(no subject)
I feel.
I just got back from the beach last night. I had a good time I guess...but not really. Lets see...where do I start?
Well we get to Holden beach on Tuesday...Me, Stefan, Alexis, and their mom. We start drinking...I drink too much...me and Alexis throw up by the end of the night...and that ends night one.
Next day we go to the beach and whatnot...I'm drunk. I don't think I'm gonna announce every time I'm drunk in this entry, because I was practically drunk the whole time (I'm not trying to bragg either. It just gives effect in my opinion. I've never been one of those people to try to be the most fucked up and catalogue what I've drank, drunk, consumed, smoked, blah blah, etc...frankly, those people anger me, and I've really enjoyed being sober lately...but I'm straying from the main idea.) So the whole time just becomes a watching movie, go to the beach, drinking kinda time...which I knew was going to get old soon. Corey gets there on the second day. We go out on the beach to have a couple beers, play some guitar and they smoke a joint. It was fun...we had some laughs, came back to the little beach house and watched American History X. I love that movie. It had been a little bit since I had seen it last...that shit hits pretty hard every time.
Well day three comes...Corey, Stefan, and I are becoming sick of each other. Who cares though, we're brothers, and that kinda shit happens from time to time...but what really killed me was last night.
Johnny and BP come down and we all play kings and get hammered, we end up going to Broadway at the Beach in Myrtle. Well it becomes a bad time (after finally finding the shit) once we realize we can't do shit there because we aren't old enough to go in most clubs and all that jazz. So we're just aimlessly wandering around looking at girls. Corey and I get into a little arguement on the way out over some dumb shit...and then I finally realize that we're getting sick of each other. It finally hits me hard...my drunk ass is facing reality. I'm facing the fact that things are changing. This has nothing to do with friendship, we got over the arguement. I'm facing the realization that our crew...two of my best friends are no longer going to be there. We're getting in the truck after me and Corey were bitching at eachother. Stefan is acting like a fucking dick around Johnny and Stefan talking shit on me and Corey because we're argueing. And I just say out loud..."You know what, we're getting sick of each other...we're fucking getting sick of each other a day before Stefan leaves, less than a month before Corey leaves, and less than a month before I leave...we're sitting here argueing and bitching when our fucking crew is being split up...theres no more of this shit...its come and gone way too soon." We're all left speechless, thoughts of apologizing to Corey running through my head, but I think he knew anyways...and I swear, as much as I hated it...the tears started forming in my eyes. I tried to hold them back...but it was impossible. I swear I was too drunk...I could have been crying alcohol. I sit there on the ride back to Holden beach...not a word spoken, with fucking tears in my eyes. Stefan leaves tomorrow morning...and I've gotta head out to Coreys house tonight and say my goodbyes. I just can't believe it.
I just got back from the beach last night. I had a good time I guess...but not really. Lets see...where do I start?
Well we get to Holden beach on Tuesday...Me, Stefan, Alexis, and their mom. We start drinking...I drink too much...me and Alexis throw up by the end of the night...and that ends night one.
Next day we go to the beach and whatnot...I'm drunk. I don't think I'm gonna announce every time I'm drunk in this entry, because I was practically drunk the whole time (I'm not trying to bragg either. It just gives effect in my opinion. I've never been one of those people to try to be the most fucked up and catalogue what I've drank, drunk, consumed, smoked, blah blah, etc...frankly, those people anger me, and I've really enjoyed being sober lately...but I'm straying from the main idea.) So the whole time just becomes a watching movie, go to the beach, drinking kinda time...which I knew was going to get old soon. Corey gets there on the second day. We go out on the beach to have a couple beers, play some guitar and they smoke a joint. It was fun...we had some laughs, came back to the little beach house and watched American History X. I love that movie. It had been a little bit since I had seen it last...that shit hits pretty hard every time.
Well day three comes...Corey, Stefan, and I are becoming sick of each other. Who cares though, we're brothers, and that kinda shit happens from time to time...but what really killed me was last night.
Johnny and BP come down and we all play kings and get hammered, we end up going to Broadway at the Beach in Myrtle. Well it becomes a bad time (after finally finding the shit) once we realize we can't do shit there because we aren't old enough to go in most clubs and all that jazz. So we're just aimlessly wandering around looking at girls. Corey and I get into a little arguement on the way out over some dumb shit...and then I finally realize that we're getting sick of each other. It finally hits me hard...my drunk ass is facing reality. I'm facing the fact that things are changing. This has nothing to do with friendship, we got over the arguement. I'm facing the realization that our crew...two of my best friends are no longer going to be there. We're getting in the truck after me and Corey were bitching at eachother. Stefan is acting like a fucking dick around Johnny and Stefan talking shit on me and Corey because we're argueing. And I just say out loud..."You know what, we're getting sick of each other...we're fucking getting sick of each other a day before Stefan leaves, less than a month before Corey leaves, and less than a month before I leave...we're sitting here argueing and bitching when our fucking crew is being split up...theres no more of this shit...its come and gone way too soon." We're all left speechless, thoughts of apologizing to Corey running through my head, but I think he knew anyways...and I swear, as much as I hated it...the tears started forming in my eyes. I tried to hold them back...but it was impossible. I swear I was too drunk...I could have been crying alcohol. I sit there on the ride back to Holden beach...not a word spoken, with fucking tears in my eyes. Stefan leaves tomorrow morning...and I've gotta head out to Coreys house tonight and say my goodbyes. I just can't believe it.