me to the page of available phones. When I selected one, it told me that that phone needed a plan and offered me a bunch of individual plans for it!
Me: How do I make it understand that I want to change to a FamilyTalk plan and add a line (two actually) and get phones for those lines?
Phil: Are you just trying to change your plan?
and then:
Phil: To add a line to your account, use the 'Log In' link in the upper right of the page. Once logged in you will see a link ‘add a line’ under 'Account Profile' on the left side of the page. Clicking this link will take you to a new page where you have a choice of ‘Adding a new Plan’ or ‘Add a Line to Family Talk’. If you only have one phone on an Individual plan and want only two phones total you will want to use the option to ‘Add a new Plan’ and choose any Individual plan and phone to complete the order online, then call Customer care once you have received your new device to change those to a Family plan.
Me: I am already logged in.
Me: And that's the link that I used
Phil: Choose any Individual plan and phone to complete the order online, then call Customer care once you have received your new device to change those to a Family plan
Me: wait a minute. Like I said, I want three phones total: I am trying to add two more phones and two lines to my account.
I finally got him to explain that we couldn't do this online. She has to call them to switch to a family plan, and THEN we can add phones to it online. Except that I'm not sure I believe him, since he also said that we have to sign up for an individual plan for each phone online and then change that when we activate the phones. Like, doesn't that sound like a total scam? Why wouldn't they let you just add a fucking line and pick a phone for it?