There Goes The New Year, Welcome 2010!
I read an article I once wrote for our school paper. It's titled 'There Goes The New Year, Welcome 2002!' Time flies so fast. The pictures are still vivid; the memories are still intact.
I am an associate editor for the Journalese Society newspaper. I have my own column and have the license to rant all I want. Everyone from our university's society knows me. They read my column bi-monthly and every time the paper comes out, I feel good. I am on my way to becoming what I wanted to be - A Journalist.
Though that was like... what... exactly six years ago! What happened within the six-year gap is not vivid, not memorable. I am just someone who's trying to live up to the expectations of others - family's breadwinner. I fear that in my quest to give back to my parents and family what they've done for me before, I've lost myself. i have no drive to write anymore. I have no will to attain what I wanted in life. My New Year's resolution had always include (1) learning French (2) take up HTML class (3) buy a condo (4) learn to drive (5) travel outside the Philippines; but nope, I never got to doing any of these - ever!
So is it wrong to give what you can give to your family and eventually lose yourself? Or should I sacrifice them in order for me to be me?
Life is tough. Life is unfair and biased. Life is full of choices that I don't really know if I ever want to ponder on.
What is there for me in 2010? Another 365 days of work, home, net life?
I'm tired but I can't rest. I want to say no but I can't dare myself to do it. What is wrong with me? I'm Icarus. I think I stayed too close to the sun and I'm falling now. Falling and I don't know if someone is there to catch my fall.
I am an associate editor for the Journalese Society newspaper. I have my own column and have the license to rant all I want. Everyone from our university's society knows me. They read my column bi-monthly and every time the paper comes out, I feel good. I am on my way to becoming what I wanted to be - A Journalist.
Though that was like... what... exactly six years ago! What happened within the six-year gap is not vivid, not memorable. I am just someone who's trying to live up to the expectations of others - family's breadwinner. I fear that in my quest to give back to my parents and family what they've done for me before, I've lost myself. i have no drive to write anymore. I have no will to attain what I wanted in life. My New Year's resolution had always include (1) learning French (2) take up HTML class (3) buy a condo (4) learn to drive (5) travel outside the Philippines; but nope, I never got to doing any of these - ever!
So is it wrong to give what you can give to your family and eventually lose yourself? Or should I sacrifice them in order for me to be me?
Life is tough. Life is unfair and biased. Life is full of choices that I don't really know if I ever want to ponder on.
What is there for me in 2010? Another 365 days of work, home, net life?
I'm tired but I can't rest. I want to say no but I can't dare myself to do it. What is wrong with me? I'm Icarus. I think I stayed too close to the sun and I'm falling now. Falling and I don't know if someone is there to catch my fall.