On the Verge of Rebirth?
I took a nap today for three hours and had the strangest dream that I was suspended between death and life. I was a sort of ghost, and my body was transparent and surrounded by a filmy aura that fluttered past my feet like your traditional white-sheeted ghosts. I had a guide to lead me through the mortal world, a girl of about my age, and she was trying to help me by alerting others that I was in this state, but they couldn't see me, and every time she pointed to me, they saw nothing. I felt frustrated, but also liberated in a way. I could float from any angle, although for some reason I still was afraid of standing on the edge of a large indoor waterfall, because I feared I might fall. As if I could still die.
This semester, for me, has been one that has primarily dealt with death and rebirth. My grandfather died in January, that's the literal part, and it seems that every novel I have read this semester has forced me to reason with death, attack it, analyze it to the point of confusion. Now I'm graduating and I will die and be reborn as something new. This is a good thing, I know, as neccessary and beneficial to my being as death itself is, perhaps. But maybe right now all I do feel is suspension, a tenacity of mixed fears and hopes and other college graduate clichées, all bound up in one filmy, fluttering aura.
This semester, for me, has been one that has primarily dealt with death and rebirth. My grandfather died in January, that's the literal part, and it seems that every novel I have read this semester has forced me to reason with death, attack it, analyze it to the point of confusion. Now I'm graduating and I will die and be reborn as something new. This is a good thing, I know, as neccessary and beneficial to my being as death itself is, perhaps. But maybe right now all I do feel is suspension, a tenacity of mixed fears and hopes and other college graduate clichées, all bound up in one filmy, fluttering aura.