its been a bad day....

[failbydesign75]

i went from having fun in the sun with not a care in the world while i was on vacation to come home and get hit with a realitiy check of what life is and what goes on this world. you know we all watch or hear the news and everyday we see war and sudicides and homocides and we think we are affected by those things but you never really affected until it happens to you or someone you know. you hear about someone killing their wife or children and you think 'what a physco' and kinda brush it off but than when its someone you know you dont think that. you know that there is more to the story, you know there has got to be a good motive...you just try so hard to take the most humanistic spin on murder you possibly can because you dont want to believe they actully killed someone. you wanna fight so hard but there is nothing you can do, it happend its over someones dead and someones in jail. i've never been so confused in my life. i've never had something feel so unreal but i know it is but i dont want to believe it. i have so many emotion running around my head. i cant believe he would do something like this..i know that if i didnt know him and i just saw it randomly on the news i would be like "oh whatever he deserves to be in jail" but i know him i know he couldnt possibly do something like this which out a good reason like self defense or something. i dont know i love him and my prayers are with him and his family. i will not think less of him just because of an action he took (although it was a bad one) i love him he was my friend for 7 years and that will never change he will be on my mind and in my heart
..i'm talking like hes the dead one, i feel like hes the dead one but hes not..i'm just soo confused.....