I've reached the end of the line, this is my stop
So today was okay. I got my hair cut and re-dyed last night. I got wall to wall compliments. But I still hate myself. I loved it last night, but I hate it now. I was all happy because I talked to Mikey in sixth hour today and he told me he'd be home so I could call him and make plans to hang out and and go figure, no one answered. I'm just going to quit calling him. And I'm just going to give up on him period. I'm not going to talk to him at all anymore. I'm sick of feeling all happy because I think I'm going to get to talk to him or see him and then I don't...and then I feel like a worthless piece of shit. Which is basically what I am anyways...He makes me cry.
How the fuck do you like someone and tell them they are more important than most of your other friends and then you still ignore them?
I'm nothing to no one. I give up on trying to be with anyone in general. I'm not meant to be with anyone anyways so why freakin try? I think I'm just going to talk to Jenny, Liz, Sara, Rochelle, and Brock from now on and that's it. They're the only ones I ever really talk to anymore anyways.
Oh my gosh and I'm getting aggrivated because Brock keeps saying his poems are shitty. They aren't. I like them. Maybe I'm stupid. Maybe I don't know what good is. He thinks mine are good. He surely needs his head examined because reality says they fucking blow.
This song (Sun By: Mae) makes me sad. It makes me think of a lot of stuff. And that makes me cry. For once in a couple weeks I've felt like cutting. I don't know I just haven't felt happy. Like I have a reason to be here. And you know what, you can read this and think I'm being stupid, but I don't give a shit. You don't understand so don't judge me. And anyone who wants to quit talking to me if I cut again...go ahead cus it's not like you're here through the hard times anyways. It's always the people who claim they are my best friends who tell me if I cut they'll never talk to me again. And it's funny because I never see them anyways so how can they possibly call me their best friend? It's not as if they give a flying fuck whether I live or die anyways because if they did, they'd be here with me instead of forgetting I exist until the fateful day they read that I want to cut myself. Grow up bitches. Learn the definition of what a true friend is and then when you want to be one, let me know. MY TRUE BEST FRIEND has been here for everything though. She's never let me down. Maybe you should take notes from her. Jenny, you're my best friend, I love you. So basically this is just my big fuck you to everyone. SO FUCK YOU.
Christina DOESN'T GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE Holmes
How the fuck do you like someone and tell them they are more important than most of your other friends and then you still ignore them?
I'm nothing to no one. I give up on trying to be with anyone in general. I'm not meant to be with anyone anyways so why freakin try? I think I'm just going to talk to Jenny, Liz, Sara, Rochelle, and Brock from now on and that's it. They're the only ones I ever really talk to anymore anyways.
Oh my gosh and I'm getting aggrivated because Brock keeps saying his poems are shitty. They aren't. I like them. Maybe I'm stupid. Maybe I don't know what good is. He thinks mine are good. He surely needs his head examined because reality says they fucking blow.
This song (Sun By: Mae) makes me sad. It makes me think of a lot of stuff. And that makes me cry. For once in a couple weeks I've felt like cutting. I don't know I just haven't felt happy. Like I have a reason to be here. And you know what, you can read this and think I'm being stupid, but I don't give a shit. You don't understand so don't judge me. And anyone who wants to quit talking to me if I cut again...go ahead cus it's not like you're here through the hard times anyways. It's always the people who claim they are my best friends who tell me if I cut they'll never talk to me again. And it's funny because I never see them anyways so how can they possibly call me their best friend? It's not as if they give a flying fuck whether I live or die anyways because if they did, they'd be here with me instead of forgetting I exist until the fateful day they read that I want to cut myself. Grow up bitches. Learn the definition of what a true friend is and then when you want to be one, let me know. MY TRUE BEST FRIEND has been here for everything though. She's never let me down. Maybe you should take notes from her. Jenny, you're my best friend, I love you. So basically this is just my big fuck you to everyone. SO FUCK YOU.
Christina DOESN'T GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE Holmes