(no subject)
Who: May Decatur (March Hare) and Fred Armisen (NPC)
Where: Random coffee shop
When: March 12, 2008, lunchtime
What: In which the Hare gets cold feet.
Rated: G
May was beyond stressed out, and it showed. Only a few days left to the wedding and she couldn't even think straight. No matter what help she had, no matter how many times she had Larry go out to run errands for her, no matter how many times she looked over at Kilroy and knew that this was all going to be worth it... There was still the front part of her mind that screamed it was too hard, and she needed to run.
Taking care of Robin, picking out flowers, putting together the guest list and seating arrangements with the wedding planner; It was all so domestic. Since when were she and Kilroy domestic? The questions got harder to answer every time she was asked. Sure, maybe it was all just cold feet, but she couldn't help thinking that it was just too much too soon.
Maybe that was why she went to lunch instead of shoe shopping like she said. Maybe that was why she found herself walking to a familiar coffee shop that didn't let her have condiments anymore. Maybe that was why she slipped into the seat across from the old familiar face. Or maybe she just wanted to go back to a time when everything made a bit more sense, and she wasn't overwhelmed with the Wonderland jumble of thoughts that ran through her head thousands of times every second when she was around Kilroy and Neil. Just for once, it was nice to be just May Decatur, and not the March Hare. It was nice to be appreciated for that. It was nice to know that somewhere, someone liked her for that reason, and that reason alone.
"You're early. What's the occasion?" Fred arched a brow and looked up at her, "Please don't tell me it has to do with mustard, because this is a new shirt and I've got rehearsal today."
May shook her head, "No, no... I just wanted to talk. To you." She picked up the napkin from the table and twisted it between her hands, open and shut tight, from one corner to the other.
"I didn't think we had anything to talk about."
May let out a sigh at the statement, and put the napkin in her lap, but then put it on the table, then back in her lap again, then just back to twisting it in her hands. "Of course we do." The clarity of her mind was surprising when she wasn't around the other Wonderlanders, but there was part of her that missed the clutter and randomness since it kept her from thinking of what was really important. "I wanted to apologize..." "For what? You're getting married. Congratulations." Fred's voice was biting and just slightly cold, and it was easy to see that he was still hurt by the abruptness of May not speaking to him then begging him in a voice mail to see him.
"Fred..." May looked up at him across the table, the hustle and bustle of the people around them making her distracted. She was petrified that Kilroy was going to show up and take everything out of context. But was it? Even May wasn't sure. Still, her look was easily interpreted. "What? Does he follow you or something equally as crazy as he is?" May snapped out of her trance and directed her gaze back to him, "Huh? No. I mean, I don't think so. He's not crazy. He's... He's Kilroy."
Fred rubbed his face with the palm of his hand in exasperation, "Why are you here, May? Just get it out so you can walk back out of my life." And if May would have let herself feel guilty about what she had done to him, that probably would have set her over the edge, but really she only felt guilty about contemplating cancelling the wedding.
"Do I look like a wife?" May was worried that she wasn't going to be right for Kilroy in that capacity. She could be his friend, and she could even be his girlfriend. That was all pretty non-committal. But the idea of her being someone's wife just sent her into panics, even if it was to Kilroy.
"You look like a scared rabbit." May bit the inside of her cheek and looked down, the comment hurting her more than anything. "You look like you want to run but you're caught in the headlights." He let a pause settle in the conversation and waited for May to open her mouth to say something before continuing. "May, I'm not going to tell you what to do and what not to do. But I will tell you that you need to go with your gut feelings. You love him, right?"
"Of course I do."
"Then, what does it matter if you look like a wife or not? You're going to be the wife to him that you should be."
May still twisted the napkin in her hands and sat there in silence for a moment. And the voice that came from her lacked any trace of the March Hare, and that was something she had needed for the past few weeks. "Do you think I should be?"
"No."
And with that May's eyes widened and her jaw hung open, staring at Fred in shock.
"He makes you happy, because you think you're happy with him. Like you were written that way, in some ridiculous story."
May blinked a few times and did her best not to start laughing. If only he knew...
"I wanted advice, Fred." "I'm giving it to you, May." "Reassurance? Something? Just tell me I'm doing the right thing!"
Fred leaned over the table and grabbed May's hand, turning her engagement ring around her finger. "I can't tell you that. You know if it's right or not. You know what I'll say."
May yanked her hand out of his, his warm fingers feeling oddly foreign against her skin. "You're right. I do. I. Do." And as quickly as she sat down, May was standing again. "Goodbye, Fred," she said, the napkin fluttering to the ground beside the chair. "Bye, May," he replied, but his words were lost in the sea of people that May dove into, quickly working her way outside.
She needed to get away. She understood that. The smothering feeling of the wedding overtook her. She couldn't tell Kilroy. She couldn't. Not after she had begged him to let her stay. She couldn't live her life without him, but he deserved better than her. He did.
She wasn't going to be able to go through with it. So, she'd do what she was known for.
