Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely
Why? Why the fuck, why?
*Charlie Brown -- argh*
Tonight was supposed to be the best night of the school year. So why the fuck am I spending it in tears?
Everything started out well, for the most part. I met my mom, grandma, aunt and Mike at Olive Garden. My aunt and grandma bought me a gorgeous bouquet of roses in a very pretty vase. We all had dinner...that chicken was amazing. My dad and my brother ran late and by the time they showed up at the restaurant, Mike and I had to leave.
We came back to my room and had some amazing time to ourselves. The first time we got to lie down together on my bed. It was special. And I loved it.
I introduced Mike to Brian before the show. They are both great guys and so civilized.
I ran into Gugu before getting into my costume. Yay formal!!
The show had its ups and downs. Kissing and flashing Brian with my family and boyfriend in the audience was much less painful than I had been anticipating. The telephone rang, the television worked. Someone called Jes in the middle of one of the scenes and I had to talk my way out of it. I lost my headband five minutes before I needed it. Brian, Pat, Jes, and Emily were all running around trying to find it. When Brian went on stage, I didn't have one. Pat found it upstairs in the costume room and got it to me right before I went on. Took Brian completely by surprise. lol The interview went fine. Stage crew forgot to put out the coffee cake, so I had to set it out myself. When Michelle and I had to break apart our "peanut turtle," it was caramel and didn't break apart so easily. We all got a good laugh out of it.
Lots of people came tonight. Peg, Steve-o, my new roomie for next year...and I barely got to talk to any of them. My brother thrust a wrapped box into my hands. My family bought me an Oscar statue and had it engraved. I had just enough time to thank them before I had to run into the theatre for the review. My dad and brother drove two hours one way to see me and I barely got to say two words to them. I didn't get to talk to my mom, my aunt, my grandma, or Mike after the show.
Gugu ran home to change into jeans and a t-shirt. I told her that by the time she got back that the review would be done and I could go change into an AP t-shirt (no point in putting on the dress) and we would head out immediately.
The reviewer was from Tri-C. And he took his damn time with the review. Every little details...set, props, lights, sound, management, and every character/actor one-by-one.
His review took forty-five fucking minutes. It was over at 11:20pm.
*sighs* That's why I am still here. Even if Gugu and I had driven 90 mph to Sandusky, we still would have missed the toast, the highlight of the night. Everyone would have been already plastered...or well on their way. Basically, we would have been driving to go to bed.
After we decided not to go and I was getting ready to leave Gundlach, Dr. G stopped to congratulate me. This January, I am going to compete in the Irene Ryan's. I've been waiting for this for three years.
And right now I could fucking care less.
Brian felt bad that I had to miss formal...he knew how much I was looking forward to it. He invited me to come with him to the Heid house, but I declined. It was really sweet of him to offer...and any other night, I probably would have said yes...but I did not want to spend the night away from my fraternity with another.
I am so fucking pissed off...I can't even begin to convey my emotions on this. I have been waiting to go to this formal for weeks...my first and only chance to spend time with my seniors...Davey is graduating...Seth already graduated.
I don't want to see the pictures...I want to be in the pictures.
I don't want to hear the stories...I want to see the stories.
The men and women of Alpha Phi Tau have been absolutely amazing to me this past year. They have done so much for me and I cannot thank them enough. All I wanted was to spend this one night with them.
Instead, I am here with a box of Kleenex...feeling shitty that I didn't get to spend any time with my family...that I was so rude to Mike because I couldn't say good night to him...looking at my dress that I didn't get to wear...staring at the box with the Oscar statue that I want to throw across the room...and wanting to castrate the men who finally nominated me for the award I have been so impatiently waiting for.
And what do I have to look forward to tomorrow?
The worst choir concert in the world, a WLIIA meeting that no one will attend, and closing night of my favorite show ever.
Best night of my life, huh?
*Charlie Brown -- argh*
Tonight was supposed to be the best night of the school year. So why the fuck am I spending it in tears?
Everything started out well, for the most part. I met my mom, grandma, aunt and Mike at Olive Garden. My aunt and grandma bought me a gorgeous bouquet of roses in a very pretty vase. We all had dinner...that chicken was amazing. My dad and my brother ran late and by the time they showed up at the restaurant, Mike and I had to leave.
We came back to my room and had some amazing time to ourselves. The first time we got to lie down together on my bed. It was special. And I loved it.
I introduced Mike to Brian before the show. They are both great guys and so civilized.
I ran into Gugu before getting into my costume. Yay formal!!
The show had its ups and downs. Kissing and flashing Brian with my family and boyfriend in the audience was much less painful than I had been anticipating. The telephone rang, the television worked. Someone called Jes in the middle of one of the scenes and I had to talk my way out of it. I lost my headband five minutes before I needed it. Brian, Pat, Jes, and Emily were all running around trying to find it. When Brian went on stage, I didn't have one. Pat found it upstairs in the costume room and got it to me right before I went on. Took Brian completely by surprise. lol The interview went fine. Stage crew forgot to put out the coffee cake, so I had to set it out myself. When Michelle and I had to break apart our "peanut turtle," it was caramel and didn't break apart so easily. We all got a good laugh out of it.
Lots of people came tonight. Peg, Steve-o, my new roomie for next year...and I barely got to talk to any of them. My brother thrust a wrapped box into my hands. My family bought me an Oscar statue and had it engraved. I had just enough time to thank them before I had to run into the theatre for the review. My dad and brother drove two hours one way to see me and I barely got to say two words to them. I didn't get to talk to my mom, my aunt, my grandma, or Mike after the show.
Gugu ran home to change into jeans and a t-shirt. I told her that by the time she got back that the review would be done and I could go change into an AP t-shirt (no point in putting on the dress) and we would head out immediately.
The reviewer was from Tri-C. And he took his damn time with the review. Every little details...set, props, lights, sound, management, and every character/actor one-by-one.
His review took forty-five fucking minutes. It was over at 11:20pm.
*sighs* That's why I am still here. Even if Gugu and I had driven 90 mph to Sandusky, we still would have missed the toast, the highlight of the night. Everyone would have been already plastered...or well on their way. Basically, we would have been driving to go to bed.
After we decided not to go and I was getting ready to leave Gundlach, Dr. G stopped to congratulate me. This January, I am going to compete in the Irene Ryan's. I've been waiting for this for three years.
And right now I could fucking care less.
Brian felt bad that I had to miss formal...he knew how much I was looking forward to it. He invited me to come with him to the Heid house, but I declined. It was really sweet of him to offer...and any other night, I probably would have said yes...but I did not want to spend the night away from my fraternity with another.
I am so fucking pissed off...I can't even begin to convey my emotions on this. I have been waiting to go to this formal for weeks...my first and only chance to spend time with my seniors...Davey is graduating...Seth already graduated.
I don't want to see the pictures...I want to be in the pictures.
I don't want to hear the stories...I want to see the stories.
The men and women of Alpha Phi Tau have been absolutely amazing to me this past year. They have done so much for me and I cannot thank them enough. All I wanted was to spend this one night with them.
Instead, I am here with a box of Kleenex...feeling shitty that I didn't get to spend any time with my family...that I was so rude to Mike because I couldn't say good night to him...looking at my dress that I didn't get to wear...staring at the box with the Oscar statue that I want to throw across the room...and wanting to castrate the men who finally nominated me for the award I have been so impatiently waiting for.
And what do I have to look forward to tomorrow?
The worst choir concert in the world, a WLIIA meeting that no one will attend, and closing night of my favorite show ever.
Best night of my life, huh?