swine flu, stop teaching me lessons.
fuck. this flu is kicking my ass. i'm still sick. yes, still.
i'm at the point where i'm frustrated. i'm not good at sitting still. i'm just. not. i've got no energy to do anything. i try and all it does is wear me out or basically. i'm not capable. i've tried writing about this many times however each time i get too fucking sleepy in the middle to finish it. daytime tv is rotting my brain. also, it's fucking lonely being this sick. i live far enough i guess out of the city for people to come see me? i'm not contagious anymore (no fever for three or four days now). i want to be at the barn dance, spinning with friends. but. i just woke up from a nap. and i think i am going to go take another one.
i'm really over this.
body, let's make a deal. i'll slow things down a bit if you just let get better. okay? because this. this is getting old.
i don't ever know what the fuck i'm trying to say. just. frustrated. and lonely. and sick. and i hate all of these!
p.s. this is not a plea for "i'm so sorry" comments. this is just me wanting to scream and yell at people when they still say "you're still sick?" because yes, i know you are being nice. but god damn. i'm still sick. and i'm pissed! and now i'm laughing for being pissed at people asking how i am. i am ridic. and going back to bed.
i'm at the point where i'm frustrated. i'm not good at sitting still. i'm just. not. i've got no energy to do anything. i try and all it does is wear me out or basically. i'm not capable. i've tried writing about this many times however each time i get too fucking sleepy in the middle to finish it. daytime tv is rotting my brain. also, it's fucking lonely being this sick. i live far enough i guess out of the city for people to come see me? i'm not contagious anymore (no fever for three or four days now). i want to be at the barn dance, spinning with friends. but. i just woke up from a nap. and i think i am going to go take another one.
i'm really over this.
body, let's make a deal. i'll slow things down a bit if you just let get better. okay? because this. this is getting old.
i don't ever know what the fuck i'm trying to say. just. frustrated. and lonely. and sick. and i hate all of these!
p.s. this is not a plea for "i'm so sorry" comments. this is just me wanting to scream and yell at people when they still say "you're still sick?" because yes, i know you are being nice. but god damn. i'm still sick. and i'm pissed! and now i'm laughing for being pissed at people asking how i am. i am ridic. and going back to bed.