She'd put him out there, sell him out, and run away at the last minute.
Where: Random coffee shop
When: March 12, 2008, lunchtime
What: In which the Hare gets cold feet.
Rated: G
May was beyond stressed out, and it showed. Only a few days left to the wedding and she couldn't even think straight. No matter what help she had, no matter how many times she had Larry go out to run errands for her, no matter how many times she looked over at Kilroy and knew that this was all going to be worth it... There was still the front part of her mind that screamed it was too hard, and she needed to run.
Taking care of Robin, picking out flowers, putting together the guest list and seating arrangements with the wedding planner; It was all so domestic. Since when were she and Kilroy domestic? The questions got harder to answer every time she was asked. Sure, maybe it was all just cold feet, but she couldn't help thinking that it was just too much too soon.
Maybe that was why she went to lunch instead of shoe shopping like she said. Maybe that was why she found herself walking to a familiar coffee shop that didn't let her have condiments anymore. Maybe that was why she slipped into the seat across from the old familiar face. Or maybe she just wanted to go back to a time when everything made a bit more sense, and she wasn't overwhelmed with the Wonderland jumble of thoughts that ran through her head thousands of times every second when she was around Kilroy and Neil. Just for once, it was nice to be just May Decatur, and not the March Hare. It was nice to be appreciated for that. It was nice to know that somewhere, someone liked her for that reason, and that reason alone.
"You're early. What's the occasion?" Fred arched a brow and looked up at her, "Please don't tell me it has to do with mustard, because this is a new shirt and I've got rehearsal today."
May shook her head, "No, no... I just wanted to talk. To you." She picked up the napkin from the table and twisted it between her hands, open and shut tight, from one corner to the other.
"I didn't think we had anything to talk about."
May let out a sigh at the statement, and put the napkin in her lap, but then put it on the table, then back in her lap again, then just back to twisting it in her hands. "Of course we do." The clarity of her mind was surprising when she wasn't around the other Wonderlanders, but there was part of her that missed the clutter and randomness since it kept her from thinking of what was really important. "I wanted to apologize..." "For what? You're getting married. Congratulations." Fred's voice was biting and just slightly cold, and it was easy to see that he was still hurt by the abruptness of May not speaking to him then begging him in a voice mail to see him.
"Fred..." May looked up at him across the table, the hustle and bustle of the people around them making her distracted. She was petrified that Kilroy was going to show up and take everything out of context. But was it? Even May wasn't sure. Still, her look was easily interpreted. "What? Does he follow you or something equally as crazy as he is?" May snapped out of her trance and directed her gaze back to him, "Huh? No. I mean, I don't think so. He's not crazy. He's... He's Kilroy."
Fred rubbed his face with the palm of his hand in exasperation, "Why are you here, May? Just get it out so you can walk back out of my life." And if May would have let herself feel guilty about what she had done to him, that probably would have set her over the edge, but really she only felt guilty about contemplating cancelling the wedding.
"Do I look like a wife?" May was worried that she wasn't going to be right for Kilroy in that capacity. She could be his friend, and she could even be his girlfriend. That was all pretty non-committal. But the idea of her being someone's wife just sent her into panics, even if it was to Kilroy.
"You look like a scared rabbit." May bit the inside of her cheek and looked down, the comment hurting her more than anything. "You look like you want to run but you're caught in the headlights." He let a pause settle in the conversation and waited for May to open her mouth to say something before continuing. "May, I'm not going to tell you what to do and what not to do. But I will tell you that you need to go with your gut feelings. You love him, right?"
"Of course I do."
"Then, what does it matter if you look like a wife or not? You're going to be the wife to him that you should be."
May still twisted the napkin in her hands and sat there in silence for a moment. And the voice that came from her lacked any trace of the March Hare, and that was something she had needed for the past few weeks. "Do you think I should be?"
"No."
And with that May's eyes widened and her jaw hung open, staring at Fred in shock.
"He makes you happy, because you think you're happy with him. Like you were written that way, in some ridiculous story."
May blinked a few times and did her best not to start laughing. If only he knew...
"I wanted advice, Fred." "I'm giving it to you, May." "Reassurance? Something? Just tell me I'm doing the right thing!"
Fred leaned over the table and grabbed May's hand, turning her engagement ring around her finger. "I can't tell you that. You know if it's right or not. You know what I'll say."
May yanked her hand out of his, his warm fingers feeling oddly foreign against her skin. "You're right. I do. I. Do." And as quickly as she sat down, May was standing again. "Goodbye, Fred," she said, the napkin fluttering to the ground beside the chair. "Bye, May," he replied, but his words were lost in the sea of people that May dove into, quickly working her way outside.
She needed to get away. She understood that. The smothering feeling of the wedding overtook her. She couldn't tell Kilroy. She couldn't. Not after she had begged him to let her stay. She couldn't live her life without him, but he deserved better than her. He did.
She wasn't going to be able to go through with it. So, she'd do what she was known for.
She'd put him out there, sell him out, and run away at the last minute.